Daily Morning Awesomeness (20 Photos)

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  • Tay

    Hey Gavo!

  • kaidoh101

    #20 hahahaha wtf??

    • smallchinaman

      Isn't that Dog the Bounty Hunter?

  • kaidoh101

    #15 ddddddddaaaaaaaammmnn!

    • Chamezz

      I bet those are the ones the baby in #14 was talking about :D.

      • Fasteddy14

        Not saying she isn't hot, but did anybody notice those monster hands?

        • craigarlen

          if you are complaining about her hands, I'm thinking you need to let your parents know they shouldn't be expecting any grandchildren…

          • hMMMM

            whatever, dude. Just b/c he notices other features (like abnormally large hands) doesn't mean he's gay…he just may have higher standards than you. Besides, when her monster hands are engulfing your already size-challenged manhood…

    • Patrick

      Anyone know her name?

      • Drew

        anyssa marie, a sports by brook model and hot as balls!

    • Yep!

      Who is she?!

      • Guest

        She graduated from Westmoore High School in 2004. Funny thing though, she was probably one of the purest girls in our school. Very sweet and shy, hung out with the nerdy girls. Had like one boyfriend whom probably never got to hit. Cool chick though, I had a couple classes with her. Those things are something else in real life, very distracting.

        • Guest

          she's out of Oklahoma City btw

  • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

    Chive!! I have the right to know how that couple reacted to my winning suggestion of what they could do for a free "anniversary Keep Calm shirt". Not a word or photo from the couple or you guys so far.
    It took me hours, blood sweat and yes, even tears to compile my winning entry so I demand to know or I will seriously start rubbing my hemroids with your toothbrushes again.
    Also, my intensedebate score took a serious hit because of the hundreds of upvotes so I've bled, now it's your turn.

    Hugs,
    Paula
    – the one you love to hate

    • Paul

      Are you still talking?

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        No, typing.

        Hugs,
        Paula
        – the one you love to hate

        • http://www.facebook.com/free2shred Shawn Michael George

          I like this. Paula's first troll sucks. Someone replies with an even worse troll and the good old Paula we all love and remember comes back with a stinger.

          I ❤ you Paula.

          • Dendrites

            Thanks for the play by play, Madden.

    • HeyJewed

      Here is my proof that we need to "thumbs up" Paula to piss her off!

      • The_Dood

        You beat me to it good sir.

    • theederv

      Fuck off Paula

    • Bill57

      you have no rights here this isn't your site you are lucky they let you post at all

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        Some creatures pay to play tennis, squash, go to the gym etc. to abreact.
        I pay to abreact on the Chive.

        Hugs,
        Paula
        – what, you guys can post here for free!??

        • The_Dood

          Pay?

          • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

            Yeah, so you can't get your posts deleted. What, you never heard of this?

            Hugs,
            Paula
            – the one you love to hate

        • Comment Raper

          Mad points on using "abreact."

          • Simon

            Twice.

  • https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1064188593 Josh Gorter

    #9 Grip N Sip love me the purple drink.

    • ricky

      this is paula

    • Comment Raper

      It's spelled "drank," get it right.

  • joel

    #18 where the buffalo room is a highly underrated movie

    • http://www.last.fm/user/mutiilator Brand_n

      Yep, and referencing the proper picture is highly overrated.

      • McBeastie

        But I'm sure if Hunter had started a school there would be a bar in it.

        • its_forge

          Someone asked him what he thought the minimum drinking age should be and he said "Sixty."

  • cjwhookid

    #17
    I'll bet some jagoff eats all the good flavors

    • _bigdeal

      purple tastes like shit

    • hMMMM

      but there are no BAD flavors, at least when it comes to ice pops.

  • joel

    #16, sorry stoned

    • The_Marc

      I bet that was one FUCKIN GOOD TIME!!!

    • The_Dood

      Yeah, they should've filmed this. It could've very well been better than the movie.

      • Biggus Diccus

        He did Ok playing him but Depp did a far better job

        • The_Dood

          I agree completely there. It's still a great movie though.

          • Cletus

            Murray played Thompson before it was cool, dammit!

    • Leezy

      Not recreating this shirt for the Chivery would be a sin.

    • SmokeyTheBear

      Everyone who has not seen 'Where the Buffalo Roam' is missing out!

