Daily Afternoon Randomness in HQ (45 Photos)

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  • tjk

    #6 hello!

    • tralfaz

      Why is she smelling her fingers with one hand on her butt?

      • Morgan Freeman

        She likes to smell her own farts?

        • tapsnapornap

          She drives a Prius?

    • chitownbaby

      where is #9

      • Stan_Dalone

        apparently this is an old soviet prison camp don't know the location I don't read russian

    • CaliSwag

      dont know why but its hott

    • QWERT

      #36 NIPPLE!!!!!!

      • 80890

        get a life. or get laid. either one works.

  • andy

    there's a whole mess of WTF happenin' in #1

    • http://renounceapprehension.blogspot.com/ MrRushing

      I like the shorts over the bodysuit. Means he's sensitive about his junk size exposure.

      • sooty

        Sorry to Hijack but did no one on the front page notice…..



        • Cletus

          This man is sharp. I had to look twice AND I LOVE NIPPLES!

      • theguyinthesuit

        not insensitive, actually it was a school hike and i was not aloud to run around without shorts on

        • Mr. Rushing

          I can see that. Teacher doesn't want you runnin' around with the beast exposed.

          • theguyinthesuit

            hahaha exactly

    • Jack

      TRON…What have you become?

    • Stan_Dalone

      some kind of new fetish?

    • NME

      The motha fucker's riding into Mordor. Of this I am sure.

      • theguyinthesuit

        sadly….i can not simply ride into Mordor

  • AssClown

    #6 Cartman: "Jesus mom, I love her moar than Cheesy Puffs!! Kitty's being a dildo again!"

    • Matt_tatt

      "i know a kitty whos sleeping with mommy tonight!"

    • https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=54203552 Steve Mergaman

      I read that in Cartman's voice….

      MOAR please

    • Frank

      Cocaine is a hell of a drug!

  • Matt

    Get a JOB….occupy something!

    • jasonsapunka

      My job has been sitting here waiting for the DAR. I like my Fridays.

    • http://renounceapprehension.blogspot.com/ MrRushing

      Maybe if we occupy ourselves first, then maybe we can change things for the better.

  • smith

    #21, #22, #23

    only on the chive could somebody spot a hot girl in a reflection of a dust storm, ask for more, and get gap.

    • getalifenoob

      Seen the reflection and sent in a picture asking for MOAR! they didnt use mine =(

    • Mike Morgan

      That dust storm was in my town.. I wonder if she goes to Texas Tech? Only on the Chive..

      • Squiggy

        That Texas Tech dust storm sucks compared to the Arizona Haboobs…

      • Seth Cole

        Red Raiders!! Guns up!

    • Ethan

      But that's why we all LOVE the chive

    • https://www.facebook.com/jason.ciotti Jason Ciotti

      Proof there is a God.

  • jasonsapunka

    #23 We need to get Emily a better camera.

    • Nickincollege

      And what's cool is that she submits pictures other than herself. A genuine sexy chivette.

    • Barry McKokkinner

      agreed. I totally approve the photos though. You look GREAT, Emily!

    • thegent

      We need to get Emily her own section!

  • kevguy

    #18 is clever

    • Kaiwatha

      I had planned on doing that for halloween… you can find tutorials for it on youtube

    • http://twitter.com/MikeyWins1 @MikeyWins1

      till she goes down on you….

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=623886367 Michael Alen Pugh

      This scared the shit out of me. lol… Pretty good job to whoever did the make-up…. OR IS IT?!

      • Angry Landlord

        I actually thought it was a pretty piss poor make up job compared to most on the internet. I did that a few years ago and I at least put some effort into it. Lame.

  • Tuff Guy

    #18 That's FUCKED up!

    • Bam

      I agree. I'm no OBGYN but if she closed her eyes it'd look like a cooch during the…special…time of the month.

      • Angry Landlord


  • http://renounceapprehension.blogspot.com/ MrRushing

    #8 – Maui Wowie…had to be said

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000855121698 Anthony Roybal

      Bra people act like no mo chicks on maui 2 bad 4 yall haha

      • Jules

        English Motherfucker Do you speak it!

    • nyclipper72

      She is stunning

    • Steven

      I need to island hop more from Oahu if there are more girls like this on Maui!!

      • Hawaiian Cletus

        There are girls like this on Oahu. Get outside more.

