Daily Morning Awesomeness (30 Photos)

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  • COCHESE kramer

    #5 what a babe

    • Jumped the shark

      Jesus fuck! This is all shit from previous days. Go to reddit and repost some newer content you fucks

      • Kicked the shark

        Or Keep Calm And Chive On.. Stay on Chive and it won't be a repost! O.o

    • BruceWayne

      Very hot I love Coke. 😉
      #11 Why do women on a nerd site think guns are sexy?
      It's not.

      • https://www.facebook.com/callmepappy Michael Pappy Doughty

        This my good sir is NOT a Nerd site!!! It is a site the most gentlemenly Gentlemen……so chive the fuck on!!!!!

        • BruceWayne

          Shut the fuck up replicant.
          Pappy.
          Ass hole.

          • Guest

            You're a douche.

            • BruceWayne

              Fuck you Guest…..Go back to your porn sites.

      • NDChiver

        It might be sexy if she actually knew how to use it. Pull the trigger like that and your gonna have one hell shiner sweetheart.

    • chiveon

      im pretty sure thats Romanian house singer INNA

      • mattheadface

        actually I'm pretty sure that's Australian DJ/model Sarah Robertson
        I submitted a photo of her to the FLBP once, it got posted, then I told her about it and she was chuffed 😀

  • Pacman 922

    2 CHAINZ

    • http://www.facebook.com/langer23 Christopher Lang

      Wanna get my eat on…hibachi

  • Vic

    #22 need a girl that can do that!

    • potato

      to the kitchen!

    • Ned Ryerson

      this isn't the new planking/tebowing/dumb fad is it? i've been seeing quite a few of these pop up..

      • haeddre

        Loving the name… Be careful BFM doesn't punch you…

    • tralfaz

      I feel like she is being chased by a coyote on a rocket.

  • Vic

    #5 is pretty cute…

    • Timmer

      Definatly need moar!

    • time2suffa

      Any female is cute when they swallowing…

  • UDown

    Hukilau

  • http://www.facebook.com/rangerayala Armando Ayala

    #17 owned!
    #5 Sweet Lincoln's mullet

    • Yoga Pants 2012

      Yeah, except he just copied that from the million copies floating around on the net…

  • dashete

    #25 Not if you're an adult with the ability to suspend disbelief.

    • KyleGamgee

      You do what you gotta do to make it happen.

  • jdubs21

    Happy birthday Lena! And for everyone else, girl #5

    • Yoga Pants 2012

      You are now banned from TheChive for 1 week, for thinking you're better than the rest of us.

    • snap

      she makes that cola look delicious.

    • http://twitter.com/NinaAoki @NinaAoki

      Total cokehead.

  • TokyoFace

    #1 …. i wish my math teacher was this awesome

    • jer

      he uses that to protect his virginity

      • TokyoFace

        false. pyramid head attire = lots of trim

        • Underbaker

          But only if it is acute triangle.

    • Yoga Pants 2012

      Im no expert, but Im pretty sure 69 is bigger than 5….

      • Shawn

        That's when they throw in the "not drawn to scale" garbage.

    • Derp

      Pretty sure this was from the movie Silent Hill.

    • https://www.facebook.com/ryan.fox.3745 Ryan Fox

      had to answer it: 67.18630813

    • Dr_Batman

      The lesson gets real awkward when he demonstrates long division by raping some monsters.

  • THX 118

    Not first

    • Magic Mike

      …but still a loser.

    • Ummm

      Nor will you ever be

      • THX 118

        Not first again

  • cookie

    #6 can i butter your toast??

    • Dr_StrangePants

      I always carry around a portable butterchurn.
      It's always attached to me

  • icstars

    323 woah trippy

    • icstars

      meant #23

      • ozioziozioioioioioi

        You shoulda just left it alone mate it was funnier the first time………….323, ha, gold pure gold

  • FKS

    #19 It's so much fun to live in KS that you build a bridge in your back yard to distract you from it.

    • Sorry

      I live in SF the Golden Gate is red.

      • Frank

        Not in spirit.

