Daily Afternoon Randomness (48 Photos)

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  • Chase

    Well that was fun…!

    • Groober

      … she said walking out of my apartment.

    • Donovanovich

      … said your mom as I gave her a pat on the ass and sent her home.

    • Brrrrrrrrrrravo

      … said Wile E Coyote, picking feathers out of his teeth.

    • Kaboom

      … said Paula, cruising on the river Styx, after a visit from Seal Team Six.

    • Haaaaaaamburger

      … said Whitney, after her mugshot was displayed for millions of people to see online.

    • Phone

      … said Bill Clinton after being an honored guest at the first annual combined Intern and Cigar Affocionado convention.

    • snowbird

      … said the Chicago Cubs as they got their ass kicked by the Cardinals this week. Fuck you Cubs.

    • Cal

      Said two hipsters after watching Rent.

    • Group

      ..said Phone after using that joke in 1998.

    • Jason

      Said me after taking that monster shit two minutes ago!

    • equalizermax

      Said by them #41

  • Morgan Freeman

    What ever happened to HHNF???

    • oh4fuckssake

      She started banging that douche waffle Beau…… and then disappeared.

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/HellHath-NoFury/100001225731219 HellHath NoFury

        *herf* Not every female is banging every male she meets. We're not all your mom.

      • http://www.facebook.com/beau87 Beau Young

        Who she's banging isn't anyone's business but her's. She's still living in the continental united states, and she didn't disappear anywhere. The chive was just removing all of her comments so she stopped commenting on anything.

        • hMMMM

          So they started removing her comments, and she's STILL back? Bitch can't take a hint!

    • Captain Obvious

      she moved to Hawaii and got married or something like that.

      • Kim

        Ha, so she really was just an up tight chick that needed a good stuffing….

        • db3300

          Yes, Kim, because once people get laid and move to Hawaii, there is no more internet for them. It's the law.

          • http://www.facebook.com/people/HellHath-NoFury/100001225731219 HellHath NoFury

            This^

            • YupYupYup

              FACEBOOK?!?!? You're better than that.

    • todd

      Good question…

    • SugarTits

      Who gives a shit? Though, I did enjoy her very marginally more than Paula, and that's a BIG compliment.

      • ...

        theres no quiting the chive… shes just anon or more likely actually paula, they do have similar humor.

      • hMMMM

        I think Paula blows HHNF out of the water, just judging by sheer entertainment value.

    • Hava Nagila

      She finally became the man she always wanted to be and now posts as Brother Maynard

    • Bumba Claat

      Clicked her heels three times and wound up…. oh never mind…. she had water thrown on her and melted.

    • Cops

      Arrested for being a public nuisance.

    • Kabuki

      Joined the rest of the herd and headed east to greener pastures.

    • hmmm

      She turned into Paula

      • Beau

        Actually she got pregnant and grew up and decided that there are more important things in life than posting on the chive.

        • Douche

          Is that why she was posting here just last week?

        • http://www.facebook.com/beau87 Beau Young

          Douche waffle speaking. She stopped posting here because every time she posted something it got deleted by the chive, even though everything she was posting was neutral and not offensive in any way. Who knows how many of her replies to this are going to get deleted.

          • McBeastie

            If only it was all of them.

            • http://www.facebook.com/people/HellHath-NoFury/100001225731219 HellHath NoFury

              If only it 'were' all the comments with shitty grammar and spelling.

        • http://www.facebook.com/people/HellHath-NoFury/100001225731219 HellHath NoFury

          Laughable.

      • hMMMM

        Get off my name

    • Nickincollege

      I'm saying…

    • F-oo

      Super awkward.. people talking about my sister again.. Also, It occurred to me that I never ever look at anyone's responses to my posts.

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/HellHath-NoFury/100001225731219 HellHath NoFury

        Hey sis. Thanks for, you know, negating any of this, you dork. *best sister ever*
        No, I did not move to Hawaii, obviously. I was there for a few weeks over Christmas break with a friend and my daughter. I am also not copulating with anyone, so therefore, cannot possibly be pregnant. I am, however, living with Beau. I am not in a relationship. I am not dead (much to the dismay of the general populous) and have not surmounted an army of cats or gotten fat. Just busy being a mom and having a life.

