Daily Afternoon Randomness (49 Photos)

  • Kaiwatha

    i'd like to be as happy as #2…

    • http://thechive.com/ Paula_
      • Kaiwatha

        makes sense, explains the (trunk) squirting…

    • dedubs

      Who's in charge of that?

      • Jack_LeMac

        The pachyderm god of joy

    • notgullable

      NOT REAL……definitely from The Jungle Cruise at Disneyland Resort

      • JJJJ

        They also have this at Animal Kingdom Disney world just before the Rainforest Cafe.

      • Jeff

        Just saw this yesterday at Disney. Boy those animatronics don't hold up seeing them 15 years later, haha.

    • asdf

      Happiness comes from within

      Excercise and eat right

    • Dr.Thinksalot

      #49 should be first.

    • ChelseaRules

      I'm gonna be seeing that next week! Woo Disneyland!

  • mark may


    I'll be drowning myself in the fountain outside my work if anybody needs me

    • http://www.youtube.com/user/ADHDavenger13?feature=mhsn Firefighter23

      Doesn't work like that. Odds are it'll be some dude that pissed off that you tried to drown in a foot of water.

    • Tomas

      Simultaneously, mouth-to-mouth…. aaaannnnnnnd mouth-to-….. *ahem* πŸ˜‰

    • SATexas4life

      Now I just need to find this lake and I'll be "drowning" fairly often.

    • joshua

      Mark May is an idiot. I hope your not the one that argues with Lou Holtz all the time. Because if you are, your an idiot….

    • Underbaker

      Find it!!! The beach that is, I need to plan my summer vacation and this one has great possibilities.

  • MC2

    #3 you make a nice curtain

    • thegoogguy

      Nicci Pisari
      Tineye + Google = fapping done right!

      • JHL1

        actually, all you need is google

    • regcrim

      Nicci Pisarri. You're welcome.

    • OnehandJack

      Got dayum

    • meuasso

      2008 Maxim Hometown Hotties Finalist: Nicole Pisarri
      Breathtaking πŸ™‚

    • Underbaker

      That body is absolute perfection. If you want a dictionary pic of what I mean by soft and curvy, there you have it.

    • Heidi

      She is perfect. πŸ™‚

  • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

    I made it to yesterday's "People you wouldn’t miss if the world ended today" list! I'm famousies!
    Who do ya love meow?

    – Fan testimonial: "Another thing is you sound a LOT like a Chive staff member – especially when you said, "Slow days at the Chive? When was that? Apparently you work very closely with the Chive staff to know how busy or not it can get."

    • PDiddily420

      No you are infamous and a legend in your own mind

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        Bill57! I missed you!

        – Fan testimonial: "Just when you seemed that you possibly might have a heart, and were capable of acting like a human being paula, you go a fuck it up….the 2 of you grinches should be ashamed of yourselves…"

    • BigRick69

      I figured I'd hijack Paula's awful post to say a few things about #13
      This argument makes absolutely no sense. The Mayans had a completely separate calendar system, one that is actually more accurate then the current Gregorian calendar (Google some info about the Mayan calendar, it is pretty interesting). They never borrowed ancient european calendars and then vanished before their chance to update them when Caesar introduced the leap year. The "doomsday" date of December 21st 2012 had to be translated from the Mayan system, taking all differences into account.

      • http://www.thechive.com AdamBaldick

        I dont understand.. Whatever college man

        • BigRick69


          Sorry I am a poor writer when it comes to explanations.There you are.

          • ShowerWithSandusky


            • BigRick69

              I'm sorry that I made some of you uncomfortable by posting a comment that required them to read for 15 seconds. Please disregard my giving a shit and continue to browse the internet without giving a shit.

              • Westy

                Please continue to give shits, I almost thought all this prepping was for nothing. πŸ™‚

      • Underbaker

        I'm with ya Big Rick. Saw that flaw in their logic to. If leap years came before Mayans then it would make sense, but since the Mayans came first it is total horse hockey, because we compared our Leap Year calendar to their existing one to come up with the current date.

    • Slingshot Engage

      meow. Super Troopers?

  • MyBu

    #11 jordan carver……. drool…….

