Dogs lower blood pressure, cats lower your chance of getting laid (26 photos)

Hi Mr McManis!

  • Why

    What the fuck does this have to do with Paris Hilton?

    • Terry Burke

      it has nothing to do with her because she's ugly and an idiot

      • Bob

        and is infested with ghonosyphaherpeAIDs

  • Terry Burke

    "Dogs lower blood pressure, cats lower your chance of getting laid" that being said why do you guys insist on posting "cat saturdays"?

    • ZombieBootParty

      I flppin' H8 cats!!!!

      • Bob

        b/c bitches love cats.

      • Jimmy

        Bloody cats

    • Zach

      Cat Saturday…what a waste of a good post.

      • Terry Burke

        yeah, it was fine at first. but now i'm getting sick of it. i try not complain about posts i don't like on the chive, i just don't look at them. but the internet doesn't need more cat stuff, it already had to much

        • douche

          you talk alot. stfu

          • BentWrenches

            agreed shut up terry.maybe try some decaf..

            • Ron

              i love cats. and I love cat saturdays

  • mipo2010

    He gives not a single f*ck on this day…#9

  • TheFlintSkinny

    #13 Arnold Schwarzenegger and Danny Devito are finally filming Twins 2!

    • Mito

      Then shouldn't Arnold be neutered too?

  • NYAN

    "Dogs lower blood pressure, cats lower your chance of getting laid" – LIES. I have a cat and I get laid all the time! This is anti-cat propaganda perpetuated by dogs, and I will not stand for it.

    • Terry Burke

      cats suck

    • NYAN's Cat

      They meant laid by WOMEN, not sticken it to me every chance you get.

      • hMMMM

        LOL! Just going by life experience, there are more people allergic to cats than dogs, so your chances of getting laid are already diminished.

    • Sizzle

      It doesn't count when you're getting laid by other dudes.

      • ThatGuy

        Yeah it does. If you're gay and get a nice catch you can brag about it.

    • NYAN

      People who own dogs are in need of company and attention, and someone constantly wanting to be around them, because women aren't. Cats don't give a fuck and do what they want. People who have them are independent and confident, the kind of men that women want to be around, not a mama's boy who misses his mom and replaces her care and attention with an animal.

      • Sizzle

        And cat owners throw the same argument out all the time and get super pissed if you JOKINGLY make fun of cat ownership. U MAD bro?

      • Terry Burke

        judging by the fact most people are disagreeing with you, me thinks you are wrong

        • EWTH

          damn you need to shut up.

    • Gern Blansten

      Yeah, so take note that Cat Lady is considered a BAD thing.

      And there is no such term as Dog Lady.

      • Jen

        dudes with cats are weird.

      • TEWH

        'cause it's such a compliment to refer to a woman as "a dog", amirite?

    • Vive

      Guys with cats are hot as hell 😉

    • 4SOC20saint

      excuse the fuck out of me for wanting the animal i feed and take care of to actually give a fuck and show some appreciation if i want something that doesn't give a shit and scratches me for no reason all the time i will get a cactus…at least they dont make the whole house smell like piss

      • Malkintosh22

        "excuse the fuck out of me" I laughed.

      • NYAN

        Awww, you want someone to give you love and attention, and since women won't you got a dog. There there buddy, it will be ok. You did your best.

        • ThatGuy

          Protip: women love dogs. Next time you meet a girl because she stops to pet your cat at the cat park, I might consider your argument.

          • NYAN

            Protip: women love dogs, at the dog park. The last thing a woman wants is to have dog hair and slobber all over her clothes the next morning. Have fun in the friend zone at the dog park while have sex with her later.

            • NYAN

              *while I

            • ThatGuy

              My experience begs to differ.

    • ThatGuy

      If you want cats go back to /b/.

      • Here

        I have a cat… and a medical degree. Which holds more power over women?

        • Warren Buffet

          just had to throw the "medical degree" in there, huh? A truly successful person (like myself) doesn't need to announce his achievements.

          • bigdeal

            yessir mr buffet!! just set these anywhere?

