Ok, ok, not all Newcastle girls are Sea Donkeys. Cheryl Cole saves the day (25 Photos)

If you haven't tuned into the Daily Afternoon Randomness over the past few days, I've hammered the women of Newcastle, England, mercilessly. And for good reason: most of them are mutant monsters. So I've been ignoring the hundreds of emails from our English Chivers screaming that Cheryl Cole is from Newcastle. This would restore the town's pristine standing as a preeminent source of English hotties (of course).

Note: I want to see some real Newcastle girls. I've been sent dozens of photos of girls from Da Castle, all of whom look like something out of a horror film. Let's see some real hotties. Send them to me using our handy-dandy upload page and I'll post them in today's Randomness.

  • powpow

    She is a f###ing sea donkey and looks as rough as hell.

  • sirforsyth

    Exceptions that prove the rule.

  • SMK

    #15 is with out a doubt my FAVORITE one..

  • top dog

    Ok so two women, what about the rest of em?

  • Anonymous

    Thank god for Cheryl Cole! Our sexy saviour!

  • mcctan24

    Hahahah silly europenis's

  • equalizermax

    I will go there on summer just to check it out…

  • MasonGWebbington

    fucking fail…big fucking fail…Duff, Vida, etc. and so one…looks like someone mailed this one in…

  • theone

    yea most of the girls in this post are no way from newcastle and the best pic out of all of these is the upskirt #15 # 16 and 24 and even if these chicks were from newcastle as soon as the open thier mouth they lost me

  • Anonymous

    Cheryl cole is actually Vida Guerra tattoo dead give away

  • Trev

    look at 6 then 19. notice anything different? haha

  • Chrispeena

    #10 is Hilary Duff?

  • Niitsitapi13

    Wow. Just 1 huh? God bless America!

  • dennis

    number 22 is vida guerra! come on guys

  • insomnia

    #22 is vida guerra…dont matter if the name is wrong but the pic still looks good

  • nox

    Cole is gorgeous….the obvious…

  • http://twitter.com/Suburbsexaddict @Suburbsexaddict

    Hey what about The Fat Slags, Sandra and Tracey? Though Wikipedia says they're from Nottingham, not Newcastle.

  • Ben

    a place with over 250,000 people is bound to have at least 2 good looking women. the fact that someone from newcastle thinks the girls from #2 are attractive is enough proof for me that newcastle girls are woefully unattractive….

    unless the poster of #2 was just trolling. in that case, well done?

  • DigbyChickenCeasar

    Yes she's pretty but not pretty enough to ignore the terrible accent.

  • its_forge

    I would like to lick Cheryl Cole in places that can only be accurately described by someone with a university-level degree in anatomy and physiology.

  • Guest

    Newcastle used to be the best place to get coal. Some things never change, I guess.

  • Queue

    I believe the correct term is "swamp donkey".

  • RJM

    I think number #20 may be the only time we see her with a big cock in her hand 😦

  • adobe

    America will be very familiar with the brilliance of Cheryl Cole in about 6 months…she's getting $3M to do some crap X-Factor / American Idol TV show with Simon Cowell – but you'll get to see her every week. And that accent…MERCY! She makes up for every other munter in Newcastle…

  • Jen

    I'm a straight girl but I would seriously consider turnine lesbian for Cheryl Cole, she is absolutely the most gorgeous woman I've ever seen 🙂

    • Jen

      Eerr, I meant turning*

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