Daily Morning Awesomeness (20 Photos)

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  • Shortie

    #9 how does he make that ring? And first?

    • Jacob

      I'm guessing the same way you make a smoke ring when exhaling cigarette smoke?

    • Nathan

      same as blowing a smoke ring

    • Ink-man

      This video taken at the Naval Academy Pool, hence the Big N on the bottom

      GO NAVY BEAT ARMY

      • WestPoint

        Wrong, it's GO ARMY BEAT NAVY

  • Guest

    Chive Sucks!

    • Dantheloser

      I'm guessing you've made a bet with someone to see who can get the most "thumbs down"s? Good news is, you're gonna win this way. Bad news: you're still a tool, I'm afraid…

    • http://twitter.com/Sanja_Knez @Sanja_Knez

      Obvious troll is obvious.

    • Frenchguy

      Still liking it enough to write it with a capital C. Thanks for the respect, cunt ( yeah there's no capital there … yeah it's not a mistake .. )

      • JamesHater

        Thanks for the respect? You must be the guy who does all the work at chive to make it great. Oh wait, you're probably just an idiot who associates himself personally with the site and think his comments are part of what makes it successful. What a douchbag you are….go hide in a corner or kill yourself, no one would miss you

        • Gnole

          lmfao…take it easy champ.

          • 9043

            well he's right……

      • Guest

        Thank you for picking up on that. If I were to refer to 'The Chive' and the chive it would be a reference to a vegetable.

        The Chive sucks because they are dishonest with their users. They takes pictures of women and photoshop 'Chive On' and 'Chivette' onto them to create the illusion that incredibly beautiful women are posting on this page. That in turn tricks stupid guys into buying T-Shirts in thinking that they'll have a shot with one of these women in return. 10 seconds of looking through nearly any posting will usually make this abundantly obvious.

        • Huh, huh?

          Or…people are sending them in photoshopped

          • Guest

            The Chive has been busted before on similar matters. They lifted a bunch of photos from some girl's blog, photoshopped Chive on her, and she denied that she released those images to The Chive.

            Another great example recently is a girl throwing up a peace sign with 'Chive On' 'shopped onto her fingers. If you study the image for 2 seconds you realize that it's not even her hand in the picture. The skin tone is way off and the position of the hand relative to the wrist and forearm is impossible.

            I don't like being treated as a gullible idiot. If you're okay with it, well, cheers!

            • The Chivery

              "I don't like being treated as a gullible idiot. If you're okay with it."

              Of course we are, we're Chivers.

              Chive on!

            • Chaos

              Can you provide physical evidence? Cause otherwise you're just slandering this site without being able to back up your claims.

  • James

    #3 how have i never thought of that? genius!

    • I'd do her

      Why is the green one always slutty?

  • ros

    Peace Love &Happiness!

  • ZAM ZUE!

    #3 The brown m&m wouldn't need paint…

    • alihater

      and no self respecting guy would eat it

    • Hunter X

      You're not supposed to eat the green ones either, but it might be time to make an exception…

    • Jason

      Exercise EXTREME caution if you eat the red one.

      • Big_Curt

        haha maybe thas y she picked to be the red one

    • Boom!

      is that racist??

      • thom

        Where is the yellow one?

      • chiveisracist

        this site is racist, if she was brown with no paint she wouldnt be here.

    • anonymous

      Melt in your mouth, not in your hand. Mmm.

    • Niggher Beater

      disgusting. who would find a brown woman appealing. sick.

      • Niggher Beater

        the reason i love the chive is because of it's lack of filthy brown women. chive on!

  • Magnus

    #12 I think.. she's staring at my soul…

    • dashete

      I think… you're staring at the wrong place…

      • Magnus

        I'm trying to focus on the positive, but It's right there…

    • ShakeyTheMoyle

      I was thinking the "Exorcist"….creepy.

      • amrith888

        Me,too…Looks just like Pazuzu

    • Guse

      Is her hand down the other girl's shirt? I can't tell if sexy or weird angle….

    • R2G Fan

      KILL IT WITH FIRE!!!

    • SARmedic

      Not sure if I am excited or scared. Scared.

      • Magnus

        Agreed.

  • Rose3191

    #2 I know what my next meal is!

