Daily Morning Awesomeness (25 Photos)

  • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

    Oh yeah! Of course I am… Whatcha gonna do about it, Willis?
    #3 Are they feeding him their honey-covered pet?

    – suck it up, just suck it up… not much else you can do

    • Cletus

      I want have fuck explosion in the hole of your butt.

      • Stop

        Stop Replying to Paula

    • Cyberfunker

      You really need some friends, Paula. Try AA meetings or something like that, you know like the crazy bitch in Fight Club.

      • wisemx

        Paula that guy above is funky, move along and keep kickin it.

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        I got kicked out of the last AA meeting I attended; for eating during the session. Such a shame as I hadn't barbecued for months before that!
        Also, what is a barbecue without beer!?? They did not approve though, naggers.

        – still not getting humans

        • LarsfromNorway

          I hope you get molested by Gary Busey

    • kenny

      you big fat fucker

  • Juan

    #4 I NEED THIS!

    • MattKL

      So who ya gonna call?

      • The Bandit

        HE-Man, HE-Man, HE-Man!!!

        • 6655321

          My dad says you're full of crap.

        • The Bandit

          Looks like my in-joke from the beginning of the second movie wasn't well received…well, maybe it's too long ago….

      • myself

        The Keymaster?

        • Asshole Aplenty


    • Kodos

      "On a mountain of skulls, in a castle of pain, I sat upon a throne of blood…"

    • Bobby Light

      No, you need to get laid.

    • TheAutomaticMan


    • Steve

      fuck that – If Vigo was hanging in my apt I would never sleep out of pure fear.

    • Vigo

      And you can have it!
      He got it from here. http://www.zazzle.com/vigo_the_carpathian_poster-
      Customizable in case you don't want to break the bank.

  • 0010101


  • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

    #15 insert 'balls in her face' comments below this line:

    – just suck it up meow

    • myself

      More balls to the back (maybe side) of the head.

      Damn Paula, you seem to be phoning it in today.

    • I_Hate_Paula

      you try too hard

      • Understanding

        as do you sir^ you obviously dont know the only way to get rid of something that thrives off of attention is to pay no attention to it at all. Soon that which you have so much hatred/jealousy for will soon disappear for want of attention.

        • wisemx

          Yeah…kiss your hands and toss them in the air, Paula is fresh.

    • Brandin

      As hard as it might be, I think everyone should 'Like' Paula's posts. I think it would kill her to hit Green on her status.

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        That's right, I fear the day I go green…. I might even melt!

        – fan testimonial: "Yeah…kiss your hands and toss them in the air, Paula is fresh."

  • Still_Counts


    Yep and I just poop in my hand then place it in the toilet so it doesn't make a noise.

    • The_Dood

      With Powerthirst you'll win at everything forever! You'll win at running! Football! Arson! Weddings! And art!

      • Sadman

        Best flavor is probably Gun, but Fizzbitch is a close second.

  • Codey

    #7 looks like james franco

    • SheriffPablo

      Jesus? Is that you?

      • Simon

        If Jesus and Aragorn had a baby……

    • Blumpkin

      I think is one of the former Knights Who Say Ni!

    • Brad

      I'm going to go more with Johnny Depp on this one…

    • Burlinator

      Me thinks he took his name from David Lee Roth's lyrics for "Just a Gigolo"…

      • _Moose_

        Great call! boz dee boz dee bop ditty bop

    • Eric

      Nice to see another Chiver from ND in here

    • RobTalk

      young Gary Oldman

  • Heather



    • MonkeyMadness

      Because Fuck you! That's why.

    • crash0520

      WHY NOT

    • Steve

      "Once my owner painted me like a tiger. Once!"

    • Underbaker

      Because it is the most awesome dog costume ever!!!

  • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

    Insert remarks about wanting #2's wife below this line:

    – suck it up, really, you'll get used to it

    • fuzzleg

      I'd be happy if she was my Mum….

      • YourMom

        I can help

    • http://thechive.com cubicman

      Thanks Paula_ ,You're the only one reason why I'm still using TheChive.

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        Awwwww…. Thats schweet… You reading this John? 🙂

        Big hug,
        – keeping people from moving to Reddit

    • I_Hate_Paula

      you try too hard

    • marcochan

      All this guys wife is doing is trying to keep his germs contained so she doesn't get sick…

      • TheAutomaticMan

        or he beats her…… one or the other….

