Daily Morning Awesomeness (30 Photos)

  • hater

    #1. Too close for missiles, I'm switching to guns.

    • MattKL

      I was wondering when they'd get around to making Hot Shots! Part 3.

    • Hogghar

      to kto sem dal? 😀 😀 :O… FIRST awesome pic from slovakia 😀 on theChive!!!

    • Logicyup

      That would be awesome to drive around, especially at night with some asshole behind ya with their brights or fog lights on (sorry but if you drive with fog lights on when there isn't any fog, you suck ass) and light up them after burners.

    • bud

      Grand Theft Auto 5 looks badass!

    • LooWho?

      best first comment I've seen in awhile…..

      • Ha ha....

        I'll second that!

  • Ender84

    #9 Great! We eliminated duck face only to have it replaced by fish face…

    PS – you're still totally hot

    • tron

      that hand dryer is stong…it blew her glasses apart.

    • House

      The problem is that they are blowing recycled bathroom shit air into their mouths

      • Habsy

        So she likes ATM. My kinda gal.

    • Bollyver

      A lot of fecal matter and urine crystals blow out of those things.

      • Jack_LeMac

        lol urine crystals

    • HatBomb

      Thats right honey, stretch it out.

  • BigPup

    #9 assume the position…

    • Baer

      photoshop…you know what to do

    • tapsnapornap

      That was my immediate thought, but then it went to "how are her glasses attached to her face?"

      • mike

        yeah…and where is the temple on her left side?

  • Abc

    I know I'm first…thumbs down to me…or thumbs up 🙂

    • What squad

      I'll thumbs up because I like hump day…

      • rich

        I'll thumbs up because people who get mad at people who post "first" are cocksuckers.

    • avidd

      I'll thumbs down because your not first.

      • http://www.facebook.com/emily.gosling Emily Celeste Gosling

        I'll thumbs down yours because you don't know the difference between your and you're which makes you the thing that sucks the most about the Internet.

        • MylesofStyles

          I'll thumb you up because Nazi chicks are kinky.

          • JHL1

            I'm not thumbing anybody!

  • Me.

    #1 Jet, you are drunk..

    • mike~

      Gives new meaning to "D U HIGH'

  • Ender84

    #9 Great! We eliminated duck face only to have it replaced by fish face…

    • Ender84

      Whoops! Did I just spam the comments? How did I do that? I didn't mean to double post…sorry Chivers

    • Whamma

      Blow fish 😮

    • homerpimpson

      Photoshopped glasses…wtf?

  • Dylan

    One of the First!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

  • http://cinemaplastique.tumblr.com MigraineBoy

    #29 Bottomless bathroom literally scares the shit out of you.

    • DaddyD

      Scares the piss out of me.

    • http://www.facebook.com/btounge Benjamin Tounge

      is this a painting or real?

      • stumeister

        Either way ! Imagine going for a piss the first time in that bathroom after a heavy night

      • Kmac

        Looks real, like its an elevator shaft. Also you can see the supports for the glass.

    • dominantone

      imagine waking up from a night of drinking on that floor.

      • Optimus_prime

        That first step's a doozy

    • therealguy

      it's a 15th floor penthouse in guadalajara, mexico. the bathroom was installed over an unused elevator shaft

    • http://4chan.org/b gnocco

      coolest shitter i've seen in awhile.

  • BigPup

    #12 am I the only one who is reminded of the egg fields in Alien?

  • Too Blunt.

    #9 Getting blown in your face…You're doing it wrong..

  • Hello

    #29 why is that there? Probably one of the scariest shits you'll ever take.

    • otto

      imagine waking up from being drunk on that floor

      • dominantone

        I thought the same thing.

    • Dr_StrangePants

      honestly whats the story here?
      Do i get watch my fecal matter plummet down a bottomless pit?

      • sploodge

        thats what i wanna know, and will i see it hit a bottom? or is it a bottomless shit pit?

    • Jose Jimenez

      But it'd come out quicker than ever. It takes me a half hour after I've had my morning coffee. Good thing I stopped drinking it during my hour commute.