        • YupYupYup

          Enjoy the mom thing; it ends too soon. Post back when the urge strikes.

      • http://www.facebook.com/beau87 Beau Young

        Yeah, people are pretty stupid on here sometimes.

  • gutter butbber

    chive on

  • RufioRufioRuFi

    #15, I don't believe you. You need to submit more proof.

    Also, Patty, only 8 pounds to go for a naked Whitney? Not that I'm counting.. #4

    • Chris_Mason

      Have there been any nsfw links yet?

    • Walter Sobchak

      Anyone know if this is a guy or not?

  • trent

    yeah gary

  • Chris_Mason

    #27 I can deal with it.

    • El BrandO

      Agreed

    • http://www.myspace.com/theamericanmaniacs BentWrenches

      FLBP + GAP,what duckface,don't see it #27

      • Sid

        I agree, what is this about a what?

      • TeamAmerica

        That duckface is perfect to come on
        She has FLBP. Many great areas to come on

    • Dan

      I say no, but I invite the Chive to keep trying!

    • TCUchiver

      I didnt even really see the one yesterday either

    • craigarlen

      You know how I know you're gay?

      • WTF

        'cause you thought his dick tasted like shit?

    • GK-4

      Fuck It, I have no problem with Either Girl

    • Dazilla

      MOAR!!!

    • :(

      I miss back when The Chive discouraged the duckface… i thought they had a good thing going…

    • the blue people

      hardly a duckface. i think she'll do

    • grrregg

      A big thumbs up on that!

    • sean

      She has a Face?

  • KCJake

    If only #3 were true. I could really go for a mass exodus of hipsters.

    • Firefighter23

      Does that mean there's a hipster Green Lantern too?
      Fuck I let my nerd out

    • equalizermax

      He should meet-up with Patty #4

    • gonta

      gravity is so mainstream

  • Royce

    #13 McDonald's girl is way worse.

    • AdWin

      In either case, it looks like their marketing team knew what they were doing. Not only are they on your mind but here you are spreading the word like wildfire.

      • Adam

        I think the advertisers have been successful.

      • http://twitter.com/dalton_matt @dalton_matt

        Right, screw "sex sells" now its "making the audience want to punch our spokespeople in the face sells" On a related note, don't hit women.

    • bumblefish1985

      I think that the Esurance girl and the Metamucil girl are one in the same. I hope she drinks to much fiber, bursts her colon and dies of septic shock. And I dont care if thats mean, she sucks.

      • Roscoe

        I believe you are correct, sir.

    • greazzlybear

      Flo from the Progressive commercials is the worst

      • mark

        Amen.

    • JimmyJohn

      who the fuck watches the commercials??

    • YupYupYup

      And your volume control is broken? or are you to stinkin stu-pid to walk away from what annoys you.

  • neefgeefd

    #44
    story of my life right now

    • http://twitter.com/yorickleusink @yorickleusink

      good thing we have the chive!

    • wants_life_back

      same story here!!

    • Darksoul

      Man after my own heart.

  • Finster172

    #3 "…but you probably never heard of it."

    • FinsterisaFAG

      fuck off, Finster. You're a FAGGOT and no one likes you. GTFO!

      • Red

        agreed.

      • Finster172

        Wait, so who's gay?

    • Nickincollege

      As I scroll down, reading the comments on this page, this is the funniest comment I have seen yet.

  • RangerW

    #47 either CGI or a really intense amount of photoshop. No dice!

    • ROK247

      probably didnt need the photoshopping in the first place

    • Tankus

      Her butt checks are not even on this picture… one's bigger than the other!

      • obi too
        • its_forge

          So in other words, not really all that photoshopped,… but we don't know how much plastic surgery was involved in bringing us this person as she appears now.

    • obi too
    • barnone

      Natalia Vélez – google it…its real

  • Simba

    BEST Kegstand EVER. #40

    • Slappy

      Best photobomb ever

      • mark

        "Yeah, she's okay."

    • badgerchiver

      On wisconsin!

      • working_donkey

        Keg stands are better in 'Sconnie – #40

    • BOCO KID

      FIND HER!! MOAR!!!

    • http://www.facebook.com/crivitzchris Chris Lesperance

      That's how we Wisconsinites do it!!!