  • maclean

    #14 me too

    • JP Souza

      I also prefer Dos Boobies.

    • Ha!

      yes, I concur, dos boobies always hits the spot

      • One Handed Joe

        Uno booby for me please!

  • MikeOlmos

    #16

    • McBeastie

      and?

      • SmokeyTheBear

        one does need words to describe this epic moment.

  • Paul

    #8 haha and the circle is complete an earhtquake was compared to 911

    • Paul

      Opps earth not earht but I'm still a little frazzled from 8/23/2011

    • Frenchgirl

      thx for the explanation i didn't get it at first!

    • McRo

      A local newstation (WJZ in MD) asked viewers to submit pictures of the quake. That picture (sans eagle and whatnot) was one of the ones submitted and aired. I'm not sure if it was sent in as a joke, or if serious.

      • Ebiggz

        That picture is actually from the earthquake (3.6) that Maryland experienced last year.

        • dub

          It's easy to remember with such damage.

    • 911 inside job

      who cares…

      • dub

        911 was totally an inside job. Earthquake? Probably not so much.

  • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

    #15 So that's how americans like boobs? For realsies??
    A nice pair of bouncy naturals for me plz.

    Hugs,
    Paula
    – the one you love to hate

    • Peter Parker

      Im not 100% sold that they're fake Paula…

      • http://www.facebook.com/free2shred Shawn Michael George

        I'm not 100% sure that those man hands couldn't snap your neck. Look at them. They are fucking huge.

        And no, I am not talking about the tits. Anyone who thinks those tits are nice needs to look closer. The underboob portion is a backslash. Cone tits, she has.

        • jpp407

          its probably washing day and she had to wear the shit bra. Give her a break man!

          • http://www.facebook.com/free2shred Shawn Michael George

            Nice tits need not hide behind a bra.

            • jpp407

              I think you missed what I said.

              • http://www.facebook.com/free2shred Shawn Michael George

                Fair enough, but I do have doubts that a girl like that would buy a shit bra to be forced to wear on laundry day. Gravity should be pulling those down into a nice and glorious round shape on the bottom. Any boob that can make a right angle has either had surgery or needs surgery. My two cents, but I love natural boobs and can't stand fake ones.

                • PieceofMind

                  Shawn, sorry, but I must slap you…
                  You say you like natural tits, but only if they come out right. So you condone surgery and despise it simultaneously. You sir, are a hypocrite.
                  I hope no girl ever points her nips in your direction again.

                  • jpp407

                    Point them in my direction instead.

                  • http://www.facebook.com/free2shred Shawn Michael George

                    Getting a nose job because you hate your nose is pointless. Getting a nose job because you have a deviated septum? Acceptable. Getting a boob job because your tits point in directions not considered normal (or you know, you have cancer, they kill your back, or any myriad of logical reasons)? Go for it. You deserve to be happy. Getting a boob job because you want bigger tits and money can by that? Disgusting.

                    Plastic surgery is the devil. Corrective/medical surgery is fine and dandy.

                    • Scientific Chiver

                      Very good points Shawn. I have to agree with you on this, I too believe that surgery is completely acceptable for the right reasons, not simply 'because'.

                  • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

                    You just described the Average Chiver again!

                    Hugs,
                    Paula
                    – the one you love to hate

                    • Average Chiver

                      Shoutout!

                      Also…

                      You know this is coming, right?

                      Get. Her. A. SANDWICH. We need some REAL women up in here!

                • its_forge

                  Everybody's got a few sets of crummy underwear man.

            • The_Dood

              They do if you want them to stay nice.

    • The_Marc

      I love em ALL.. small ones, fake ones, some as big as your head…

    • Commentary Supporter

      For realsies.

    • Guest

      Her bewbs are 100% real. I went to school with her since jr high. Bathing suit top is about as close I got to seeing them, but by no means do them come up short at all. Just a bad picture angle.

  • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

    #22 should have taken place on the edge of a roof.
    MeooooOOOWWWW!!!!!! >SPLAT!<

    Come to think of it… dangling a ribbon on such a location in a cat-rich environment should be hours of fun!

    Hugs,
    Paula
    – the one you love to hate

    • Paul

      Stop talking
      – the world

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        Stiiiiiil typing, asshat!

