This is all true (27 photos)

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  • James Cameron

    #15 Why indeed…. have never seen a point to this gap, unless for a FUPA.

    • Mike

      Its so your Dick wont touch the seat for all you smaller fellas out there. Notice its only in public restrooms.

      • Lawndart

        So insted it can rest on the nasty porcelain bowl that usually has pee and pubes on it? I think not.

        • Uncle Scotty

          So you're a smaller fella?

          Fail.

    • Waylon

      To save money. For every 10 there is enough material left for another seat.

      • The_Dood

        That would've been my guess.

    • shaka

      Its a code requirement you idiots… when men do not lift the seat, that area gets piss on it.. if you need to take a shit, your dick would hit this piss filled area…
      has been in the building code for years now…

      • sniggi

        This. also, it's convenient so that in case the seat falls down mid-piss it won't slap your stream and make you look like an idiot.

        • Underbaker

          Similar thought, but mine is so it won't whack your weenie if it falls down during mid pee. Not only messy but quite painful.

          • Malkintosh22

            Why do you stand that close?

            • Avkiwi

              so you don't end up dribbling on the floor.

            • Herby Sagues

              Who says he stands that close?

      • shakayurtinydick

        discussing this like you do and waxing your emphatic knowledge of situations regarding the thought of one day your pecker actually reaching this piss/ filled zone, tells me the mentality and somewhat obscure intellegence we are dealing with,

        Please elaborate on your building code storys and explain to us why we should really care about how obsessed you are with piss contaminated areas?

        • gumball

          *stories
          When we pluralise abstract nouns ending in the letter 'y' more often than not it is changed to 'ie'. It's pretty basic grammar

          • Alpha0010

            Although, "storeys" means "floors of a building"

      • SenorWilson

        When I miss it goes all over; Because when I miss it's because I randomly have an intense shiver because of the air touching my penis. So who ever made up that code obviously doesn't have a penis.

      • Clarkle

        I think its a great feature. If i run in to take a piss without lifting the seat up, I can lift it with my foot mid stream without hitting the seat. Don't tell me I'm the only one that has ever down that.

    • Mad Max

      What about the green handle?

      • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=27206114 Michael Ricketts

        multi flow (stupid green tech). lots o water for #2…..little bit of water for #1

    • the toilet guy

      it's to let water flow out easily when the toilet overflows

      • The_Dood

        because the seat is 1/2" above the toilet…?

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1102363732 Kevin Hulett

      It's so that if you're mid stream and the seat falls, it won't get covered in urine. It's also so that if you begin urinating and realize the seats down, you can lift it up without stopping and not piss on it…

    • LeMac

      It's so you have some equipment for hillbilly horseshoes when the toilet breaks down

    • Plumberized

      Its actually for the ladies, that area gets sprayed on the underside and gets disgusting. Ask a plumber.

    • Alister

      note to americans: your country is the only country in the world that does this. stop being so fucking lazy and LIFT THE SEAT!!

  • Chris

    #15 Because you're too lazy to put the seat up and nobody wants to sit in your piss.

    • AGM

      if everyone had good enough aim to only dribble into that spot, there would be no need for it

      • Ernie

        try aiming when you're shit-faced

    • The_Dark_Knight

      I thought it was to help support the game of redneck horseshoes… my bad

    • NothingToSeeHere

      It's not laziness, it's preference. I prefer the extra challenge of aiming to avoid the seat.

    • LiT

      thats bull… when I piss.. I piss all over

      • Meh......

        I just piss in the sink, problem solved

        • WOIEj

          same here.

    • Sal

      How do you piss?

    • Héctor

      so that your penis does not touch the seat that someone else play with his penis

    • Your Dad

      Cause I don't want my dick touching the seat when I shit

  • misschris

    #2 So true. And I sure did love Eve 6

    • dweber77

      Kids of the 80's for the win! Cable was a luxury back then so we had to play outside, our parents never had to force us out the door. Even Nickelodeon was a pay channel. And we grew up with bands like Depeche Mode, The Cure, Culture Club and on and on and on. We were around for the birth of MTV when it actual was what the letters stood for and nothing else.

