Daily Morning Awesomeness (20 Photos)

  • Homer

    Awesome, yes. Morning, no. Midnight here.

    • Tropsmurf

      DMA is DAR here in Australia…DAR is DMA, upside down but still fantastic

    • Bence Béky

      Morning in Hungary

      • Chiveinator

        hungry in Morning

        • That Douche

          in morning hungry…too far?

  • hater

    #14. Baby…Ruth!

    • comment

      It's a picture of Paula! Ahhhhhhh!

      Make it go away, please. Ban it from the board. Drive a stake through it's cold, dark heart.

      For the love of all that is Chivery, make it go away.

      • EWTHT

        *sigh* trying wayyy too hard.

  • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

    Go on, go on, go on, go on, yeah, go on…
    not first…
    Just a little more, go on, go on, gooooo…
    not second…..
    Yes! Yes! Yes!Yes!yesyesyesssssss…..

    THHHHIIIIRRRRRDDDDDDDDDddddd d d d d!!!!1!!

    Aahhhhh…. I just came on the inside of your monitor!
    And you can't wipe that off bitch!

    – was it as good for you as it was for me?

    • That Douche


    • Guest

      Yes. Yes it was. Seconds?

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        Only if we're doing thirds after, I hate ending up in a tie.

        – you know the drill

        • Guest

          Then there's no end in sight…

    • Nope

      Shut the fuck up

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_


    • amrith777

      *huge evil grin* If only I still smoked….

    • RIPP

      Can we just ignore this person now? Puh-leeeze?

  • gefundigeliebe

    The women-go-to-kitchen thing is just not funny. Enough already. #10

    • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

      Why are you behind the computer again? Go back to where you belong bitch!

      – the one you love to hate

      • Cyberfunker

        Paula…that is the nicest thing you ever said…now, go to the kitchen with the others BITCH!

        • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

          I don't have a kitchen, I eat everything unprepared BITCH!

          – the one you love to hate

          • Netoward

            "I eat everything unprepared BITCH!"
            so… we have a problem here, it could be:
            1. I eat everything, unprepared BITCH!
            2. I eat everything unprepared, BITCH!
            or you could just eat everything that is unprepared and bitch

            take that and return to the kitchen, misspelled troll !

            • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

              It's #2 (no, not that Space Invaders traffic light). Oh and I do bitch all the time so that's true too.

              – the one you love to hate

              • BITCH

                it was #1 not ,no not mly rittle plony,I totally did not expect that!

            • Christian Lander

              Stuff White People Like # 99, Grammar

              White people love rules. It explains why so they get upset when people cut in line, why they tip so religiously and why they become lawyers. But without a doubt, the rule system that white people love the most is grammar. It is in their blood not only to use perfect grammar but also to spend significant portions of time pointing out the errors of others.

              When asking someone about their biggest annoyances in life, you might expect responses like “hunger,” “being poor,” or “getting shot.” If you ask a white person, the most common response will likely be “people who use ‘their’ when they mean ‘there.’ Maybe comma splices, I’m not sure but it’s definitely one of the two.”

              If you wish to gain the respect of a white person, it’s probably a good idea that you find an obscure and debated grammar rule such as the “Oxford Comma” and take a firm stance on what you believe is correct. This is seen as more productive and forward thinking than simply stating your anger at the improper use of “it’s.

              Another important thing to know is that when white people read magazines and books they are always looking for grammar and spelling mistakes. In fact, one of the greatest joys a white person can experience is to catch a grammar mistake in a major publication. Finding one allows a white person to believe that they are better than the writer and the publication since they would have caught the mistake. The more respected the publication, the greater the thrill. If a white person were to catch a mistake in The New Yorker, it would be a sufficient reason for a large party.

              Though they reserve the harshest judgment for professional, do not assume that white people will cast a blind eye to your grammar mistakes in email and official documents. They will judge you and make a general assessment about your intelligence after the first infraction. Fortunately, this situation can be improved if you ask a white person to proof read your work before you send it out. “Hey Jill, I’m sorry to do this, but I have a business degree and I’m a terrible writer. Can you look this over for me?” This deft maneuver will allow the white person to feel as though their liberal arts degree has a purpose and allow you to do something more interesting.

              Don’t worry, it is impossible for a white person to turn down the opportunity to proofread.

