Daily Afternoon Randomness (48 Photos)

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  • Bud Lee

    Hump DAR…what all other DAR's dream to be #3

    • TCUchiver

      could be one of the best humps i have seen! glorious!!

      • Rucky

        Is this the first hump you've ever seen? Lucky guess.

        • The Pope


          sums up dumbass america perfectly.

  • http://www.facebook.com/alex.mcglone Alex McGlone

    Yea, someone really should have told him those tattoos were a bad idea.

    • Smitty the non d-bag

      I hate it when it turns out there's a guy out there also nicknamed Smitty and he turns out to be a douche.

      • Sara D

        Fighting Ninjas on your Chest. BEST TATTOO EVER. This Dude IS Fucking Kickass

        • ldeegan

          Bill Nye?

    • McBeastie

      Better than these vagina tattoos…………………maybe. #39

      • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000490954417 Selena Sletten

        Why is it BLUE?!

  • nick


    • http://www.youtube.com/user/ADHDavenger13?feature=mhsn Firefighter23


    • GoRiders

      Why the fuck do people continue to do this? You gives a fuck if your first.

      • Casper

        I'm gunna have to say…huh?

      • John

        If people just stop responding, it will stop. Every post there is some d-bag that says first! then there are 15 comments replied under that. Just let it be and it will stop when they get no more attention.

    • MacNCheesePro

      You weren't first and anyone that posts "first" deserves a thread hi jack so other chivers can be on the first page. #27 made me laugh the hardest, but #45 made me the hardest!

  • taylor

    Sarah Jay hump?

    #3, #4

    • Bud Lee

      I'm going with a no…that is a lot of ass (and that is not a bad thing) to be Sarah Jay

    • parks

      I'm going with yes. Sarah, u in here?

      • John

        That is, indeed, a Sarah Jay hump

        • Bud Lee

          Well damn….I stand corrected

        • plinko

          I see our Chive overlord has joined us in the comments

          • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

            No I didn't (until now).

            – Chive Overlord Maximus Impressivus Gigantus

        • fred

          john, can i please swap jobs with you for a day… check that, i don't have a job so you basically get a day off. win win

  • Sauru

    #6 sounds like a deal to me

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=58203030 Andrew Tarr

      Maybe I'd have given him a dollar if he spelled "shitty" correctly. I know he's a bum and all, but a little initiative goes a long way…

      • Christian Lander

        Stuff White People Like, # 99 Grammar

        White people love rules. It explains why so they get upset when people cut in line, why they tip so religiously and why they become lawyers. But without a doubt, the rule system that white people love the most is grammar. It is in their blood not only to use perfect grammar but also to spend significant portions of time pointing out the errors of others.

        When asking someone about their biggest annoyances in life, you might expect responses like “hunger,” “being poor,” or “getting shot.” If you ask a white person, the most common response will likely be “people who use ‘their’ when they mean ‘there.’ Maybe comma splices, I’m not sure but it’s definitely one of the two.”

        If you wish to gain the respect of a white person, it’s probably a good idea that you find an obscure and debated grammar rule such as the “Oxford Comma” and take a firm stance on what you believe is correct. This is seen as more productive and forward thinking than simply stating your anger at the improper use of “it’s.

        Another important thing to know is that when white people read magazines and books they are always looking for grammar and spelling mistakes. In fact, one of the greatest joys a white person can experience is to catch a grammar mistake in a major publication. Finding one allows a white person to believe that they are better than the writer and the publication since they would have caught the mistake. The more respected the publication, the greater the thrill. If a white person were to catch a mistake in The New Yorker, it would be a sufficient reason for a large party.

        Though they reserve the harshest judgment for professional, do not assume that white people will cast a blind eye to your grammar mistakes in email and official documents. They will judge you and make a general assessment about your intelligence after the first infraction. Fortunately, this situation can be improved if you ask a white person to proof read your work before you send it out. “Hey Jill, I’m sorry to do this, but I have a business degree and I’m a terrible writer. Can you look this over for me?” This deft maneuver will allow the white person to feel as though their liberal arts degree has a purpose and allow you to do something more interesting.

