Daily Morning Awesomeness (20 Photos)

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  • dude....

    I hav green jelloo on me. haaaaaaaaaaa

  • PaulyO

    #17 Mind if I use this the next time some D-bag parks like this in front of my place

  • hater

    Parent of the year. #22

    • Keith

      He really is tho. Cause he's actually playing with his kids and not beating/molesting them. The kid is fine and she was smiling, I'm sure he didn't expect her to go that high.

      • Wavien

        He didn't. You can see on his face right after she flies up that his face is like :O

      • Ron

        @Keith – He was a dumbass in the first place for even attempting that. It doesn't matter if he didn't expect the child to go that high. If the child would have landed the wrong way or off the mattress any more, she could have broken her neck. The parent needs to be investigated because that is child endangerment. This is what's wrong with the world, dumbasses like this and other dumbasses who think this is ok.

        • salverai

          oh holy shit i'd hate to be your kid. 'okay kids here is the slip and slide i promised you.. remember you can only slide objects on it. that picture on the box of the kid sliding on it is just showing you what NOT to do.". next your gonna say that kids who hit their parents in the nuts with a bat during baseball practice should be brought up on charges. F.

          • Ron

            No, that's not what I am saying at all. I would definitely let my child play on a slip and slide, play baseball, whatever. Accidents do happen. But THIS is reckless endangerment and an accident that is easily preventable.

            • Clif

              Ron, not gonna lie, its people like you that makes this world the way it is. When I was a kid I jumped out of trees, rode a bike without a helmet, and played f ing dodge ball during recess. Sure sometimes I broke my arm and got a concussion, but come on, kids these days are soft, let em live a little I say.

              • bman

                Well said, agreed. Child endangerment, really?

                "Umm…I'd like to report a case of child endangerment."
                "Go ahead, sir"
                "Ok, my neighbor is, like, playing with his kids in their room and they have a blow up mattress, and he is like jumping on it and making his daughter jump dangerously high."
                "We suggest you find a new hobby, sir. *click"

                • salverai

                  lmfao. best comment of the week.

              • Ron

                I agree with you. I think people are misconstruing what I am trying to say. When I was a kid I did those same things. I agree that we are making our kids soft these days. This however is reckless endangerment and the parent should know better. I guess it's no use trying to reason with the dumbasses that frequent this site though. At least I have a brain and know that this is wrong.

                • metalwest

                  I think it's less that people are misconstruing what you're saying and more that you're a douche.

                  • Ron

                    All of the dumbasses that condone this are douches. I said that I agree that we're making our kids soft these days. Do people not read? I said that I would let my child play on a slip and slide, play baseball, whatever. Accidents happen all of the time in any sort of environment BUT what this parent did is potentially creating an accident needlessly with an innocent child. It's one thing for a child to get hurt while playing on a slip and slide or playing in a tree but for a parent to do something to potentially inflict bodily harm on their child is sick and needs to be investigated. The parent didn't know how far the child would go (as evidenced by his face when it happened). He was scared and, if he's not a dumbass, wouldn't attempt it again because there was a serious risk that the child could have been paralyzed if they had fallen on their head or neck. I do not restrict my child from playing pretty much whatever she wants but I don't agree with what this idiot did.

                    • testington

                      you're an idiot Ron

                      "what this parent did is potentially creating an accident needlessly with an innocent child."

                      He jumped on a damn air mattress with the kid on it that is not child endangerment, that is playing and having fun with your kid. Should trampolines be outlawed?

                      Any sane person can see they were having fun. It's not like she is an infant, my guess is the SECOND this clip ended she said "do it again"

                    • Guest

                      My I remind you, Ron, that arguing on the internet is much like running the special olympics…even if you win…you're still "special" 😉

                    • lidalida

                      You're canceling out your own arguments here… The guy didn't mean for the kid to go that far. If he knew this could happen beforehand, he would not have done it. No need to investigate, this is not sick. You can see on the person holding the camera's reaction and his facial expression that they were worried. They're not going to do it again, because now they know that it is potentially dangerous. Which they didn't know beforehand. My point: No need to investigate. At all.

                    • Paula

                      Can we make a 'FUCK RON' post- it'll be filled with pussies and not the good kind.

                      Kisses,
                      Paula

        • kodakkid

          Ron shut up he was playing with his kids and you want to investigate i suppose she needed a helmet too you need to relax or are you one of those parents who put your kids in a bubble

        • its_forge

          You want some more kerosene to keep that fire in your hair going?

    • Zero

      Not surprised if this case will be investigated.

      • Guse

        Because the US has turned into a bunch of humorless twats?

        • Ron

          Zero, I agree with you. The people that condone this are a bunch of dumbasses. I have a child and would NEVER even think of doing something like this. This is just bad parenting, plain and simple.

      • Zebulon

        How about you investigate the fattest part of my ass?

        • dub

          Well that's easy… your nose.

