A low down dirty good time (30 Photos)

  • Dan

    #30 I bet that got some laughs on Monday morning at work.

    • thedix

      full story pl0x

    • Phil
      • Tristlo

        "The darting dildo drama"


        • absoluteretard

          But where did it come from?!

    • http://www.baratilla.com Jay

      Mr Skumavc had difficulties describing the tearaway toy in detail.
      "I don't have a massive experience with dildos," he said.


    • agentshags

      the upper right hand corner article is a nice touch to compliment the cover story, lol. "WIN this pearl necklace!" 😉

  • Stig

    what the fuck #30

  • Still_Counts

    That is just plain dirty and fun. If you know what I'm saying. B)


  • wolowizard

    Not first, damn.

  • Stan_Dalone

    #1 is awesome #27 is pretty fuckin funny

    • bdg

      #1 looks like a cheap douche!

      • Spencer_on_Fire

        That's one hell of an orgasm

      • Jak

        Water…it gets chicks wet. No, literally.

  • Robert

    #10 Kentucky Jelly, number one export, besides pot.

  • DaveK

    #5 is great!
    Find HER!

    • Stan_Dalone

      can't just a pic that has been around the web a million times

    • colin

      Looks like Lucy Pinder to me

      • NO colin

        That is clearly not.

        • Gaysexyboy

          Yes it is, you are a wrong person. lier stupid stinky man it is Luky Ponders, kay little dumb ugly fat man. know you know, don't say a stupid thing again after this. Never be so gross as you were in your stupid stupid comment above. know you must have needs to go shiit yourselfs pants, bacuuse you are fats man.

    • The_Dood

      Just google NSX. You'll find her. Or were you talking about the nice lady?

    • mamt71

      I actually know this girl personally haha. her name is Alexis and she from the Czech Republic, i'd link you to her Facebook page but i don't think she would like that, ill post more photos. lol

    • Skagen
      • http://twitter.com/pyrosis pyrosis


    • ImpressMe

      Women with fat ankles should not wear those stockings….meh.

      • Dude

        You are possibly the dumbest cunt I've seen on this site.

    • kharen

      my best friend's aunt makes $70/hr on the laptop. She has been out of work for 6 months but last month her check was $8183 just working on the laptop for a few hours. Read this site NuttyRich.cöm

  • blub_glub

    #27 indian food – i feel ur pain ..

  • Mouchette

    #3, that’s why I just use my mouth.

    # 23, thank you O captain my captain.

    • beat rice

      #3 and because of it i just don't wash 'em

    • Hidden Agenda

      # 3,There is to a straight way, have your wife wash it !!!!!

    • VanIsleScott

      just peel the freakin thing

  • Stan_Dalone

    #5 is hot #13 is cruel and unusual punishment #23 Robin Williams is always funny as hell

  • benjinho

    #5 , watch your back

    • panama99

      #10 or this guy might be there waiting for you

  • Anjin-San

    #18 srsly?

    • ROK247

      reminds me of a gal i know.

    • Eh.

      This is not what I found when I typed "two finger squirter" into google.

  • doobie

    #29 so how do I down grade?

  • Black6dog

    #23 Is it just me or is Robin Williams the coked up version of Bill Murray?

    • loso

      No because Bill Murray can make you laugh just by looking at you.

      He’ the Chuck Norris of comedy

      Robin Williams isn’t funny anymore and hasn’t been for a long time. I will give him this, one hour photo and insomnia showed me that he’s way better as the creepy serial killer guy than he is at being the funny guy

      • hMMMM

        Robin Williams is the shit, so take your opinion and stick it up your ass.

        Mrs. Doubtfire, Bicentennial Man, Good Will Hunting, Man of the Year, just to name a few.

        • Ksinz

          Really, Bicentennial Man? Your using that as a example? Did you see that movie or are you just naming random things? At least say Good Morning Vietnam.

          • Ramrod

            Bicentennial Man?! Did you miss the whole "Mrs. Doubtfire" reference?

