Daily Morning Awesomeness (20 Photos)

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  • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

    Hey wait Bob!! I know DMA is late but don't submit it yet! I'm still recovering from Lauren ( ❤ )! That woman is an animal!
    Btw there's a condom sticking out of your ass, is that normal?
    Oh and first again? HOW!??

    Hugs,
    Paula
    – "Paula is to Chivettes as DAR man is to awesome…"
    — LG – twitpic.com/5q3g21

    • Martin

      WTF?? Maybe I joined the chive to late to know why, but you are always handing out abuse. Is that because of a miss spent childhood, or just retardation?

      • BGP

        Don't mind Paula. She's our friendly neighborhood Troll. We love her.

        • jpp407

          not all of us.

          • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

            Yes you do ❤

            Hugs,
            Paula
            – the one you love to love

            • TheBAMFinater

              I think it should be – the one you hate to love.

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        Both, and then some! And ADHD!

        Hugs,
        Paula
        – the one too complex for your tiny brains

      • Mark

        I wish I could thumb you up more than once, Martin

        • Hich

          Heh… gross.

          Also, isn't Paula a dude?

      • yup

        Both?

    • BGP

      Paula c'mon and post for sexy Chivettes. I've asked twice and i'll only ask 100 more times. I dare you.

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        I was in the DAR once already. I'll look up the pic later (am on the netbook right meow).

        Hugs,
        Paula
        – the one you'd like to drown

        • Harry Balzack

          I saw your pic on TheBerry 🙂
          I got turned by your……

          Regards
          Harry Balzack

        • http://www.thechive.com DistractedIndividual

          I'm sure the world would love to gaze upon thy luscious lumps someday Paula, please post? :]

    • theederv

      fuck off paula

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=587208531 Benton McGrath

      Die, twice.

  • the truth

    fuck yeah.

  • Not Paula

    Hi Paula

    • Still Not Paula.

      Hello Not Paula.

  • Patrick

    #2 Epic Pig in a Blanket

    • scharfy

      What magic is this?!?

    • http://www.facebook.com/mikehayward Mike Hayward

      but a pig in a blanket is sausage wrapped in bacon….?

    • Dr_StrangePants

      Has anyone here ever heard of a Kolache?

      • http://www.thechive.com DistractedIndividual

        Love kolaches 🙂 A deli I worked at in High School made a few different flavors but the sausage cheddar was THA SHIT!

    • squirrel

      Im trying despirately to get my gf to make this…

  • Al Cy

    #17 too mainstream

    • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

      Eternal virginity…

      Hugs,
      Paula
      – "Paula is to Chivettes as DAR man is to awesome…"
      — LG – twitpic.com/5q3g21

      • Harry Balzack

        Lauren turned you down?

        They just don't understand us men.

        • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

          She turned me on! We'll get out of bed in a minute; she'll be online later today.

          Hugs,
          Paula
          – going offline now for another round of bedroom rodeo

          • snoobs89

            you the boss paula.

  • ratingsbeest

    #20 Challenge Failed! Dammit!

    • panama99

      Look for us guys just some of the stream has to hit the hole….

      ask my ex-wife!!!

      LOL

    • Jak

      I would still leave the light off in the middle of the night.

  • Anjin-San

    #5 #10
    Chive, I'm quite sure you receive tons of funny and kick-ass pics every day.
    Why you keep posting pics more than once instead of new ones?
    (I'm in bad mood this morning…)

    • jpp407

      because some people only click onto chive to see DAR and DMA so they may not have seen these pics in previous threads.

      • fritz müller

        no, these people don't exist… and if they do, they do not matter! theChive is a integral expierience.

        • jpp407

          I was merely stating, I agree with you?

    • haterade

      Because they don't bother to go through the pics, they just surf reddit and take them from there…

      • John T.

        I figured after one of the creators of Reddit got arrested this type of shit would stop. I was wrong. Go the fuck away haterade

  • oh herro

    #11 O_o

    • panama99

      If you watch this long enough Hillary's eyes are funny when they go crazy and the nipples do their little dance but it is a little long……

  • bbqboobs

    #5 This is like the 5th time you've posted this picture, what is it? Where is it? and why am I naked right now?

    • Gonzo

      Bangkok Thailand, dragon fish casino.

