Everything on the internet is true (30 photos)

  • John

    #16 Japan was an unavoidable natural disaster. 16,000 children a day fathered by sexually wreckless parents who cant feed themselves but still find time to have unprotected sex.

    Thats why we dont care.

    • Brad

      wait, we don't care about children dying in Africa or dogs being afraid of vacuums?

      it's not about sexually reckless parents, read a book. Part of it is that 50% of their children will die before they reach 5, so they have to have more kids to have a better shot that some make it to adulthood to be able to take care of the parents later in life. Also the women don't work outside of the home, so the opportunity cost (what they are giving up) to have more kids is low. And the women and men aren't educated so they don't know or even have access to birth control…

    • link

      5000 morons breeding and settling in a historically earthquake/tsunami prone area of the world. who can avoid distaster by simply packing up and leaving…..i can be an asshole too! =)

      • cwhoa

        congrats, you are an ignorant asshole

    • reality.

      what happened in Japan is population control compliments of mother nature.

      • IMHO

        What do you say about Africa, I wonder.

        • b-ry

          I've been all over that continent and its an amazing place.

    • b-ry

      take a trip to Africa, volunteer, see if first hand then post.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/HellHath-NoFury/100001225731219 HellHath NoFury

      Maybe you should live in Africa for awhile. You'd be having unprotected sex all the time, whether you wanted to or not. Families with baby girls used to move to my area because they were afraid their daughters would get raped in larger cities not run by missionaries and protected by police. One instance I remember very clearly, where several of the adolescent girls were allowed to walk to town by themselves, only two came back, both had been raped by men waiting on the road. They did not know what happened to the others.

      • Pete

        Ill give them money when they stop doing this shit to each other. Until then, let them come up with their own money to commit genocide with. I don't want that blood on my hands.

        • Vagina Jones

          Your logic: I wont give money to starving people, because some of them are rapist. So until they stopped getting raped, my conscience is clear that I didnt accidentally feed a rapist.

          • Pete

            A starving Rapist is still a Rapist.

            • IMHO

              Which starving police, genocidal government, or ambivalent observer (such as you) is most able to help, Pete? Obviously the "them" of the world are eager to meet your criteria for charity, a la "Ill give them money when they stop doing this shit to each other". Until then, carry-on with your life, and be happy. Please do ignore anything or "them" that is below you as they are not worthy of your mind-share or consideration.

              Oh, and this "them" don't need your money to commit genocide. Them just need your you to be vacant (in every sense), and you've got that covered, in spades.

              • Jim

                Actually, I give them a ridiculous amount of money via taxes/foreign aid. So I sleep easy at night, not guilty that I was born in an amazing place.

                The fact is, many places have taken that aid money and turned their locale 180 degrees into a wonderful place. Many others did the opposite. Why should we keep throwing money down those sinkholes to be used for even more evil?

                Afganistan was one of the worst countries to live in for the average person, see how well it goes over when you try to force a country to change? Everyone cries about the EVIL INVADING STATES!!! Not seeing how people are giving their lives to better others there. They just buy into the anti war sentiment.

                Giving money to the problem places in Africa, would be like giving money to the Taliban, and hoping things change and get better. Let them figure themselves out, they have to find what works for them and do it. Everyone else in the world did in their country, why is africa different?

              • Bill

                Oh, and this "them" don't need your money to commit genocide. Them just need your you to be vacant (in every sense), and you've got that covered, in spades.

                Right, how about they don't need fucking hippies trying to take away their guns so they have means to defend against a rampaging slaughtering army?

      • Ryno

        In a strange way I am glad to see you back HHNF! Just wasn't the same without you.

      • Always Last

        You need to do another wet shirt/braless post HHNF!

    • Apollos

      Africa is basically a complete shithole more on par with the untamed animal kingdom than with the civilized world. And before somebody calls me a racist…its their culture that is fucked up, not the color of their skin. And their culture IS fucked up…

      There are pockets of fucked up culture among all races.

      • John

        Apologies all, that was supposed to be 13, d'oh

      • db3300

        Africa is a shithole and it has nothing to do with race. You should stop apologizing to people who label you because you have an opinion. Screw them. People are going to call you a racist anyway. Look no further than the state of politics in the US where you get called a racist because you dare to disagree with certain political beliefs or politicians. It's a sad day when you have to preface everything you say with "Don't think I'm a racist but …". Don't let anyone define you.

