A low down, dirty good time shall ensue (30 Photos)

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  • etcrr

    #10 made me laugh

    • Pants

      You'd think some humorless twat would cuss you out by now.

      • mihaisuzuki

        Where's Paula when you need her?

  • LiquidMuff07

    This thread made me laugh

    • Underbaker

      #2 Liked seeing Shawn Michaels doing a head stand, anyone remember why Sid Vicious don't wrestle anymore (watch the video, not for the squeamish)?

  • Havaard

    #30, Anti Drug adds are so fail.

    • RandomDurf

      But sadly so true.

      • Mason420

        I have been high on acid many, many times, but the idea of throwing my own poo never even crossed my mind….so no, not even close to true.

        • Al W

          But now it will

          • Havaard

            No… It wont…

            • acido

              there's only one way to find out… acid, let's do some!

              • brandy

                the drawing looks like Megan Fox

    • biggles

      Acid is the best high money can buy. Ain't expensive, and it's not addictive.

      • 1up

        i like shrooms… mmmh shrooms

        • IrishYiddo

          That's in my city! 😦

    • nicole

      its not a drugs add, its a anti-littering campaign believe it or not lol

  • etcrr

    #25 is it hump day already? doesn't matter nice butt

    • Dee-Rod

      find her. pretty please.

    • Cross

      I love womens volleyball. =/

  • Mad Hittman

    #7 Stoner achieved…

    • Robert

      …It's clobbering time?

  • http://www.thechive.com Penrath

    #10 Hmm…explains why I have been married three times…. o.0

    • JerkFace

      …Or maybe you're a douche

      • Brittany

        +1

      • http://www.thechive.com Penrath

        Dear Mister/Miss J. Face,
        I am afraid you are suffering from a substantial misconception.
        Fortunately, I don't:
        1. Make a duck face,
        2. Carry around a bottle of Grey Goose,
        3. Wear a baseball cap (with the stickers still attached) with the brim awkwardly askew,
        4. Wear excessive, cheap, gaudy Jewelry,
        5. Flash wannabe pretend gang signs,
        6. Wear excessive amounts of hair product,
        7. Wear two polo shirts at the same time with both collars popped,
        9. Have a star, tribal, Asian symbol or barbwire tattoo,
        10. Wear my sunglasses indoors or while at night.

        If you need visual examples of a Douche (AKA: "Scrote") please follow this link to view examples: http://thechive.com/category/funny_hilarious_phot

        Thank you for contributing to TheChive.

        This has been a public service announcement by NOMADS (Normal Ordinary Men Against Douchebaggery and Scrotes).

  • stevedogg

    first

  • http://www.thechive.com Penrath

    …and Paula still refuses to be my 4th future ex-wife… 😥 😉

    • Fat Bastard

      Be careful what you wish for

  • MattKL

    #25 had me distracted for quite a while, that is an outstanding hump. MOAR.

  • whorehouse

    #22 I see a werewolf, am I the the only one here?

  • BBQ pork

    #22 water-werewolf???

    • Yutty

      I see Jesus on his left leg. And now a water-werewolf too.

      • Kellen

        That shit bricks stuff is over used. People aren't shitting bricks every time they look at an ink blot.

        • http://echogeo.wordpress.com/ echogeo

          Especially a shopped blot.

      • Flip Wilson

        actually, left leg is more of a Jeff Bridges Duderino, but good call.

    • Biggus Diccus

      Kinda looks like a demon to me

    • Pooper

      It's Predator

    • itsashleybro

      It's Insanity Wolf!

    • stephen

      theres also a surprised face at the bottom between the legs of the water were-wolf

    • Jeff

      Micheal J. Fox

    • ShakeyTheMoyle

      He's using a driver to get out of a ruff…duh

      • Jones

        That is a terrible joke

    • YenWen

      Manbearpig…

  • captain obvious

    #30 NOW you tell me!

  • pete

    #5

    i would

    • Travis

      Was it even in question?

    • Dazilla

      wait you had to ask yourself that?

