Daily Afternoon Randomness (49 Photos)

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  • fml

    #30, #31

    Add frumpy pajamas, 30 lbs, and a bad attitude and that looks exactly like my wife wrapping gifts.

    • Guse

      My wife does one better (worse) and wears footies. It's impossible to be attracted to someone dressed like a 7 year old.

      • Bud Lee

        I withhold the pedobear joke that is in my head…

      • PedoBear

        I disagree

        • A Pedophile

          me too.

      • sadman

        "It keeps my feet warm." I complained and so she wore lingerie underneath that she could unzip to… still not sexy.

      • its_forge

        Clearly you've never met any of the women I've dated. Or been married to.

    • DerJöe

      lol

    • Dennis

      LMAO!

    • mikey

      I call bullshit on the second set of photos…why is she taking the photo?

      • Unfkngblvbl

        I call bullshit too, why did she change her clothes? Also, somebody who's called a "wife" doesn't do that anymore.

        • japseye

          wife's dont wear shit.

        • SimonPhoenix

          She's not taking the photo .. she is holding up the chive ..HOWEVER, you point about her changing her clothes is a valid observation sir.

          • Albert 5th musketeer

            I'm going to guess that she changed into a pushup bra so her tits look better. Either way I don't really care about her sartorial choices.

            • http://twitter.com/gamer_james @gamer_james

              best use of the term sartorial since barney stinson

              • respect

                its SIR barney Stinson…

            • its_forge

              I'll buy that.

        • Hand of Fate

          I don't know man, my wife walked into the living room in lingerie to wrap presents and convince me to help her decorate the tree. It was very effective motivation.

          You just gotta find the right girl, lol.

          • Mikey

            Shut up! Just shut up Mr. "I have the perfect life!"

        • its_forge

          Hah, says you.

    • justin

      shes wrapping presents like that
      and so generous
      congrats, i hope one day to find what you have

      • japseye

        aids?

    • Joe

      very sad, but true ….

    • Hand of Fate

      Good for you, husband of #30 #31.

      As a guy who has had my wife on here too, I can appreciate your sharing (and appreciate your wife too…)

      Chive on man & wife!

    • Happy Husband in Mi

      haha so everyone knows 30 and 31 is my wife. i took the pic earlier this month. the pic of her wrapping was her wrapping. she finally gave me the ok to send it in so i sent both… THanks Chive love the Story… my wife and I are probably gonna send in some more this week.

      • DoomsDayDub

        Shes fucking the neighbor. Sorry, with a wife that banging, I had to throw some hate on your parade.

        Seriously, we need to see the face now though, she looks like she is really hot from the half of her face I can see….Or at least a "gap" shot.

    • http://twitter.com/superstistics @superstistics

      I dont give a fuck if the whole thing was staged……….. I'd hit that chicken eye.

  • etcrr

    #2 #33 now that's what I'm Talking about

    • gracias

      #33 is that a dildo at the night stand?

      • rabble

        At first I was like "hhmmm, why is she on the DAR?" Then, I was like "DILDO!"

        • Red Anvil

          Nope. It's lube… and damn good lube at that.

          • Teutonicebonic

            Able to pick out lube at 200 yards…

      • Guzzini

        MOAR please….

      • Rolo tomasi

        Somebody had a real good time, because it also looks like the mattress has fallen through the bed frame to the floor too.

    • Mrs_Conejo

      #2, cute girl, but the "Oh, I JUST woke up and took this pic," is getting played out…

      • Nope

        Actually, no! No it's not.

        • lame

          yes. it is. just admit you want attention, and take the damn picture. hold the bullshit.

          • Hobo with a shotgun

            she is a fucking sea pig. wide flat face, wide flabby hips, this pig needs to be turned into bacon. that's the only way im eating it.

            • DaddyD

              While you are waiting, I'm enjoying the meal.

            • its_forge

              Hey be sure to post and let us know when you actually get within 100 yards of touching a boob okay?

    • PEDRO TMANG

      YUMMMM OMG WHITE BOOS ALL THA WAY LAP LAP

  • jason

    #45

    Any guesses?

    • SpacemanSpiff

      a balloon?

    • Phil

      Pretty sure it's called lighting

    • tony

      dat dere is prolly one of dem spaceships

      • japseye

        yeah tony pobly iz

    • Jules-CO

      A Jet stream…and the sun.

