Daily Afternoon Randomness (53 Photos)

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  • theViRUS

    First

    • Seth_Michaels

      Nice work!

    • labatanga

      Is there no God? I curse thee.

    • RacistChiver

      #17 – not narrow enough CHAN

  • brit

    #40

    There's not enough women like that here in England

    • Turbodude

      Sorry dude but there aren't enough women like that anywhere…most women in my town have two asses.

      • Samisthebest

        Ha I'm an English bird…and most blokes here have a beer gut the size of a beach ball!

        • Matt

          Clearly you're looking at the wrong guys πŸ˜‰

    • mattgn

      try ireland, its paddys day this weekend they will all be out

      • Adam

        Yeah, and i live in Cheltenham, AGH!

    • Francois

      start by casing the 1 cosmetic dentist's office in your country.

      • niglett

        What point are you making – just another lazy stereotype which is 40 years out of date. Grow up

        • Francois

          If you had ever been to england you would see that some stereotypes are grounded in truth

          • F.S.M.

            Been there; Went all over. I found friendly people, great beer, and beautiful women with HUGE breasts. People like you are why the rest of the world hates Americans. To all our foreign chivers: We are not all bible thumping, racist, ethnocentric assholes. Some of us actually get an education and an understanding that we are not the center of the universe. Chive on from across the pond!

            • JOHN

              yes some of us are pretentious know it all assholes who think that anyone who doesn't prescribe to our "progressive" ideology is an idiot without an education. Some of us like to bitch about how unfair the world is and kiss your foreign asses because we have no clue as to what the principles of the United States actually represent.

              • dirtysteve99

                What do those principle represent John?

          • niglett

            Even more intellectually lazy than your first post – and so what? I still don't understand why you have to bring us your lazy, ignorant and small minded prejudices here which are as completely irrelevant. as they are untrue. Is it your mission to post irrelevant comments that make you look like a bit of an idiot?

            And if you have met any poor americans you would shut up about the state of other nation's teeth – unbelievable

            • JOHN

              How do you know the guy is an American? btw "niglett" as though that isn't offensive. And yes I have seen the drawing of a black piglet from Winnie the pooh. You're calling this guy small minded yet making a lot of judgments and prejudicial remarks yourself. Just saying.

    • Neil

      dont know where you looking mate but everywhere i have been in the UK has very nice women indeed. especially London and Liverpool…..Wow…

  • Whoopy

    #5 I did it too

    • Andrew

      Multiple alerts here

      • miss AK

        why aren't there any for our servicewomen?

  • TROLL

    Kael Schryver still makes out with little boys.

    • JHL1

      First (to reply to the troll)

  • dude

    #28

    I'd have sex with you

    feel better?

    • http://twitter.com/JDCampbe11 @JDCampbe11

      BOO THIS MAN!

      • Rick Derris

        I am just saying that maybe if she would wash her hair once and a while it might help… she looks like she has a CSX train load of crazy that comes with her… there is a reason you are alone sweetie…

    • Jimmy Bags

      I second that, dude.

    • http://www.youtube.com/user/ADHDavenger13?feature=mhsn Firefighter23

      dude, come on! Girls aren't like most guys. They have these things call "emotions." The need to be loved and stuff to feel better about themselves. Saying you'd have sex with them is making them feel like an object, such as a couch cushion, and therefore not a person. What you should say is: Miss, you are very beautiful and I would like to arrange a date with you sometime if you would like. Girls dig that shit.

      • Kris

        … so when can we get to the fucking? Sorry dude, I couldn't resist. πŸ˜›

      • peanut3603

        I'm guessing you're stuck in the friend zone with every woman you know.

        • Jeff

          I'm guessing you have never had an adult relationship.

        • http://www.youtube.com/user/ADHDavenger13?feature=mhsn Firefighter23

          Peanut, you nailed it!

      • jon

        Thats why youre still a virgin living in your mom's basement.

