• hurr

    first

    • PoopIsFun

      ghey

  • justanothercanadian

    wow thechive is a 24/7 website now?

  • Its me

    I watch soccer once every 4 years during the world cup. That is enough for me.

    • gaz

      shit like this is ruining football that and the insane wages they now claim for their temporary loyalty

      • AnyoneForCoffee

        With you.

        Idiots being made multi-millionaires by us for not doing anything.

    • David

      The world cup? Don't you mean the vuvuzela ceremonies?

  • stone cold nipples

    what a faggot

    • http://www.facebook.com/pcribaudo Pete Ribaudo

      that is literally word for word what i said outloud watching this.

    • Ken

      I think I would've only called him a "faggot" if he forced the other man to grab his nuts. But that would have been rape instead – either way, it would make for amusing TV.

  • Frankie

    The narrator said "It´s like a joke from the Three stooges" lol

    • john dory

      commentator*

  • FullBlownStoned

    Ahahahah… yep that's a part of football.

    • bud

      and i just dont get it. what if rugby had the same rules on over-aggressiveness?

    • gok attack

      only latin american football, faggot men….beautiful women

      • Mario

        You forget Italian…worst floppers in the history of the sport.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Peter-Dexter/549765303 Peter Dexter

    god damn i hate that sport….

    • http://twitter.com/141characters @141characters

      DON'T hate the sport. hate what cheaters and pussys have done to the sport. it used to be and sometimes still is a game of gentlemanly respect for the opponents and ones self.

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/Peter-Dexter/549765303 Peter Dexter

        yes but at a professional level it involves more flailing and faking getting hurt than wrestling

  • http://www.1guy1cup.net anon

    It's called football. Because you predominantly use your foot. And it's played with a ball.

    But hey, the National Handegg League's Superbowl is nice too!

    • nato2101

      Its called football because it is played ON foot as opposed to the "nobles'" sports which are played on a horse (polo, hunting, zoophilia, etc). Hence why they are called American football, association football, rugby football (its actual name), Gaelic football, Aussie football. In fact the only "football" in which the players primarily use their feet is soccer (which is an English term not American, coined by the an man from Oxford (iirc) in the 19th century.

      • beermonkey

        Too bad only you americans call it soccer then. The rest of the world calls it football, so I guess you lose.

        • James W

          No, it's soccer in Australia too.

        • nato2101

          Its soccer in Ireland (Eire not the British part), Australia, New Zealand and any other country who already had a popular form of "football" before the association football was formalized.
          This explains it quite well. http://www.soccer-fans-info.com/origin-of-the-wor

          and I'm not American, I've never been outside of Europe.

          • You are wrong

            Ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Nato2101 Im from Ireland and its called football, Gaelic football is called gaa. Which is a reference to the association that runs the gaelic football competitions, the G.A.A

          • mar

            check your facts!

            • nato2101

              Two of the most widely distributed news papers in Ireland using the term not enough? How about the national broadcaster http://www.rte.ie/sport/

              And you can go on the government site gov.ie/en and type in football and see how many ass. football hits you get.

              • http://twitter.com/141characters @141characters

                ha! facts. can't get enough of them. truth is so annoying when it points out our ignorance. i like the facts and all the links. well done.

              • nato2101

                One final thing a colleague from Dublin just told, the Ireland wiki pages refers to "soccer" over and over again, whilst the England, Wales and Scotland pages have next to no mention of soccer (it is used in the title of one source on the Scotland page).
                I think it is fair to assume the Ireland page is handled by Irish people, who apparently use the word "soccer" to differentiate between the two sports.

        • ramalamadingdong

          The English invented it so they can get to name it.

      • a.i.

        nato2101 by your definition basketball is football, volleyball is football, handball is football and so on… and there are not many sports that are not played on foot so almost every sport is football.. that doesn't sound right yeah? or is it just me?

    • hamanahamana

      It seems that the general trend is that unruly ex-colonies of Britain tend to use the "soccer" word, not much unlike a teenager trying to rebel against his/her father. But they all grow up some day.

      • James

        Soccer is a British term. Rugby was 'Rugger', Association football was 'Soccer'. Former colonies kept the term because of the cultural contact with Britain. It has nothing to do with 'growing up'.. more to do with 'keeping the same name the Brits themselves came up with.'