      • Gonzo

        correction marina bay sands in Singapore…

    • AAA

      It looks like the Marina Bay Sands in Singapore.

      • Gonzo

        Your'e right. im sleepy…

    • 90sgamer

      – it's a pool
      – it's in Asia (Singapore to be exact)
      – don't know, if you are hot, send a picture to the sexy chivers, maybe someone will tell you

      • haare am sack

        isn't it the infinitypool of the naumi hotel in singapore? because i just booked 2 nights there…

        • Gester

          Chive on from Singapore

  • Chase

    #16 Makes me want a Time Machine soo bad

    • NebraskaGuy

      I guess I'm one of the few Chivers who's actually old enough to remember the 70s, but yeah – air travel was like that. All 'flight attendants' were women (we called them Stewardesses back then), and GOOD LOOKING ones too, just like in the picture. They doted over you, didn't charge you for snacks, brought you pillows, blankets, anything they could do to make you feel comfortable, and a guest on the airline.
      Not so much nowadays 😦

      • notworking

        dammit this picture makes me feel like I was born 20 years too late. Thanks for the tales of the good ole days. I am sad now

        • Shady

          The music was better, travel was better (terrorists hadn't fucked the minds of every politician yet) and going to Vegas was the shit- yep, born too late…thanks mom!

      • Devil's Advocate

        Well, considering the population was about 60% what it is now in the world and most likely not even half of the population flew back then there was a reason they could treat each patron that way…not to mention the changes in the way women are treated in society. Nowadays there are so many people, many willing to fly, that if you don't buy the ticket most surely someone else will; there isn't an incentive for the airline companies to keep up those business practices.

    • Birdhaus32

      That was when you could probably pay to join the Mile High Club. It was the 70's after all. Cocaine anyone?

      • 'Lil Jon

        And a razor!? Or bush-hog!

    • Special_k

      That's still happening nowadays. Just not in America any more. I flew Singapore Airline a while ago, still as awesome as this.

      • FishyMan

        It's a trap!

    • Captlazarus

      Problem now is, those same exact girls are still working.

    • Ian

      Ahh.. Sexism and discrimination…

    • Taco Depot

      You know if you had a Time Machine then you wouldnt necessarily have to fly in a plane?

  • yuri

    #3 COCKTAIL WARS!!

  • Ay Ay Caramba

    You do realize that #10 is in front of pretty much every single Hard Rock Cafe restroom, right? No need to try and post photos of all of them…

    • mackin

      Apparently, we need to see every single version of this sign, even though I stopped thinking it was funny like, 20 years ago.

      • http://www.facebook.com/joshevans10 Joshua Evans

        i have never seen this sign, so dont be pissy just cuz you spend way too much time on the internet looking at pictures. they post multiple photos of it so everyone, and not just nerds like you, can have the chance to see it

        • Ay Ay Caramba

          You also realize that you can see all the pictures that have been posted before, right? They are still online, totally reachable, if only you would quit being such a lazy fuck and click on to page 2.

  • https://www.facebook.com/CUtigers530 Matthew Rose

    #21 is the best reason to ever get your hair cut at a salon.

    • Flicka

      Piff. The High Point carbines suck, and that one is like 150 new int he box!

      Lifetime warranty on their handguns tho…

      • CrackerUF

        lifetime warranty on the carbines too you dummy

      • hank1231

        the Hi Point Carbines suck? why is that? what is your criteria for sucking?
        I've had and still have a few and they work every time and are quite accurate.

      • Juan

        The Hi Point must suck because it is inexpensive to buy & shoot… You're right, so sucky..

    • http://twitter.com/valorikx221 @valorikx221

      To bad Hi Point's suck. But then again I guess a Hi Point in your pocket is better than
      the AK-47 you left at home

  • jpp407

    #7 Human's need something to strive towards. As soon as we landed on the moon, It was like.. 'Well that's it fuck all else to do now.'

    but theres always gonna be a smaller computer.

    • Harry Balzack

      They could always build a colony up there……

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=587208531 Benton McGrath

      United States of Mars, bitches

    • Kodos

      get your ass to Mars

      • tk421

        get your ass to Mars

    • Marvin

      Space Elevator, bitches!

    • Faceh

      Maybe its just me, but most of those advances are due to advances in electronics… building a new Spacecraft is a whole different thing than designing a new Nissan.