      • Eric

        If she's posting a PICTURE and looking to feel better solely from a PICTURE, she's looking for compliments on her looks only. The original poster is absolutely doing the correct thing. If she wanted comments on her being/personality, she wouldn't try to feel better by posting a pic here.

        • Gustopholous

          She didn't post the pic… Her friend did.

          • Cowthang

            if you believe that you're dumber than I could possibly imagine

            • Rick Derris

              If anyone believes that bull shit story that it is her friend submitting for her then they really have a hard road ahead of them in life…..
              She is simply fishing for a complement……..

              • docbrown88mph

                Sigh.

                Why do pretty girls (the girl above has, at the very least, above average looks) constantly do shit like this? "Oh, my 'friend' is feeling ugly today, please tell 'her' she is beatiful!!" Come on, seriously? And shame on you chive, for playing her game.

      • The Milkman

        You have sex with couch cushions?

        • From_The_Hip

          LOL! Fucking awesome!!

        • Rick Derris

          boom goes the dynamite…..

    • ComeAtMeBro

      I second that motion!

    • yousck

      Yeah, I'm sure she feels better knowing that you douchebag

      • wtevr

        R u fucking serious…SHE cant find anyone…..try actually being ugly and come back to me.

        • oopieceac4ndy

          Suprised she's even single

          • gotta be fresh

            Probably because she's blowing of a hand full of guys that she stuck in the "friend zone".

            • JOHN

              Maybe try to figure out why you are in the friend zone in the first place instead of bitching about it all the time. There are 3.5 billion women on the planet and you are obsessed (not in love) with the one who sees you as a wimp. Oh and she sees you this way because of the things YOU DO not because she is being spiteful. You had your opportunity from the start to be a man but months or years of ingratiating and deprecating yourself has you in this spot forever. There is no upward mobility. GROW A PAIR and MOVE ON.

              • http://www.youtube.com/user/ADHDavenger13?feature=mhsn Firefighter23

                You realize you just told the chick you said you'd have sex with the grow a pair? Dude that's some sick shit.

                • passwordistaco

                  I'm pretty sure he was talking to the guy bitching about the friend zone.

    • Vee

      She's cute, she needs to cheer up as there are a hell of a lot of guys in the world.. I mean shit, try living in Alaska where a guy/girl ratio is 10:1…. that's some fucked up odds for a guy. Anyway cheer up you're cute and I'd love to see more of ya!

      • Rick Derris

        really not very cute to be honest….. looks like she needs a shower STAT!

    • Royce

      I'd take her out to a classy steak dinner… I'd even let someone else cook… And I'd pay.

    • JOHN

      tell your friend that I would be happy to destroy her vagina with my penis that I recently discovered was appreciably above average in length and girth… booya

      • Anaphylaxis

        <sarcasm>You sure do us credit. Thank you for your uplifting and motivational statement…</sarcasm>

        • Francois

          enjoy fucking the wife that wishes you were someone else or continuing to be shunned by women who do not see you as a man but as a boy.

          • Anaphylaxis

            Was that to me (Anaphylaxis)? Or to the OP?

            • Francois

              You

              • Anaphylaxis

                Well fuck you bitch!!!! Fucking frenchie piece of shit…

      • JOHN

        all the thumbs down must be jealousy

        • JHL1

          No, it means your comments suck.

    • who cares

      I'd take her out for a nice seafood dinner and then call her the next day

      • I care

        you are a lonely dude who does not know how to get laid, but you apparently have mastered how to enter the friend zone….

    • nerdchaser

      I feel like that too girly.
      My boyfriend decided to take back his ex
      His ex that cheated on him and is now pregnant by ANOTHER guy
      She must have good head game
      Lets be "forever alone" together? πŸ˜‰

      • passwordistaco

        shoot girl. I can recite Pi to 30 decimals. Reason, observation, and experience are the holy trinity of science. I have my own Spock costume. Me and my friends reenact Star Wars scenes. I'm lying me and my "imaginary" friends reenact Star Wars scenes! I might just be too much nerd to handle πŸ™‚

        • nerdchaser

          The arcade is my favorite place for a date.
          FYI lol

          • passwordistaco

            Well those ARE quarters in my pocket. wait…..

