Daily Morning Awesomeness (20 Photos)

  • James

    #9 feline aids is born…!

    • FogHorn_LegHorn

      I say, I say it doesn't matter son he had sex

      • Honk

        FIV already exists….

    • Frank

      Cats have barbed penises. I'd bet this is a welcome change for that pussy.

      • DrROBOTO

        monkeys do too guy…

  • ddddd


    • Jimmy

      Nope! Chuck Testa!

  • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

    I'll just jump the queue here on the Chive dating thingy starting tomorrow, you know I need to or I'll never see any action so shut up.

    "Chive-loving, filthy troll, desperately craving for attention and with an often misunderstood sense of humor, seeks anyone with a pulse. No pulse but still warm is OK too, but I do have standards. Not very high standards, but still… standards… sort of. Am flexible about this."

    – the one you love to date
    – btw Bob: I want to #11 you for what you just did

    • https://www.facebook.com/GingaChris Chris Ginga Morris

      You be trolling every evening/morning.

    • Asylum joe

      Someone should go On a date with Paula and make a photo timeline and post it here…. Anyone?

      • nope

        Damit! I'll drunk enough to do it

      • http://www.facebook.com/xJAGGERJACKx Cristian Fabian Bustos Beckenbauer

        I'll do it for a dollar and bacon.

      • http://www.facebook.com/xJAGGERJACKx Cristian Fabian Bustos Beckenbauer

        I'll do it for free

    • :-D

      stop reading her shit already

    • Dr_StrangePants

      so after what…
      almost 2 years
      of impersonating one of the biggest hapless dorks to comment on the Chive,
      becoming the mascot-troll to Thousands of people,
      and PROUDLY maintaining said status,
      2 lleaked photos are bringing that all to end?
      …i'm not sure what to think, anymore -_-

      • Confused

        What the hell are you talking about?

      • Asylum joe

        Where are these Photo links???

    • varlotto

      *puts up phone hand sign to hear and mouths "call me"*

      • varlotto

        ear 😀

    • ididntbuyone

      monkey paula, is a shit

  • Seldi84

    Is that a monkey having sex with a cat?

    • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

      Well he DID score some pussy there…

      – the one you love to date

      • http://drumusicloudsounds.tumblr.com/ drummer113

        Not bad Paula. [Obama 'Not bad' face]

    • http://www.facebook.com/michael.heredia3 Michael Heredia

      If there is sex going on there, the cat is letting him do it.

    • http://www.facebook.com/will.moog Will Moog

      No. You're just drunk.

    • Rhayzor

      Looks consensual to me….

    • The Guy

      Doesn't matter, had sex.

  • kingsfan34

    #3 Who the hell would watch Episode 1?

    • http://thechive.com/ Paula_


      – the one you love to date

    • Pinche Manny

      Double Light saber scene's just about do it for me…..

    • Alan

      Seriously? Episode 1? Put some porn on that thing!

    • theyellowfever

      Someone more interested in swinging their own lightsaber. It's all…. part of the plan.

    • Levi

      Darth Maul DUH!

  • Cyberfunker

    #4 Great Parenthood

    • http://www.tube8.com Simon Phoenix

      flashback to Paula's childhood!

      P.S. I will look you up Paula!

    • https://www.facebook.com/GingaChris Chris Ginga Morris

      You gotta start training your daughter into sluts earlier otherwise they may think they are allowed to respect themselves.

    • SeeWhatIDidThere?

      Shes got a nice trunk as well.

    • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

      Is that a cat stuck under the front spoiler? Hehe. He.

      – the one you love to date

    • k-9

      roll models are very important.

      • rodolfo

        …so are role models!

      • Floyd

        I agree…people who model different types of breads are very necessary

  • WhopperNoOnion

    #14 The penguin is being the joker for halloween this year. isn't that nice.

    • 2SLOW

      I was going to post something quite similar but as you beat me to it I'll just give you a +1 instead

    • dashete

      Needs to be, at least, a little more serious

      • TheWorldMayNeverKnow

        Maybe an accident…Powder, Jelly, and two black eyes from own foopa assault while running to doughnut box.

    • 0_poo

      why so heart-attack?

    • Robert

      No fat jokes… they're wearing thin! HAHAHAHAHA!

    • Kenny

      I thought it was a Hurley Joker.

    • Tom

      I think he's about to turn into Violator!

    • Schmitty


    • Justin

      Why so Hungry????