      • Frank

        I don't know but cable still seems like a luxury to me since I dole out $150 bucks each month to Cox. Nickelodeon is still a pay channel (at least I've never gotten it on my over the air antenna) therefore I pay for it as part of my cable package. And MTV sucked as much back then as it does now. Whats worse, watching Boy George or Jersey Shore?

        • The_Dood

          Boy George or jersey shore. That's a toughie.

          • Yeppers

            At least when the 4 minute Boy George video was finished they played a different song and there was a decent chance it would be a song you liked. When Jersey Shore gets done it's Teen Mom, The Hills, Real World, or something else just as ridiculous.

            • The_Dood

              I wouldn't know, I stopped paying for cable years ago. I just buy South Park dvds now. The only thing I miss is adult swim. I am one of the only Americans that can honestly say I've never seen a second of jersey shore or heard a Katy Perry song.

      • bab

        cheers to that….gameboy didn't require an imagination….shit I grew up in the 80's and I had a goddamn stick. It was a sword and could be turned into a gun in a second's notice. Imagination, pfft!

    • Da Sandman

      i think they missed the snes in that list 🙂

      • derp

        and the mega drive. game not working? pull out cartridge, blow in it and put it back in. simpler times.

    • themordify

      😦 reading that made me feel old

    • junior

      I grew up in the 70's we had weed and lazer light shows….get over yourselves

      • http://www.myspace.com/theamericanmaniacs BentWrenches

        And Led Zeppelin And Black Sabbath

    • Dolfan0925

      Ya man kids now need NO imagination, but kids in the 90's didn't need much of one.

    • http://www.facebook.com/matthew.joy Matthew Joy

      When I was a kid I lived in shoe box…..

    • http://www.facebook.com/EdHopkins1 Edward Hopkins

      Use your imaginations now, 90s kids. The way you feel about today's kids is the way '70s kids feel about you. We played with real pets and made dirt cities for our hot wheels cars. We listened to KISS, (but didn't realize until much later how stupid they were.) We watched cartoons on Saturday mornings and on holidays, because that's all you got back then. There was no internet, there were no cellphones. But, the previous generation thought we were spoiled brats because we had color TV, and Atari, and VCRs, and digital watches with calculators in them. Every generation likes to look down their noses at kids for enjoying the luxuries that grownups invented and gave to them.

      • Shane Graef

        Damn Straight!

    • stupid_dummy

      this is bullshit…I grew up in the 90's and I hated those crappy bands…and I never had a gameboy…had a sega game gear…still play it sometimes when i'm baked

      • Obi-Too

        I hate these "when I was a kid" things.

    • gimletmike

      Yeah, well us kids of the 60's……. never mind to you that is such ancient history that you could not possible relate to it.

      • A BiPolar Guy

        I'm a 60's I can relate. Caveman days.

        • http://twitter.com/Jimsouthern82 @Jimsouthern82

          I was a poor kid of the 80's. I had a brother.

  • EasternCanuck

    #10 so true!!!

    • The_Dood

      Or worn to be pulled up a little…

    • Herby Sagues

      Not true. The prettiest ones are made to be chewed.

  • AssClown

    #14
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    • Broseph Stalin

      (_/)
      =(0.0)=
      (")_(")

      Not as impressive but in my mind equally awesome…

      • Broseph Stalin

        shit! My fuckin bunny got mutilated! OH THE HUMANITY!!!!!

        • Jules

          ╭∩╮(︶︿︶)╭∩╮

    • Laurissa

      [ 🙂 ]–< happy robot….
      [ 😦 ]–< sad robot…
      [ 8{| ]–< robot in disguise…

      • Laurissa

        shit. the smiley faces were not meant to be that way. I suck.

    • greasdupdeafguy


      ▲ ▲

      damnit…

  • Tim

    #12 you mean I can still have my rainbow shooting face from my childhood?

    • Tim

      Ahhh, that explains why I meet so many people that very much appear to be grown adults, yet talk and act like children….

  • ColdToast

    First?

    • nope

      hahaha you fuckhead

  • nope

    i think its a lie

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1623814660 Thomas Spadea

      the cake is a lie

  • bob

    #15 so guys dont have to put the seat up

    • bhs616

      Exactly what I was gonna say.