          • passwordistaco

            So, Punch Out! or Zelda?

    • Cecil

      Does she have pie?

    • Travis

      How is this girl alone… i dont get it

      • JOHN

        because looks aren't everything even for a woman. She could be a nightmare and there is no way to tell from 1 photo.

        • nerdchaser

          Because just like you men swear us women do it but you men do it to
          Have an AMAZING person who wants to do nothing but good to you but yet you choose the slut, whore, or chick that is obviously not going to last more than 3 months with you.
          There will never be world peace because people can not accept being happy.

          • Royce

            Now if you gorgeous women are looking for a bad boy… I don't mean to brag… But I can swim without floaties.

            • Kay

              ^ HAHA
              I think thats a little too BA to handle….

      • Broadstrokes

        Not to be a hater, but it might help if her eyebrows weren't painted on.

    • CaNaDaaa

      great eyes and smile …

    • Barney Stinson

      Guys, She's super cute yes. BUT, have you ever thought the possibility that she might be crazy. You don't know this person at all. How do you know she's not a code 5 clinger? Saying I love you after your first week of hanging out. Who knows… she could be the girl that got that guys face tattooed on her arm after a week of hanging out. Remember that post? It was hilarious. Maybe she has a gnarly case of the herp. Maybe shes super sensitive and cries when you accidentally say oh your friend is cute. Maybe she's forever alone because she has no personality and you can't have a conversation with her. I love looking at hot girls as much as you. But don't judge a book by the cover. DONT YOU GUYS KNOW ABOUT THE BARNEY STINSON CRAZY VS HOT GRAPH?? SUIT UP!

      • Rick Derris

        she is definitely crazy look at her….

    • MikeyC

      Christfag bitch detected. Good luck getting this delusional bitch with her dry cunt in bed…

      • Guest

        My thoughts exactly.

      • Ben

        "Christfag"? My aren't we civil? Shall I refer to you as "Dawkinsqueer?"

    • Rick

      She's rockin' the old Pagan symbol (Feminine, "fish" on end, before the "fish" was co-opted by one of those new, trendy religions and put on its side). Bangin'!

    • Adam M.

      Don't worry about being alone. Try to cheer up and look on the bright side of things. Enjoy your life and don't worry about what you don't have.

    • Guest

      I would do the sex. But, relationship…not until she takes that shit off her neck.

      • that guy

        yes to the sex. relationship.. yes if she makes me a sandwich.

    • Jimm

      She's pretty amazing as I see it. Cheer up babe.

  • etcrr

    #40 beautiful British Chivette

    • http://twitter.com/McBeastie666 @McBeastie666

      no shit.

    • etcrr's goat

      shut up you old pervert….

      • C'mon man

        If you're going to troll Stan, please step it up a bit. Thanks.

  • hark1985

    #1 I must go! My people need me

    • shad

      Thanks for the fishes

      • JHL1

        *So long and thanks for all the fish.

    • MonkeyMadness

      Fuck gravity!

  • fred flinstone

    MCQUILLING EMPLOYEES GET BACK TO WORK!!

    • LOL

      OH NOES!!!!!!!!!!

    • Kris

      Fuck you, you prick. All I do is work day and day out for next to nothing. I can barely pay my bills while jackoffs like you drive around in expensive luxury cars. I have a Master's Degree and because of people like you investing poorly and fucking up our economy this is the best I can do. Therefore, if I want to Chive at work, I'm going to Chive at work! Oh, and the whole human resources division is doing it, so if you have to balls come down and tell us to our faces!

      • wee

        *day in and day out

        • The Pict

          Good to see his being a loser is still not his own fault.