        • NickthedicK

          fuck both of you bragging mofos

    • Nolan

      Damn, wish I was laying on the beach with her now!!

    • A_Maui_Lovin'_Chiver

      Hopefully MS Maui is paying attention….
      What beach was this taken on?

    • DAS

      Did anyone else take a moment and try to look down her bikini bottoms ?

      • keepinitreal

        I had to wonder why they were so stretched out? Scratching? Playing? Fat she is sucking in for the pic? What does the photographer's hand smell like? What's the deal?

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1068611674 Mark Tuquero

      Maui"ian" here myself and yes we have ladies like this all over the aina/land.. Beautiful Wahine.

    • northerner

      'kini bottom fitting a little loose there, Love? Outstanding! Yes, as a matter of fact we did try to look in there! Need you ask?

      • http://renounceapprehension.blogspot.com/ MrRushing

        I thought that would be expected, especially from us Men. And even if she is sucking it in, she's still a stunner.

  • Kyle

    #45 Technically its 22 years old

    • bridgemaster

      i personally bet she just turned 21, and you're an idiot

      • Kyle


    • Leon

      not for 3 more months

    • mikey

      Looks 35 to me…

    • PieceofMind

      Technically it's between 7 weeks and 2 years old, depending on which rejuvenated cells her butt is considered to consist of. So yeah, shut up Kyle.

    • Mr. H

      fuck you, literally…

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=623886367 Michael Alen Pugh

      Saying it is technically 22 years old is no different than saying she is technically 22 years old. She is 21… so her ass is 21. End of Story.

    • Jen

      needs to stop cutting her own bangs.

    • schmielllssson

      wtf is with that tattoo???

      • Corwin

        It's Tank Girl, a comic book character.

  • tralfaz

    You should see her beaver.

    • Dirty Dingus

      Well done sir.

    • Tillman

      She's really cute, by the by…

    • mikey

      more please Chive……I would wed her in a heart beat and a date or 2

    • rocky tfs

      yeah that's a fucking riot dude…

      i was going to go with "hey rocky, watch me pull a hot chick out of my hat" but yours is much much better…

    • JpJ

      She just had it stuffed.

      • The Dream Is Dead

        i was waiting for the naked gun reference. Well done sir

    • Supertommo

      Looks like Ellie Harrison

    • http://www.twitter.com/apollorockit Apollo!

      Nope! Chuck Testa.

  • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

    #18 FTW, well done!

    C'mon guys! Who wants to date me? I'm quite drunk already and oh boy I feel sooooo vulnerable!
    <img src="http://www.supergoodtees.com/images/product/Drink_til_You_Want_Me_pink.jpg"/&gt;
    – the one you love to hate

    • Wesrup

      no thanks i dont swap teams JOHN

    • MammyNun3

      tits or GTFO.

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        Oh if you must…. Be gentle, I´m a bit shy…

        – the one you love to hate

        • Tyler

          When will I ever learn NOT to follow a link given by you Paula?

          • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

            Because half the time they're really worth it? Like this one: http://bit.ly/ogueJ7
            Or this one? http://bit.ly/fTtVEr

            – the one who just proved the 50/50 part

            • jdubya

              Damn… Paula, amazing links, all around, anybody who is this cool sadly must fall under the boy scout rule of D's…. No, wait, that's something else, I meant anybody this cool has to be fkn uglyyyyyy

            • chivesworth

              Haha. Excellent.

              • chivesworth

                I meant the links by the way

    • Paul_

      Fuck you Paula_!

    • Smeagol

      I will do it. I will take the ring to Mordor.

      • Stinky Cologne

        One does not simply walk into Mordor.

        • THIS IS MADNESS!!!

          If by Mordor you mean by Paula_, then yes. Yes you can walk into Mordor. Sorry Paula_, but it was too easy.

          • The Tick

            you're soooo goddamn unfunny…….

    • Stinky Cologne

      Ugh, go away. NO ONE LIKES YOU.

      • StinkyAftershave

        Ugh, go away. NO ONE LIKES YOU Either

        • Stinky Cologne

          I disagree. I'm fucking amazing.


      paula fuck off nobody likes u….U

      • THIS IS MADNESS!!!

        I do. Half the time it's funny or it's not. The other half it is meh, so it's nice to get a bit of variety.

    • DirtyNJ

      Sorry Dude I'm straight. As in, I like women. But Hopefully you find a nice dildo that has a good job and treats you nice. Because, judging by your personality most dildo's would smack the shit out of you.

