The Dream Job: Intern at theCHIVE

chive intern2 The Dream Job: Intern at theCHIVE

After two weeks of searching, we still haven’t found a new Chive intern. Big hint here: We really do need you to know Photoshop and own an automobile. And so Round 2 of interviews begins now!

This is some lucky bastard’s chance to become a Chiver. You must live in the Los Angeles area, sorry Milwaukee. It does pay a little, but the shit you will learn is priceless. Here is your job description and some instructions. Pay attention. This is your first test:

1. Submit all applications to thechivesubmit [at] gmail [dot] com with subject line, “Intern”. Resumes are welcome but be creative.
2. You may get the chance to post on theCHIVE. Please attach 5 photos you think are funny or compelling that we have NEVER seen before.
3. Must be willing to work odd hours and weekends
4. You will be doing grunt work; filling t-shirt orders, getting lunch, getting verbally abused, running errands. For this reason, you must have a car.
5. Must know photoshop – that’s a big one. Video editing skills would be nice, but not required.
6. Willing to work at least 7 hours a day, 5 days per week.

This is a tremendous opportunity for someone in or fresh out of college and it does pay a little. Working for Resignation Media will arm you with the skills you’ll need to take over the internet someday.

Good luck and Chive on,

Leo n’ John

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  • destin

    why are the lyrics to Eminem's 'Lose Yourself' playing in my head?

    • thomas

      … you only get one shot

      • mick

        One opportunity

      • nathan

        don't miss your chance to blow

        • Robert Plant

          shut the fuck up. faggots.

    • None

      Because you have a perchance for terrible music?

      • Jen

        LMAO

    • CruzLara

      @me I just got a $829.99 iPad2 for only $103.37 and my mom got a $1499.99 HDTV for only $251.92, they are both coming with USPS tomorrow. I would be an idiot to ever pay full retail prices at places like Walmart or Bestbuy. I sold a 37" HDTV to my boss for $600 that I only paid $78.24 for. I use BidsOut.com

  • derpson

    i wont apply cuz ill probably get caught jerkin the gerkin during shay's photo shoot.

    • Pål

      Boys hide and jerk. Men try to hook up with her 🙂

      • The_Dood

        What's with the thumbs down? Are you guys serious that you would rather hide in the corner?

        • The Chivery

          Of course. We're Chivers. A corner to jerk-off in that isn't the basement is all we could hope for.

          Chive on!

      • DWD

        Men try to hook up with her but when that fails, at least have the decency to hide and jerk.

    • Çreep

      i wont apply cause it sounds like you would actually have to work at work and get paid a "little". thanks for the offer but my job "doesn't suck".o.0

      • CDN

        Yeah, sounds like the jobs that theChive staff are too lazy to do themselves.

  • mick

    FML I don't live in America … FML!!!

    • ...

      that's not a bad thing you know.

    • Just Sayin'

      Let's try opening a British Chive Office 🙂

  • Love2LiveLife

    i wish i lived in LA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You sure you don;t need someone working on the East Coast for you?? If not im willing to move. Dual major, business and graphic design.I'm doing sales right now, and looking for something new!

  • Justin Hall

    Yea', fuck you Milwaukee.

  • DJwillflo

    Yet another reason to be depressed about not living in Cali…

  • Jules

    Wow, sure wish I lived in LA ):

  • Cesar

    How about opening a branch in AZ?

  • Lodi Dodi

    Fuck LA and all the Ed Heardy wearing dbags that live there. Isn't The Chive Chicago based anyway…???

    • JPV

      NO fucktard its based in venice beach;

      don't ever insult west L.A. again

    • http://twitter.com/Eder_Paz @Eder_Paz

      SCREW ED HEARDY!!!!

  • zym

    "We all work from home on Fridays." REDACTED: "…because it gets weird fapping to the Sexy Chiver submissions in the inbox when we're together."

    • Eddie Biggar

      You sir, made me laugh.

    • http://thechive.com/ Award_Giver

      Awesome Monday comment award

      • The_Marc

        fuckin' WIN dude…

  • http://thechive.com/ mattythegooch

    For Free!!!!!!!

    I've got a sick gig in Tempe, that pays well!! Thanks though.

    • OpenID

      Cool starry bra.

  • Paula

    A warning to all potential interns: DO NOT APPLY! It's the Hotel California! You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave!

    Hugs,
    Paula
    – the troll you love to hate

    • Kyle Retrato

      I hope you get sexually violated by a baboon tonight.

      • Paula

        That would be AWSOOOOME!

        Hugs,
        Paula
        – the troll you love to hate

        • Rich

          hi I am a baboon. Please indicate time & place for violation…….

          • Paula

            anytime anywhere..
            my anus is always ready

  • James S.

    I live in Milwaukee and don't know anything about Photoshop. I feel like I still have a shot.

  • Job

    This makes me wish I didn't have a job with far superior pay and benefits already.

  • wyatt

    Where can I buy a chive t-shirt?

  • Stephanie

    I DON'T LIVE IN LA 😦 fml

  • slick

    "…it's actually very hard (and rewarding) work." – that's what she said!

  • Tee6

    😦 you need a Canadian office Chive!

  • http://thechive.com/ mattythegooch

    Actually, I'll work for theBERRY, and you can pay me in Super-Hybrid!!!!

  • Jimmy

    fuck my life on the east coast >.>

  • Dave23

    Question: Will it hurt my chances if I have to move in with John or Leo before I take the job? I make an awesome White russain

  • hot carl

    What's the likelihood a dude will be hired instead of a chick?

  • Mr. Falcon

    Please to be sending me my Chive t-shirt now.

    • TINY DANCER

      BYE PAULA AKA ALEC, YOU WILL BE MISSED BY YOUR FELLOW TROLLS, POUR OUT A LITTLE POTION FOR THE HOMIE.

      • https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=505737141 AJ Rantz

        Hold me closer!

  • http://topsy.com/thechive.com/2011/02/17/the-dream-thechive-needs-an-i/?utm_source=pingback&utm_campaign=L2 Tweets that mention The Dream Job: intern at theCHIVE : theCHIVE -- Topsy.com

    […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Tony Fioretti, Humor. Humor said: The Dream Job: intern at theCHIVE http://dlvr.it/Gs7Sz […]

  • yourappsucks

    well maybe the intern knows a little bit about app programing, maybe then they will fix the fucking iphone app

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