      • Bill Lumbergh

        mmmm…Kris…we are going to have have a meeting about this…mmmmmmmkay

      • advice

        If this is real, you're a dumbass. Nobody owes you anything. Take what you can and then work your way up. Learn some respect. And don't burn bridges.

        • Cecil

          I hope someone makes you redundant after running your pension into the bog, turd. I am getting about a dozen bachelors + per week, who are pursuing 8.50 an hour jobs. They worked hard, did everything they were supposed to, and some jackass laid them off so he could buy another Ferrari. Let's see you pay off a BA on 8.50 with 11 other people clambering for the same job.

  • gary

    #19 because boobs

    • Doda

      milky white skin sexy

    • Tomas

      "So, after you carefully remove the bullet from the casing, you take the casing like this… bring it up to your nostril… and breathe in reeeeeal quick through your nose. Here, you try."

    • gotta be fresh

      I just air motor boated…

  • etcrr

    #49 how are we suppose to KCCO with you flaunting your hot ass around? πŸ™‚

    • BloodScrubber

      Makes it tough with a compass in your pants. πŸ˜‰

  • johnston

    #53

    that is one helluva sideboob

    • MattKL

      It is epic indeed.

    • bull1123

      Just. Damn.

    • mike

      Love!

    • good jeff

      you know it's a great set when the bra holds down the boobs! #52 #53

      • varlotto

        she does have great boobs but you can just get a size smaller bra if you want your boobs to get held down

      • guest

        We miss you Alicia post MOAR!!!!

    • OpMongoose

      This is a specImen of side boob. It is known as Class 5, which is the highest much like a tornado. That is all.

    • Dale

      Sweet mother of god!!!

    • MonkeyMadness

      No doubt! She gives me one helluva boner!

    • Unclechevy

      Ugly crap on her arm. Sucks when chicks do that.

    • its_forge

      That's not sideboob, that's boob.

  • hark1985

    #6 Holy shit. Forever loner creepy

    • smallchinaman

      I'm guessing he likes to have penis inside him

    • seanrk924

      barney stinson after losing his mojo ala austin powers goldmember?

  • http://www.cupcakesbymartha.com MarthaJeane

    #8 – like a boss #10 – a more legit excuse for the hover method

  • Taco_Depot

    #6 You will not take my virginity. NEVER!

    • MonkeyMadness

      The dog has already taken his virginity. πŸ˜›

  • acr33

    #10, great, now i can never use a toilet again.

    • lonin

      After the one with the spiders, I check every time anyway.

    • Voice of Reason

      I would say he went about that the correct way… I would probably use a shotgun but that's just me

    • Daniel Tosh

      This went through the TSA (Toilet Safety Administration) my God does guys are idiots.

    • Ken

      Or, you can leave the bathroom for about ten minutes and come back at which time the pissed-off Cribo would have crawled out of the toilet.

      But the sledge is another way to go, I guess.

      • Matt

        Meanwhile, in Australia……
        It's either a Brown snake (4th most venemous snake in the world)
        or a Taipan (No 1) What's the problem???

  • MassChiver

    #14 #49 #51
    Good Loarrrd!. Is it me or are Chivettes getting hotter and hotter. Thanks to all Chivettes

    • MattKL

      Agreed, the Chivettes have really been stepping up their game lately.

    • Tim

      #14 is Air Force if anyone cares to know….

      • 1iJack

        then why does she have a Navy uniform under her bed?

        • Navyadam

          Is absolutely Navy! You can see the NAM in the window and the NWU's under the bed.

      • that girl

        i want to know why her panties are ripped

  • Whoopi_G

    #19 Can you please help me pick up my change?

  • Edjar

    #28 I'd be happy to not make her forever alone. Just sayin.

    • yousck

      Yeah but you don't know her….she's probably alone for a reason

      • Edjar

        Nothing wrong with giving it a shot though. You never know.