  • LMFA...NO

    #19 "We Party Rock!"

    • Steamboat Willie

      Hidden smiley face.

    • Bluto

      Pretty sure that Hillbilly Jim moved to California…

    • Evil Dung Beetle

      *crash* OH YEEEAAHH!!!

  • bbqboobs

    #14 Violator: The teen years. These prequels are getting out of hand.

    • Robert

      Wonder how many young chivers won't get this…

      • Kris

        Spawnie Spawnie he's our man, if he can't do it no one can! Yaaaaaaaaaaaaay SPAWN! S to the P to the A to the Awn…

        • TheAndychrist

          That's pretty funny.

  • https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=579518913 John Andrew Jose

    #9 nature gone wild

  • TooGraphic

    #24 theres always a bitch who breaks it up when a pussy fight breaks out.

    • JAFitc

      Police dogs: We Serve and Protect.

  • DogHumor...Check!

    #13 Plays the Trombone

    • http://www.tube8.com simon phoenix

      LIke a mother fuckin' boss!

    • http://drumusicloudsounds.tumblr.com/ drummer113

      It's a mother f***in husky!

      • ThatGuy

        Did you censor yourself? What a tool.

        • http://drumusicloudsounds.tumblr.com/ drummer113

          Not sure if stupid or could tell I was trolling…


  • Chimosteve

    #12 My laundry still wouldn't get done…

  • bigcat72

    #9 see where all that cuteness got you! Now your gunna get it!
    When your done crying clean it up, ill be back tomorrow…

    • http://twitter.com/pezatsea @pezatsea


    • ThatGuy

      But why would you write this?

  • LittleTerrorist.

    #11 "I Keel you, Infidel."

  • Robozombiejesus

    Bitches love them hairless nips

  • http://twitter.com/#!/lawlessvictory LawlessVictory

    No joke, hit #2 and thought it was Iggy Pop's face.

    • http://www.facebook.com/will.moog Will Moog

      That chick is amazingly good. I was looked at that picture longer than I do lots of the FLBP pics. That means saying something.

      • Stan_Dalone

        agreed don't know what she looks like but dresses kinda hot

        • yeah

          her name is akiane. i have one of her originals in my house. my uncle is actually good friends with them. http://www.akiane.com/

  • DoingItRight.

    #6 One of the few shit heads not stealing VCRs in Louisiana.

    • http://www.tube8.com simon phoenix

      Well.. he is WHITE in the photo.

      Just sayin …

      • That's Racist! 0_o

        That's just the arm that was originally attached to the money.

    • https://www.facebook.com/GingaChris Chris Ginga Morris

      People use vcrs still?

      • DoingItRight.

        My point exactly 😉

  • http://twitter.com/#!/lawlessvictory LawlessVictory

    #14 is what they didn't show you about Hurley's time in the asylum.

  • swashbux

    Hagrid's doing pretty well for himself these days. #19

    • http://drumusicloudsounds.tumblr.com/ drummer113

      Not bad. [Obama Face]

    • JT Mo-Nay

      Hagrid? I see more Hillbilly Jim.

      • Bluto

        Agreed. Pretty sure he moved to California.

  • SenorWilson

    #15 And they make your wrist all sweaty! Curse you carnivals.

    • CarnivalDunkClown

      AwWwW Waterr!!!

    • http://drumusicloudsounds.tumblr.com/ drummer113

      I rip that shit off because I'm man and I found that if you pull the strap that's under the top banded part, it comes apart easily; I'm also a smart man.

      • LC

        Damnit I thought that was MY secret

        • http://drumusicloudsounds.tumblr.com/ drummer113

          Nah, great minds think alike.


    • Charlie_Cheen

      Also, when the person that puts it on you puts it on a little crooked, it rips out all the hair around your wrist.

  • dashete

    3# Might have your girlfriend thinking of Han Solo during sex.
    But shit, who doesn't?

    • http://www.facebook.com/will.moog Will Moog
      • dashete

        Are you, quite inaccurately, trying to correct me or canvassing for donations?
        Because I kinda have all my money tied up in other ventures right now so… yeah.

        • paul

          you wrote 3# shitface

  • Michael B

    #14 "Wanna know how I got these stretchmarks?"

  • Jesus

    #8 Cool pond, bro.

    • TDub66

      I like the especially cool half-police-car-rock too!

      • Flicka

        Tampa's Finest shout-out! WOOO!

  • Dan

    What kind of shithead takes a pic of this?

    • Dan


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