    • Master_Rahl

      awesome spin on the Tenacious D cock push-ups. Boob push-ups. Boing!

    • chronicLSD

      bewbs must be why girls arent very good at pushups
      never realized til now

  • skwee

    #49 – Holy Balony slices Batman!!

    • Whiskyb

      yup, yup, yup. Count me in

    • JOHN

      Where's that Self respect meme?

      • JOHN

        Chive still won't post any photos of my testicle cleavage. Lets see what they think on theBerry

    • Pedro

      There is something wrong with her neck muscles

      • Elbie

        I guess I could fix her.

      • sadman

        Taco neck syndrome from the early 90's. Damn you Taco Bell!

    • Weiners and Gonads

      *Bologna its in the song

      • skwee

        I knew that was coming πŸ˜€ I tried to spell it foneticaly correct for people not from Italy or familiar with the old commercial song.

        Here, let me save you the trouble *phonetically…. Oh man I crack myself up….

    • hot

      Those are awesome. Seriously

    • Geoff

      i wonder if she knows its easy to photo shop that to actually show her nipples clearly. meh either way, nice.

      • ohbill

        so do it….

    • steve

      Totally want to motorboat these

    • Thumbs Up

      There are not enough 'thumbs up' in the world for these….ever.

    • GlibTongue

      Noone likes a Bieber fan, regardless of how big her boobs are.

      I'm starting to wonder if she has current lower back problems though. With her head tilted to the side the same way in each photo.

      • JHL1

        My how glib of you.

    • captinBADtouch

      #49 Moar please!!!!

    • Anymouse

      It almost makes up for the Bieber poster on her wall.

      • Thatmouse

        You know how I know you're gay?…

    • Underbaker

      (drool…) try to think of witty comment… (can't stop staring) oh to hell with it, just keep staring. (drool…)

  • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

    #49 please put on a vest OK?

    – or a paper bag on your head

    • PDiddily420

      Paula put a plastic bag over your head tie it off and jump into the east river

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        How kind…. you want me to float…

        – Fan testimonial: "You are a comedic genius Paula. It's really just that simple. :)"

    • Pearl Rabbit


      I want to have sex with you so you calm the F**K down.

    • Come On Paula...

      Paula…..no one likes a hater…I'm sure you are SO much better then that Darlin… πŸ˜‰

    • Tangles_112

      Not exactly a chiver attitude. Also, if you're the ying to the chive yang, therefore not making you a chiver… gtfo…


    • chivette

      dear paula,

      youre a hater. fuck yourself. sorry im prettier than you.

      the chivette in this picture. ❀

      • dumbofounded


      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        Awwww…. Why do people always misunderstand me…?
        I love boobies! But do put on a vest dear. Yours are wet and I wouldn't want them to catch a cold, boobies don't deserve that! Also nobody likes sneezing boobies.

        – really, boobies rock!

    • http://matter.com Fkn Nick, Duh

      She's obviously just trolling. It's what ugly girls do.

    • paula is jealous

      jealous much?

  • Fella

    #26 – that's how you do CPR

    • Dirty_Dingus

      #25 You had me at NES

    • HUH?

      if the first one has her mouth on his mouth, where is the 2nd one's mouth? they didnt teach that in my cpr class.

      • Underbaker

        The second one is giving him the reason to live.

  • mcgizzle

    #24 I now really like polka dots too

    • Wet_tosti

      I like to poke her dots!

    • Attaxia

      Oh hell yes !

      • Kyle

        I hate polka dots. She should take it off

    • MattKL

      Those polka dots would look a lot better bunched up on the floor.

    • joe testarosa

      that's what happens when they leave the kitchen. Spelling errors.

    • Ummmmm

      Girl can't spell, but who cares, right?

    • slim jim

      I've always loved polka dots.

    • SquishyFlint

      I…wait, what were we talking about, again? I got distracted…

    • asdf

      Give those enormous panties back to your grandma!

      Thong or commando will work out well for you.

      Unless…aunt Flo is visiting this week!

    • Gallus

      I don't know about polka dots, but I sure as *hell* like the girl. I want more!

  • soon


    I don't mean to sound demanding, Chive. But there's more of her somewhere and I expect it tomorrow

    Thank you

  • Whoopi_G

    #49 Holy shit. Please keep sending in photos of yourself.