        • Rick Derris

          you are a sad man if you are willing to date a crazy bitch just because of one picture and a bullshit story on the chive….

    • Fog Ducker

      My advice to you Ms. Beautiful, go after the exact opposite of the kind of guy you usually date!

      • Del

        Dont Just the Dog Fucker.

    • don

      I would pack her mud whistle. I would atm her to cheer her up.

  • http://twitter.com/economistnick @economistnick

    #28 #38 #40 Goddesses!!!!

    • SMT

      my mouse slipped and i clicked thumbs down. didnt mean to. so add a million more, or just one more, thumbs up to this.

      • Rick Derris

        no, I thumbed down on purpose..

    • hud

      nice unibrow 38.

  • Jack_LeMac

    #2 I dunno about NCAA but I knew I was gonna get some time with my friend Bill Nye

    • MattKL

      Bill Nye is the man, but I always preferred Beakman.

    • The Stadium Guy...

      Answer is: Who is the science guy?

      • The OG is

        Mr Wizard

    • Jewels

      My students get all excited when I wire the laptop to the progector….. cus they know it means Bill Nye! He still gets the gets excited!

      • billy2hats

        spelling …….. you're doing it right

        • Frank

          I assume you're talking about "progetcor" and thinking it should be "projector." Actually the progector is a much cooler version of the projector that is being used to today to air Bill Nye to the gets. Get your facts straight.

  • Whoopi_G

    #53 Thanks for that one!

    • SATexas4life

      We will be needing more!

  • etcrr

    #4 poor puppy

    • etcrr

      Thank you Captain Obvious,

    • Rick Derris

      you are such a fucking tool, why don't you take your walker out into traffic to play for awhile?

  • Turbodude

    Thanks but I'm really not a chiver……don't want to buy a t-shirt.
    #14

    • johnston

      and yet you logged in I see πŸ™‚

      • Patches

        It's possible to look at some funny photos on a website without feeling the desire to call yourself stupid names in order to fit in with a group of other people who over-value the same website. I look at this site more days than not, but I am NOT a "chiver"… I am a guy who has real friends in real life, and I like to look at amusing photos on the internet when I'm bored.

    • Turbodude

      Ok ok I'm a chiver…..kind of like admitting that you have a drinking problem. Hi my name is Steve and I have a Chiving problem. Oh Hi Steve and welcome to our Chivers anonymous meeting. Please have a seat and tell us a little about yourself……..

      • Turbodude

        Well I used to lead a happy constructive life and then one day I stumbled upon this site called theChive and yes my life is admittedly fuller and I am a happier person yet I CANT GET ANYTHING DONE ANYMORE….all I want to do is hit refresh all day long so I can get a post on the first page.

        • KeepinCalm

          I get the rapid drunk (regretful…i know) turbo posting…she's hot, she has a rip in her shorts, AND she's cool….as a chiver should be

    • 2pumpdump

      Looks like pic was taken at the state pen.

      • its_forge

        Do they let you have fancy underwear in prison?

    • biggles

      Could it be paige from american guns? Oh man, looks like her hair color and length. She also has a tattoo you can see on the right side hip.

      hmmmmm

      • MattyDeuce

        Paige from American Guns is 16, creep.

    • KDog

      Air Force girl…check out the decoration

  • hark1985

    #47 about to fail in 3…2…1

    • JHL1

      Except that she probably was doing a hand stand on the platform and then rolled over… much to your disappointment.

    • Jj12

      #47 that brings up bad memories of that Russian diver that died in the Olympics a few years back, doing that. Platform dive, back flip, cracked skull, bloody water. Not pretty.

      • sadman

        1983, Sergei Chalibashvili.

  • Jack_LeMac

    #10 Yep, seems about the best way to handle that

    • http://facebook.com/daaneskjold Chazz_B

      either that or some dynamite

      • matt

        fuck that.. kill it… kill it with fire.

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