Daily Morning Awesomeness (20 Photos)

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  • http://www.facebook.com/eugenepark6 Eugene Park

    #13 damnnnnnnnnnn and O HAI again

    • mooseknuckle907

      I'd smurf that!

      • Gentlemensaurus Rex

        I'd smurf the smurf outta that smurf. She won't know what smurfed her

    • Fasteddy14

      She made my smurf smurf and then i smurfed on my smurf.

    • foul83

      Love her body…

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=659500467 Ryan Wooley

    #6

    Totally going on a t-shirt

    • Jen

      totally going on your fb profile pic

    • nick

      send me one

  • cjwhookid

    #7 Boner.

    • 484

      and Americans wonder why they're such a bunch of out of shape fat-asses…….

      • Brutal Deluxe

        And the rest of the world wonders why Americans think they're chainsmoking socialist dumbasses

      • 595

        Don't make us put down our beers and get off the couch…we'll kick your ass

      • The Chivery

        and the rest of the world wonders why they can't fuck with America the Olympics, basketball, baseball…don't say soccer, that shit is glorified track.

  • FROGINATOR

    FIRST!

  • http://www.indodreamin.com Avi

    #11 AMAZING.. really had me goin for a sec

    • me 2

      tomatoes are good for you

    • http://www.facebook.com/rabiskullmaster Dave Angle

      totally had me too!!
      Luckily I seen the green part of the tomatoe (I thought it was a strange tattoo)

      • Ian

        I thought it was a teeny tiny thong.

    • tralfaz

      Dat ass, oh

      • Dick Salad

        doesn't matter still fapped

        • http://www.youtube.com/user/ADHDavenger13?feature=mhsn Firefighter23

          Yeah sometimes I go up to my garden and beat off on the tomatoes. Wait no I don't, I'm an eggplant man.

    • Dr_StrangePants

      this is the most disappointing thing i'll see all day 😦

    • lonin

      I thought she had one hell of a sunburn.

    • MrAliasMan

      fooled me at first glance also. But still if it was real.. person has a friggen huge hand….

      • Jay

        Didn't even notice the hand.

    • http://www.thechive.com SmokeyMorgan

      Agreed. That would be one hell of a sunburn though.

    • 2drunk2frag

      #11 made me feel dirty at first, but now I just want to toss a salad.

  • SenorWilson

    #5 Why does that guy have so many old lady friends?

    • OhOkayThen

      cuz that's how he rolls, ninja!

      • ROllinDeep

        you F with me…
        YOU F WITH MY CREW

    • pablo_v

      he digs whats inside

    • amrith777

      Gotta say that there's a lotta win in this photo–pretty fuckin' cool B)

      Also–WILSON–At last I've found you!!! 😀

      • SenorWilson

        Found me? Why were you looking for me?!

        • OhOkayThen

          ugh do we need to go over this again?

          cuz that's how she rolls, yo!

        • amrith777

          Don't know what the person below me is referring to–but I was making a joke in reference to Wilson (your avatar) being lost at sea in the movie "Castaway"

    • Fasteddy14

      Apparently you've never had a blowjob from an Octogenarian… That kid is gangsta…

    • Kris

      Because that's how they roll in Romania, fool.

  • http://www.facebook.com/gordonsburgess Gordon Burgess

    #22

    As long as he doesn't go on the "balcony", I think he'll be fine…

    • Jed

      That chart is baloney.

  • http://twitter.com/Sanja_Knez @Sanja_Knez

    #2 om nom nom nom

    • Master_Rahl

      is that Krang? That's a devoted TMNT fan, if so.

    • Franklin1138

      Krang! "Arrgh-burbleburble-Shredder!"

    • Fasteddy14

      Wow, that takes commitment… That may be one of the coolest tattoos ever! TMNT for the WIN!!!!!!!!!!!

    • billycassidy

      that is amazing. KRANG! I want to see if the guy who did this has a pin head

  • laxcat36

    #12 I fucking love star wars!!!!

    • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

      This is Blake's 7 asshat.

      Hugs,
      Paula
      – "Paula is to Chivettes as DAR man is to awesome…"
      — LG – twitpic.com/5q3g21

    • AngryBrownAsianMan

      You mean star trek? 😛

      • Dogstrap

        C'mon, its Star Gate…

        • its_forge

          Naw, on Stargate the bald dude is fatter

      • derp

        Nothing gets past you AngryBrownAsianMan…

    • Dan

      God, now people are aping Paula's posts.