        • Jim

          Awesome to the max.

    • You ignorant punk

      I will use small words so you can read this. the dying child doesn't know or care what kind of sex his/her parents had. they just know they're dying. Right now I'm sorry YOUR parents had unprotected sex.

      • lollercoaster

        here here

      • Guest commenter

        I'm afraid those words probably weren't small enough to get through. Valiant effort.

    • http://www.facebook.com/heberc Heber A. Coll

      The amount of thumbs up this ignorant bullshit has gotten tells me how many ignorant/racist/retarded people are in here. It's just sad.

      • name

        /b/ must be leaking

      • engine911

        So your throwing out the ignorant and racist card yet you have nothing to add to the conversation. Sort of like the pot calling the kettle black. Or is that to racist for your fragile sensibility. Rather then just demining people for having a conversation about the topic,. maybe add something intelligent to it if you are capable. Or are you going to just hide behind your inflaming remarks all your life.

      • shaka

        Wow, i didn't think it would take long for someone to play the race card….. jeeze get a fucking life

    • Jack

      Africa gets how much a year in foreign aid? And Japan how much?

    • Alex

      So I guess the answer is for African people to stop having sex. Because I'm pretty sure if they can't afford to buy food, they can't afford to buy condoms. So, Africans stop having sex, and eventually disappear. Then, No one in Africa will be hungry.

      • Phaedrus

        Now you're getting it! : )

      • topher

        Yes pretty much, there population is constantly growing anyway and if you can't afford to put food in your own mouth, then fucking pull out until you can!

      • TIm

        No, It's not that they cant buy condoms. They are given them all the time.


        • Ewww

          And it definitely has nothing to do with the Pope telling them that condoms are useless or even harmful to their health. I think that this is a situation of ignorance as much as anything. What is with this virulent hatred toward Africa? A lot of people are suffering, and you're mad at them?

    • MacNCheesePro

      Between this and the argument over how cool it is to be wasted vs drunk vs designated driver in another gallery, I think everyone should keep their opinions to themselves and just try to come up with the cutest one liner we can for our favorite picture!

      • smallchinaman

        Agreed! No ones mind was ever changed by a post on the internet. If you really want to help, quit posting your political/religious/race/etc rants so I don't have to read so much trying to find aforementioned one liners.

    • TxsMoe

      No one cares because nothing can fix Africa. Every part of it I have ever been to is hopeless despair. It's a culture thing. There will always be places like this because there will always be people; and people have the ability to suck. Blame it on whatever you want, but facts are facts. Look at Rome 2000 years ago. Civilized and advanced; bulding edifices that last thousnads of years and lending incredible advancements to science, math and technology. Look at Africa today. One big pile of shit.
      How long should we care? How long should we offer help and throw money to them?
      And 16,000 kids a day die of starvation? Bullshit.

      • Triathlon Rose

        Thousands die in Africa every day because international corporations that profit western nations exploit them through labour, resources and work zones we would not tolerate here.
        Since colonialism and slavery wrecked African nations, they have been subjected to imperialist domination, economic and cultural.
        Tensions between tribes were played upon by european countries, who by empowering one group over another could more easily control the population. This is why civil wars are so rampant. Corruption is plaguing these nations because men from militia who know nothing else are allowed to get away with violence, murder and genocide as our governments turn a blind eye. How are people expected to fight against corrupt officials with no resources?
        Birth control is neither taught nor available, and lack of internal structures such as good housing and sewage control leads to massive amounts of disease.

        • Triathlon Rose

          The amount we spend in aid, compared to the amount of money poured into our economy from companies that continue to exploit the poorer nations we send money to, make it a currently never-ending loop, one that we continue to get rich from.
          African countries do not have an innate 'cultural problem' that causes them to self-destruct in this way. We are the reason these countires are floundering, and we need to be a part of the solution.

          Some of the comments I have read here make me ashamed of humanity. Frankly, I thought most Chivers were way better than that

          Get educated for F*ck's sake

    • dcon

      wow. That's cold. HOW do you live with yourself?

      • Earl

        Sleeping in bed, knowing my whole life money has been flowing to them, yet they are still doing shit to each others a tribe of baboons would think is savage.