            • hMMMM

              No homo Bicentennial man was awesome…have a heart!

              And if you didn't enjoy Mrs. Doubtfire, you're just a miserable person. It's ok to like non-macho movies, fellas.

        • beat rice

          yeah dude good will hunting left me in stitches

        • http://www.facebook.com/ranDgallegos Randall Gallegos

          you forgot "RV", say what you want but that movie was hilarious

          • Tucker

            i just thumbed you down because you suck.

        • Logan O

          I personally enjoy Patch Adams but maybe thats just me. Oh and Jumanji

    • JEB

      Classic military post…I'm going to say Fort Drum

  • Fark



    • dpy

      Army wives

      Just like the show but they are all fat.

    • Negron

      This is definitely at the DMV, the place is a haven

      • the other Jen

        that is one hell of a FUPA

      • fge

        You've apparently never been to on base medical facilities…this is exactly what it looks like.

        • SIUADO

          Freakin' nailed it!

    • cliqueded

      Dude, don't even joke like that.

  • Fark

    Not nice Chive, ur screwing with my head


    • http://www.thechive.com GreyGhost9

      that should be under nostalgia post, that was most of our childhoods. Damn Dial up

  • Iam_Dave

    #3 is true.
    A cucumber is worse.
    A zucchini you have to make sure no one else is in the kitchen watching. lol

    • Steamboat Willie

      Unfortunately you are wrong good sir, the straight way to wash a carrot is to give it to a woman.

  • xXbeermonkeyXx

    #3 LMAO!
    #28 i see it has a balancing problem

    • P90

      It's actually normal to have one lower than the other.

    • Dan

      Q: How's it hangin'?
      A: A little to the left.

      • The Chivery


    • Scooter jennings

      She must be right handed

  • theyellowfever

    #9 You know the system is broken when….

    • Anon

      You know society is broken when…. Seriously who walks by some woman injured on the ground and doesn't offer help?

    • Jabo

      I'm actually from Niagara Falls, and that's the hospital i have to go to…and yeah as disgusting as something like this was…wasn't that surprising, coz the NHS that runs it (Niagara Health System) are f'n idiots!

    • Guesty

      It was me, I was the one who told her to call the ambulance. Stupid bitch shouldn't have fallen in the first place. Fat cunt.

      • #1 Guesty Troller

        See guys? This is a real Guesty troll, so all of you who are doing it wrong please stop – I got this.

        Remember the comment about the cancer lady who refused treatment….?

        • Brother Maynard

          Get a life.

          • Guesty

            I'm ok with being a "loser", actually. So what else do you suggest?

  • gdarkcloud

    #25..that's just f#$%# gross.

    • The_Dood

      I think you mean AWESOME.

    • LC

      certain things you just can't unsee…

    • Jen

      got a good laugh at the bloody nunchucks lol

  • https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1485290783 Marcus McConnell

    #1 Just bought my FIRST shirt from the Chive!!! 'Bill FUCKING Murray' !!!!! This is how I feel!!!

  • Mr,Guest

    #2 Your average Chiver.

    • Guesty

      It's MEEEEE!!!

      • Guesty

        When I'm not trolling the Chive, I like to get a little fance with myself. DON'T HATE!!

        • Guesty

          You can't even spell right when you copy my name! Stop!!! 😥

          • #1 Guesty Troll

            Guys, please? Let me do my thing man…all three of these were super weak.

            • Guestytheass

              ok ok so I'm an asshole so what

              • Logan

                Guys, relax. You're all equally unfunny.

  • honesttruth

    #29 She must be the `real` girl next door (chivette) the fanboys keep dreaming about.

    • dishonesttruth

      that's Paula and you know it

    • Truth

      Last time I let the wife leave the house in broad daylight…..

    • Ha.Ha.

      she's someone's girl next door…

    • PunkRockMohawk

      Eh, I'd bang her…

  • bigcat72

    #22 I laughed a little more then i ment to… but still fun

  • zingman

    #11 Typical Chivette

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