    • mitter78

      Agreed…she is fucking gorgeous.

  • SPD

    #49 the new official St. Patty's day wear

    • Gallus

      " ..the new official St. Patty's day wear. "

      Oh, Lord, I hope so!!!

  • Jack_LeMac

    #1 "Recess won't be ending today, Mr. Principal."

  • helllllno

    #45 I lose

    • reaperMEDIC

      No one loses in this competition

    • mikecane

      damn…you too…she's really good at this

    • incognito

      I lost before I even realized what I was reading

      • Pat

        Haha same thing happened to me.

    • http://hermesdfo.blogspot.com Hermes

      I have mastered peripheral vision appreciation. Thanks πŸ˜€

      • Underbaker

        So you're married to?

    • Sanj

      If the staring contest is staring at her cleavage, I am kicking ass.

    • random

      I lost. I was distracted.

    • djp

      To the contrary my friend. With this picture we are truly all winners.

    • JHL1

      Oh, is it my turn for this?
      What staring contest?

    • Black6dog

      I've been staring at her cleavage since yesterday and finally made it to the comments. We may never know who the real winner is.

  • throttle

    #47, #48, #49

    You just won Tuesday

    • Master_Rahl

      weird head tilt and all, super gorgeous… plus, bewbs.

      • JHL1

        I like these pics because these.

    • TheBatman

      pattys… PATTYS!!!

    • jm2818

      Justin Beiber poster. Would not bang

      • SATexas4life

        I thought the same thing man. Was looking fiiiiiiiiine until I saw the Bieber poster. Was a complete turn off..

    • asdf

      On the contrary…EPIC FAIL for this FLBP

      the Bieber poster in #48 is the end for Her!


      • I heart chivettes

        I would ravage her on top of that disgusting poster. Goddam those are spectacular breasteses! #47 #49

      • jjj

        You know how i know you're gay.

        • The_Dood

          Normally, any post containing those words is just stupid. But here…? It's definitely true. Seriously if you noticed that picture your eyes must have been attracted to bieber. It took me a few minutes to find the poster after you brought it up.

        • El Guapo

          quite the comeback – LMAO

      • HaHa

        There is a poster in her room?

      • Sean

        A lot of hot girls have gay friends

      • http://twitter.com/rockstar_323 @rockstar_323

        I barely even noticed she had a face how the hell did you notice half of a Justin Bieber poster? You have the same poster don't you?

      • phigam

        If you noticed the poster, I've got bad news for you…

      • phigam

        If you noticed the poster, I have bad news for you…

    • dsparob

      CHIVE, please have her as the Chivette of the week!!!!

  • cashmoney

    Alright, Chive, this summer it's time to hit the East Coast. NYC MEET UP, LET'S DO THIS.

    Also, the new Batman movie is going to be EPIC

    • John

      A New York meetup is at the top of our list, actually. We're working on getting that done.

      I cannot comment about the Batman movie but you seem very excited.

      Also, your name is cashmoney

      • HatBomb

        New Orleans meet up? And KC&CO Mardi Gras edition! Just my two cents.

        • http://www.thechive.com AdamBaldick

          did that just happen

          • HatBomb

            Yeah, Mardi Gras ended recently. But its never to soon to plant the seed for next year. I didn't think of it until I saw the St. Pattys edition, but I think it makes perfect sense, you should have seen how many Chivers were at MG this year.

      • cashmoney

        It is true that my name is cashmoney. I was named after my French uncle. I hear it's a very common name in France.

        Also, your name is John

  • etcrr

    #3 stunning long legged brunette thank you

    • etcrr 126p

      Am lonely and impotent. 😦

      • etcrr

        You better go to a doctor then, cause at your age 12? you shouldn't be having or trying to have sex anyway

        • etcrr 126p

          Coz i had sex when i was 12 at my uncles house and it was not fun.

  • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

    #3 HOLY SHIT!
    That plant needs a trim!

    – the one you love to hate

    • Sean

      Hey paula go stop breathing in a small hole in the ground

    • MacNCheesePro

      WTF are you talking about?

