This Mediterranean Mansion comes equipped with a life that doesn’t suck (30 HQ Photos)

Post found via twistedsifter

Listing price: $13,450,000 (USD)
Bedrooms: 5
Full bathrooms: 5
Partial bathrooms: 4

Unique amenities:
– Oceanfront/Waterfront
– 8 open porches
– Outdoor pool with waterfall
– Private elevator
– Rooftop garden/terrace
– Movie room
– Painted murals throughout
– 2-story office

I’ve already put away 75 cents towards buying this house. It’s gonna happen.

  • Stan_Dalone

    Buy it and they will come? 13.4 million? pocket change, everybody into the pool

    • paula_pissflap

      no thanks what about a grand mason?

      – the one you love to hate

    • Sergio

      Screw that place. Let's pool in for Porta Bello in California!!!

  • gutterville

    For $13 millionn could do with more bed rooms.

    • nate

      for what? How many gutterballs from gutterville are you really going to have live with you??? this isn't a place for a wife and kids either…this place is meant to steal pussy every morning, afternoon and evening. it's got 3 kitchens so 3 different chicks can make you 3 different sandwhiches at once…1 bedroom works well for me

  • mooseknuckle907

    Kitchen looks awesome
    #19 and #20
    These look awesome as well

  • Dan

    If I ever win the Powerball, I'm buying a place like this.

  • Kris

    *sigh* I probably couldn't afford the taxes on that place. Hell, I probably couldn't afford the utility bills!

    • PubicJones

      You couldn't broke dick.

  • AAA

    Comes with everything but a sense of taste…

    • Mike Hayward

      I don't think it's garish enough…..needs more gold trim

    • tom

      Its rich people's taste, you wouldn't understand.

      • aaaaa

        With a name like Tom, I'm sure you wouldn't either. There are no rich people named Tom, only geek squad employees and teachers.

        • SkyVader

          Tom Brady
          Tom Petty
          Tom Jones
          Tom Hanks
          Tom Cruise

          • the other Jen

            what about Tom from Myspace, i wonder if he's rich…

          • aaaaa

            Thomas Brady
            Thomas Petty
            Thomas Jones
            Thomas Hanks
            Thomas Cruise

          • Lev
          • etcrr

            Well said SkyVader

        • bbbbb

          Tom Cruise? Tom Riddle?

      • BleedC&B

        agree bro. that house is perfect

  • エリツク

    The things I would do for this.
    Especially considering I write this from my tiny, overpriced apartment in Japan that has a large block of wood for a bed.

    • SanDiego

      oh, how interesting. Do tell

  • Sean

    #6 I think I'll go have a sit in my antique chair…in my bathroom.

    • Shant1k

      If you click the secret button under the chair it'll wipe your ass for you

      • Sean

        oh, if only that sort of technology existed.

  • Abie

    ¿Mediterranean? There is nothing so ugly in the whole Mediterranean Region. I'm sure.

    • Guest

      ugly? are you retarded?

    • Jadiwin

      That's because it's in Sarasota Florida

  • Bubba

    #29 Only two bottles in the wine cellar? I'm out!

  • fore skin

    They are more inviting than them modern stark rooms. How do I get one given?

  • ChaseTheWalker

    Sooo is it in the Mediterranean? Or Florida? Either way I'm not interested unless it has 6 bedrooms.

    • tylrd67

      Assuming that one of several walk-in closets is bigger than your current bedroom you can sleep in there.

  • Ben

    A prime example of what people with too much money and no taste can do…

  • Maddog68

    #25 Not the best place to keep your fish tank!

    • Kevin Hulett

      Why's that?

      • ShoopLePoop

        might bump it with a pool stick?

        • amrith777

          Or a stray Masse shot attempt

  • DanielB

    WTH does private elevator even means if it is a house?

  • loso

    Built by a 1% who employed a lot of 99%

    good for him

    • A BiPolar Guy

      Maybe though there are other ways to get rich. The question is did he do it by paying less than a living wage, offering no health care or retirement, cheating and skirting the law at every turn, taking corporate welfare etc? Don't tell me it's a free market, workers can take another job, competition fixes everything or everyone can start their own business (obviously impossible) . That notion of simple ideal free-market capitalism is inaccurate. There are many complicating factors – transportation, lack of training, anti-union laws and more that limit the worker and customers ability to play their role in the ideal system (Idealistic communism never worked either and is worse)
      The gap between rich and poor is huge and more importantly is growing. The system is rigged, not fair.
      One of the biggest things ticking people off is the simple fact that financiers world-wide scammed customers with junk investments, bankrupted their companies when they collapsed, got bailed out with tax money, and then got huge bonuses for their excellent work.
      This the most recent and blatant example but is hardly unique. Oh but help out the unemployed or those who lost homes by the mess these guys made? Hell no, let'em pay the price for their lazyness!

      • Smuggler

        Shut up.

        • A BiPolar Guy

          oh well, never mind then. Viva la "job creators!"

  • ddd

    this place would be lonely without many naked models

    • etcrr

      if you have the money to buy and own this. The naked models will come in droves. You would have to fight them off

  • Ling

    #15 statue of buddha looking over the room doesn't approve of #14 shrine of dead animals.

    • McBeastie

      And why is Buddha sitting above a cross?

      • amrith777

        I'm guessing because the message of Siddhatha and the message of Jesus are not mutually exclusive…..But–at first look–I agree–it can be confusing.

  • Mido

    The house is amazing. Though I don't really like the decorations…

  • Ferret

    #14 .. a game room?

    • Ace V., P.D.

      This is a lovely room of death. Take care now. Bye Bye then.

  • just sayin'...

    there's no bitches….where are the bitches??

  • tdr

    Too much money, too much spare time, no taste. Recipe for grotesque.

    • lonin

      It's a tad oppressive isn't it?

  • larf

    if all us chivers kicked in a buck we would have a place for the next meet up chive on world wide

  • steve

    Located off Higel Ave on Siesta Key, not far from Shell Road. I used to go to the public beach access on Shell Road.

    • SanDiego

      cool directions, bro

      • ChivettefromGA ;)

        Try "Located in Sarasota, Florida, this 13.45 million dollar house is outfitted with an incredible pool (complete with a waterfall) and many other…"
        Directly quoted from the top of the very first photo….

  • chitown chiver

    First thing I'd do if I bought this would be to throw a massive fucking chive meetup

    • Brutal Deluxe

      You'd never get all the semen off the upholstry.

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