    • https://www.facebook.com/lowzhongyan Low Zhong Yan

      But what happens when it's done? will the bread shoot out sideways?

      • xXbeermonkeyXx

        exactly, thats why you put a dish in front of the toaster. they serve themselves!

    • alihater

      lazy bitch

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000535958119 Radu Răducu

      THIS IS GENIUS

    • http://twitter.com/Pud_Divine @Pud_Divine

      i wonder how many people are going to burn their house down trying this

      • hMMMM

        toaster oven. $100 will save you that worry, plus no more microwave pizza.

    • holycraptheholygrail

      give this person a NOBEL prize for ingenuity..

      • burn victim

        Watch the grease… It WILL catch on fire, trust me!

  • Catence

    #2 – brilliant in its simplicity

    • Trent

      Both of you are idiots.

      • Sassy_

        idiots? this may change my life..

        • SevnOF9

          Wait till you find out that toasters urn off when you turn em on the side…..

          • the other Jen

            the metal bars will close smashing the cheese and bread and then will be stuck all over the inside of the toaster. use a toaster oven.

            • The_Dood

              Not all toasters have closing metal bars…

              • xXbeermonkeyXx

                mine does, and they dont actually touch the cheese, because the weight of the slice of bread pulls down the metal grill supporting it.
                and if the toaster turns off when its sideways, try tilting it back up a bit. works for me!
                cheers, beers

  • Tyler G.

    #5 Old school!

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=761074582 Jessica Condrey

      No clean bowls for cereal?

      Glass of cereal 😉

  • Tyler G.

    #2 Epic! Someone must try this and report the results. 😀

    • Trent

      You're an idiot.

      • Tyler G.

        Idiot? Something like this could have cured the cancer that I have had much faster. That's how fuckin' brilliant it is!

        • electrician

          toasters turn off when you lay them sideways fuckface

          • gels

            works a treat for me…

      • Frenchguy

        I guess you're still cleaning yours from that " ah comon it almost doesn't touch the side I think it should get out without any trou-…..fuck, i'm just gonna insult some dude on the web, that'll make me fell better, and who know, maybe my junk will get bigger … can't get any smaller any way "

      • Frenchguy

        I guess you're still cleaning yours from that one clever tought" ah comon the cheese almost doesn't touch the side I think it should get out without any trou-…..fuck,fuck, melted everywhere, can't take it out without getting electrocuted, and above all what will I tell mum about her toaster ?! I'm just gonna go say idiot to some dude on the web, that'll make me fell better, and who know, maybe my junk will get bigger … can't get any smaller any way "

        • coke

          obvious 12yr old is obvious

        • Tre Jay

          shut the fuck up. you're not funny.

    • matt

      just use a toaster oven

  • MikeOlmos

    #5 thats the only way I eat cereal

    • Ashley

      When it's a new box, you must eat a hell of a lot of cereal..
      ..unless you just eat the rest soggy

    • random

      got stuck in bookings once in nyc for something dumb, they gave us cereal at like 4 am with only milk and the individual boxes, and everyone ate them this way.

  • http://www.facebook.com/FlibseyEmma Emma Oliver

    #12 did anyone else hear tubular bells in their heads when they reached this pic?

    • alihater

      Why is there a dead fat hooker in your avatar picture?

      • wtfdoesthismean

        lololol

        but ahem sorry, i dont get this picture help me out?

    • The_Dood

      No, but I'll have it in my head for the rest of the day now.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=587208531 Benton McGrath

    #1 Forever alone

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=609752697 Peter Bergman

      Not! That's his girlfriend.

    • Guesty

      why would you do this on a public beach? fucking fat people man…

  • http://thechive.com ontherun1989

    You, sir, are an asshole. Now go find a better website to visit. Good luck!

  • caleb

    #3 I'd melt in their hand but would prefer in their mouth.

    • Stan_Dalone

      I want the blue one

    • Craigery

      They look like they're about 13-14 years old. MAYBE 16. You guys are creepy.

      • Stan_Dalone

        thanks. It isn't creepy, maybe perverted, but it is not creepy lol

  • http://thechive.com ontherun1989

    #2 Can't wait to try this. Also, you're welcome.

    • Frenchguy

      Best idea ever !! You deserve all the Nobel Prize in the world just for this.