    • Dag

      Apparently you've never eaten at Arby's.

  • cody

    Anyone in Houston wanna play Pogs? I just found my badass slammer in the closet.

    • Billy

      Sure meet me at Hooters in Pasadena at noon. I'll be the one wearing parachute pants………….

      • April C.

        Rayburn Texans FTW!

  • I assume..

    #17 Yes, but they were all ugly and treated it like shit..

    • rich

      hehe, this reminds me of the episode of "the simpsons" where homer designs a car. but seriously, they probably went through a lot of design ideas before settling on this one.

  • RandomTask09

    #29: Oh hell no!! I'd shit before reaching the commode."

    • Dr_StrangePants

      i'd piss my pants before ever reaching the toilet

      • DaddyD

        Mission accomplished.

  • Brent

    #13 wtf is the point of this???

    • Logicyup

      I've learned it's best to just look at things like these for a second, maybe go "huh?" and just mentally erase it. Much better to think about breakfast at this hour, or sex, or sex for breakfast.

      • Tko

        Prolly a rehab device.

        • tapsnapornap

          Yeah it looks like it holds a lot of your weight so you don't jar your joints so much.

    • http://www.facebook.com/sykofun Evie Rose

      maybe a running apparatus for cripples who need walkers

      • R-Dub

        I dont think "cripples" is the proper nomenclature Donny.

        • goglas

          cool word…..haven't got a clue what it means

  • vag

    #15 Is going to haunt my dreams

    • Butthole surfer

      Slipknot's masks just aren't what they used to be.

    • Cookie

      Seriously, UGH

  • Rollout25

    #9 Why are the glasses photoshopped on her?

    • Robtoad

      Do she would look smrt? Missed an ear piece though dumb blonde

    • CarRamRod

      Morpheus style glasses. no earpiece needed.

    • mith

      She didn't want to embarrass her family.

    • JMass

      For her own safety

    • sean

      im thinking the glasses broke and she was leaning into the hands dryer so they'd stay on her face.

    • Aran

      probably to make her look like shes not 15…

    • OhSomeEvil

      I have the weirdest boner right now.

  • MattKL

    #26 FTW

    • Kyle

      MIT Green Building

      • Kevin

        Glad to see my college finally getting a pic

  • Logicyup

    #5 I would never leave that. I love tree houses. Anyone know where this is, if it's for sale, or maybe if a hostile take over is possible?

    • Alex

      I'm pretty sure its at Shambahla in Salmo, BC.

    • CharlieG_TX

      You can try a hostile takeover, but I'm pretty sure they have a pretty strong water balloon defense.

    • Jmann

      It is in cave junction Oregon called out'n'about. I spent two days there's on my honey moon there they have one he'll of a zip line course there as well

    • Moe-Narey

      No it's not shambhala although it dose kind of look like the village stage!

  • sotl

    #29 it puts the lotion on it's skin or else it gets the hose agaiiin.

    • KillinTime

      That's what I first thought, someone remodeled buffalo bills place.

  • Holden Magroin

    #29 wouldnt make poo there

    • Brad

      No choice. Would make poo right in my pantaloons…

      • http://twitter.com/theterryburke @theterryburke

        i wanna give extra props for the use of "pantaloons"

  • RandomTask09

    #11: "Sorry about the mess, but no more blue balls."

    • zinzat

      Sure as hell put the fire out!

    • darsh

      is that coming out of a Dickies store?

    • Si1entStatic

      the rarely seen street view of TheChive HQ after editing the hump day post………..since we only ever see the boardwalk side.

  • Jojo

    #19 Friend!

    • Bob

      Bel-lok

    • JHL1

      *Mellon

  • :/.

    #29 I want to let my feet dangle while I let one go.. my toilet will never be the same.

  • http://facebook.com/cre8ivdzine Bryan_W

    #9 I guess this is kind of like, stretching before your performance?

    • Engco431

      Can't run a marathon cold…

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