Daily Morning Awesomeness (20 Photos)

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  • http://www.facebook.com/katelyn.manchak Katelyn Manchak

    OMG
    I NEED NUMBER 12

    • Catence

      Right?! That is amazing!

      • http://www.facebook.com/katelyn.manchak Katelyn Manchak

        Legit. I'm like addicted to chewing ice cubes (actually chewing as we speak, hahaha)
        And that would just make it all seem soooo legit.

        • http://www.spachethespatula.com/ Rachael

          Perhaps you could say "legit" a few more times. That would be so totally *legit*.

          • http://www.facebook.com/ranDgallegos Randy Gallegos

            i wish i could give you more than 1 thumb … legit

            • WirelessCable

              Randy, you can with the checkmark of approval √

          • FLHomesteader

            I guess you can be…..

            Too Legit

            YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH

            • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1203540143 Josh Haddix

              next time put a # in front of your 12 so I know what you're talking about and don't have scroll back up to see whats so "legit."

              • Queue

                Laziness is not legit.

    • http://www.writesomethingfunny.com trboerger

      screw #12 I Need #3

    • Biblugiolu

      To use as a dildo

    • Stevo

      OMG I need Katelyn, seriously, I invite everyone to have a good lech at her !

    • http://dirkpittfan.tumblr.com/ thatwasfun

      wtf…two hot chicks in the first comment page…

    • WirelessCable

      Katelyn, I agree and approve completely √

    • https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=578060888 William Kaestner

      I concur

    • matt

      you can get 'em from Thinkgeek. HTH.

  • MonkeyMadness

    #1 Hate all you want, I love me some Katy Perry!

    • MonkeyMadness

      haha dammit.. #2 !!

    • http://www.facebook.com/ranDgallegos Randy Gallegos

      #1 like a carny

    • NebraskaGuy

      You know, when you're signed in under your Intense Debate profile and you post a message, you have the option to delete it and repost, rather than getting thumbed down. Hell, I miss a photo number on occasion and rather than becoming troll-bait, I just delete it and re-post. Easy🙂

  • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

    See what happens now John? I warned you about you losing yourself in the 'Sexy Chivers Selection Process' as you call it. I warned you several times, but you listen? Nooooo you didn't.
    You should have kept the door unlocked so we would have found your dehydrated body sooner. It's pure luck we found you when we were peeking trough the window.

    We're worried about you. I've canceled your next shipment of Kleenex; this has to stop.

    Hugs,
    Paula
    – the one who told you so

    • http://thechive.com Mr_Zambu

      Give him some sand paper instead of kleenex if u really want to get rid of his habit.😉

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        We've actually tried that. He didn't notice until he fainted because of the blood loss.

        Also; if he ever wants to shake your hand: DON'T!! He'll (unintentionally) break every single one of your fingers.

        Hugs,
        Paula
        – the one you love to hate

        • http://thechive.com Mr_Zambu

          i'm surprised he hasn't broken his weener yet :p

          • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

            I think he steals and drinks vampire blood from True Blood; he always heals so quickly…

            Hugs,
            Paula
            – the one you love to hate

            • http://thechive.com Mr_Zambu

              are you sure its vampire's blood & not some rodent blood.

            • ftw

              So John is Gay. It all makes sense now.

              • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

                Wut?

                Hugs,
                Paula
                – the one you love to hate

  • Darth oven

    Bake me a cake Luke!

  • Jake

    #18 I don't get it…😦

    • james

      what the original trilogy, if u still don't get it.. come back and ask again

      • Jake

        I've watch Star Wars dozens of times… it's the other part of the joke I don't get.

        • Dan

          Some people go out of their way to find gay propaganda in movies.

        • Oblivious

          When you have people over, sometimes you prepare food. Luke and Han are in the kitchen.

        • JAS

          Its what Han yells to Luke while rescuing Leia in the prison cells in A New Hope, so they put it in a more real world scenario. The joke isn't particularly funny.

          • Pwithc

            that was all accurate, except for the part about the joke not being funny.

    • Dan

      It would make more sense if it was Leia.

    • Paul

      Me neither. Stuff being posted never stopped em before

  • ...

    #21 peyote.

  • saucypants

    #20 Bowser's officially fucked.

  • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

    @ remark below #18: yeah…. 'cause you guys never repost. Ever. Hmppfff!!!
    Who are you kidding Bob, DMA photos also appear in the DAR on the very same day…

    Hugs,
    Paula
    – may the batter be with you

    • varlotto

      Speaking of batter, mine is great! But it takes a lot of kneading.

      • TheAndychrist

        Hate to be that guy BUT, you knead dough not batter.

    • Sko

      STFU, Douchebag

    • SlimShady

      For the first time ever, I agree with Paula. The Chive re-posts ALL the time. And how much weight has PATTY lost!? C'mon!

      • Lev

        Wondered about that too. My guess is, nothing really happened there.

  • http://thechive.com Mr_Zambu

    #6 very cool!

  • Sarah Jay

    the thought, "i want that" came up several times. mainly for #14. and also the bacon mountain in #3.

    • http://thechive.com Mr_Zambu

      #14 looks claustrophobic…

      • zino13

        To me, it looks like heaven. "I've always imagined heaven to be a kind of library"
        — Gabriel García Márquez

        • Sarah Jay

          YES. you just quoted one of my favorite authors. you, my friend, are awesome.

  • Lise

    #12 I was not thinking guns when I first saw that. Damn!

    • http://thechive.com Mr_Zambu

      ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!! rofl ! xD

    • 7.62x39

      To be honest those ice cubes look nothing like an AK-47 but my eye balls could be broken.

  • tawhitlow

    #14 Come with me to my nerd cave. We will read together.

    • http://thechive.com Mr_Zambu

      oh come on! there's nothing nerdy about it. stop feeling so threatened whenever you see a bookshelf.:p

      • Juiol

        Ding ding

    • varlotto

      personally i love anything that has a roof window

    • bab

      me no like book. me cool bra. u read is dumb

      • _bigdeal

        like text. like move hair out of face while text. me like say catch phrase.

  • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

    #10 should have been on the edge of the roof.

    Hugs,
    Paula
    – the one you love to hate

    • http://thechive.com Mr_Zambu

      Boooooooo !!

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        More like: "MeooOOoOooOOOOWWWWW!!!" >SPLAT<

        Hugs,
        Paula
        – the one you love to hate

        • snoobs89

          ohhh paula you so silly.

  • newt

    #22 welp i dont think that kid is going to have kids in the future

  • Herp Derp

    #21 Fuck Bitches, Get Turtles.

  • Joe

    Minus the hipster that is a guys best friend. #3

    • http://www.facebook.com/ranDgallegos Randy Gallegos

      "yaay i found the source of all bacon"

  • HeyJewed

    #2 Helping young boys make good use of their morning wood…

    • Chase

      There should be a planet of the apes joke in there.

      • HeyJewed

        Yeah… I was thinking that, or something about "spanking the monkey" but it seemed a little obvious.

    • ensergio

      Rise of the morning wood?

    • Dr_StrangePants

      If it was a human?
      get your stinking paws off me you damn dirty pervert

      lucky monkey

  • http://thechive.com Mr_Zambu

    #11 ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

    • HHNF

      ^ Your typical dumbass chiver.

      • Derp

        Haha! his name is Dan, What a tool.

  • MidwestChiver

    #5 Roll em up
    #3 yes BACON

  • Jake

    #20 Mother of God….. Why hasn't Nintendo thought of this yet??

  • Dan

    #2 That monkey ain't stupid!

    • http://thechive.com Mr_Zambu

      yeah, he knows where the wallet is hidden :p

    • Dan

      Also, Katy just strikes me as someone who would be awesome to hang out with. She seems so fun to be around.

      • snoobs89

        yeh, ur right those tits are awesome.

    • Bob

      I hope you mean Ape! Good to see he likes big boobs too.

  • https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1485290783 Marcus McConnell

    #3 the making of an epic meal!

    • _bigdeal

      i find all of the salted cured meats to be very erotic

  • Steamboat Willie

    "Today I didn't even have to use my A.K. I got to say it was a good day."
    #12

  • Illicit-Weaponry

    #2 proof that everyone and everything loves tits.

    • Rick

      You mean proof that everyone and everything loves Katy Perry's tits.

  • Pat Overton

    Suck my small dong !

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