    • putzco

      No, so if it is up, & falls down why taking a leak, it won't hit you in the dick!

  • AverageChiver/Gamer

    #1 True.

    • Jbones

      I agree. When I think about, I suppose my mom is a pretty big whore.

      • hsk1998

        and she seems to be into homophobic, racists with squeaky, cracking voices.

  • da2conan

    90's kids?! Give me a break. I watched G.I. Joe and Transformers, had an Apple IIe and played super mario brothers and castlevania! By the way… NO INTERNETSSSSS

    #2

    • Stevo

      Yesss! Everyone forgets just how much the 90's kids sucked.

      • Brian King

        AMEN Stevo! 80s kids are way better!

    • Da Sandman

      transformers, batman, x-men, spiderman, … when i look at all the awesome cartoon shows and present cartoon shows, i can't help but think: WTF HAPPENED???

      • Steamboat Willie

        You left out the the Ghostbusters, the Ninja Turtles, Talespin, Chip and Dale Rescue Rangers, the Gummi Bears, Duck Tales, Beetlejuice, G.I. Joe, The Tick, the Snorks, Darkwing Duck, Mutant League, Pirates of Dark Water, and so many more that I just can't remember off the top of my head.

    • http://echogeo.wordpress.com/ echogeo

      Unless you remember the true awesomeness that was Looney Tunes and Merry Melodies, you do not know real cartoons.
      90's kids? 80's kids? C'mon, Sherman, step into the Way Back Machine and set the timer to the 60's.
      If you’re old enough…go back…
      Before the Internet or the MAC…before SEGA or Super Nintendo…way back…
      I’m talking about hide and go seek at dusk, sitting on the porch, Simon Says, Kick the Can, Red light, Green light, chocolate milk, going home for lunch, penny candy from the corner store that cost a penny, girls playing hopscotch, butterscotch, skates with keys, jacks, Mother May I? Hula Hoops and Sunflower seeds, Whist, Old Maid and Crazy Eights, wax lips and mustaches, Mary Janes, saddle shoes, Coke bottles with the names of cities on the bottom, running through the sprinkler, running behind the DDT truck, sittin’ on the curb, staring at clouds, circle pins, bobby pins, the Mickey Mouse Club, Crusader Rabbit, Rocky & Bullwinkle, Kukla, Fran & Ollie, Spin & Marty
      …all in black & white.
      Kids of the 60's had real imaginations.
      More on my blog if you care to read it.

      • da2conan

        Underdog show used to show that stuff. I do have to agree, the 1967 spiderman was gooooood stuff!

      • DoucheMcFuckstain

        You know how much condoms cost? Me either, we never used them.

        • http://www.myspace.com/theamericanmaniacs BentWrenches

          God yes,I remember life before AIDS.Could get laid at the drop of a hat! It came about while i was married,after the divorce,the whole world had changed.

      • Holy Hell

        I remember all the neighborhood kids would run behind that damn DDT truck.
        The closer you were to it, the less you could see what was ahead.
        I guess all kids are pretty crazy, no matter what generation they are from.

        • Steamboat Willie

          DDT was weak shit, now Chlordane that's the stuff that would fuck you up.

      • S. K.

        Great read dude. Thank you.

    • Krusherx

      Citing Nickelodeon as good programing is beyond me…

    • C3POHMYGOD

      My dream is for Good Goo Dolls and Jimmy Eats World to tour together so they can die in a fiery plane crash…

  • sadbuttrue

    #24 The chivers will die as virgins.

    • chiver

      but will slam the ham quite often

    • TROY

      You do realize you just chived, right?

      • sadbuttrue

        I never said I wasn't a Chiver, just that all of us will die virgins.

    • TheRealSnowman

      Really?
      I'd better tell my four kids that I'm not their dad after all, cause I read otherwise on the interwebz.

      • divorce lawyr

        Silly snowman ,they are not really your kids.

  • Meh

    Wow, this sucked for a Friday. Nothing 'awesome' about it.

  • igtbanned

    #20 Perfct example of Chivers/Chivettes ,one is obese the other is a slut.