              • Give Carl your Wife

                Dude, what's your damage?

    • ThatGuy

      As a man I have to agree. It was probably more funny back before a billion and have people were constantly doing it.

      • ThatMan

        As a man I have to agree. This was probably more understandable before people stopped using spellcheck and forgot basic grammar.

    • amrith777

      You know–I've always found this funny and ironic since,if we're gonna go global and include the entire world–then it's notable that most great cooks/chefs are men and I believe in some cultures–the men do all the cooking because they are considered the better cooks/gourmands….Just sayin'…..

  • https://www.facebook.com/people/Rob-Sherwood/1644246963 Rob Sherwood

    #8 I'd play with her.

    • #387

      That is why they don't let women drive in AfriPakiGhanastan Arabia!

      • GK-4

        because she's Indian

        • #387

          India is a suburb of AfriPakiGhanastan!

  • Dingo8MyBaby

    #9 I will do it. I will take the ring into Mordor!

  • ThatGuy

    #1, All of his ponies are from the wrong generation. No wonder he is such a meanie all the time.

  • https://twitter.com/NavjeetBajwa n_kb

    #11 From Vancouver, "LOL" hahahaha thats honeslty how it felt like downtown that day

  • Paul

    #11 and not a single sh** was given that day by these losers. Thanks for f**king up our city and I wish this was the reason.

    • Kranger

      I'm proud of you Canadians. Didn't know you had it in you.

  • MovieMaker13

    Mickey's a dick. #18

    • Gern Blansten

      Mickey Mouse to a three-year-old is a six-foot-tall RAT!

    • EXORCISMickey

      How is he a dick when he is clearly trying to exorcise the shit out of that kid.

  • Obie Slice

    #20 DO WANT

    • knuckledonkey


    • Khaqan Javaid

      Thinking of constructing my bathroom like that. Seems fairly easy 🙂

  • Your mom

    #4 lets me keep my faith in humanity. Good to see there are still awesome people out there.

    • TheAndychrist

      Amen mom.

    • DeRaNgEd

      I actually thought the thief wrote that to be funny because it says "I noticed you had no cash"

  • Josh Gorter

    #1 OMG I fucking rove my rittle ponies!!!!!

  • Catence

    #16 – I would love to celebrate the weekends like that.

    • Head Chef

      Golfers dont give a fuck, its the only professional sport where they dont get drug tested. Plus what sport can you play whilst smoking a cigar!!

      • donmcvay

        hence golf not being a sport…it's more of an activity

  • Patrick

    #1 My Little Kim Jong/ My Little Kim Jong/ Lalalala

  • http://thechive.com/ bkfrijoles

    more Airports should be like #5

  • urDad

    #7 Forever alone ,like most of the chivers.

    • http://www.youtube.com/user/ADHDavenger13?feature=mhsn Firefighter23

      You sir are an asshole!

    • amrith777

      This is a sweet and clever set up *runs to shed to get PVC piping*

  • Hero_ofthe_Day

    #20 Made me laugh so hard. I swear I went around for the next week replacing my many uses of "fuck" with "cuss." I love cussing with people

    • lolol

      swing, and a miss

  • pud3000

    Come at me bro!

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Benton-McGrath/587208531 Benton McGrath

    #3 Great car ruined. I hate rich people.

  • Chiveinator

    running? it looks to me like he's tiptoeing up behind some poor unsuspecting bastard.

    • TheAndychrist

      Smithers… release the hounds.

      • Chiveinator

        or the bees,or the hounds with bees in their mouths and when they bark they shoot bees at you!

        • amrith777

          No dude–That would be the job of the emu! o.0

    • http://www.thechive.com Ace Rimmer

      This pic was taken right before Milla Jovavich slow motion kicked it's head off.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Andrew-Salerno/144800145 Andrew Salerno



    • khlkjh

      No, Micky Mouse. It's an understandable mistake though.

  • Anon

    I think Bob actually just created a post without any reposts!!!! We should get him some kind of trophy or something to commemorate this occasion. We probably won't see another one like it for a long time.

    • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

      They couldn't if they wanted to. #18 is a repost 4 sure, not sure about the rest (probably all stolen from reddit).

      – the one you love to hate

  • yawn


  • Patrick

    #18 ITS MICKEY TIME!!!

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