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        Duuuhh…. the plant…. in the top right… First thing I noticed about this photo; that plant looks messy and needs to be trimmed.
        There's also a very nice lady in the photo in case you didn't notice.

        – I love nature, I shit in it

        • Huell

          You suck at life. Please tie a very heavy object to yourself and jump in deep water, preferably swarming with carnivorous fish.

        • MacNCheesePro

          Are you sure that's an untrimmed plant? I thought that was you whispering to yourself "soon…"

    • Gallus

      There's a plant in tha photo?!

  • Camper

    #6 Supercutie.

    • oh4fuckssake

      I like the last reply….."Derpina"

    • Justin

      Beyond, B-E-A-Utiful
      those eyes and everything else and if it isn't enough she's kind and cool

  • Mr Lucky

    #25 In a round about way – so do I

    • Slingshot Engage

      Nintendo Entertainment System

    • James

      HOW IS THIS DONE? Honestly, I need me one of these.

    • TDub66

      NO means….YES!

    • yoselahonda

      You do Karate Yes No, you get esquish. Just like grape. You do Karate No Yes, you get Nintendo Entertainment System. #25

  • Whoopi_G

    #45 You always win.

    • SATexas4life

      She would win every game but that wouldn't stop me from playing her every chance I got. Haha.

  • LucretiusCaro

    #12 There is something seriously wrong with this.

    • Alex

      There is a perfectly good looking couch in the background

    • Kyle429

      Only thing I see wrong with it is the kid, and that she still has clothes on. πŸ˜‰

      • Ned Plimpton

        Actually then it WOULD be seriously wrong…. As much as I LOVE neekid women πŸ˜‰

    • eddie

      Its the nasty ass soda ltr next to the chick. No one should drink that garbage..

  • etcrr

    #48 looks awesome you could only look better if it were off

    • intmid8or

      and the bieber poster wasnt on her wall, wtf

    • PensFan9

      Is anyone else bothered by the poster in the background? Maybe it's a little sister's room…

      • SilkySapper

        or daughter's

        • Giggedy

          What room?

          • googler

            It has walls?

  • MOAR

    #23 prepare the servers

    • HatBomb

      Prepare the whole fucking internet, its about to get ugly.

    • mikecane

      Hey Spotify…yeah I'm talking to you…don't f–k this up for me…

      • this guy

        i don't think Spotify would be able to handle even one t-shirt order….considering they are in the music business….

        sHoPify on the other hand better be prepared for the hellfire that chivers about to rain all over its sorry ass…

    • Heres_Johnny30

      John, by noon do you mean 11:45?

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        No, he actually means noon.
        Inside info: John always posts the "*Update: SOLD OUT* update immediately after the gallery goes life. Takes him 3 seconds. The shirts are sold out in 2 seconds of course. So he's still late.

        – Fan testimonial: "Apparently they have Chive in hell."

        • Heres_Johnny30

          Looks like I was right Paula! That was not noon.

    • Corwin

      I don't think the shirt ordering process keeps true to the whole Keep Calm philosophy of TheChive.

    • Jason

      What happened to randomly putting the shirts up rather than announcing the time for everyone?

    • tommytwotime

      this is the internet version of releasing the Kraken

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        Hmpf, by comparison the Chive releasing shirts makes the Kraken look like a newborn kitty trying to claw your face open with those cute little pawsies that don't even have nails yet…

        – I like to eat newborn cats; no risk of those pesky nails getting stuck in your throat

    • that_ALBANIAN_guy

      Predicted that shit the day they announced there would be more … sometime in the near future.

      Its always 12noon PST. Always.

    • Ned Plimpton

      What happened to Johns statement last week that the shirts would be sold at a random time without warning to keep non Chivers from buying 10 shirts and loyal Chivers the possibility of getting just 1??

      You're a fucking idiot, John. Don't even want your shirts anymore.

      • Ned Plimpton

        Having said that, I'll continue being a loyal Chiver.

        But fuck you and your shirts.

  • Ghad

    #45 – you win. you always win

    #11 MORE

    • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

      Here ya go sweety:
      <img src="http://i.imgur.com/qaXfA.jpg"&gt;
      – Fan testimonial: "As much as I have tried to dislike you, you are really starting to grow on me. Almost a sic addiction."

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