    • LeMac

      Just in case ya hadn't heard……..attractive woman =/= slut

      • LeMac

        * = / =

    • TRON

      win

  • Tony

    #25
    My girlfriend says that every time I leave to go golfing!

    • Meh......

      She is cheating on you…….

    • n_kb

      why can't people just think that us women are honest? When I say "have fun" thats what I actually mean.

      • SenorWilson

        Because this is the internet. The internet is extremely sexist if you haven't noticed. ^_^

        • DrROBOTO

          actually its because its true and n_kb is lying

  • moooo566

    Maybe #15 is saving materials or something.

  • chiverMike

    #19 is awesome – haha.

    • Henrik

      I missed what Nickelback did wrong, I mean their songs are… Meh, but why did everybody suddenly start hating them?

    • Truth

      It would be even funnier and more truthful if we replaced Nickleback with Dave Matthews Bland, do'nt get me wrong, they do suck too.

  • Smoke Dogg

    #15 . . . because some of have cocks you dumbass.

    • Yeppers

      So do you lose your cock when you're at home? I don't know about your bathroom, but mine has a normal toilet seat without the stupid gap.

      • Meh.....

        I have a urinal in my bathroom at home…

        • Yeppers

          Must suck when you have to take a shit.

  • Stevo

    #15 Because chive likes to repost?

  • patov40 89p

    #1 My dad and ALL my fellow amazing, successful ,intelligent Chivers ,we are this close.

  • Tatts

    This is the biggest load of crap I've ever heard. Every fucking generation seems to think that the current generation of kids has it so much easier or some such bullshit. Let's go back to my great grandmother's generation and ask her what she thinks about your indoor plumbing you lucky shits. Then her great grandfather can talk about curing illnesses without drilling holes in your head, kids have it so great.

    #2

    • theoceanbeauty

      Well said

    • Makes No Excuses

      What exactly did you read in that pic that made you think it was referring to an ease of living?

    • Chaos

      Whoa, sounds like somebody has some real issues he need to work out.

    • The_Dood

      You just proved what you were arguing against. Every generation has it easier than the previous generation. Congratulations.

    • Yeppers

      Let me guess…up hill, both ways, in the snow, without shoes… right?

      • ZachBob

        10 miles each way.

    • Logan

      i think someone got denied the Chive On tee! and now he's angwy!

    • lil momma

      This generation does have it easier than we did growing up. Not saying that our's was the hardest thing going, but that little blurb does have a point! My younger sister and i are 6 years apart, I'm 25 and she's soon 19, and i wouldn't ask her to make a can of soup for me while i was on my death-bed for fear she would either burn my house or somehow manage to f*ck it up!!

  • its_forge 107p

    I have a tiny penis.

    • TiminPhx

      Your ex-girlfriend already told us.

      • JAFitC

        And sent photos.

        • Meh......

          Dad, you're drunk. Go to bed……

  • g3nXsLack3r

    #2 – You listened to Eve 6, Jimmy Eat World, and The Goo Goo Dolls. Man that sucks…I guess at least it wasn't Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus.

    I think the 80's kids have a few spots open if you want to claim you grew up in a decade that was actually cool.

  • http://twitter.com/irlNick @irlNick

    Looks like the 90s kids are finally hitting the "those damn kids are a waste of space… get off my lawn" stage in life. I'm an 80s kid and love to point out that the 90 kids are a bunch of whiny cry babies who need to get off my lawn.

    #2

    • ZachBob

      I think it's just like that for every generation. 70s kids hated 80s kids, 80s kids hated 90s kids, and us 90s kids hate the 00s kids. and in ten years, the 00s kids are gonna hate the 10s kids. It's a vicious cycle.

      • JHL1

        That's nothin….
        Back in the 1920's we didn't have that television thingy, we had to listen to the radio, but we had to walk 10 miles to the rich neighbor that had one. If we wanted to know about Winnie the Pooh we had to buy the book and read it. If we wanted to take a trip to Europe we had to sit in a boat for a few weeks. We were so bored we starting sitting on poles for the hell of it. Thank god someone invented Yahtzee. Hell we didn't even have air to breathe, well at least you couldn't see it.

  • WhiteVabMan

    Im a child of the 90's and im calling BULLSHIT on no.2 #2

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