Daily Morning Awesomeness (25 Photos)

  • Still_Counts

    WTF!! #10

    • Wet_tosti

      Keep calm! I'll hit it with a newspaper.

    • U R Still_adouchebag


    • MattKL

      Christ I hope it's photoshopped. Either way, the stuff of nightmares.

    • amplidudes

      That is what happens when we all are in sleep.

      • http://www.myspace.com/theamericanmaniacs BentWrenches

        I don't know about you,but i usually sleep with my eyes closed.

    • P_Dutch

      Puts the saying "dead in the blink of an eye" into a whole new perspective.

    • BType13X2

      And I now have new nightmare fuel.

    • Jade

      This is most obviously photoshopped. The reflection of the bee on the person's eye is awful. Nice try though.

    • jrey81

      aeon flux upgrade

    • Tuff Guy

      I'd rather be tea bagged by Larry the Cable Guy…

      I'd rather stick my head in Rosie O'Donnel's boxers… While he's wearing them.

      • http://www.tube8.com Eat_Poop

        I see what you did there.

    • BPD exFiles

      Fuck ALL of that noise!

    • Cudaman

      Heh, I got a piece of metal in my eye and it started to rust. When I got to the ER they numbed my eye, strapped my head down, then had some tool to keep my eyelid open and brought out a 10,000 RPM dremel to drill the rust spots out. All while I was a wake.

  • Me.

    #22 Want!

    • Dr_StrangePants

      obviously not worried about cats

      • Me.

        the only "worry" i have about cats with this house is jumping close to one and sending it soaring through the air 🙂

  • nick339123

    I ain't gravity's bitch! #14

    • beat rice

      All right everyone.
      TH- NOPE!

    • Underbaker

      I stand alone, all by myself. (as you get older you remember lyrics for everything)

  • Crispy

    #22 Jerry Sandusky's House (too soon?)

    • agm

      too soon…and too funny…

    • Diggler

      Or too late…

      • Booya

        …like Paterno late to the police station?

    • down with psu


  • Anonymous

    It would be a shame if 7 was PhotoShop

  • BaltimoreChiver

    #10 NO, NO, NO.

    • AAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!


    • etcrr


    • Dr_StrangePants

      Hell to the No!

  • nate

    #13. God I hate you.

    • Rudy

      nate = total hater doucherag

      • nate

        hahhaha. dudes married, how am i the douchebag.

        • Mister

          How does being married stop anyone from being a douchebag, you can be a douchebag regardless of being married.

          Simply for your comment nate, you are a douchebag

          • http://www.facebook.com/nate.petrovick Nate Petrovick

            cause hes married and took a celebrity to the ball. how many of you have wives that would be okay with taking a celeb to the ball. cause if so… well you know the rest.

            • Don Joe

              Are you really that insecure? Guess what? My wife wouldn't mind if I had the chance to take a celebrity to the ball. If she were a Marine and had a chance to take a famous celebrity I wouldn't mind either. Why???????

              Because I'm secure enough in my relationship to know that she's not going to fuck another guy. Why? Because I trust her. If she ever did? So what then I get to be single and chase tail again. Are people really so insecure in their relationships that they would deny their partner some fun and the chance to hang out with a celebrity?

              • NIUChiver

                That isn't Sgt. Scott Moore in the picture. That is just another random Marine who took a photo with Mila. Google the event and you can see it is two different Marines.

            • http://www.tube8.com Troll_the_World

              Hey dumb ass .. THAT ISN'T THE GUY THAT ASKED HER! FYI .. it's another Marine. Go ACTUALLY LOOK THE god damn PHOTOS with the marine THAT ACTUALLY TOOK her to the ball.

              P.S. Bitches love balls.

              • Jim

                Every pretty girl deserves to go to a ball

            • Matt

              My wife would not care if I had the opportunity to take a celebrity to an event. If she was able to get one of her favorite icons, I wouldn't care either. Thanks for giving us your full name. I'm sure you're getting a lot of hate mail. In the next 24 hours your box would be flooded. I

            • Hmm..

              That's not the guy who took her to the event. So you're mad that someone who is married to a picture of a celebrity that he likes?

    • Joe

      Pretty sure if you put up a youtube video you can get a date with him next year for the ball.

    • cathleen

      i was at that ball! she was such a sweetheart!

    • ajw

      all these comments and they are all about the marine, not mila kunis.
      get yourselves together !

      • SanDiego

        i was at this exact ball and she was all up on me and i was all like damn

  • Jamie

    #12 Amazing! it's like something Dr. Suess would be proud of.

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=17815425 Adam Purcell

      Agreed, awesome, but saying it makes music might be a bit of a stretch, it's more like having a cool waterfall on the side of your house.. .http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JQZgq_lrwQ4&feature=related

      • jesse

        neighbours must be mad.

        • MattKL


    • Guz

      Space to build in Dresden though, cos we bombed the shit out of it in the war!