        • hamanahamana

          Your joke detection skills are amazing, mister James!

    • Jack S

      Haha 'Handegg' has made my day 😀

      • turbosmurf

        it's a popular alternative name for American Football.

    • v4vendetta14

      Seriously, you can take your faggoty sport, your flailing cry baby players and your crowds full of vuvuzelas and shove them up your ass!!! Football is a game where 22 neanderthals on steroids and human growth hormones battle like men.

      • ramalamadingdong

        you must have it confused with rugby..football is where a bunch of men in tights shove and grapple at each other in between Gatorade breaks

        • Cloud or Champion

          You forgot to mention that they are armoured like medieval knights as well. It is easy to "battle" with all that protection it takes guts to do the same without the protection.

          • Tim

            If you think American football players are "armored," what do you think of hockey?

            The only things that really do much are the big shoulderpads and helmets. Secondly, rugby does not yield the same type of constant contact (believe it or not) that football does. Every play involves pretty much every player running into each other constantly. If rugby was ALL scrums, then you could make the argument that it involves more contact, but it doesn't. Secondly, there's no such thing as a blindside hit on a defenseless QB in rugby.

            Similarly, players are built for one specific position that handles one specific thing. Receivers are not built to take hits. If you want to compare players from the sports, look at runningbacks and linebackers. Those are the closest comparisons, and I'm betting pretty much every NFL linebacker would be a very good rugby player after adjusting to the rules and learning the game.

            • Tim

              I'd like to clarify, though, that rugby players are EXTREMELY tough, and probably moreso than the NFL, and I'm amazed that they're willing to go out and do that stuff without pads.

              I just don't care for people bashing the NFL as if those guys don't take ridiculous beatings every game.

    • Albarinn

      hahahahahahahahahahaha National Handegg League priceless good one dude…

    • Grant

      Saying that calling it "Soccer" makes no sense is ignorant. Clearly those who believe this to be true have no idea about the history of the sport.
      http://cheekymax.blogspot.com/2006/07/soccer-etym

  • Head Chef

    It would take more than a moment to list all the things I hate about American "Football".

    • 6655321

      You could post a random video of it, that'll do.

    • http://www.facebook.com/tylermars.design Tyler Mars

      well you sure as shit don't see this kind of bullshit going on in american football

      • Mario

        If fellow players didn't cornhole such a perpetrator out of the NFL then the fans would run him out of town…that is if the owners didn't blackball them.

        • DaddyD

          Of course you see this in American Football. Biting and gouging and ball grabbing in the pile-ups. Personal fouls. Coaches tripping players running down the sideline.

  • http://www.facebook.com/WBCenobyte Tim Grubbert

    Football (not your egg-game) rocks. Watch Premier League, Primera División or german Bundesliga for some great games. I am pretty sure one could dig up some douchebaggy videos about eggball in a second, too.

    • http://twitter.com/141characters @141characters

      yep. its called cheep shots. those are the same thing as dives in soccer/football.

      • andfukyamoms

        "I am pretty sure one could dig up some douchebaggy videos about eggball in a second, too."
        Then do it you loser. I bet it would take you a whole day to find any kind of dive. And you will never find anything remotely close to the video above.
        Soccer would be a whole lot cooler to me if the field was half the size and had only 6-8 people on each team. I'd rather watch a local indoor soccer match than a professional one that last 90 minutes with one goal scored. I respect that talent and skill level of the atheletes emmensely, and the strategy behind the game, but the constant diving in combination with the lack of action kills it for me.

        • RandomGuy

          immensely…not emmensely.

          • andfukyamoms

            yea…you right

    • Fuck off

      I would rather watch paint dry.

    • Kyle

      Don't watch the Primera or you'll see shit like this every game. EPL, Bundesliga or nothing

  • russ

    soccer is football. football is soccer. blah, blah, blah. all i know is that pussy moves like in that video are one of the reasons american football will always be more entertaining and exciting.