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        I rule 🙂

        Hugs,
        Paula
        – "Paula is to Chivettes as DAR man is to awesome…"
        — LG – twitpic.com/5q3g21

        • http://tube8.com Simon Phoenix

          yes. yes you do!

    • patov40

      That's Battlestar Galactica. You know, where the main character says, "To infinity, and beyond!"

    • equalizermax

      I think the movie is called Bambi, you bunch of idiots!

      • Ha.Ha.

        Wow, Max. As much as I hate your internet personality, this was actually a good comment. The first thumbs-up you've earned from me…EVER. Won't happen again, but I'm open to the possibility that you went back for your senior year and realized how big of a tool you were, so now you've decided to tone it down a little.

    • os99

      For Christ's sake, it's obviously a Star Wars prequel. The one with Lawrence Fishburne!

      • http://www.tube8.com Simon Phoenix

        It's not Lawrence Fishburne, it's Don Cheedle .. get it right!

    • A BiPolar Guy

      That's that bald alien guy from Babylon 9, right?

      • its_forge

        No it's Plan Five From Outer Space

    • drewggles

      totes mcgoats, its the guy from xmen final stand..or frontier..w.e, nerds

  • MrAliasMan

    #5 On this episode of Gangland……

    • http://www.gangland.com Simon Phoenix

      LMAO … That's the BEST COMMENT, yet!

  • jimbo.

    someone explain #19..

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=659500467 Ryan Wooley

      Beer

    • SenorWilson

      Cold Beer + Hot Shower.

      • Jak

        AMAZING!!!! Add your girl and you have a trifecta of greatness.

    • https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1064188593 Josh Gorter

      drinking while you take a shower, it's a subtle art of keeping your beer cold and free of water but it's possible.

      • jimbo.

        thrown off by the lack of a back-up beer. Got it now thanks!

    • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

      It's about drunk shaving. The kick is in the morning after effect when you look in to the mirror.

      Hugs,
      Paula
      – "Paula is to Chivettes as DAR man is to awesome…"
      — LG – twitpic.com/5q3g21

      • https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1064188593 Josh Gorter

        If you are drunk enough your blood has enough alcohol in it to act as an aftershave.

      • IBgenius

        I'm sure you're used to this Paula since you have to be drunk to look in the mirror.

    • theonehodge

      We call it a Jack Bauer (beer in the shower)

      • dirtysteve99

        sounds like cockney rhyming slang. people hate cockney rhyming slang.

        • drewggles

          concurred, what r u an irish gypsy?

    • Rfox

      Power shower, invented during a spring 10 years ago, gets you ready to go faster

    • patov40

      I don't know the chemistry behind it, but beer is good for you hair. Something with the ingredients mimics conditioner………………um…….I mean…….Yeah! Woo! Beer for breakfast baby! I can't get my day started without a cold one. Party on!

    • https://www.facebook.com/brandon.anyzeski Brandon AnyZesty

      Similarly, I like to drink while cleaning. I don't know why, because it's science, but this somehow maintains my concentration and I actually get shit done.

      • Blumpkin

        I like drinking, well, while doing everything. Especially driving! Can't beat a good road buzz.

    • Jordan

      Did this the other day, told i was weird …well whos weird now.

    • cody

      good' ol shower beer lol

      • asb

        i do this often. its like being in a jacuzzi.

        • Question

          Who the fuk stands in a jacuzzi?!

          • drewggles

            ur mom

            • drewggles

              trolls

    • rphilman1

      I call it a "brower".

  • xXbeermonkeyXx

    #7 i'll have 10 of those please
    with a cup of #10

  • Chris

    #19
    ???

    • Jim

      when you're older you will understand

      • DaddyD

        or when you stop living with your mother who won't let you keep beer in the fridge.

        • tralfaz

          or in the shower

    • mrraptorjesus

      clearly you've never tried drinking a beer in the shower if you have to ask… It is a good thing.

    • betalpha

      Not Sure if Drinking Beer In shower

      Or using as shampoo

  • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

    Hi mr. Happy "Joy Joy Bouncy Bouncy" Feet!

    #21 It's time you dropped the "Probably", my dear, just, cool, fierce and worshipped Chive admins!

    Anywaysies: we're almost there! See: twitpic.com/5q3g21

    Hugs,
    Paula
    – the one you love to hate

    • cubicman

      I love U 🙂 :-*

    • Guest

      Useless….only the `chivers` will use this retarded thing and they hardly get laid.

