Ok, ok, not all Newcastle girls are Sea Donkeys. Cheryl Cole saves the day (25 Photos)

If you haven't tuned into the Daily Afternoon Randomness over the past few days, I've hammered the women of Newcastle, England, mercilessly. And for good reason: most of them are mutant monsters. So I've been ignoring the hundreds of emails from our English Chivers screaming that Cheryl Cole is from Newcastle. This would restore the town's pristine standing as a preeminent source of English hotties (of course).

Note: I want to see some real Newcastle girls. I've been sent dozens of photos of girls from Da Castle, all of whom look like something out of a horror film. Let's see some real hotties. Send them to me using our handy-dandy upload page and I'll post them in today's Randomness.

  • Jacklovesariot

    You guys review your photos at all. In this post I saw Vida Guerra and Hillary Duff. Great Job!!

  • The Dude

    #6 is photoshop. There's no sun in England. Fuck it.

  • Brad

    Cheryl has a border line "uni-boob"…

  • Locode

    Chery will soon enough be back to being Cheryl Tweedy, as she dumped her toe-rag of a cheating dickwad husband, aka Ashley Cole of Chel$ki.

    She's pretty much a slag herself anyways. Avoid Newcastle unless you enjoy corpulent shirtless men and women.

  • Mike

    #2 is sexy as hell

  • thomas

    Love the ass on #11

  • http://www.wildsound-filmmaking-feedback-events.com/images/cheryl_cole_before_and_after.jpg WELL HUNG DOUG

    Cheryl Cole only looks like that because of the amount of money she spends on looking good. Newcastle are full of hippo's and manatees. Me and my Dad took a wrong turn there once and ended up walking through a council estate – words cannot describe the gunts,pig faces and general skankiness I saw.

  • mike

    #17 midget?

  • Stu

    I bet their busy

  • twat

    Its also possible that all the hot girls from Newcastle don't have pictures online. I'm not from Newcastle but have met several stunning geordie lasses.
    So I wouldn't judge all geordie girls from the 1 picture of minging ones.

    I also see a lot of pics of fat ugly ass americans from (insert state) but I don't judge.

    • Htownpunk

      You just did dipshit……..

  • >18Only

    #10 is Hillary Duff. No doubt.

    Laura Haddock is a sea donkey with a shitty weave. Try harder Chive.

  • buster nut

    I live right next to the toilet know as Newcastle, and whilst I can definitely agree there are some tasty females there. I can guarantee that for every man there are 30 – 40 right fucking munters. Seriously, the tide wouldnt take them out. They have the loudest mouth you will ever hear and if you cross them they will happily smash a bottle in your face then go home for a kebab. On the other hand, if by midnight you havent picked up one of these fine specimens (ahem) head to the Bigg Market where you will surely pick up a freebie.
    And an STI

  • Eierkopp

    #6 wiz a bit whiskey, please

  • Optimus Subprime

    No clue who Cheryl Cole is but good lord and baby Jesus thank you…

  • Sima Tien

    What about Jayne Middlemiss

  • Anonymous

    #22 is Vida Guerra and she is originally from Cuba. Do a better job of screening the photos next time.

  • Neverseenxfactorme

    She's the biggest Geordie slapper of them all.

    Ashley's well shut of the manipulative bitch.

  • MrMav

    Cheryl Cole is the Ultra babe and the most beautiful in the world

  • thebrewha

    #22 is vida guerra FHM's famous latina

  • http://twitter.com/SnakeMxR @SnakeMxR

    I live in Newcastle!!! Plenty of fine ladys!! i bet if i go to America i could point out all the fat ladies and go well this sucks but it doesnt matter where you go.. theres always hot and not..

  • Always Last


  • bex

    Cheryl has a pretty face and a okish body, she has terrible fashion sence, she's a chav and can't sing to save her life. All in all she should quite the singing and maybe do a few reality shows, I'd defo watch tht hahahaha

  • isolation

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