        Hugs,
        Paula
        – the one you love to hate

        • steven

          asshat lol

        • dub

          Still*

    • Scientific Chiver

      I'm not one to condone animal cruelty, but I admit I find shooting the local felines with non-lethal projectiles loads of fun!

      • Bill57

        wondeering if that would work on Paula? Hummm

        • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

          Anything under a .44 just tickles me.

          Hugs,
          Paula
          – the one you love to hate

    • The_Dood

      I'd pay to watch.

  • David

    15 is a big wow

    • steven

      #15……your welcome David

      • Grammar Republican

        * You're welcome, David.

  • chiveaddict

    #22 made me giggle ❤ Thanks!

  • Kringle

    #14 #15 Yes. Dos Boobies.

    • Rahm Emanuel

      thank you, you were the first one to see it…people are fucking stupid…

    • Handy

      i see what you did there.

    • OwnerOfYou

      That's a Chive Win for sure…

  • Peter Parker

    Im not easily offended…and I have to say #8 is offensive-

    • steven

      agreed …. pisses me off actually.

      • hMMMM

        This wasn't poking fun AT 9/11, it merely used the same meme for a different event. Get your panties out of a bunch.

    • Catbra

      Pffft, come on. How many other pics have you found on Chive which pushes the boundaries further than this and you've laughed?

      • Peter Parker

        1st time ever being offended by the Chive actually- not cool John

    • http://www.spachethespatula.com/ Rachael

      I don't know… I though it was pretty funny?

    • http://www.facebook.com/free2shred Shawn Michael George

      Fuck that. I'm American and that was funny as hell.

      • grammersoviet

        I'm not American and it was still funny as hell.

    • reme

      I'm not 'offended' per se, but don't think it's particularly funny. When we joke about it…we're forgetting. You know what happens when we forget…

      • Dunny_

        …people die???

        …an angel gets his wings???

        …the Grinch's heart grows 3 sizes???

        I seem to have forgotten.

        • Meh

          HA!

      • HUH?

        i dont know, i forgot.

    • Dan

      as a non-american ive no idea what this means… care to fill me in?

      • bettingonthecubs

        Its mocking the dc earthquake (5.8?) and at the same time using the 9/11 slogan of never forget. Offensive to people who lost loved ones in 9/11 i guess

        • let it go already

          Who cares – people around the world are subjected to violence every day. Americans have one big attack and want to immortalize it forever. Surprises that we aren't allowed to work on 9/11 yet. Move on already.

    • Helmet4

      It's satirical and it's hilarious.

    • Handy

      wait, is it offensive? or does it just offend you?

    • 10 YEARS

      It's been 10 years and, clearly, no one has forgotten.

      Pretty sure the "too soon" statute of limitation expires after 10 years.

    • dub

      9/11 was an inside job. I find that offensive. Same people running shit still.

    • panama99

      I'm not easily offended and I wasn't ……

      Nor did I think it was extremely funny. I did chuckle at it.

      Look folks, you cannot be extremely thinned skinned about what happened on 9/11. It happened, we survived, we will continue to survive. We are a great Nation but don't let every little comment piss you off.

      If you agree with me great, if you don't fine and if you think 9/11 was an inside job you're a fucking idiot.

    • booboopeedoo

      There are just certain things you don't joke about. 9/11 attacks are one of those. Will forgive you for this one CHIVE, but please a bit more sensitivity.

      • McBeastie

        but misogyny, racism and jokes aimed at the mentally challenged are still acceptable for you, right?

      • CuriousGeorge

        Anyone here realizes that the joke isn't about 9/11 but about the earthquake (and probably the media coverage, idk)? It's poking fun at the earthquake using 9/11 references, not the other way around. Jesus!
        Doesn't take much to offend some self-righteous americans these days. OMG! I said jesus. I probably offended people now. OMG! I said OMG… Time to go whip myself to expiate my sins.

  • Peter Parker

    I wonder if #15 ever gets tired of guys drooling all over her incredible assets…

    • Rahm Emanuel

      photo shop retard

      • http://www.facebook.com/free2shred Shawn Michael George

        I sure hope so. Cone tit's up there looks like a bad photoshop job. Either that or she was born out of proportion.

        • JDub

          Shawn, get over it dude! Shes got huge tits and this is obviously a pushup bra that makes them look ever bigger. you've posted a dozen times arguing about this shit already. look her up, Anyssa Marie.

