A Hulk sized clusterf#^* (5 Photos)

Via Odditycentral

  • douche baggins

    Bahahaha what a shithead

    • suburb

      This will surely appease those who want more black people on Chive.

      • NYChive

        And green people!

    • wgreaney

      please leave the chive we don't like people like you here.

      • observer

        the little thumbs tell me you are the one that is not liked. perhaps you should take your own advice now.

  • Mr. Green


  • some guy

    Smashing idea!

  • Doctor U.S.

    How come The Hulk's pants didn't rip off with the rest of his clothes when he transformed from Eric Bana? Inquiring minds want to know.

    • Trav1121

      Bruce Banner. Eric Bana was just the bad actor from the bad version. Shame on you, Ang Lee. But kudos for Jennifer Connally. That women will never be not hot! And to answer your question, because he has stretchy pants… or they didn't allow nudity in kids comics, back in the day. Still don't. Whichever answer makes you happier, Doc! 🙂

      • Willie

        When you are a man…sometimes you wear stretchy pants…

        • Woop


    • Xenore

      go into you're closet and grab a button down shirt. try and tear is as hard as you can… it rips fairly easily. now do the same with a pair of jeans. nearly impossible. the proof is in the pudding

    • Herby Sagues

      The increase in size, as is usual with body builders, was compensated by a decrease in the groin area.

  • MrCoffeeman


    • Dutch Paint

      Respect? For covering himself with industrial paint? He's a fucking idiot and so are you.

  • http://www.facebook.com/justincredable71 Justin Lentz

    Such a tard

  • 2Dogs

    Its not easy being green

    • RealZoo

      Glad to know, Kermit!

    • Jrg

      Funny on many levels

  • Beavis

    "..industrial paint normally used for (…) submarines.." Yeah, that will come off in the shower!

    • Arielle

      Seems legit.

    • Orcslayer

      how did he lay hands on that paint???

      • cDubya

        That's what I want to know. That paint is for ADCAP torpedoes on submarines, and we don't even carry the paint onboard.

  • https://www.facebook.com/markawol Mark Wolcott

    I am def not green with envy.

  • https://www.facebook.com/allanreyesphoto Allan Reyes



    News of the Weird
    Hulk can't get green paint off
    By QMI Agency

    A Brazilian man has tried everything short of gamma rays to get the green body paint off his skin after he dressed as the Hulk for a charity run.

    According to the Brazilian newspaper Extra, Paulo Henrique dos Santos dressed up as the angry Marvel hero for the Challenge for Peace run in Rio de Janeiro, a fitting costume for the muscular man.

    But after 20 baths, he still can't get the body paint off.

    "I spent hours in the bath trying to get this makeup and nothing," the 35-year-old said, in a quote roughly translated from Portuguese. "I had to ask for help from my girlfriend. The worst is that the ink has not decreased. The product is impregnated in my body. Even rubbing soap, still green." To sleep, he's had to cover the floor of his bedroom with plastic bags.

    Worried that his new green exterior will hamper his jobs as a pool cleaner and DJ/singer, or worse, give him lead poisoning, he plans to sue the store and the manufacturer. He didn't say what brand of body paint he used.

    "I was happy to run in my community and show the world that we have good here, and disclose my work as a singer," he said. "Now I'm very sad, not knowing what to do. I am embarrassed by this situation."

    • Guest

      So body paint will give you lead poisoning?….

      • map

        If it has lead in it…..

        • Guest

          Who would use body paint that has lead in it?

          • HUH?

            um, that guy?

    • http://www.facebook.com/joeltodd Joel Todd

      I don't see the difference?

      • Patches

        Chive left out the part where he's planning on suing the store and manufacturer for his own stupidity.

    • usmc_chiver

      Chive's version was better…

      • Chive

        Awwwww, yeah! Suck that dick……

      • Jr. Joon

        are you fucking stupid? the chive making up a story is better than what actually happened?

        • usmc_chiver

          Yes, the Chive's made up story is better than what actually happened. Have you never been to theonion.com? Sometimes a made up story is way the fuck better than the truth. So a story about submarine paint not washing off with water is funnier than some body paint didn't work.

          • Jr. Joon

            no whats the onion.com? Ive never been on the internet before.

            • R-Dub

              What the fuck is the internet?!!

        • https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=654840083 Mike

          how did they make up a story? They left something out, how do you make that up?
          Maybe the story they read wasnt updated?

          • Jr. Joon

            Stretch the truth* sorry fag

            • usmc_chiver

              alright listen chief – when theChive becomes a news provider, you let us know. Until then, it doesn't even matter – they were sharing a funny incident that happened and you're getting all bent out of shape because it wasn't "accurate" .

              You want the real story? Why don't you go down to Brazil and tell us how many licks it takes to get that green paint off the guy's dick.

              • Jr. Joon

                faggots like you are whats wrong with this site you eat this bullshit up. Sorry I want something to be real when I read it. Are you saying the chive is a fake/ comedic news site like the onion? I already did go down there and his dick tasted like your dads asshole

                • Jr. Joon


                  • usmc_chiver

                    so you sucked this dude's dick, and ate out my dad's asshole, but I'M the faggot?!? I'm not eating up any shit (ha – you see what I did there?), but this is a comedic site. The site's title is "Funny Photos and Funny Videos" and you're sucking dude's dicks because the story said industrial paint and the dude claims he used body paint (that just so happened to not wash off).