  • elboberino

    #45 It's my b-day too! But I know you don't want to see my butt.

    • ChiverMeTimbers

      Happy Birthday…and yes you are right!

    • reznor

      Now elboberino. Don't be so quick to judge.

  • AssClown

    Land on a turd and devour some of that shit.

    Flies into bedroom and go straight into your mouth.

  • Balsac

    #28 The most epic gap ever.

    • Jak

      For perfect gappage refer to #23

    • Koolhaas

      Thank you for saying this

    • _maxPain_

      i'm guessing 3 finger gap,,so hard,,,,,2 tell

    • Barry McKokkinner

      heap on the praise Chivers, this is a great pic of an even better ass.

    • kayrock916


    • Bring It


    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000394146934 Jeremy Hughes

      i cant totaly see a little clamburger!

    • Salute My Shorts

      Occupy the Gap!

      • Harry Carry

        we are the 99%… all up in yo ass

    • steven

      i have always had a weakness for back-toe.

  • https://www.facebook.com/ionut.bornoiu Ionut Bornoiu

    Chive you just made my day when I saw that you posted my photo #15 from the Armin concert with the creepy guy staring back with the "Soon!" face :D

    • alysinwunderland

      It's even creepier now that I know that you aren't a hot chick. At least then there would be a legit reason for the creepy stare!

      • ChesterTheMolester

        you're a hot chick and i'm creepily staring at your picture right now.

    • TomTheCameraGuy

      Haha, didn't even notice the bomb. Good one

    • asot


    • http://twitter.com/latxxtal @latxxtal

      LOVE Armin! And even the creepy-faced guy who's probably rolling out of his mind.

      • Ha.Ha.

        molly, molly MOLLY

    • https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1672479500 Patrick Adamczuk

      Is it from the Amsterdam Dance Festival?

  • R2G Fan

    #45 Perfect ass…err…ending. Thank you !

    • Jeffzero

      one too many hands in this picture, possibly two too many. I think we need another pic, just as nice, with at least one less hand covering things up. Maybe two less hands.

    • http://en.gravatar.com/alexispysh Alexis


  • randomchiver

    #35 made me lol

    • cats suck

      they are possessed

    • Yo Mamma


  • disturbed

    #31 I hate when that happens!

    • Nathan

      You hate when Daft Punk shows up in a DeLorean? I love when that happens!!!!

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=623886367 Michael Alen Pugh

      when what happens? You get reminded of how cool it would be to be this guy. Yeah that happened to me too. lol

    • zuzus


      This is the chap who made it.

  • DaveK

    #18 has me creeped out a bit…..

  • jasgat

    #28… HOLY SHIT and welcome

    • Working Man


    • http://www.thechive.com GreyGhost9

      perfect lips

    • VanIsleChiver

      This babe has it all, the hump and gap and a bit 'o "toe"

  • Ron

    #3 Don't forget to stay over there.

    • Dano

      Don't forget to keep your small, lousy opinions to yourself!



      • Hawaii50

        Book'em Dano

    • lowdown

      obligatory pedo bear comment

    • DMAC

      I laughed. Sorry.

      • Stinky Cologne


        • PUNKYUPPIE

          yeah, i effin laughed as well, come on people that is good humor

          • M.M.

            laughed too, however, it was in a "no,seriously stay over there" type of tone.

      • Ha.Ha.

        Yup – laughed.

    • letterj
      • Guesty

        "yeah, but if we photoshop words on the pic and pretend it's user submitted, we could convince these retards to buy shit from the supposed best site on the web, so don't tell anyone it's lifted, K?"

        • I still Like it tho

          they've been doing that forever…..post a lot of chopped pics from those non-nude girl submit sites. Basically, almost everything with a typed font is bullshit.

          • Squiggy

            Who is to say that theChive guys are the ones trying to pull the wool over everyone's eyes? The problem with you critics is that you assume too much. Is it not possible that some basement dweller finds the basic picture online, attaches the script and then submits it to the unsuspecting Chive staff?

            The only reason I question them, however, is the fact that when they were looking for another intern, they pimped how bad the newbie would need photoshop skills. Would love the hear theChive guys weigh in on this one sometime…

        • Jen

          and yet you still come to this site, even to bash it. It's amazing how much you hate this site and the people, and yet you TORTURE yourself for hours everyday. I hope you're not doing it for our sake, b/c your shit is growing old.