    • Texican

      Whether the parent was reckless or not… THAT LOOKS LIKE SO MUCH FUN!!! I wish I was a kid again…

      • iAm1-NAMI

        let he who is without sin cast the first stone. He was playing , he made an error, but it ended well.

        but a man should never be in bed with his daughter that old. I There's a SERIOUS sexual impropriety going on here and that gif is borderline child porn! Do you know how many sick perverts are into "bouncing"?

        • Kai V

          ^^ that guy

  • BigDingo

    #20 I'd see that movie…

    • wintercoat

      Still probably be better than X3.

  • Schnell

    Tits or GTFO.

  • freakish_titi@hotmail.com

    #7 ROTFLMAO

  • Israeli_Rob

    #21 is understandable

  • lokiz

    #7 made me lol

    • cklwl

      i don't get it

      • fornicate

        then we're going to need a bigger boat…

    • COCO

      I do not understand the joke. Why is the fat girl acting like that?

    • andysniper

      duurnun duuurnun DUUURRRNNUN DUURNUNDURNUNDURNUNDURNUDNDUNRUDNRN

      OMNOMNOMNOMNOM

      • Jak

        I had that song in my head for #2 as well.

      • Jack Bauer

        I was thinking of the Friday song.

    • dub

      JAWS!

  • Stein

    #18 Ignorant atheist

    • IRock

      She was so sweet to send her prayers.

    • Wavien

      So you actually believe that if you pray enough, it'll help the now homeless people? Would pretty much be the same as praying for no hunger in the world, and believing there won't be anymore, since you prayed for it..

      • its_forge

        Couldn't fuckin' hurt, ya pathetic douche.

        • Wavien

          Rofl, I think it's you that's pathetic, not I. It's Sunday, go back to your church and pray to your big invisible friend.

        • Kai V

          Actually, doing nothing and telling people that you're praying does hinder the situation. If you would tell people to donate or volunteer, then you would be helping. Open your eyes please.

    • ReginaFilange

      Why ignorant? Celebrities benefiting from tragedy by trying to look all charitable, noble and spiritual, well, that IS ignorant.

    • http://alessandropreti.altervista.org Alessandro

      they are really worthless! If there is a god or something similar, he won't let these thing happen….

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/Benton-McGrath/587208531 Benton McGrath

        Well according to the Bible, he sent forty days and nights of rain and killed everyone on the planet except for a select few. So yes, he would let these things happen

        • PWNT

          Really? Is this the place for THIS argument?

          • Dude

            Let them have it, it's always fun to see people come up with the craziest arguements saying their belief is right

            • DaddyD

              But … but … MY belief is right, not theirs!

        • Kyle

          Your statement Benton supposes that the bible is of some particular value… I see your bible and raise you common sense

          • dub

            I see your common sense and raise you ONE BIBLE!

            Oh fuck I'm terrible at gambling.

          • metalwest

            No, his statement shows that you can believe that there is a god AND that he lets terrible things happen. Has nothing to do with the value of the bible.

      • its_forge

        'Cuz God wants everything to be sweetness and light and all of us to prance in sunny pastures HURK BARF ACK. I don't want a God that doesn't believe in thunderstorms and earthquakes. God is not BORING.

    • bud

      pray in one hand and shit in the other and tell me which one fills up first.

    • Mike

      Did he at least link the number to text to donate to the Red Cross? He has a lot of fans, if he could get them sending donations that would help.

    • jesUS

      Its awful for Japan but how bout we start praying or paying for our own…

      • dub

        Our own? Humanity is our own. Don't allow borders to favor one group of humans over another. They're just like you and I.

        • WideEyed

          Only with smaller penis'

        • its_forge

          ^^^ That. You think God sees any borders? Check out the view of Earth from space sometime. There aren't any dotted lines drawn around countries. We're Earthlings. Period.

    • P90

      Ignorant atheist, that's a contadiction in terms surely. Atheists tend to use proven science to explain things and not 'a big magic man did it'

      • Frank

        Not trying to get into this religious fight, but there is no such thing as "proven science." Everything is an accepted theory until something better comes along. The only thing aetheist ever try to prove anyways is that they are superior to people with faith.

        • Then STFU

          "I wish it would have gone without saying but you don't seem to shut up."

        • ...

          Exactly. Christians believe a book from 2,000 years ago. Which is obviously so much better than a fluid and dynamic knowledge base that is constantly being improved as new discoveries are found.

        • P90

          Mankind has always had questions such as why does a certain thing happen or how does a certain thing work, religion is just our ancestors way of explaining the unknown before humanity became advanced enough through scientific process to actually find out.

          • testington

            I am a Christian, but I thought that was really funny and pointed out the fact that celebrities are MILLIONAIRES and can do more to help with their money than their prayers. Clearly a publicity tweet, the little twat probably didn't even send it himself.

    • carlos

      why in the world are you guys trying to be righteous??? this the The Chive…..BTW She should sell her virginity online to raise money for the cause lol

    • RobBroad4th

      People tend to appreciate money more than words you say in your head.

    • Tyler

      How about sending prayers *and* money? Novel concept? I'm a Christian and do believe in prayer, but would never expect God to answer a prayer I'm not working on myself…

      • Jeebus

        Fuck that shit. God'll take care of it.