    • Phaedrus

      Amen John. Spot on. 100% correct.

    • Kyle Retrato

      Yeah but look at this toaster. It cooks eggs too.

    • chyeaaaaa

      That's the most over simplified, ignorant, polarizing take on the issue that I've ever seen. And I think you actually believe it. And worse, you're actually angry when people say otherwise. Jesus Christ why does this have upvotes?

    • Petey

      really? thats why you think children die in Africa? i guess it has nothing to do w/ the fact that an incredible amount of Africans haven't been educated, disease runs wild, living conditions are terrible, and it's just an all around unhealthly place to live. no it must be b/c of irresponsible parents

    • Kagetid

      Most of Africa is a hostile environment naturally not helping those in Africa. Corrupt governments keep the people down. Africa is poor and nothing is going to change that right now. But you can help for free at
      ——&gt ;http://www.thehungersite.com/clickToGive/home.faces?siteId=1<——- if you care

      Japan on the other hand is a well functioning country hit by disaster. There are given millions to Africa every day but this is the first time in years Japan has asked for help. Its not that no one cares but you cant keep spamming news with the ongoing hunger/disease problem in Africa.

      • DumbAssDave

        I get the feeling that everyone in this argument believes that Africa is a country…..just sayin….


    • Entertained

      Whatever, here is proof that these numbers are so inflated.


      When you look at it, the world is a much more dangerous place to be these days.
      For instance, there's people dying today that have never died before.

    • Ewww

      What is with this virulent hatred toward Africa? A lot of people are suffering, and you're mad at them for it? And really, chivers, I thought we were supposed to be generous, good people. Reading these comments makes me sad. Whether you want to call it racism or not, there is some serious hatred going on in these posts, and that's not cool.

    • lfgd1978

      They don't know any better my friend……. they have being kept in ignorance and poverty by the rest of the world and themselves so stop being all high and mighty and start being at least sympathetic to other peoples suffering.


    #10 so true

    • Brad

      why don't you shut up? Nobody care what you think, fatty! Eat a turd!

      • Brad

        so the people giving me minuses don't understand the concept of sarcasm? the post says "so true" about anonymous internet cruelty? hello, is this mike on…?

        • ROK247

          ever tell a joke that went over your own head? lol

    • DCMOFO

      Agreed. Suck a fuck ass bag!

      • fool

        how does one suck a fuck?

        • SkillNye

          sexilly, with the lips.

    • Julien

      so is #25

  • nemesis

    #4 wins imo

    • nemesis

      Well that's bullshit. A few minutes ago, number 4 was an image of a doctor holding a baby upside down by the feet and the other doctor holding a branding iron with a Christian "fish" on it, with the caption "let your kids get their own problems".

      Le sigh.

  • Urban

    #2 I wish my girl would dress like this in bed.

    • GuEst


    • doublemeat

      Does not compute. Have you asked her to? If you've asked and she didn't, it's time to find a new girlfriend.

    • jimbo

      She does when she's at my house.

      • Urban

        You bltch. What's your secret?

        • DaddyD

          The length of my dick and my skill with my tongue.

        • DaddyD

          I have a 2 inch dick. Pity I suppose

        • Jimbo

          No secret, I just ask, and she does.

    • Guest

      well, my girl is fine in her pidjamas, as for my wife I prefer when she sleeps naked

  • Mat



    • https://www.facebook.com/nzalog Norbert Zalog

      Me too… #26 is as far as it gets.

  • hockey dude 11

    No comment

  • Brad

    #18 Do use the Macro setting on your digital camera

  • Anakrusix

    #3 Damn right!

  • Eric

    #13. Africa, Crank out some quality stuff for our consumer culture to have and we might care a bit.

    • anonymous

      There is a reason why there is no quality consumer stuff coming from africa. most of the quality stuff goes towards the defense industry, and the rest of the stuff is classified.

      • greg

        what about natural ressources, a##hole?

    • WTF

      They crank out slaves, but we don't use them anymore…………

      • http://www.facebook.com/Managua.Green Miguel Ruvalcaba

        Too soon.

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/HellHath-NoFury/100001225731219 HellHath NoFury

        Speak for yourself.

    • pmofmalasia

      Um, Vuvuzelas?

  • Oasis

    #16 Is it cruel that I mess with the cat with the vacuum? Funny as hell, though.