    • Antonio Gates

      She can hop over my fence anytime!

    • nathan


    • Amin

      Stay here in Mexico, with me!

      • SanDiego

        ………………aweful lot of honkeys around here………….

    • : /

      haha being a prejudice douch is super funny right guys

  • mark forum

    #28, #44, #45

    as a fellow blog owner i gotta tip my hat to John a bit. Between the charity stuff, the HQ DAR's and SC, he is living up his billing as an elite blogger. keep up the good work

    • The_Dood

      Thank you for not advertising your own blog. Stay classy m'good sir.

  • https://www.facebook.com/bowieowens Bryan Owens

    #29 is EPIC

    • Mike

      Best pic of the week!

    • Dirk Diggler

      only someone with a child of similar age can understand this pic!

      • ZachBob

        Well, when I was his age, I was just like him. Thomas the Tank Engine was (and still is) the best thing ever.

    • Anon

      Agreed. If you have a train fan in your house, Thomas is EPIC. Cute pic.

    • Stan_Dalone

      tons of precious right there

    • Althing

      That is the cutest friggin' picture ever. I have a lil boy about that age and that is just an awesome pic.

    • bdg

      The Greatest day he's had yet!!!!! Thomas rocks!!

  • sheoncebelieved

    #37 he probably wasn't any good, just the longest tenured teacher in the district and probably the union leader. we all know there aren't any good teachers anymore

    • JDB

      Ya, I hear you buddy. Those fat-cat teachers… We need to cut their pay even more and get rid of their pensions. They should have to earn their money like those poor Wallstreet Bankers.

      • Markus

        Right on. Who needs teachers these days anyways? We have the internet and the internet knows everything.

    • The_Dood

      I actually had teachers in high school that when I woke up in the morning, not wanting to go to school… I would think to myself, wonder what he is going to do today? And peel my ass out of bed to see. I have never had another teacher that gave me a reason to want to go to school, although there were a few other outstanding teachers there as well.

    • Gramps

      Maybe where you live. I had some fantastic teachers.

    • goodnuf

      You're an idiot. "an effective teacher is the single most important school-related factor in raising student achievement, it is clear to see the critical role that outstanding teachers play in shaping our country," said Lowell Milken, chairman and co-founder of the Milken Family Foundation. "We created the Milken Educator Awards to proclaim in a very public way that greatness in education must be recognized and rewarded."

      • bridgemaster

        Looks like somebody's a teacher.

        • M.M.

          …..and probably shitty like the rest. Had some good Professors in college, but for the most part, teachers are people who couldn't find out what they wanted to do, and figured summers off was a decent gig.

      • Just sayin'

        At least he has his own thoughts

    • insonh

      Obama got a noble prize for doing nothing so i would put much into teachers getting a big ass check.

      Liberals love giving each other prizes for stupid shit

      • Markus

        "so i would put much into teachers getting a big ass check"??? And it's spelled "Nobel," as in Alfred Nobel, not "noble," as in dignified.

        Looks like your teachers certainly wouldn't have deserved this award.

      • its_forge

        Teachers get paid jack shit for doing a job that you'd fucking shoot yourself in the face if you had to do it for even one day. So please, please, step the fuck off and stop listening to those pathetic assholes that parrot those goddamn right wing talking points.

        • Yup, that happened.

          Well, I'm a teacher, and a am most definitely right winged. That's pretty biased to assume that noise.

          • its_forge

            Oh so you agree with the original poster that teachers are all entitled, lazy assholes who are overpaid and get hundreds of vacation days per year and still all whine ceaselessly about having to do their jobs.

        • Guesty

          "step the fuck off"… you're so street.

          • truthserum

            Oh Guesty – where were you when the fat Chivers first waddled down into the basement and used their fat sausage fingers to type bullshit to LG and defend honour everywhere?

            I;ve been banned at work from commenting so Godspeed.

        • MEOIT1

          I think everyone has a job that would make another person want to shoot them selfs in the face. But that was their decision to become a teacher it wasn't forced appon them so I have no respect for the poor me story.

          • its_forge

            Just as you should have respect for soldiers who put themselves in harm's way to protect our republic, you should have respect for teachers who put themselves in harm's way to provide for its future.