    • Lew

      Not so much and ignorant aethiest or an aggressive aethiest. In my experience most aethiest are way more aggressive with pushing their beliefs onto others and being intolerant of others beliefs than the average religious person.

    • Petey

      I'm Christian. I believe in God. I found this funny.
      The responder never said anything about whether or not God exists, and it doesn't matter if he is an atheist b/c he has a point. Praying for something doesn't make it happen. Just ask half of the guys in the U.S. on sundays in the fall. Justine Bieber, along w/ every other entertainment and sports star has enough money that if they all pitched in they could probably build houses, or if nothing else a few shelters, for the stranded people to live in for a while.
      But who knows, maybe Stein is in fact right. In which case I say we should all pray for Bieber to give all of his money to help those in Japan

    • ...

      "Two hands working can do more than a thousand clasped in prayer."

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Kris-Minda/1021640261 Kris Minda

      A Strain takes down Bieber. Bottom line. It's not about the fact that he's Atheist, it's about the fact that we, as a collective, hate Justine Bieber.

  • dean

    That's it i'm getting a water bed LOL #22

    • Ryno

      That's an air mattress.

  • concerned politician

    #18 he should help by cooling the reactor cells, with a bucket of water and an umbrella

  • PointBlank_

    #21 going to be me at the crack of noon…

  • anil507
    • inkh8r

      That looks incredibly stupid. That second boat trailing in the wake would kill anyone who falls off.

    • Joeyk

      "Becky's down, turn the boat around…"

    • dub

      I would pay to get to be the asshole that sideswipes everyone like dominoes.

      That is, if I didn't already have to pay to be part of this event.. I'm not made of money.

  • Wavien

    #5 That guy is ready for the zombie apocalypse

    • http://www.facebook.com/stefano.barilotti Stefano

      He can always say he SAW the enemy too close to shoot

      • Moby

        It would be even funnier if he had a SAW with a saw mounted on it.

        • http://www.facebook.com/stefano.barilotti Stefano

          Tears for Fears would say he's SAWing the seeds of love.

    • andysniper

      too much gears of war.

  • Broken Printer

    # 22 gets funnier the more i watch it… "here comes daddy!"

  • xXbeermonkeyXx

    #4 im coking my babies. im so proud, they look delicious

    • COCO

      That can clog your veins and increase your risk of heart disease.

    • carlos

      Recipe Please!!!

      • dub

        6 Turtles
        1 smoker.
        Bacon.

        Remove shell from turtles.. well you can figure it out.

        • testington

          I like turtles

  • ReginaFilange

    #10 #13 #22 Nominees to parent of the year.

    • Guse

      Let me know how the "kid bubble" works out for ya.

    • dub

      Yeah dude, I agree. I will be a good parent and provide my child with safe activities like television watching and video game playing.

      And also eating. Lots of eating. #22 wouldn't have been as dangerous had that starving little girl had another 100 or so pounds on her. THAT's the bad parenting… skinny non-obese kids. What's the world coming to?

  • jesus

    #19 holy derp

    • jjj

      vizsla's are awesome.

  • http://www.darkknightandjoekerr.webs.com JAMESJ

    #8
    Who's smoking pencils?

  • http://www.facebook.com/paul.w.musselman Paul Musselman

    #12 You have a right to kill me… but you do not have a right to judge me. Fucking awesome movie.

    • Unknown

      what movie was this?

      • http://www.facebook.com/paul.w.musselman Paul Musselman

        Apocalypse Now – Character is Colonel Walter Kurtz played by Marlon Brando.

        • Unknown

          Thanks.I've never seen it before but that quote is pretty bad ass.It makes me wanna watch it.

          • http://www.facebook.com/animal107 Shane Ellerthorpe

            It's a powerful movie. Makes you think…

            With that said… CHARLIE DON'T SURF!

      • CBRian1K

        Apocalypse Now. A famous movie adaptation of Heart of Darkness, a novella written by Joseph Conrad , which moves the story from the Congo to Vietnam and Cambodia during the Vietnam War. Read the book, watch the documentary.
        Profound stuff.

    • schango

      I love this movie more than life itself.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Hugo-Huey-Castaneda/682393187 Hugo 'Huey' Castaneda

    #22 – If a child laughs, everything is gravy.

    • Wolfram

      That one made me laugh. Looks ridiculous.

      • dub

        :: Everything is gravy.

    • eyeguy

      spoken like a Dad

  • http://www.facebook.com/alanwhitaker Alan Whitaker

    #18 vincent is the man

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Thomas-Narcisi/1818747017 Thomas Narcisi

    #7
    Daaa Nuhh
    Daaa Nuh

    Dun Dun Dun Dun Dun Dun…

    Everyone out of the Water!

    • AnonTheMouse

      Oh that's the song? Shit, I started listening to the music from Free Willy…

    • RobBroad4th

      Thanks for the help on that one. That "Friday" song has poisoned my brain and is playing on loop in my head all day.

  • Ken

    #7 Puff the Magic Dragon?

  • Maynard B.

    #5,#13- Good times baby…..good times

    • mrjimmyos

      #5 is an inspiration to us all

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