    • fool

      absolutely not. cats are assholes. they deserve that.

  • Poppin Fresh

    #7 That about sums it up for me…
    #8 LOL! awesome.

  • Papichulo361

    ….. sorry, I was blinded! What did it say?

  • DistractedIndividual

    #4 is sad but true….I decided to finally listen to it yesterday (To see what everyone was making fun of) my ears melted off my face, burned a hole in the floor and created a black hole under my house. I regret my curiosity…but at least I still have the Chive to make up for it….:)

  • http://jagassery.com/blog/ jaguar1024


    Yeah but starving children aren't the ones making super big tit JAV porn, tentacle porn, and super violent anime………….priorities man, priorities.

  • bigdeal

    the will smith one sucked. i cant stand him and dont give a fuck what he thinks. go worship hubbard you freak!

    • charles

      this coming from the guy who wears a white hood over his head to feel "important" along with his other Klan buddies. stay classy bigdeal.

      • bryanbarbeau

        Oh yea, Charles, I TOTALLY see the racism there. Bigdeal doesn't like Will Smith, Will Smith is black, therefore, bigdeal MUST be racist. CONCLUSION: Any non black person who does not like a black person is a racist. LOGICAL CONCLUSION: Charles is an 1d10t

      • V4Vendetta14

        So anybody who things Will Smith is an overrated actor is a racist? I think Denzel is a gifted actor, and I'd put him in the top 5 American actors.

        Nothing more obnoxious than an actor earning tens of millions a year to give life advice. Did Jazzy Jeff ignore his profound advice when they were partners?

  • Wyatt

    "i promise if elected…."

    • Wyatt


    • kodakkid

      I'll pull out

  • Hehe! That tickled!

    #21 = AWESOME.

    • flux incapacitated

      Plz explain -do not get 😦

      • bfcknrzl

        I do not get it either.

    • The_BOFH

      This was an awesome effort. I applaud the original creator.

    • james

      the last one should have been the train tho lol

    • Jay Cue

      FAN FRICKIN TASIC!!!! It symbolizes all the charcters and how the Delorean looked everytime they time traveled!

  • Royals

    So true…

    • lol

      So true…

  • Troll of Truth

    #13 Get a job.

  • Royals

    #15 I'm a medium well kinda guy

    • iheartbeef

      and yet, they always get it wrong

    • jimbo

      I'm all about the pink in the middle

      • engine911

        I see what you did there Jimbo, and I applaud you.

        • http://theanisette.com Daris

          Dude, Jimbos on fire today.

    • Baker

      I don't know. In Florida I feel like our medium rare is closer to the pictured rare and our medium is definitely more pink then the one pictured. Also whatever cut of steak they used for those pictures looks terrible.

    • fsdc

      What does your husband order?

  • Poppin Fresh

    people need to stop making themselves feel better about feeling ambivalent towards one tragedy by comparing to another one that is being ignored.

    • dub

      Do they? Do people need to stop doing that?

      Thanks for the random opinion without those pesky reasons, convictions, or purposes.

      • Poppin Fresh

        Yes they do. They need to stop making dick-ish unsympathetic comments about something they can't possibly understand or relate to. This is not a fucking contest. The higher death count does not win. They are both horrible things that deserve attention from people who actually care and not criticism from fat nerds like yourself sitting behind a computer screen in your comfortable chair never having experienced anything more misfortunate than dying too many times in WoW. Have your house and entire town and family swept away by a tsunami and then tell me you don't care, asshole.

        • lol

          So true…
          How do you know he's never had anything bad happen though… maybe, just work with me here, but maybe his whole family died in a fire…. well then, sir, you would be the asshole, wouldn't you?

  • Kris


    … so says a scientologist.

    • DNA

      Yeah! Totally Just another Crazy Hollywood Sciencetologist!

    • Tim

      Who cares who he is/what he believes? What he actually said is what's important. Take issues with that, not the source.

      • Kris

        A Scietologist is talking about God… that's just a bit contradictory, don't ya think, Tim?

  • Chiefs420

    #3 #11

    We're quoting something called Kid Cudi and Will Smith now like they're fucking Ghandi? What. The. Fuck.

  • http://twitter.com/anewsnolin1 @anewsnolin1
  • Dan

    #26 cool grammar bro

    • Uppers

      and what would you suggest?

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