        Don’t worry, it is impossible for a white person to turn down the opportunity to proofread.

        • cincy o

          Glad Grammer is #99 on the liist….

        • Paul

          " It explains why so they get upset"

          You are obviously not Caucasian.

          • Christian Lander

            Want to bet?

    • jasgat

      I'd give him a buck just for orginality

      • MacNCheesePro

        Same here. If they're just begging and especially getting upset because I don't give them anything, they get nothing! If they provide a service, such as making me laugh, they deserve something for it!

    • sarcasm

      I could just watch Mad Money for free

    • JerkFace

      How about you get off the trash can so I can throw my shit away. *throws away a dollar

      • Monk

        Might want to save that dollar and buy yourself some funnier jokes.

        • Joe

          Seriously. What a JerkFace.


    Late DAAAAARRRRRRRR, and fuck you Paula.

    • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

      Please do! Be sure to bring a fire extinguisher though, I like it rough.

      – the one that wants a signature tool for the Chive

      • Shawn Kunnery

        Coincidentally, just the way your mother likes it.

        • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

          Exactly, only you'd need something wider than a fire extuinguisher for her.

          – the one that still wants a signature tool for the Chive

          • http://twitter.com/soy_LG @soy_LG

            I really, really love you.

            • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

              I know what you're doing here… if a troll receives too much love they will melt…. I'm on to you, you sneaky evil woman you!!

              – the one you love to <3

          • Oversized

            Ok, in that case I'll have to use my penis.

            • The Pope

              wow. paula must be microscopic.

      • Bill

        he'll be sure to bring the sand paper

        • rodan303

          Is this Human Centipede 2?

  • Random

    #23 so hypnotic…. like a lava lamp…..

    • switch_24

      saw the original video of that gif on my FB wall last week, for like 50x.. not that i'm complaining, though =)

  • Jabroni

    #45 Hump Day is to awesome as Chivette hump is to awesome boner

    • b-ry


      another twilight reference, huh? the chivers must have a real hard-on for that movie.

  • Sauru

    oh and #38 any real chiver will greatly enjoy this

    • Indeed

      Over the years, dudes have asked me, "Why do you play volleyball? It seems kinda gay." Next time, I'll just show them this + the infamous volleyball ass post. Trust me, volleyball is the sport straight men play.

      • P90

        Actually it's a sport straight men watch, big difference.

        • Fallacy

          Ladies are interested in athletes, not couch potatoes, but you wouldn't know that.

          • P90

            Oh how you wound me, how ever will I recover.

  • Kaars

    #11… Your man card please…?

    • TitoRigatoni

      And here we see the Bitch in its natural environment. :D

  • forrester


    What can ya' say, she knew something was missing and she figured it out

    • Lotus

      I was skeptical of #48 at first. It went "oh wow I've never seen a girl in a BRA before" to "wow she can make stupid faces while writing on the mirror" to "DAMN now that's a hump!". She is truly gorgeous from behind.

      IMO hers was only hump I saw that was worth showing in this post. Without her this DAR would have been a waste since the attempts at being funny were, once again, mediocre at best. I know you can do better Chive, I knows it!

    • Anonamau5

      One small step for man
      One giant leap for blondes.

    • Adam G.

      Can't wait to see Sarah and all the other COTW's in the calendar it can't come soon enough.

    • martin bliwa

      her elbow scared the hell out of me tho!

      • http://www.facebook.com/denalong Dena Long

        yeah….she has big arms…..

        • Rucky

          Disagree, it's just a bad angle because the arm is flat against her side, making it appear big.

          • Monk

            Definitely think martin is talking about the first two photos of her where her elbow is inverted. As though its snapped. Double jointed I guess.