  • dashete

    #20 I always thought they would just fight in a big dust ball.

    • Stan_Dalone

      yeah that's awesome

      • Stan_Dalone

        for years I watched the food get away and this is so cool finally they get their just deserves

        • BAH

          i also want to see the rabbit from the trix commercials to finally have his cereal

          • Molly

            Yeah, he just wanted some fucking cereal, asshole kids.

  • mid13

    #9 Navy men’s swim team. I could never figure out how to do that =

    • semperfi

      If it's navy guys, they probably learned it the same way they learn everything. By sucking each others dicks

      • Gentlemensaurus Rex

        The Few, the Proud, the biggest douchbags in the armed forces.

        • https://www.facebook.com/pctechjunkie429 Kyle White

          Say that to my fucking face, I dare you. Don't fuck with the Marines. I may not be one, but the only reason is medical problems preventing me from boot camp. I will still kick your ass if you ever, EVER, disrespect the Marine Corps. or any other branch, for that matter. If it wasn't for them, you wouldn't have the freedom to be in the internet right now. If you don't stand behind our troops, feel free to stand in front of them, so that they may run your ass over with a tank. GTFO.

      • matt

        Semper Fi… so you must love the Marines. It's a shame that you dislike the Navy, even though the Marines are a part of the naval service. These guys are also Naval Academy, so they commission to the Navy and Marine Corps. So for all you and I know these two could be future Marines.

        • OldManRiver

          Except they sucked each others dicks, so no

          • Stan_Dalone

            and old man that's the best you can do? you had to look it up in the book of trolling for dummnies?

  • Smurf_taint

    #12 is a succubus. That is all

  • SuperiorTo8

    #3 After this one, and the hot girl a couple of weeks ago that was covered in blue goo. I want to see a whole gallery of painted women. Is that an odd request Chive?

    • youGobble

      it is coming from a homo

      • SuperiorTo8

        Wow… You must be new to this whole, insulting people thing.
        Its ok. I'm sure we can find a nice quiet corner for you to practice in. Right next to Paula

        • justaguy

          hahaha…and no, that's not an odd request. I would like that too

        • Average Chiver

          nah, i agree with him. you are a pretty big knob-gobbler.

  • magicman5

    #14 ???

  • https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1064188593 Josh Gorter

    #12 at first I thought she had her arm down the girls dress.

    • Tyler G.

      That's exactly what I thought as well.

      • coop

        Cool story bro. I bet youre both totally not retarded

        • https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1064188593 Josh Gorter

          If you are going to call people retarded please get your punctuation right.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1320377412 Michael Bayless

    #12
    The girl on the left kinda reminds me of the little girl in the exorcist….

    • SheLovesCake

      I feel bad you have to bone that smog beast in your avat

  • Sven

    #22

    The fact that its the most popular sport all over the world accept for the US should explain just fine why you don't understand.

    • Trent

      • flavadave

        haha, THAT'S why. Still happens in American sports, just on a epically shorter basis.

      • gaz

        A few prick try to ruin the game so you write it off all together? you sir are a fool

        • Bill

          Only because a single touchdown counts 6 points, that doesn't mean there are more touchdowns in an average american football match than goals in a football match. And dives dont happen that often in football and most of the time, the referee recognizes them.

          • Anon

            an average football game will have 2-3 touchdowns per a team with a few fieldgoals… thats more then the average soccer game.

            There are also other areas where soccer is not the most popular sport. Canada for example. The main reason soccer is so popular is due to how easy it is to play(Just a ball and a flat area is needed)

            This debate is retarded though. I think hockey is the best sport in the world. The write obviously thinks soccer is. Congrats. I'll enjoy the better sport and you can have soccer.

            • Mojados

              "The main reason soccer is so popular is due to how easy it is to play(Just a ball and a flat area is needed)"

              Thats why dirty mexicans love it so much. Poor silly brown bastards

          • Mobius

            The average amount of goals vs. touchdowns might be close (with the edge going to American footbal), BUT, there are MANY more exciting plays during an American football game than there are in a soccer match. Long receptions, great runs, sacks, big hits, interceptions, acrobatic catches, etc. Soccer has only a few truly exciting moments in a mind numbingly long match. And please don't wax poetic on the intracicies of the game of which you will assume I know nothing about. That argument is tired.