    • http://twitter.com/141characters @141characters

      no its one of the reasons it will never be big in America. America is a bad ass mentality place. the bigger the better, the harder the better, the more power the better. thats not what soccer is. soccer is a game of persistence and finesse. its not rough enough to spark the interests of those who thrive off the physicality of American football.

    • Steve

      Soccer would be more interesting if all the players had a fish bat or a cattle prod.

    • sam

      football, is turd, rugby all the way.

  • beermonkey

    Nice showmanship and ingeniuty! Made me LOL big time.
    Hey, it's only a foul if you get caught doing it.

    • http://twitter.com/141characters @141characters

      that comment makes me sick. everyone else here sees it as a perversion of the rules and accepts as an unfortunate aspect of the game. it's that kind of play that shows the pragmatic sickness that ruins great cultures and countries.

      • xXbeermonkeyXx

        shut up now, you need more beer

  • eclipze

    lol that's funny

  • JJm

    American Football > football. Football is perhaps the worst thing I have watched people argue and fight about in a bar. The only injuries are those faked or milked to the point where a child would tell them to man up.

    • turbosmurf

      at least they don't wear helmets and diapers like American handegg players.

      • http://twitter.com/141characters @141characters

        so you are comparing a standard gear for a sport to flopping.. cheating… unsportsman behavior. so you like and think cheating is a now acceptable tradition in soccer. nice. FAIL!

    • MadisonGunner

      Watch Arsenal v Tottenham, Liverpool v ManU, or any other good english derby and you'd have different thoughts. Though it sounds like you're an uncultured simpleton and wouldn't be able to understand it and would probably flip over to NASCAR and fuck your cousin.

    • go-devil

      Perhaps you should actually play a competitive game of soccer. then you might change your tune. those faked fouls don't come as often as you think, and when they do, it is usually to hopefully get an opposing player a red card (out), or to give your team time to organize defensively.

  • acadea

    you hate soccer because you watch south-american league matches

    • alonso

      south america have the best players of football in the world…argentinian and the brazilian league are fucking awesome…if it wasnt for our player european football would suck… sorry for mi english but im from south america 🙂

  • Joe

    I live in America. I eat at A&W. Monster trucks are okay, and I occasionally watch Gilmore Girls. That said, I don't like soccer. Or "football", as you people want to call it. This is America. I like watching real football. The one where 22 grown men beat the Shit out of each other to move a deformed ball a few yards down a turf field for our amusement.

    • mar

      Then should watch rugby and not the nfl

    • Adam

      Yeah, we have that too. But we call it rugby. And we don't bother with all the helmets and padding you pussys need.

      • Dan

        That's because they tackle like pussies in rugby. Rugby is a contact sport, American football is a COLLISION sport. If they hit in rugby like they do in American football, no one would survive a match.

        • carlos

          its actually illegal to tackle in rugby like you do in the NFL. Rugby fans always diss the NFL by saying that they are tougher since they dont wear pads. Its all about physics, NFL is about yards, meaning you have to stop the other player dead in his tracks, therefore two huge masses running straight at each other=huge impact. Rugby is about getting the correct placement of the ball when you fall so your team gets it, its about strategic tackling, where you have to hold on to the player as you fall down=not a very big impact.

          • Wolfram

            Probably mostly true but I was watching some big hits compilations of rugby and they were absolutely brutal. Easily as big as the biggest NFL hits… with no pads.

            • KB3

              Rugby is boring to me(opinion), and i watch and love both versions of football. NFL without the forward pass, obviously rugby is much different, but the point remains the same, is just not as exciting to watch. Nothing like watching Aaron Rodgers sit back and pick apart teams with the cannon attached to his right shoulder.

              • Wolfram

                Yeah, well, NFL is pretty shitty too when you compare to hockey.

          • Jack

            I guess Rugby League has the best of both worlds then. Far bigger hits than union and no padding.

    • Go-devil

      soccer was called football way before the american version waddled its way onto the sports scene, you ignorant twat.

  • PeterGun

    Reminds me of Rivaldo in the 2002 World cup.

  • your mom

    boring game no wonder it's supporters carry on off the field cause theres nothing to watch on it. any other sport you'd be booed off the field do it in this world game and your a hero.LAME

    • http://twitter.com/141characters @141characters

      so true.. any other sport.