        • Csquaredapparel

          doesn't matter

    • SARmedic

      Yeah, but is she making you a sandwich now?

    • Underbaker

      So your wife reads The Berry. (hey work gets a little boring sometimes and it don't hurt to study what the ladies are thinking)

  • 2TwoDeux

    OMG give me your wife, … how did you train her to do things like that???

    • JP Souza

      When you realize that they are not 'things' to be 'trained', you may one day have a wife like his.

      • Maveric

        When you realize not all wives are this cool, you'll be crushes…

      • Girly


    • Dylan

      And you get to play Skyrim? Nice.

  • Rollout25

    #25 That cat must get all the cats

    • joe


    • Why is it shiny?

      He gets all the pussy

  • eman

    what a shitty DMA

    • Bobby Light

      agree. It was unusually weak today.

    • Marcus

      So's your face.

  • FloppyRocks

    #1 "Hold on, let me just finishing mowing my pond."

    • Brewcrew

      Like a boss!

  • dashete

    #7 Howard Moon's been possessed by the Spirit of Jazz

  • Mmm_Ciao

    #13 I always get a little paranoid driving behind trucks that have cars loaded on the back.
    #22 Fucking cats.

    • Anaughtybear

      That many Bongo trucks makes me nostalgic for the old days in Osan, ROK.

  • cocktard

    #4 The scourge of Carpathia, the sorrow of Moldavia!!!!!!!

    • Bobby Light

      Get a life, dork.

    • Chum

      Vigo, you've been a bad monkey!

    • Vigo
    • Derbymon

      Gowd! That's sad. What the hell is this?!
      A big poster.
      Go out and shoot some hoops. Do something.

    • Master_Rahl

      You are like the buzzing of flies to him

  • MattKL

    Fucking bots.

    • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

      Do! Not! Reply! To! Spammers!
      Your reply is keeping it visible after deletion!

      Kick in the butt,

      • MonkeyMadness

        I believe the admins have this one.

  • The Bandit

    #2 …that looks cozy….just have enough snacks and drinks ready, so you won't have to get up all day.
    #24…just the right size to get yourself through a normal working day.

  • Mike

    I just got home from a concert (steel panther….fuck ya!) and trying to recover. went to the chive and say DMA was up. said out loud "it aint the fucking morning yet!"…..it was 12:13. 1'm gonna need this in the morning


    • cr1min4l

      Fuck the goo-goo dolls, they can suck my balls!

    • DrROBOTO

      you got home from a concert at 12:13? Reading that made me sad for you

      • bill

        sorry some people have jobs

  • MattKL

    #8 So THAT'S what Desmond Miles looks like in real life.

    • spade87

      Nothing is true, everything is permitted.

  • myself

    #2 This just in, she's a keeper.

  • time4taco

    #7 his middle name is doo-doo

    • Bobby Light

      Yes, we can read.

    • Dratera

      #7 aw damn it, I sent one in regarding the same exact guy on earlier this week (cept on our local news channel)! Guess mine wont make DAR/DMR 😦

  • SuperiorTo8

    #10 OK, Chive has posted alot of photos that beg for photoshop. This one… do you really need it?

    • passwordistaco

      It's already been shopped, they added the bread in place of …. oh nevermind

      • NJF

        ….a taco, right?

      • MikeBedlam

        I though they added a little girl in place of a little boy?

        • What???

          Doesn't matter, still had sex

  • http://mensconfidence.com/ TommyB

    #1 looks like Missouri. #22 can do whatever she wants with me.

    • http://mensconfidence.com/ TommyB

      Lol Fail. So much for trying to snag a pic off of a comment.

    • JP Souza

      Sick man. sick

      • http://mensconfidence.com/ TommyB

        lol Scroll up. There's a picture of a hot chick's ass. I thought I was commenting on that. It's on dude's comment.

    • JakeA

      Grafton, IL. I remember this in the newspaper

  • http://mensconfidence.com/ TommyB

    Lol Fail. #23

    • passwordistaco

      Nice recovery Tommy, 23 fits so much better

    • http://twitter.com/McBeastie666 @McBeastie666

      battin' a thousand there Tommy boy.

  • fr2xedom

    #2 I see why you married her and now have her train your daughters in the ways of the force for future generations to come lol

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