      • http://www.facebook.com/dirubin Daniel Rubin

        everybody knows that teh decepticons are using their influence on humans to suppress the space technology

  • xXbeermonkeyXx

    #9 milk is always a bad choice when you have a beard. spill just a little bit and youll be making cheese in a few days

  • Malkintosh

    “I fit 5 wieners in my buns.”

  • http://www.gfys.org/ sigh

    Lame morning again ,Soft porn posts get more views/comments so obviously the focus is there.
    From classy to trashy ,nice job.

    • NebraskaGuy

      Well, you *could* go over to theberry.com …. that might be more to your liking 🙂

      • Lotus

        Its lame, tired-ass replies like this that makes me hate some the chives commenters.

        The DARs comments are really bad nowadays. Nothing but "FIRST!", "MOAR!", and "I LUBS DA CHIVE!". What happened to the good ol comments/commenters from back in the day?

    • grrregg

      tried coffee yet?

    • satchel

      gonna have to agree 😦

  • http://www.gfys.org/ guest

    #22 Your average Chiver

    • 6655321

      Fat? Doubt it.

  • Z_b

    #13 No way! #18 just retarded..

    • Johnny Bloom

      #18 is awesome. you clearly drink wine spritzers. It's a couple of Aussie guys that make them. Called Iphone 4 opena

      • Bud Lee

        As long as it works… #18 is awesome. Anyone that thinks differently has never been to a tailgate and realized that he has a ice chest full of red stripe and no way to open them.

        • El Gordo

          Learn to open beer like a man or pass it to a friend who knows. Lighter, other beer, water bottle, boot, etc. All are good options.

        • Brobraham Lincoln

          If you can't open a beer without an opener you don't deserve the beer.

        • http://www.myspace.com/theamericanmaniacs BentWrenches

          I have never been denied of hoppy goodness by the lack of a proper bottle opener

        • Bud Lee

          I can place a screw in a wall using a Phillips head screwdriver too…but why would if I can simply use a drill and complete the task in a fraction of the time?

          Same thing here, why risk breaking the top of a pry off bottle using a "manly" method if I can simply take out my phone and pop the top off? Just because I could use my ring, lighter, boot, teeth, side of a table, etc…dose not mean I can't make my life a little easier with a handy dandy gadget.

          • Terrance_

            Well said.

        • Blumpkin

          I have a bottle opener on my keychain and always have since I was a teenager. Think ahead not behind assholes

        • matt

          Bad design is bad. Note that it will spray very moist air and probably beer foam directly into the dock port, where the moisture sensor is. Instant voided warranty.

          • Graucsh

            That's marketing's fault. Proper usage would be screen side up.

  • AnyoneForCoffee

    #7…Meanwhile, under development in the UK:
    http://www.bis.gov.uk/assets/bispartners/ukspacea

    • schango

      "Brits In Space."

    • Chris

      RULE BRITANNIA, BRITANNIA RULES THE (SPACE) WAVES!

      No, but seriously. We're a nation of around just 60 million, compared to the USA's over 300 million. I very much doubt that we could afford to be the first nation to reach Mars. Although I do think that, as it currently stands, the European Space Agency (ESA, of which the UK is part of) will be the first to reach Mars.

  • kindlin

    #11

    quite creepy

    • BloodScrubber

      Clap on…. Clap off …..

  • snoobs89

    #22 is what it feels like when your photo makes the DAR.

  • Catch

    I've had better.

  • http://www.gfys.org/ captainSarcasm

    Posting semi naked pics on the internet is not slutty or whorish at all ,only classy women do it.

    • ListenUp

      Getting on a website that you resent and commenting negatively is awesome and only intelligent people with busy lives do it.

      • OREWIg

        Getting on a website and posting snide comments to it's detractors and expecting everyone to share your opinion is a totally realistic expectation, and worthwhile way to spend your time. Only people who don't ride the Chive's dick from their mom's basement do it.

        • satchel

          getting inside a dryer is dumb. only drunk people do it.

  • DutchChiveFan

    #1 Smurficide

    • blue envy

      smurf yeah!

    • calvin_hobbes23

      Pappa smurf is tryn to get the hell out of dodge. you can actually see the agony on clumsy's face

    • Wally

      Somewhere Gargamel is smiling . . .

      • duckasaur

        Id say jealous, not smiling.

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