    • Craigery

      Yeah, but it doesn't play music. That's not how horns work.

  • http://twitter.com/panamex512 @panamex512

    #13 like a boss

    • Alf

      She looks amazin there, as per.

    • RippTydde

      Did anyone notice the wedding ring on the Marine's finger!?!? LOL!!!

      • James

        Yeah, but what the fuck is that on his forehead?

        • Really?

          Looks like lipstick in the shape of a kiss.

        • occupy_fail

          Maybe he got hurt? Have you ever seen burns or scars before? And yah, a wedding ring..wow so he's not allowed to take a photo with someone he admires?

    • JuanCa

      What I'm surprised about is that he is supposed to be a bad ass marine, and he is drinking Michelob Ultra???? WTF

      • Adam_R

        You, sir, have never had to run a PFT the day after a Marine Corps Ball, have you….

        • just a lil sarcasm

          Or a CFT, or a hike, or even a swim qual… either way you have got to love morning PT… oo-rah!

          • Adam_R

            Ugh…no joke. Post Marine Corps Ball piss test and a 15+ mile hike in full gear = regret for drinking heavy beers.

            • just a lil sarcasm

              or a 7 mile run plus piranha pit in boots n uts with flak while the major decides to join in…

      • occupy_fail

        Good stuff…maybe he's a diabetic? I

    • Aquanox12

      He who said 'like a boss' took the words right out of my mouth. This story is actually pretty impressive too

  • BigHate

    #17 ahh photoshop.

    • Obvi

      The chive d-bags think no one is paying attention.

    • Maytrix

      Um… photoshop or just that someone can't spell?

      • jbear

        The original said "STRIPER AHEAD."

    • jbear

      Seriously. I actually raged a little at the original because you inherently have to be an uneducated fuck to think it's remotely funny. Don't try to fix it, just let it die.

  • dr feel good

    this was pretty awe

  • betterinsound

    #11 "Right see, I want the juice see. No drink, no coppers, no one gets hurt dollface. Nyahhh."

  • g3nXsLack3r

    #13 I applaud Mila for keeping her word. I'm sure most people think "he must be really honored she agreed to do that"…but really, the honor is all Mila's. We owe those men and women a debt that can never be repaid.

    • Catence

      Kudos to Mila but is anyone else curious about the marine's wedding band?

      • MattKL

        That just means he was lucky enough to marry a girl who's cool enough to let him do this.

        • tickthetock

          OR that he decided it was worth ending his marriage to go on a date with Mila Kunis

          • lonin

            Or that isn't the Marine that asked her to go. He just got a picture taken with a celebrity. Most Wives wouldn't mind, in fact, she probably took the picture.

            I'm just surprised that it didn't seem to be as big a deal about Mila going as with Justin.

            • occupy_fail

              The man in that photo is not sgt. moore who took mila …

    • theyhateme

      we owe tehem nothing NOTHING

      • Fapmaster

        You suck

      • truth

        You are right. We don't OWE anyone anything. We have a volunteer military so those that chose to serve did so by their own desire. However just like they chose to serve as our first line of protection from threats foreign and domestic, they are entitled to some respect and recognition that they chose the more difficult path in our society. If you truly felt you owed them nothing, you wouldn't have commented. I, for one, offer thanks.

      • cathleen

        your a jerk

    • alki

      I applaud the lack of hover hands, the marine's obvious cast-iron balls for 1. being a marine, and 2. asking a smoking hot celebrity to a ball and not being intimidated or 'star-struck' by her.

      And respect to Mila for keeping her word.

    • Jen

      if any hot Marines wanna get it on…

  • MrKennedy

    #5 Sarah Silverman in college…AND ON THE TOILET…Still hot…

    • JOHN

      People really think she's hot? No fucking thanks

      • http://www.youtube.com/user/ADHDavenger13?feature=mhsn Firefighter23

        I do.

      • poop

        And still hot………, or and still not hot at all but you'd bang her on the toilet while her friend pee'd in the sink

      • The_Dood

        She apparently was in college, but I agree with you. I wouldn't do her now unless I was pretty hammered.

      • Admiral Ackbar

        Agree. Not hot at all

    • loso

      Saraah Silverman and still not funny

    • Ken

      Sarah Silverman….not hot or funny. Total waste of space.

    • Hmmm

      We had classes together in High School and she wasn't hot or funny then either. The best word that described her was needy.

      • hMMMM

        dude, really? What's with the name.

    • ImpressMe

      Not hot…never was funny.

    • kingblc

      Never hot, Never funny.

      • Dan

        i bet you her money looks attractive – that being said ill take my chances with Oprah

    • truth

      I don't think she is hot. I don't think I could get past her annoying voice or her over-the-top attempt to be funny. Some may find her cute, but no thanks.