      • Admiral Ackbar

        Me Too! It's at an awkward angle in the first few shots.

  • Blumpkin

    #19 You obviously don't know what a gainer is.

    • sarcasm

      How can you tell which way he is spinning from a still picture?

      • Johnny Two Toes

        You can by the body position.

        • DWD

          It's the pixels.

      • Sarcasm

        You have such an original fucking name, don't you, cunt?

    • Jon L

      Definitely was… I took the pic. Mid gainer Chief

      • Blumpkin

        You suck at taking pics then bud

        • mh1

          Grotto, Tobermory?

        • Penis

          Well that's just ridiculous. His pic made you stupid?

    • Obviously.


      • It's Time

        C C C C COMBO BREAKER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

        • Obviously


          • Homer

            Obvi ….. DOH!

  • timmay

    #34, #35

    i laughed at that harder than i should have

    • Chiverchiver

      #34 a man nonetheless though right?

      • NikonTheDouche

        Its a girl….. I know her too well, surprisingly she has a sister that looks identical to hear named Pear.
        BTW Alita's nickname is Peach and she speaks with the fakest English accent.

        • njg

          Aka. Samrit Machielsen wrote this and doesn't have the balls to use his own name. Busted

          • njg

            You should be proud someone you know made the chive.

            • NikonTheDouche

              i am proud and also confirming to our fellow chivers she's a real she TEE HEE, but you're still a douche Nikon James Gormley.

      • http://twitter.com/#!/gfeinberg86 GreyGhost9

        I agree i dont care what anyone says, she may have a penis

    • Obviously

      I laughed at it just appropriately hard enough.

    • TCUchiver

      me too – out loud.

    • http://twitter.com/gsqrd @gsqrd

      I know! That had me rolling! :D

    • yep

      Did the "Hows about No" post in #36 make it a trilogy? hmmmm

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=686232240 Jvee Veneracion

      i'm with Indy on that one.

    • hMMMM

      #34 is not helping Thailand's case. Her face is…masculine.

  • 0Bianka0

    #39 It may be, but on your tattoo it kinda looks like… blue waffles…

    • pablo_v

      haha. I hope someone googles blue waffles now

    • Anonamau5

      A girl with shit like this scares me. Fortunately, I don't think she's into men.

      • The Pope

        no woman wants your ugly ass anyway.

    • disturbed

      Wouldn't take much to look better than your tattoo.

    • deeboo

      I had gladly forgotten about the blue waffle…..thanks.

    • Virginia

      That is the most declasse tattoo I have ever seen. Ugh!

    • Toby

      More important than its looks, is how does it taste?

    • Larry

      Sweet. My handsome cock is going to destroy your beautiful vagina.

    • HUH?

      looks to me like her vagina was made by Dodge.

    • http://twitter.com/kabaka @kabaka

      Funny how the interior is shaped just like a tampon.

  • jetrome

    #4 I love Hump DAR
    #23 FYI Korean girl group Sistar. Known for the body roll… and inducing fapping

  • Kodos

    When the Jolly Green Giant can't score.. we're in bad shape, America.

    • disturbed

      SPF 10,000

    • Mud On

      He puts mud on so he doesn't get hurt by poison ivy, I saw it on Dual Survivor. True story.

      • DWD

        Why is their poison Ivy in the middle of a beach?

        • DWD


          • Missed It

            You missed the joke.

    • nonamepls

      this looks like mud from the Dead Sea
      so this was probably taken in Israel

  • SweetAwesomeness

    #1 "Dudes….i think the port-o-potty is broke

    • RamRod


    • Broke?

      I never really pictured the Port-O-Potty as being a particularly lucrative endeavor to begin with.

    • Guest Commenter

      Eww, and well done.

  • Cyphon

    # 24 – I dont alway's comment on photos, but when I do, I comment on hot broads.

    props to her for making that marine's dream come true!

