• Justin Tutterow

    I must be huntin' treasure, 'cause I'm diggin' yer chest!

  • tfbuckfutter

    I should warn you, I'm the incredibly jealous type. Like, right now for example, I want to stab in the face the last man to smell what is inside your panties.

    (You have to realize when reading this, that I am incredibly handsome and speak with a slight British accent…..yeah, tell me that one doesn't work)

  • Zach

    Wanna make a mistake?

  • Caleb

    Hi, I'm not a serial killer.

  • Bob

    I don't know if you know this, but my dick died…Mind if I bury it in your ass?

  • Jon

    You've been spending a lot of time in my dreams….. I'm here to collect the rent .

  • Don_Juan_Ramon

    If you were a booger I'd pick you first.

  • Huge

    You're ugly, but you intrigue me.

  • Babs McGulley

    I'm in duct tape and stun gun sales. Want some free samples….

  • Quint

    Oh. Raphael. Tell me more.

  • Kobie

    Roses are red
    violets are blue
    I have a gun
    Get in the van

  • Christian K

    If I asked you to have sex with me would the answer to that question be the same as the answer to this question??

  • Brian

    I know Im not the best looking guy here, but im the only one talking to you!

  • Jerry

    Put your hand near her face, to let her smell it. Then ask, " does this smell like chloroform?"

    • tfbuckfutter

      I don't think any chick will just smell your hand before you open the lines of communication.

  • thegoodnerd

    Lick your fingers, whipe it on her and simultaneously tugging at her shirt say "Lets get you out of those wet clothes"

  • Juan

    *offer to buy her a drink, she declines*
    *after I down my shot of Whiskey, bar tender asks if i'd like another*
    *decline, say I have to operate tomorrow*
    *gold digger is now interested, procedes to ask if I'm a doctor*

    some of you may know this from somewhere..

  • WirelessCable

    Some say I am the most interesting man in the world… and that I've climbed mount Everest blindfolded

  • poopstabber

    If I told you that you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me?- Joe Dirt

  • poopstabber

    Do you mind if I push in your stool?

  • MrDaddyMan

    Hi there. What's your name? (works every time!)

  • Drake

    I'm gonna be having sex with you tonight whether you're there or not, so you might as well come with me.

  • blah

    your so hot i would drag my nuts through a half mile of razor blades to hear you fart through a cheap walkie-talkie

  • Russell Turner

    I've got cable.

  • Russell Turner

    Motion for a girl to come over – when she does, lean in, and whisper "sweet nothings, sweet nothings, sweet nothings."

  • Russell Turner

    Hi,. I'm Russ. I can't hold an erection…can you?

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