    • Scott

      Agree with mostly everyone, that chick was NEVER hot and NEVER funny, just a skanky ho.

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=516541859 Michael McCollough

      I'd rather hammer nails into my penis.

    • Jimmy the Hat

      It look like Sarah's friend needs to eat more Fiber by the look on her face!

    • Christian Lander

      Stuff White People Like # 52 Sarah Silverman

      White people love to laugh, so it’s no surprise that some of the funniest people in the world are white! But do not believe that white people find all types of humor funny. BET Comicview for example is not considered funny, and white people generally get little to no enjoyment out of the program.

      The easiest way to find out if a comedian is approved by white people is to see if they get mentioned on music blogs or have ever given an interview where they talk about how much they love The Magnetic Fields, Of Montreal, or The Shins. But this does not guarantee white acceptance.

      If the topic of comedy comes up, the best thing to do is talk about how much you love Sarah Silverman. White people can’t get enough of her!

      Her whole shtick is about saying really offensive things! But it’s ok because she’s pretty and has a small voice so it all sounds so cute! Get it? It’s not offensive, because when she says racist or sexist things she knows they are offensive. So it’s ok.

      Much as white women will say that John Stewart is their perfect man, it is fully acceptable and encouraged for white men to say that Sarah Silverman is their perfect woman.

      Sarah Silverman is also considered an “alternative comic” which essentially means she is universally loved by white people, but not enough so that she can be a movie star.

      Other acceptable ‘alternative’ comedians: David Cross, and the Comedians of Comedy (Patton Oswalt, Brian Posehn, and Zach Galifinakis).

      Also acceptable: Any comedian who shares your ethnicity.

      WARNING: under no circumstances should you EVER list Dane Cook as your favorite comedian. The wrong kind of white people like him. And mentioning him will cause white people to lose all respect for you.

      • can't read

        thumbs down for righting a book…

      • truth

        You sure threw around a lot of false assumptions and bad generalizations.

  • theyellowfever

    #12 Cool but I'd never want to live there. Rain sleep is too good.

  • theMess1ah10

    #13 good work sir. She better have felt honored to go to that ball.

    • bigcat72

      Just another reason Mila Kunis is AWESOME!

    • http://www.tube8.com Troll_the_World

      Gave her a ball …

      .. bitches love balls?

  • https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1064188593 Josh Gorter

    #14 Number of fucks given? zero

  • Him

    #11 "They made fun of my fedora…I made fun of their pain."

    • 6655321

      What fedora? Looks like a flat cap.

    • Smails

      google fedora, please.

      • Him

        lmao fuck me.. should have in the first place…don't know what i was thinking.

    • tLoko420

      its a paperboy

  • Mossy

    # 13

    Every single man or woman who fights for us deserves to have their pick of anyone for one night.

    Thank you for your service brother, you deserved her

    • 6655321

      I call Emma Watson than. Yes!

      • myself

        Don't know if it works from country to country, but good call nonetheless.

      • MattKL

        I call Gabrielle Union then. Yesss

    • Mister


      thats how a pic is posted

    • GG Allen

      fuck those jar-head faggots.

  • http://www.facebook.com/bmignaco Bruno Mignaco

    524am here.. wow the chive gets the job done early!
    thanks chive!

  • http://www.markmushakian.com Mark

    Haha, I keep scrolling up to see #1 , and I laugh every time 🙂

    • hMMMM

      Jack Russells are the shit! I have a Jack and Schnauzer mix and he kicks ass!

    • Paul

      Dog drowned in next picture because of no vest in #1

  • https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1064188593 Josh Gorter

    #5 What kind of pervert busting in a bathroom with two chicks pissing and says " hey this is a pretty good photo-op"?

    • mickdeck

      The best kind

      • Anon

        I'm just surprised Sarah is the one on the toilet.

    • Craigery

      You're joking, right? It's pretty obvious they were posing for the picture. Do you even know who Sarah Silverman is?

    • theyhateme


      • hMMMM

        me. i like quirky jewish girls.

        • greg the bunny

          absolutely me too

  • Robozombiejesus

    #10 Fucking stop that shit.

  • James L.

    #5 anyone notice that they are pissing?

    • Spt

      in the sink

    • just sayin..

      think the one on the left is poopin…

    • MonkeyMadness

      No! Really?????? How observant of you!

  • Nanook

    #13 No hover hand for this Marine. HOORAH!

    • Rudy

      was just going 2 say…thank God he actually put his arm around her like a man! (PS if you're hating on this guy you're a total fkn douche.)

    • Adam_R

      I believe the term you're looking for is, "Oorah!"…there's no H in the front.

    • trooperjoe

      He could have grabbed a man's beer.

      • JT Mo-Nay

        THANK YOU. My wife and my mother in law drink Ultra. That stuff is just pisswater. Grab a lager or a guinness like a real man marine.

        • SanDiego

          no. grab a stone arrogant bastard u puss

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