      • pete

        didn't ask. just said it

    • Guest

      As long as she finishes the ironing after.

  • pete

    #23

    doesnt matter, did it doggy style

    hint- doggy

  • SeñorSassypants

    #24 WTF is wrong with Japan???

    • Dr Dreidel

      We dropped an atomic bomb on them

      • fed

        two, actually

    • Flip Wilson

      Hell, thats doing it right if you ask me compared to Housewives of East Whogivesafuck

      • Fat Bastard

        Devil made him do it

  • Wark

    #12 Cyanide & Happiness!

  • oridotan

    #4

    "I don't have a square to spare, I just can't spare a square"

    • Katie

      I saw that on last night too

  • buzz killington

    #5 is a pornstar it's bibi jones

    • HillbillyGOD

      its ok she isnt in the kitchen, please note the iron in the reflection

  • Deadpool

    #8 Good luck getting a normal job…

    • Andy Valentine

      Who the fuck wants a 'normal' job anyway? 'Normal' people living 'normal' predictable lives. Yawn.

      • Get-a-Clue

        Oh I get it you are a 99%er, you are so original and unique. So obviously you do not have to work. Just bitch and complain how you have no money and there are no jobs in america, and stick your hand out for assistance from everyone else that has to live these "normal" lives.

        • Andy Valentine

          Firstly, I don't live in the States, but that's not the point. Outside of that, I'm a professional musician and self-employed guitar teacher. What I earn is no-one's business but my own, but let's just say I'm very comfortable and have never once "stuck my hand out".
          Spent a large part of my life as a 9 to 5 web developer but left that when I got a record deal and there's no chance in hell I'd go back to that life again.

          • Dcolbert

            Andy – good for you and your career that allows you to be "different". If everyone was "different", you wouldn't have any reason to be a sanctimonious and self-absorbed little prick. It is normal people with normal jobs who make your guitars, and your amps, and whatever else gets you through your day. Statistically speaking, more people want a normal job being normal people living normal predictable lives than want your kind of edgy, artistic, alternate lifestyle of "constant intrigue and new experience", anyhow. Next time I'm visiting overseas with my normal family, I'll throw a couple euros in your hat when I pass you as you play shitty music at the mouth of a metro station.

            • Andy Valentine

              If people want "normal predictable lives", then fair play to them. It's not for everyone though and certainly not for me and this is the point that I was attempting to make. That is all.

              • Get-a-Clue

                The other point I was trying to make is that, typically these "different" individuals do not have the talent to make a living doing whatever they want. These people are so delusional in believing that no matter what they decide to pursue they should be rewarded with 6 figure incomes and the best health insurance around. I sometimes wish I could follow my true passions as well, but I am realistic and understand I have other people counting on me to provide for them, so I can not take the risk at this moment in time.

                • Andy Valentine

                  Couldn't agree more. I was only able to do so because I caught a break. My misses has been trying for years to leave dentistry to become a fabric artist but has never been able to justify it, and it's painful to see her try so hard and not get where she wants to be.

                  As you've stated yourself though, you have "true passions" that you wish you could pursue, which I therefore guess isn't what one would consider a 'normal job'. I expect most people have them, hence what I was attempting to convey in my original point before it got massively misconstrued.

                  Now, can't we all just get along 😛

                  • Get-a-Clue

                    Through talk, reasoning, listening and a touch of sarcasm, I believe we can all get along.

                    • Mook

                      Chive Bro-Mance. I'm going to re-read to see if I can find where the spark kicked in.

                  • DoomsDayDub

                    Andy – Your first comment was basically belittling people who have so called normal jobs and normal lives, so that is probably why everyone wanted to take a shit in your throat. You seemed to have changed the tone since then, and I agree people should try to follow their passion, but a lot of people's passions don't equal jobs or money so people have regular jobs. A lot of people just get tired of people like the asshat in this photo who are just obviously trying to do weird shit to themselves to be "different", when in actuality they are just doing the same things millions of other are trying to do, making them no so different after all. Yet, they try to act like people who think it is pointless and idiotic are just boring and don't get it. This guy definitely didn't grow up with a dream to one day let a snake crawl through a hole in his mouth.