      • Al W

        This

    • Jason

      Most likely a rocket launched from Vandenberg AFB. Happens all the time.

      • Active_hunter

        The best shows are early morning… Could see them from time to time from AZ.

    • Tajo Juan Kennedy

      Sun penis.

    • justin

      jason bright from fallout new vegas

      • mycroft

        LMAO. Well played!

    • Tyler

      Looks like a rocket contrail

    • bossman

      contrail

      • Cruzer117

        chemtrail*

        • fgg

          cumtrail*

    • Captlazarus

      Sun Shart

    • Jay Costanza

      CHEMTRAILS……. OMG ILLUMINATI WTF.

    • koyf

      team rocket blasting off again

      • ShakeyTheMoyle

        I guess that's better than team Edward….ickey:|

    • Richard

      Malcolm Mcdowell is clearly trying to destroy a star again to reach the Nexus.

      • shitfaced

        Well played.

    • bob

      it's model rocket geniuses

    • Probably black

      incoming MOAB!

    • BAH-ZING

      Another Broncos win!

    • sjon
    • Chicago Chiver

      Looks like the earth is impregnating the sun.

    • Bpierson85

      A foiled plot to destroy the world…

      fucking Batman.

    • hi

      chuck norris throwing a football

    • OneEndedStick

      From CLOVERFIELD
      It's either that or it's Team Rocket blasting off again!!!!

    • FBI

      Original poster is in our custody, nothing to see here

    • lol

      THOR

    • Extroidn8

      ball lightning

    • https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=722809282 Oliver Vorian Wang

      Mr. Robert House's defence rockets shooting down nukes headed for Las Vegas.

      Oh yes, nuclear war happened.

      just kidding.

    • Rooster

      that is a ballistic missile being launched from white sands missile range in new mexico, just a test but still bad ass.

    • Drew

      Probably a a jet doing a vertical takeoff from Nellis AFB. It's right in Vegas.

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100003066556639 Nick Holwegner

      It's a weather balloon refracting the light of Venus off of some swamp gas.

  • blaster

    fist!

    • Tomas

      Thumb!

    • https://www.facebook.com/pctechjunkie429 Kyle White

      You should receive one to the face.

    • eh.

      yourself!

  • BLT

    How is it possible you already read through the whole thing…

  • xXbeermonkeyXx

    #12 i dont want to live in this planet anymore

    • justsaying

      Just saw it this weekend. It was worth it. The movie sucked. Lets just say the girlfriend was very appreciative.

      • Smuggler

        No matter what your girlfriend did for you after, it's probably something she's done before. Twilight is never worth it. I would have stayed at home and yerked it while she went to the movie.

      • iaya97

        Not condoning justsaying's behavior, but…

      • Chris

        Your girlfriend is either 11 or a moron. Either way, anything she did to you was probably clumsy and unsatisfying.

    • CockMuncher

      Bye

    • bossman

      Come up to the surface then!

    • Dumb bastards

      No one is stopping you from leaving

    • Albert

      Im having a hard time believing that much stupid shit is in one movie

  • Whatever

    #3 Paula?

    • err

      The best part is that dude's face in the background

      • Brutal Deluxe

        If they notice him, he'll be eaten. Run, dude!

  • 80's Baby

    #33… is that Astro Glide I see????

    • Mike Scrotal

      I hope so…then I'd hit it sideways! "It" being her vagina.

    • Captlazarus

      Or hand sanitizer. she be giving a vicious raw dick skinnin

      • Paul Wells

        I think its a dildo in front of the pic

        • japseye

          i think your mistaking that for a drink

          • Brutal Deluxe

            I think there's no background

    • marco

      i think i love her even more. just another for good measure. #33 damn!

  • http://twitter.com/Csquaredapparel @Csquaredapparel

    #2 Well good afternoon! MORE PLEASEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • Spencer_on_Fire

      Wouldn't mind waking up to her every morning

      • Sicky Steve

        You spelt "wanking" wrong

  • Jessica

    #41

    Erin Willett's eyes are stunning imho

    • Jason

      Congratulations to her!

    • Spencer_on_Fire

      She's a gorgeous woman, that's for sure

    • marco

      i concur. and congrats Erin.