  • god

    you dont watch "real football" you watch pussys rugby

    • http://twitter.com/141characters @141characters

      so would that make soccer the footballs mangina? horrible argument. if rugby is the bad ass football.. then that makes American football the feminine version… that means soccer is the queer's steer that falls over when the wind blows. F is for FAIL.

      • Go-devil

        actually no, because real football has nothing to do with rugby or the american basterdization of it. F is for FUCKING IDIOT.

    • Stephen

      tell me, where did all this sport originate?

  • Pistola

    'Watch one of the most ridiculous plays ever made in soccer'
    Comment:
    "Yep, I hate soccer because it is always like that…
    GO USA,USA,USA!"

  • americafuckyea

    American football is for pussies, try playing it without pads and a helmet then get back to me.

    • http://twitter.com/141characters @141characters

      mind of an American football player when someone is headed for them at full speed… "bring it!". mind of a soccer player in Europe, Africa, and Latin and South America when someone is headed for them at full speed. "so they are coming at me full speed, i can get them a yellow card, possibly a red, flail on the ground for 30 secs, let the team get some rest and water while i put my artistic form of acting to work, then hang out on the side line for a minute until someone sprays some cold air on my ankle. then back on the field. yep.. perfect." i see your point.. American football are pussies. F is for FAiL and you are dripping with it.

    • kent

      You're an idiot.

      If people played without pads in American football there would be deaths in every game. The players in American football are bigger, faster, heavier, and way more aggressive. People bring up Rugby, yet the average rugby player is smaller than the smallest running back in American football. A rugby player would leave any American football game, even a high school game, in a stretcher.

  • itellifyouask

    I have played soccer since I was 6, now 28, I have seen this shit trend happen over the years. I am a normal Midwesterner but when I play now I play with my Mexican dishwashers , and they are not into pussy shit like that. When I was a kid I crushed a bone in my wrist, I have had many scrapes, strains and bruises. I have never taken a fall. I have broken others ribs, arms tibia femurs, if I slide tackle you I am up and sprinting towards your goal before you see the blood coming out of your nose after you pull the grass out of it. Try to get into it with some Bavarians. But I digress, I have worked for the indoor champions in the US, and I know how hard these guys train, and most, at half the size, could take a linebacker.

    • you suck

      with that many broken body parts from soccer sounds as if you are a clumsy bastard

      • turbosmurf

        you sound like a lazy bastard that never did any sport in his life.

        • you still suck

          Maybe he is but he's still right. It's like saying "I box, and I get the shit kicked out of me every time". Maybe you should stop boxing then?

          • http://twitter.com/141characters @141characters

            no no no… cause if that's the way you felt should happen then when you fail at life… like you clearly have… should you end it? no way! the chive needs followers. hold onto chive… hold onto life.

    • Ryan

      You have obviously never gone up against a linebacker.

      • andfukyamoms

        I'de love to see em "take" ray lewis.

    • Ripley

      Rofl. "Take a linebacker"? Okay, pick your man (any size you want) and I'll pick Urlacher. We'll see who 'takes' who…

    • oswald

      how long have you been gay?

    • gest

      okay..

  • Thrice

    This is me acting like I care about all these comments….oops.

  • Jack S

    The 'Handegg' has made my day Haha!

    Who cares what it's called. In Soccer (football) the ball is in play for most of 90mins. In American Football its more like 4 mins… So I know which one i would rather watch 😛

    Anyway thats besides the point. I hate cheaters like this, and there in every sport!

    • http://twitter.com/141characters @141characters

      perfectly put. respect for both sports except lame cheaters like this.

      • Ryan

        No the ball is in play for much more than that and the clock is often stopped when not in play.

        • Jack S

          Sorry, I was going on a stat I knew from the last few Super Bowls. My uncle lives in NY and he told me. So If I got it wrong blame him 😛

          • Gazza

            No you are right, the pathetic sport that Americans love only has 4-15 mins of action over 4 or so hours. So the only reason I can see to watching is if you light men in tights bending over a lot, then groping, huddling and walking off the field ever 5mins for a commercial brake.
            There is a reason the tailgate party exists, to get so drunk you don't notice how boring the NFL is.

  • chived

    penis lol

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