                    • Andy Valentine

                      It was in no means intended to belittle anyone, I'm not that way inclined. Was more just attempting to say "who really 'wants' a normal job, and I expect that most people would like to do something a little more unusual quirky", and then things got terribly misconstrued and out of hand.

                    • wascoolin96

                      I was just thinking old, stretched-out, saggy, stinky piercings are kinda gross. I bet mr. snakey-face drools all over the place. poor snake.

                    • Katie

                      I have a normal job and it sucks, I hate it actually and I feel like I'm wasting 40 hours a week of my life every week.

      • Iceman2509

        People who a) want to make money and live a nice life. b) not count on the government for assistance. c) 99% of the population.

        See what I did there?

        Something tells me the ability to have a snake slither through your lip isn't a skill that attracts many jobs.

        • Andy Valentine

          You can achieve a, b and c without having to adhere to what people would consider a 'normal' job though, which is my point.
          It's like when people judge others for having tattoos. They need to stop being so myopic and judge people on their actions, not their looks.

          You're correct though that being able to shove a snake through your face is fucking stupid.

          • Iceman2509

            I have no problems with people get tattoos all over their body. To each their own.
            However as long as they don't bitch when they can't find employment because they look they way the look, I'm happy for them.
            When people get tattoos on they face and neck or do body modification to this point, it basically narrows they career paths. If they can't make it down that path, then they are fucked.
            If they are happy then be my guest. Just don't act surprised when you can't get hired.

            • Andy Valentine

              Agreed. Chances are though, the kind of guys of shoves a reptile through his face isn't the someone that fancies a normal job anyway.

              • DoomsDayDub

                I think the biggest problem is that this kind of dumb ass stuff is always done by young people. So while he may not want a "normal job" right now. A one night stand and child from now he may be thinking differently, but have already screwed himself over. Life is funny and always changing. Some of the most out of control crazy SOBs end up being devoted family men working in accounting and perfectly happy with that. It is mainly, don't do this kind of dumb sh*t because you are limiting your future options.

    • Jack

      You do realise chances are looking like that he works for a body mod place as probably a piercer. Thus he has got a job that pays

    • Not a fan

      mm, I think that is his job.

    • veggin

      work aside, how does he not eat like a toddler??!!

    • NotNormal

      Wait…. Define Normal.

    • Mandrew

      More like good luck getting laid…

  • Seldi84

    #3 #19 #27 #28 are all funny as hell.

    • Arttu

      best in #3 is that actually two last names are guys 😀

  • VileThings

    #8 The fuck?

  • vey oops

    i like turtles #3

    • Greg

      Fuck I hope that is fake

  • Jcop

    #14

    still tastes better than any American Beer.

    • Guest

      False. You need to learn how to find better beer.

    • Nat

      Bull Shit!! I've had this beer. If you can't smell this shit then you will definitely taste how truly shitty it is. (O BTW I work in Maca, China Give me a good ole merican beer.)

    • Andy Valentine

      You guys need to learn the difference between beer and lager.

      I should know, considering I'm from the home of brewing – http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Burton-on-Trent

      • Nat

        Beer Lager it doesn't matter this stuff is shit.

      • Jcop

        You mean 'Ale' and 'Lager'

        Its funny how many but all butt hurt over a little joke. Good to see American pride in their beer.

        Best beer is Ranger IPA/Coronado Islander IPA

      • ShakeyTheMoyle

        You're great Andy…why don't you tell us more about yourself?

    • FACE!

      Tsingtao is shit, want a decent foreign beer try Asahi. But beer is beer wherever you are in the world there are some bad beers and some good beers

  • Benny

    #5 Holy… would you look at that? Someone is behind on the ironing. Such a shame.

    • truth

      she's obviously making up for it.

      • AnthonySyl

        benny is obviously lonely

  • whyme1973

    #5 #25 Nice humps. Praise be to volleyball shorts.

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