  • http://www.facebook.com/ALEXANDERMURCIA9 Alexander Murcia

    #31 true dat

    • pat

      dude your wife is hot as fuuuuck

    • BloodScrubber

      Best.Wife.Ever.

  • Itsa me

    #38 I'll give that bitch a kiss…bitches love kisses

    • TomTom

      Give her a cheeseburger.

      • Brian

        A lot of 'em.

    • KimKim

      You wanna kiss the dog?

  • slim

    #22 find her!

    • Whoopi_G

      +1 agreed.

    • Dennis

      ….and the cat too.

    • justin

      that woman is just…. dam
      gotta unveil her

    • pyrostevenson

      yes please find her

    • mtpuckhead

      It took me a bit to get past this one.

    • jack_skeleton11

      agreed!

      • the other OTHER Jen

        she's at home doing yoga with her cat, duh!

  • ronnie clayton

    farts, farts, farts

    • mash master

      ha ha. you thought you were going to be first to comment but couldn't think of anything clever to say about any of the photos so you just quickly typed any old thing while the number of comments was still low.
      nice try but you came in 12th.

  • dbolusaf

    #16 ….ARG fuckin taco bells chicken flatbread….it looked so awesome in commercials when i got it i was pissed

    • HatBomb

      Yeah, that was serious letdown. Taco bell commercials get you all pumped, and so rarely are their NEW AWESOME ITEMS really all that awesome. Awesome taco bell is not always awesome.

    • hmm

      It might be better after you've been partying all night long.

    • Umbra Fractus

      Your first mistake was expecting anything worthwhile from Taco Bell.

    • slag

      Same as the triple steak flatbread thing. What a mess of salty fuckin gooo!

    • sadman

      Hot chocolate is made from chocolate, sugar and milk; not cocoa powder. Second, Taco bell should be used as a laxative. That being said, here is a video of a hippo farting:

  • http://twitter.com/BrandonScottB @BrandonScottB

    #33

    Looks like a bottle of lube on the nightstand. Somebody had some fun.

    • http://dbdesignco.com bisketz

      there's something in the picture besides a short skirt and great legs?

    • Smitty

      Indeed. Kinky, Kinky fun.

  • Whoopi_G

    I like women because boobs.

  • Guse

    #46 made me giggle.

    • this is me

      My guess is its some kind of Pokemon.

      • Falthor

        I love the video of it where the guy is screaming "Trampoline… Trampoline"

    • stewie

      Fucking awesome! This is from "Hurricane Bawbag" we had in Scotland!

      • japseye

        really fukin awesome dude, my entire family dead from falling telegraph pole took the minivan out, they'd just returned from pizza hut, didnt even have time to get of the van. rip

        • ShakeyTheMoyle

          Made me giggle 🙂

        • Brutal Deluxe

          Welcome to the internet, where sympathy is a myth. Although if your mom was hot, then I'm sad.

  • Benninj

    At least coming home to a good day of posts on the chive makes up for the IT assholes at work inadvertently blocking it on me on my first day back from my vacation.

    • japseye

      who's reading this, and wot the fuvk does it mean ??? derp

    • Max L

      Calm down Charlie.This comment was OK

    • DMAC

      It's only the IT assholes that 1) keep you in your job 2) keep the company running and 3) are the smartest people in the room as they need to know how everyone does their job to all of the applications running. Trust me, I know this from experience

      • bryan

        Well Said sir

  • Anonymous

    Not first

  • JDB

    #49 Perfect finish.

  • BARTMAN

    #49 nice

  • Skedaddle

    #15 tag me. Please.

  • Erwin

    Woke up early to nab 'Keep Calm' today in Australia. Didn't get my dates right. fuck.

    • Ander

      but congratulations on getting up early. Apparently the rest of your countrymen and women can't stay up or get up early to get stuff.

  • http://www.allinbayarea.com TWON925

    #23 Once you enter there is no escaping it

    • bisonbade

      bitch got owned

    • teh dude

      took me about 6 years to get out once…

    • JOHN

      Option A: grope breast and see if she's down.
      Option B: grand romantic gesture (which will not work)
      Option C: fuck her best girlfriend on 1st friends bed and finish on section of bedding that is not frequently seen. homie don't play the friend-zone.

      • Smitty

        Damn dude. I like your style.

        • Dunny

          Actually, you just like JOHN.

          • the other OTHER Jen

            chloroform, boys.

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