          • Ha.Ha.

            seriously. judging by the profile pic, you ain't gettin near any tits anytime soon…whether they're cone-shaped, fake or whatever. Guy that looks like you shouldn't be so judgmental or picky….unless you like the chochiwado

            • http://www.facebook.com/free2shred Shawn Michael George

              Oh, you've done it. You've insulted the way I look. Now prepare for me to not care. And at least I don't hide behind the grayed out mantle of anonymous on this site.

        • dub

          Yeah, dude. You're a tool. You pretend that you don't get any ass because girls just aren't good enough for you.

          You would toss yourself at the feet of any girl with tits and a vagina and you know it, regardless of size or proportion.

          You look really cool on the internet, Shawn Michael George!

          • http://www.facebook.com/free2shred Shawn Michael George

            lolwhut? I already said up there ^ that I like boobs of any size as long as they aren't fake. And I draw the line at blue waffles, thanks.

        • Todd

          Like he is really ever going to get a girl working at Walgreens hahahahah

          • OIEwhgr

            you're all a bunch of idiots.

          • http://www.facebook.com/free2shred Shawn Michael George

            Helluva troll. Nice of you to take the time to read my Facebook page. Way to waste your time, todd.

        • its_forge

          I googled Anyssa Marie per a suggestion above; it looks as if this woman just doesn't know *how* to buy a bra that fits her correctly. They had a woman like that in a feature on The CHIVE, a while back. Hell it could be *that* woman for all I can remember.

    • #15

      I don't.

  • http://www.writesomethingfunny.com trboerger

    #19 admittedly was me on my first day too …

    • Rahm Emanuel

      you are a pussy

  • tmoney

    #8 isnt funny

    • Kringle

      yes it is.

      • Peter Parker

        totally distasteful, just like your mama's poon. Tell that crazy bitch I'm not going there again…

        • bettingonthecubs

          Uncle ben thought it was funny

    • steven

      agreed

    • fro

      funny as shit, get over it

    • tmoney

      sorry guys, i just got the joke.

    • reme

      FUCK THE CHIVE for deleting my comments defending my right to be offended. FUCKIN INTERNET NAZIS!!!

      • NJF

        Chill.

      • OIIIIE

        agreed.

  • Peter Parker

    #16 Murray and Thompson could take on the most interesting man in the world and Ol Spice guy for world awesomeness domination-

    • Dashete

      Hunter Thompson did dominate (Read:shoot) the most interesting man in the world. Himself.

    • its_forge

      Thompson thought Murray was a stupid hack and wanted to kill him for making a movie that clearly didn't get what Thompson was actually about and just making fun of his drug and alcohol abuse without pointing out that his journalism for the most part was unequaled in all of literature.

  • Nanook

    #8
    5.8?! Meh!
    You guys are pussies.
    Respectfully,
    Sri Lanka, Japan, and anywhere in the U.S. west of the Mississippi.

    • Bond's Martini

      And Christchurch, NZ!

      • hMMMM

        and Vesuvius, Italy

    • Chris

      and Perth W.A
      hehehehe

    • august west

      not sure about 'anywhere' (don't know how to italicize) west of the Mississippi. Pretty sure CA is the only state on a major fault line.

    • Gevth

      Basically, everywhere inside the Ring of Fire: http://www.enchantedlearning.com/subjects/volcano

    • HUH?

      exactly, you know what we call a 5.8 on the west coast? breakfast or a good dump.

    • OIEwhgr

      i'm from D.C. and i still think they're pussies.

  • Nick

    #7 I dont see much of a difference

    • Hand Of Fate 125p

      Screw you ,i love Twilight.

    • Handy

      hangon, this is shopped?

    • Pwithc

      Is that TImmy Turner on the right?

    • dub

      The chick on the right is actually pretty good looking… except the stubble.

      • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=761074582 Jessica Condrey

        she is more manly the he is

  • Lito

    Is it me or did all of yesterdays posts kinda suck?

    • obvioussssss

      You suck coz u expect thechive to post anything interesting now ,its all about the soft porn posts bud.

      • dub

        Lower case "T"

        for Time to Leave.

  • Leonel

    #22 Is like Ninja Warrior from Japan! Hahahaha.

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