            • Mobius

              *intricacies

            • P90

              Complete opposite is true actually, at least football is constantly on the move whereas US football it's start/stop/start/stop every second. In a superbowl final a few years back an American sports reporter worked out that even though it took up like eight hours of TV (Pre-game buildup/game/post-game reactions etc) there was only fifteen minutes of actual play in all that time.

              • Jak

                Thats because if they played non-stop your head might explode! Or a rugby game would breakout and we definitely don't want that.

              • Mobius

                Constantly on the move? So are tectonic plates but I don't sit around watching them. The magnitude of each down and resulting excitement in American football far surpasses the aforementioned time filling movement of soccer players. Each of the four downs is measured in its importance and value, and the time between downs allows for the fan to assess the situation and get amped up for the next play. Suspense, doubt, the unkown….it's all part of the experience and is heightened by any so called down time. Plus it gives you more opportunities to get off of the couch for more beer.

    • Catbra

      Not the most popular in Australia either. More interesting to play than watch but I would rather watch paint dry

      • Stan_Dalone

        Correct me if I am wrong , isn't Rugby way more popular in Australia than Soccor?

    • stabbyjack

      I love when the great minds of the Chive debate this.

      It's like trying to determine who's the smartest kid on the short bus…

    • Tobias

      John Cleese tells the truth.

      • JDB

        Love John Cleese, but sorry to say you dumbass Brits came up with Soccer. Also, I guess "Football" is more creative. Takes a lot of creativity to have a bunch of dandies running up down a field not scoring for over 2 hours.

        • derp

          90 minutes actually.

        • P90

          Don't get so defensive, the British also invented baseball and American football. (And tennis, boxing, golf, thoroughbread horseracing, football, rugby etc) In fact the only game invented in America is basketball, and that was by a Canadian.

      • peter puffer

        if its called football…and you play it using your feet to kick a ball…why is the ball you play with called a soccer ball? i play football and call the ball football, a game of basketball with a basketball, and baseball with a baseball…its not football, its soccer

        • Ikke

          I'l have to correct you there, Americans call it a soccer ball, because they call the game soccer, the rest of the world still calls it a football, and calls an american football an american football, even tho its not a ball.

          Football (or soccer if that's what you like to call it) was not invented by the brits, its an age old game, originally played with the head of an executed felon through the streets of a city, where it originally started, nobody knows.
          Later adapted by the greeks and romans as an actual game.

          In the majority of the world football (or soccer for the people that still don't understand) is the most popular game.
          Sure, Australia has rugby (thats where american football came from btw, but with rugby you don't have a helmet) India has cricket, and Canada has Icehockey, for those countries those are the biggest games, but not for the rest of the world.

          And John Cleese is always right.

          • Ikke is a dyke

            screw you IKKE canada has cfl, you moronic retarded idiot, we also have the NHL you idiot, but someone that thinks running around a huge felied like a bunch of lemmings iss a sport..seriously get your facts straight you retarded mroon

    • Bill Fuckin Murray

      Soccer is an activity that was originated by European women to help pass the time while their husbands washed their clothes in the river and did other domestic chores. Look it up!

      • coop

        Soccer is a womans sport….very soft and no real injuries

      • hahahahaha

        lol bill thanks for that

    • tyrese

      The average NFL player is "in action" during the game for less than 90 minutes….

      …in an entire season.

      That's some bullsh*t…

      • THIS IS MADNESS!!!

        'Merica cares about efficiency and intensity. Look, through a social mindset, at the atom bombs dropped on Japan in WWII. Boom, no longer "in action".

        • tyrese

          The Govt sure has that efficiency thing down…

    • soccersucks

      um yeah say what ya will, in the civilized world we play football and hockey, not kicking a ball around aimleesly for hours scoring one point..
      we believe in full contact sports here almost gladiator status..

      but have you ever seen an nfl player thats swedish ? nope..

      to delicate arent you SVEN

  • yoyo

    #3
    the Green one is mine.

    • dbolusaf

      u can have her, her dick is bigger than her adam's apple anyways

      • yoyo

        it is a joke about having the green m&m you nitwit

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