Woulda wear these noise helmets to a bar? Europe’s doin it (4 Photos)

Meet the newest weapon against ambient social noise. It's called a 'social sphere'. Simply harness the lightweight speech bubble to your head and go out drinking. If you want to talk to somebody just connect your retard helmets spheres! Besides drinking with a goldfish bowl on your head and then drowning in your own vomit, this is the most practical device I've seen in ages. There are even stationary spheres in case you need to bury your heads in a fixed table unit to discuss global warming and your new cat. Christ.

  • inv8erzim

    Get Smart! would.

  • Fontane

    I’m 6’8, so I hate this.

  • Doug


  • Zooks

    bad breath would suck

    • mook

      I have an idea, find a bar that isn’t cranked so loud you can’t even communicate with anyone FIVE WHOLE INCHES FROM YOUR FACE. Whoa what a concept huh?

  • Belisario

    They look like Brits.. and Britain is not part of Europe.. it’s just a island with degenerated, ugly people..

    • madamecursorla


    • P-90

      Yeah funny,. except for the fact that’s it’s not you ignorant inbred cunt.

      • inv8erzim

        P-90 bringing the ‘C’ word into play!! F YEAH!!

        • P-90

          Well if someone acts like a cunt, they should be prepared to be called on it.

    • josh

      reminds me to fuck your mum !! retards

    • Irwin 109

      Ah Belisario, you’re as retarded as you are annoying, Britain is part of Europe, they don’t look British and trying to say an entire nation is ugly is possibly more spastic than your geography!

  • Bill

    Just what I always wanted–a way to guarantee that I catch every last germ to come out of another person’s mouth.

  • Anon

    Is bluewaffle.net HHNF?

    • HellHathNoFury

      The fact that you know what that is and have asked the same question and posted the same sick crap several times over a few months speaks more about your worth than I could ever articulate.

    • Leif Erikson

      why did i google that site?>_<

  • stafferty

    This is going to make it a lot harder to pretend I don’t hear her when she asks for me to buy her a drink.

  • top dog

    It’s a fad. Like farts in the wind, it will pass.

  • dooby

    Europe most definitely ain’t doing this. And Belisario? You prick.

  • Robbo

    Europeans always were a little off

  • Beamer

    No, thanks you.

  • yayrum

    I’ve never seen one of those in Britain and lots of brits don’t consider themselves European so who knows what the rest of Europe is doing.

  • LordRetardHelmet


  • McBeastie

    Those noise helmets are almost as retarded as most of Chive’s headlines to their threads. “Woulda wear these noise helmets…..” What the fuck kind of a sentence is that?

  • mattguy9000

    Or they could- you know- turn the DAMN MUSIC DOWN!

  • Klutz

    Agent 99, why i don’t listen anything?

  • nouu

    not suprising that europe is doing it considering europe is full of stupid fucking douche bags.

  • terry


  • dt520

    Want quiet? Stay home, I’m sick of people going to loud places and then getting mad about the lack of silence. You have lots of it at home, go back.

  • Mr.Doom

    first off im from europe, and well WTF are those things and what are they meant to do?

  • Matt

    lol this is so stupid.

  • Irwin 109

    Glad this hasn’t hit the UK that I know of, it looks ridiculous, scratch that, it IS ridiculous! Also having those people model it makes it even less appealing!

    • MichaelGS

      Can’t be the UK. They’re not ratfaced enough and fighting after too many beers. Looks like mainland Europe where they drink alcohol in moderation, and only if theyre thirsty… What a waste of alcohol 😦

      • Irwin 109

        I’m one of those rare ‘Brit’s’ who doesn’t really drink much, although I believe binge drinking is over-emphasised, either they drink everyday like that in which case they’re not binging, they’re an alcoholic, if they only drink like that at the weekend that’s a damn good weekend. Also where did Brit’s having ratfaces come from? Never heard that one before, I’m pretty sure I don’t look like a rodent…. And those who fight after too many beers here usually pick the wrong opponent and wake up in the same place the next morning wondering why they hurt so much.

        • MichaelGS

          I’m also a Brit that doesnt drink all that much, but I question your Britishness if you havent heard the expression ratfaced/shitfaced/face as a term for extremely drunk

          • Irwin 109

            Ah yeah, we use shitfaced around here, ratfaced makes me think Shelley Duvall, from the days of The Shining!

  • shanna

    i cant even come home from a club the sweater a braught with let alone a gigantic bubble that is totaly gonna suck when youre dancing, or making the moves on a random stranger…ok and the puke aspect is just terrible….id totaly go for a huge bubble bed with surround sound 🙂 awesome m/m/

  • HongDug

    You are an excellent wtirer even if I have thought your writing seems sad sometimes! I am so glad you are honest! The truth will set you free, is true! I love you and I am so blessed to be your Mom!

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