    • The Pope

      update: she changed her mind due to schedualing conflicts. look it up.

    • DWD

      #24 and if I knew that shit was so easy, I woulda joined the marines.

    • Fuck You

      God you are fucking horrible at commenting, just like fucking the absolute worst. Fail. At. Life.

      • Honk

        R.I.P. 2009

  • quintus

    Way to ruin my life once again reality #15

    • Question

      So… if I see myself as a jock, others see me as a hipster?

    • Another Question

      So, if I see 8 of myself, there is only 1 of me?

    • Vin Diesel

      I always thought I was an athlete, turns out I'm just a mediocre actor.

  • Kodos

    Immediate, unnegotiated ass-whippin'

    • Nico

      I like the girl in the back saying "Are you fucking kidding me!!!!" hahahaah

      • TCUchiver

        douchette deserved it!

      • Gutterville

        I would have said " bitch, did you enjoy your beer"

    • Troll of Truth

      And then he hands you the worst beating you've ever gotten in your life…and you both go to jail.

    • RamRod

      I'd be pissed too. I always hang on to my $10 beers like a fucking nazi-ninja.

      • Randy Marsh

        I'd like to think that kid that the courtesy to buy that dude a new one.

    • Meh.

      First Beerball ever

      • John T.

        Cubs suck dick

    • CarRamRod

      That "are you fucking kidding me" chick needs to relax. It's a ball game, you're going to get beer on you. Fact.

  • Mr_Rob

    #46 Failing like a boss…

    • Dan

      Fatty should pay attention. It's not like a baseball landing in the stands right next to you isn't obvious.

  • BMW

    Oh yeah… #4 #5 #7 #33 #38

    • Fuck You

      Fuck you and your useless fucking comment. God damn it, if I could I would take your comment, roll it up and fucking beat your fingers with it until you can't type garbage comments like this anymore and are forced to re-think your whole miserable fucking existence.

      • The Spicy Italian

        I kind of agree, we already saw these pictures and they weren't really enhanced by someone saying "oh yeah" like a creepier version of the kool-aid man, but is it really worth getting pissed off about?

        • Tort

          I don't think he was actually pissed off, I found it a humorous retort.

          • OIHRGIU

            same here.

  • parcel


    great subtle lip bite

  • Intensemasterdebater

    #39 And she thinks it's a butterfly…

    • Toby

      I try and stay away from the blue and yellow Vaginas…. just saying.

    • Penis

      I wonder if its to scale. Also would she get mad if you patted her on the back?

      • Jak

        She must have jungle fever

      • Vagina Jones

        I just hope its not a scratch and sniff.

    • Lesson

      This is what happens when you let her out of the kitchen.

    • C loc

      That shit looks like blue waffles… Ha!

  • http://thechive.com ontherun1989

    #9 and there are many gorgeous Chivette's on today's DAR.

    • Fuck You

      Clearly, you are not fucking any bitches here, or anywhere, ever. Your creepy comment is only further accented by your Kenny G look-alike avatar which clearly says "Ladies, nothing to see here."

      • http://thechive.com ontherun1989

        I appreciate your comment, but I assure you I am having sex on a regular basis and I no longer have long hair as in my avatar. Thanks for the input though! :)

        • Fuck You

          Ah damn it, you're not one of those whiny bitch Chivers. Carry on then.

    • itsobvious

      Yes there are many Whores on todays dar. Fap away.

      • The Chivery

        Of course they are. It's a prerequisite for a Chivette to be an attention-mongering whore, just like it is for Chivers to be socially retarded, sexually-repressed man children who think a Justin Bieber or Twilight insult is on the cutting-edge of humor. Chive on!

        • https://www.facebook.com/5dobermans Beth Brandl

          This website is so wrong, it's right. Whores and socially retarded, sexually-repressed man children who think a Justin Bieber or Twilight insult is on the cutting-edge of humor – the best of both worlds!

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