    • Behzo

      "Frank the tank" in the background…

    • grrregg

      That's the girl to marry

  • Lester

    #8 was the toronto slutwalk.
    Google it.

    • Brent Verwymeren

      slutwalk started in Toronto, but it's caught on in many cities across North America…this January a Toronto cop made a comment on the topic of females being rape and victims of sexual assault saying "Women should avoid dressing like sluts in order not to be victimized"

      the event is to spread awareness that the people who are victimized by sexual assault are not the ones at fault or take some of the blame for how she might have dressed.

    • Hater_Aid

      Yeah, this slutwalk isn't as cool as I thought it would be.

      This lame event was about rape-victim's right to wear whatever they want and not be called sluts….

      • Nodootabootit

        Douche

      • TinFoilHatSoldier

        Absolute Douche.

    • llano2

      They are starting one in Australia.

    • zoomum3

      There is also one scheduled for London England and one in the states (Boston I think).

    • calgary_chiver

      I was guessing Ottawa….looks like Parliament in the background
      woohoo for Canadian sluts!!

    • Warlock

      that was Ottawa, look at the back ground….it started in T.

  • fozzie66

    #47 make it in 3D!

  • marschie

    CHIVE ON!

  • jroc

    #8 Toronto?

    • Adam

      that's not toronto

    • KimiD

      Ottawa…Parliament Buildings.
      They're protesting a Toronto Police Officers remarks regarding the way some women dress and how they are inviting sexual assault.

      • Tom

        It was a stupid comment to make, telling women not to dress like sluts.

        However, when traveling or clubbing don't flash your cash. Don't leave your keys in your car when you run into a store. Don't tempt criminals.

        If you do tempt a criminal and become a victim, it's still not YOUR fault. But if you can reduce the chance of it happening to you, why not do that.

        On the other hand I am all for scantily clad ladies in the bars, but I do understand the officers sentiment.

        • its_forge

          Nuns get raped, dude.

          • Hater_Aid

            Nuns are sluts.

            • its_forge

              ::edges away from you as stormclouds form over your head::

              Sure but they dress from head to toe in grey white and black wool, and short skirts and torn stockings are sorta off the menu. But they still get raped. That would be the point.

      • Benji07

        Actually it's the Ontario Legislature in Toronto.

    • jayman

      called a slut walk…google it. i so support their cause…

    • Yojimbo

      yep! thats the pro-prostitution protest by queens park

  • hueyrocks

    #43 – I joined the wrong branch of the military.

    • USAF

      Haha…Sucka!

    • wkdfrog

      Catering core?

      • USAFA_Cadet915

        Hell yeah u did

    • Anaughtybear

      Of course the Air force chick has her chin strap undone. That's like wearing one boot in the Army.

  • Royce

    #23 No I'm sorry sir, your insurance does not cover spontaneous combustino of the vehicle… But we just got this new one in stock! Will that be cash or check?

    • equalizermax

      I think I heard that news, that's in the Philippines ???

    • Your Face

      Topgear (the real UK one) said those 599s light up

    • http://twitter.com/dalton_matt @dalton_matt

      Kinda wishing you didn't avoid Esurance girl now, huh?

  • HelloAwesome

    Can you milk me, Greg?

    #27

    • grrregg

      Okay. Dreams do come true.

  • Will Smith

    #44 on that break right now

    • Tommy LJ

      School of hard knocks, or just repeating the MIB basic training?

  • Pokey_McPoke

    #47 Dat ass won't quit! QUIT!!! Nope, didn't work.

  • theeemightybuck

    #33 bordy barn is fucking fun!!!

    • LawnGuyLaandMan

      impossible to go there without running into every idiot you went to highschool with, except that there, they are your best friends.

  • Trollface

    YUM YUM YUM!

    #26

  • Mike

    #15

    prove it

    • JackyCracky

      Looks like a buttcrack to me.

      • its_forge

        ^^^ This. It's a butt. Probably a man's butt.

        • dea9

          Two bald heads.

    • WoogyMonster

      Two shaved knees.

  • RatedR401

    #6 All I can hear is Homer "ahhhhhhhh" *drools*

    • putzco

      I really hope this came from one of the "awesomeness" posts

    • JContre

      It's missing the Chives!

    • crea12

      TrainWreck Fries at Virgils NYC

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