  • V4Vendetta14

    #23, Awwww, Puglettes!!!

  • McBeastie

    Stray dog wandering the street coming toward me = very high blood pressure
    Stray cat wandering the street coming toward me = here kitty, kitty, kitty

    • Larry

      Translation: "I'm a pussy."

      • Coldzilla

        LOL Well done!

      • McBeastie

        Just had a story here of a guy who had his arm ripped off by stray pit bulls. I'm fine with being a pussy if I get to keep my arms.

        • ThatGuy

          I'm sure he wasn't asking for it all. And most dogs wouldn't do that either way. Stop making excuses and just man the fuck up.

    • Mito

      Until the dog licks you to death and the cat jumps up and rips out your larynx.

  • Simon Vega

    Come on Chive, you love cats and you know it… And you post something with a title like that? Kinda contradictory.. Just sayin'..

  • The Bandit

    #6 #10 …I see what you did there…the resemblance is remarkable! Snoop FTW!
    #7 #12 #20 …I want I want I want!

    …thanks Chive for posting dogs….finally…I love dogs!

    • HUH?

      yummy yummy yummy doh! brain freeze!!

  • Big Red 1

    That thing that the chive got as their mascot isn't even a dog, its a purse toy that some bitch would carry around.

    Get a real dog, chive.

    • ThatGuy

      Dogs make great pets regardless of their size asshole. It just depends on individual circumstances and interests. Stop being a dick.

  • Guest commenter

    #14 Would have me laughing my ass off if I saw it in person, just like it did in this post.

  • Ace Rimmer

    The one on the left is like: "Was up baby?"

  • _Moose_

    Bow wow wow yippy yo yippy yay
    The sounds of a dog brings me to another day


    • amrith777

      I have been listening to The Chronic album lately again–nine-deuce…Good times!!
      On another note–is Snoop sporting a Mudkip hat here?If so–that is off the chain!! B)

    • jetrome

      This dogg is expensive to upkeep. Only drinks malt liquer and smokes a LOT of weed.

  • xXbeermonkeyXx

    #10 brains freeze! brain freeze!! aaaaaaaaaaahhh!
    #24 nothing like going to the pub for a pint of lager to get away from the wife and kids

  • ImpressMe

    #5 cracked me up…..and Bellabear is too frickin cute….. thanks for the smile…its been a crap day…

    • amrith777

      I'm sorry to hear it's been a crap day–mine's kinda sucked,too–but the Chive always delivers!

  • EdWood

    Your arguement is invalid!

  • Intensemasterdebater

    #16 Give me my nuts back and I'll stop doing shit like this..

    • ThatGuy

      Sexuality doesn't function in dogs like it does in humans, apes and whales. They don't get erotic pleasure out of it, its more like an itch that they have to scratch. If anything castration is probably something of a relief to them, not the lifestyle ruining blow it would be to us.

  • bkfrijoles

    #15 good dog

  • yummymommy

    #19 so mean but omg soooo funny!!!

    • Mike

      Mean or not, I laugh everytime I see this one. 😀

    • BentWrenches

      me too

    • ThatGuy

      The dog deserves it for getting his dog's ears cropped.

  • Toby

    #8 This girl looks like she is no stranger to a jar f peanut butter.

  • ssstoopid

    #17 spoiled and overfed… Definitely not a man's dog. Take that dog for a jog and it will be much happier.

    • Baggins

      Who are you the fuckin' dog whisperer?

    • JAS

      spoiled and overfed is the definition of a man's dog. Men don't care about what their dog looks like, they just want their dog to be happy.

      • Jimbo

        really? then you're as manly as my 70 year old JAP grandmother.

      • ssstoopid

        I'm a man who takes care of his fuckin dog!

      • ssstoopid

        I did pick the wrong picture tho. Meant to pick the one with all the walls ripped up.

  • jim

    no you're not.

  • That Guy

    #18 no way that's real. but no really it's a fake dog. and
    #25 the fox looks like it has human eyes. erie.

  • Tony


    "I told you I'm not taking a freakin' bath!!!"

  • Backslash

    I want #7 and #20 right now……..

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