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        Agreed, Condoms for Chivers is like Bikes for Fish.

        Hugs,
        Paula
        – "Paula is to Chivettes as DAR man is to awesome…"
        — LG – twitpic.com/5q3g21

        • MooseMoose

          If that pic is of Paula, you have successfully combined my two favorite things.. the allure of sex and vagina's….. the condoms can go

    • JROC

      please tell me you watch Tosh.0 and saw that norma stitz bit? Gnarly

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        No idea what Tosh.0 is. Really. Will search youtube.

        Hugs,
        Paula
        – "Paula is to Chivettes as DAR man is to awesome…"
        — LG – twitpic.com/5q3g21

  • https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1064188593 Josh Gorter

    #23 this is not something you want to watch when you are drunk

    • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

      Or sober. Or a cat.

      Hugs,
      Paula
      – "Paula is to Chivettes as DAR man is to awesome…"
      — LG – twitpic.com/5q3g21

    • https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1064188593 Josh Gorter

      I think there is a photoshopped gif of this where the little girl is striking lighting down on the cat that is much more enjoyable to watch.

    • http://www.facebook.com/Cagekicker69 Paul Baumeister

      I almost seized…..

  • turbodude

    I love the little flash of ass ..
    #13

    • Dr_StrangePants

      I love the look of envy from the right

    • gaz

      fat woman is jealous

  • Codey

    #6 can someone make that into a gif

    • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

      Cool idea asshat, a .gif of the very same photo repeating over and over again…? Yeah, Nobel Prize winner for suresies!

      Hugs,
      Paula
      – "Paula is to Chivettes as DAR man is to awesome…"
      — LG – twitpic.com/5q3g21

      • Isaac Witmer

        Well since it's already photo shopped, it wouldn't be too hard to make it again, only slightly different (say killing Paula), and then merge it with the current one to animate it.

        But I can't be bothered to.

      • Brutal Deluxe

        It's going on your mantle next to your Nobel Prize for Social Diseases

  • cherrybomb

    #19 drinking a beer in the shower is good but not as awesome as in the bath… mmmmmm

    • http://www.facebook.com/ranDgallegos Randall Gallegos

      being that your name is cherry i can only hope you're a woman.

      • cherrybomb

        yep. i'm a 6 foot 3 and 318 pound woman with a neck-beard.

        chive on

        • Brutal Deluxe

          hawtt

        • Dr_StrangePants

          oh cherrybomb, you prankster ^_^
          ….stop fucking with my pipes

    • lonin

      Beer in the shower, Scotch in the bath.

    • JerkFace

      Fag!

  • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

    #18 the party don't start till he Walken!

    Hugs,
    Paula
    – "Paula is to Chivettes as DAR man is to awesome…"
    — LG – twitpic.com/5q3g21

    • https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1064188593 Josh Gorter

      What's better than Christopher Reeves? Christopher Walken

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        So, you a big fan of Mikey Wilson?

        Hugs,
        Paula
        – "Paula is to Chivettes as DAR man is to awesome…"
        — LG – twitpic.com/5q3g21

        • https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1064188593 Josh Gorter

          More a fan of his attitude and his freedom to be able say what ever he wants.

    • Ryan

      #18 I totally read that one in his voice.

  • Screwhead317

    #2 one of the best tattoos i have seen in my life

  • maclean

    #11 I see what you did there

  • joe

    #19 looks like it would not be a good combo at all

    • RamRod

      You need to access your priorities

      • Blumpkin

        FAIL!

    • CO_MTN_GRL2

      I agree, a shampoo/beer cocktail stirred with a razor sounds disgusting. :]

  • Spencer

    #19 Beer in the shower is awesome!!!

    • lsfjd

      If you really need to have a beer during a shower, AA might be for you…

      • Jak

        Nah, I don't smoke

    • Brutal Deluxe

      Just don't mix up the bottles

  • omgIcame

    #21 Yup, Candice Swanepoel probably would be the best fuck in the world. Look at those hips! DAAAAAAAMN

    • chicago

      definitely would free-ball her instead… and yes she'd probably would be the best fuck in the world

      • Sex Judge

        Uummm, no

        • lol

          bareback ftw

        • Alyssa's Pimp

          agreed. that would be Salma Hayek.

  • Jason Dean

    #21 – Tried to order, sold out in 10 seconds.

    • thetruth

      Will spend eternity in a nerdy chivers wallet.

    • TheBAMFinater

      Premature sell out?!?

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