        • sheoncebelieved

          paid jack shit? have you seen what they get paid in Cali…and they get 3 months off an every holiday under the sun….they're over paid, they know what they're getting into, it's not like they're forced to teach

          • Jack

            You don't know what you are talking about. I was a teacher for five years until I quit to take a 9 to 5 job. I chose to teach because I wanted to teach – not because I had no other options. My starting salary was around $19,000, and that was just 15 years ago in the Saddleback District in South Orange County, California. And vacations? I worked during them to pay off debt I incurred going to school to get my credential and to supplement my meager income. It was the toughest job I've ever had – I was constantly working. Teaching is one of those jobs where there really is the potential to work nonstop – you have to figure out where to draw the line, and no matter where you choose to draw that line, you feel guilty about not doing enough. At least, you do if you haven't reached complete burn out from dealing with ignorant dickheads. The only thing that made it at all worthwhile was the knowledge that I was actually making a difference.

            Now I'm a programmer – I work normal hours, get paid four times as much, and my vacations are actually vacations. I miss teaching in the classroom, but I do not miss all the other crap that goes along with it. The closest I get to teaching now is volunteering in my daughter's classroom. My wife was a teacher, but now she's a principal, and she also works non-stop. She loves it when I point out to her that she could make twice the money and work half the hours by working somewhere else. But then, she's actually dedicated.

            My grandfather was a colonel in the marines before he became a teacher. When he was still alive, I would see old men come up to him and say "Mr. DuBose, I was in your English class back in 57. Thank you." I've had a few of my former students contact me through Facebook or whatever to give me similar praise and it almost makes me regret my choice to leave the classroom. And then I see shit like your post and it reminds me why.

          • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=623886367 Michael Alen Pugh

            I think they meant the average teacher. Besides… it isn't like they are getting a paycheck during the summer… at least not any of the teachers that I have ever known. Sure they aren't forced to teach but thats with pretty much any job, otherwise it would be slavery. SO they should certainly be paid much more than they already do, because to me that's a damn important job that only a select few even consider doing.

            • ZachBob

              The CA teachers I know get paid during the summer, but only because they get money held from their checks the rest of the year. So they only really get paid when they work, but their employers understand that a summer without pay is jacked up, so they make it work.

          • Chaos

            In the school district I live in, teachers start out at between 30K and 35K. And that's before taxes.
            Overpaid? Yeahhh… I don't think so.
            What I do think is that you're an asshole.

          • its_forge

            They work most of those holidays and get no paycheck all summer. Averaged out over the 12 month period and over the total number of people in the profession, they get less than almost anyone else who goes into their profession with a (usually required) 4-year or postgraduate degree.

          • Corynnia

            I don't think you can get overpaid trying to turn our future generation into something other than the technology-addicted, illiterate morons they would become without dedicated teachers.

        • j22

          Actually they get paid a livable wage and only work 9 months a year. Tons of holidays during the work year as well. Just sayin…

          • its_forge

            Already addressed, and deemed a moronic kneejerk talking point by a couple of people, but thanks for playing.

        • sheoncebelieved

          nobody's forcing them to teach

          • its_forge

            Much in the way no one forces policemen, firemen, Marines or soldiers to do what they do either. Your point?

    • ShitheadTeacher

      what happened you got passed over as a lame teacher ,so now you have to take it out on the one who is a decent guy?

    • bemilm

      Poe's Law

    • http://www.facebook.com/jake.lemaire Jake Lemaire

      Fuck you there guy. My mother has been a teacher for 17 years here in the state of Texas, a state that DOES NOT offer tenure for public school teachers. She works her ass off for a shitty salary. Teachers are an extremely valuable resource and should be treated as such. I never participate in silly internet arguments but your statement has enraged me sir.

      • rabble

        fuck your mom with mid-evil devices, I care not

        • McBeastie

          Mid-evil? You sir could use a good teacher.

          • northerner

            Indeed! But maybe he was being charitable. He didn't advocate using high-evil or low-evil devices. He must be a moderate. Then again, this discussion was obviously beyond him.

      • sheoncebelieved

        Go here: http://www.breitbart.tv/the-real-class-war-jimmy-
        and ask your mom what her union fees are doing after you watch this video.

        • its_forge

          Ha, that has the word "breitbart" on it so *automatically* nothing under that link could possibly be true. The guy is so reality challenged that if I had water pouring down on me from the sky and Breitbart told me it was raining I'd check for myself and then phone the National Weather Service to verify. **Nothing** Breitbart has *ever* said publicly is true. *Nothing.*

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