                    • Ass Grease

                      Don't fall victim to trolls. Semper fidelis on.

                • Jawbone

                  As long as you can tell the difference between different cocks and assholes, tough guy.

              • Jr. Joon

                so does that mean that soldier who got his arms and legs blown off didnt actually get his arms and legs blown off and thats a fabrication too

  • stash

    Paulo: "is it still real noticeable?"
    Friend: "dude, you can barely even tell"

  • Eric

    The last pic, "The Hulk's" right hand is above his same forearm.

    • Jmb

      How bad/old is the screen you are looking at? I'm looking on an iPhone and I can tell its not.

      • Eric

        You're right. Had to look it at it again. I need better eyes

        • Brutal_Deluxe

          I have a whole crate full of eyes if you're in the market. I stole them from a circus clown.

  • Brutal_Deluxe

    The only option here is to just leave it on and act like the Hulk full time.

  • LanceD

    Back in high school, my friend decided to go to a Halloween party as "dead ". He took blue food coloring and applied it to his face, arms and chest. It was an interesting few days while the stuff wore off.

    • elguapo80

      nobody cares bout ur life

  • Jones

    Ahh Brazil…making America look smart for over 100 years.

    • U.Sam

      Ahhh, America, making the rest of the world look poor and stupid. . .

      • moon101

        You do know that America has the biggest debt owed in all the world and the U.S dollar has gone from being a power house to just a common buck, so making the world look poor lol you let me know when your 9 Trillion dollars is paid off….

        • Brutal_Deluxe

          Comedy site, people. Focus!

        • zaffa

          Americas economy is still a power house compared to most. Every one hates america until you need them.

        • U.Sam

          And the United States still has the world's largest and most powerful economy with a GDP of over $15 trillion–which, you fucking retard, is 25% of the TOTAL GDP of the entire fucking planet.

          A 'common' buck, idiot? 60% of the WORLD'S currency reserves are invested in the US dollar. Where is the Euro? Not even close, you fucking moron.

          Which cesspool of a nation do you wallow in, asshole? Doesn't matter. It's 'wealth' would be pocket change for the United States.

          The simple fact is that the United States is the wealthiest nation on the planet, has the largest economy, is the largest trading nation in history, and you just can't stand it. Go fuck yourself.

          • 09434

            lol how's not being part of the wealthy working for you sam?

          • moon101

            I love it, I simply love it…
            So give it 5 more years and your dollar will be worthless, you went from being 1.5 to the Canadian dollar to the Canadian dollar being 1.2 to yours lol talk about a reverse cow girl…

            And just b.c you raise your debt seal for what was it the third time? i lost track sorry but just b.c you raised it does not mean in any way that you own that money just simply means you can borrow yourself more into debt… and i could give a shit about the euro lol

            and i get that the world is invested in the US dollar, that was done a long long time ago.. doesn't mean its a good idea now. plus i dont mind the states i like the states and i cant stand you all just fine.. its the comments of manifest destiny crap that get me going KCCO big guy i think you need it 🙂

            • Brutal_Deluxe

              What's a debt seal? And why do you lose count at three? There are a lot of questions here that I need answered but we'll start with these two, lest you lose track once again.

        • Desi

          Let me know when whatever country you live in no longer depends on the US. . .

      • China

        Shut up, bitch. We own you(literally and academically).

        • Not Really

          We owe most of the money to ourselves, you fucking idiot.

      • salem

        trust me you have not seen rich yet!! just sayin

  • http://www.funnypicturespro.com/14100/a-hulk-sized-clusterf-5-photos/ A Hulk sized clusterf#^* (5 Photos) | Funny Pictures Pro

    […] From: theCHIVE » FAIL […]

  • etcrr

    Live and learn my friend, at least he was doing good for charity

    • Chris Hansen

      just like i'm doing my part by voting you down.

    • yup

      Fuck you etcrr…and makes sense he's your friend cuz you both are super docuhes

      • Bill57

        don't fuck with stan hes a badass and he'll make you end up with egg on your face to go with the bullshit on your face now go play in traffic and have a nice day

  • Big Red

    He's cleaning him self with a toilet bowl scrub brush……

    • weldsoft

      Maybe it was new…

    • Steven B

      omfg i was scrolling through all the comments to see if someone else noticed that! haha! I noticed it on the first pick and did one of these… o.0

  • Jrg

    He's suing the store where he got the paint.

  • http://thechive.com LukeTheTerrible

    I've heard of yellow submarines, but not green.

    • cDubya

      Yeah, the paint is for torpedoes, not the submarine itself.

      • http://thechive.com LukeTheTerrible

        Cool – I never knew

  • chicago

    in thinking about this, never have I seen the Hulk read anything before going ape-shit. so why would this guy read paint labels for clean up information. Hulk no read letters, hulk mad.

    • Brutal_Deluxe

      Hulk recognize squiggles from coloring books and pudding cups

  • Daith_Lee

    I like how no matter what, dude has to look "chill" when a photo opportunity arises despite the situation ….and even funnier is that its still more expressions than Kristen Stewart ever had.

  • Mackster87

    this guy sucks at life hahahaha how would he even get his hands on such paint to begin with…

    • checkplease

      You don't have a ballistic missile and nuclear submarine paint store down your street? What evs.

  • https://www.facebook.com/hannah.fontenot Hannah Fontenot


    • Vent187

      You get a zero for the day.

  • Jim

    What a moran.

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