        • The White Towel

          Actually, it's not red, the technical name for it is International Orange. And that is definitely not even close to a replica of the Golden Gate bridge. Brooklyn bridge maybe.

          • elms

            i'd hope the picture is captioned incorrectly.

            • DrJerom

              Give him a break…He's probably never been to SF. He just thinks the Golden Gate Bridge is actually golden.

    • Si1entStatic

      looks like he has a river or creek splitting his property. Why build a cheap wood bridge when you could go WAY overboard and build that. Kudos to the wife for letting him build it…. my wife would've been like "HELL NO!"

  • bristle palin

    We need a pigtails post Chive…..Do it NOWWW!!!…..Please and Thank you 🙂

    • jdubs21

      I second the motion

    • xfudgenxmeowx

      you should run for president!

    • bristle palin

      Remember when my mom did that…..It was hilarious!

  • Jhc

    Love the content, less freaking ads chive! And save something for the weekend.

    • Jesse

      Read my mind!

    • Cinn

      Great site, but who cares about cat Saturday?

      • 48uj3

        only the most devout chive cock-suckers.

    • DaddyD

      *fewer

  • dashete

    #1 Kurt Hectic became a math teacher?

  • cookie

    #24 you go girl!!!

    • Brian

      Come at me, bitch.

    • Koont

      High Five!….oh wait

    • https://www.facebook.com/wayne.oconnell.5 Wayne O'Connell

      She flies air plains and can be found here: https://www.facebook.com/JCMSofficial (its her "page")

    • JohnWaynefan

      AWESOME!!

  • Rich Mahogany

    $20 on the Ninja Turtle van

  • Bubbles

    #11 How to plant a scope in the eye in 3, 2, 1….

    • Duplicate

      Unless she's using the scope to just LOOK at something. Raising a rifle to your eye doesn't mean it must be fired right then and there.

      I highly doubt someone would say "ya go ahead shoot like that. Let me get my camera out first." If so then she needs new friends lmao

      • Scope Eye

        Thanks for the break down.

      • Karl

        If you're not going to shoot something, it's wildly irresponsible to point a gun at it. Besides, go put a scope right up to your eye and tell me whether you can see better or worse than if the scope is the proper distance from your eye, where it was designed to be.

        • CosmoKramerTheAssMan

          Just accept the fact she's not the sharpest knife in the drawer…and is most likely gonna wear an eye patch. Your very own pirate wife!!

          • KFC

            You had me at "she".

          • luke

            still do it

    • BType13X2

      How to put an eye out using a scope in 3,2,1… ?

  • Dantheloser

    #25 Why exactly? Did you think they filmed it with an actual Hulk?

    • saucypants

      Sort of, yeah.

    • Manicotti

      If they didn't, then why does Robert Downey, Jr. say ON CAMERA, "We have a Hulk"?

      • Idius

        That was the real Tony Stark, actually.

    • Karl

      This is just SHIELD trying to cover up the existence of a real Hulk. Can't pull the wool over my eyes!

    • ATouchofInsanity

      The Hulk is real! Haven't you seen the Hollywood Spotlight featuring him?

  • whosyopapi

    #14 America at it's finest

    • Guse

      What makes you think it's American? White people?

    • Jeff

      Or is it Amercia at its finest?

  • Lisa

    I want #9 and #24 is a bad ass. Seriously. I bet she doesn't take crap from anyone.

    • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

      Yeah, just like Chuck Norris Toilet Paper.

      Hugs,
      Paula
      – Fan testimonial: "Hmmm… I wish chivers would recognize your genious. – Paula's # 1 Fan"

    • BType13X2

      stuff like #9 if executed correctly would take between 2-300 hours for an ornamental welder/ Blacksmith to make but its pretty bad ass.

      • Lisa

        I have a friend who does SCA stuff. He'd lose his freaking mind over this thing. I wonder if it is a forge in and of itself too. Regardless, it's awesome and I want it. I know how to weld…hmmmmm…:)

        • BType13X2

          Welder by trade as well I think if you wanted to build this and you don't have a power hammer/ English wheel your best bet with basic tools would be to make a jig with a slight depression in the middle probably 1/2" cut all the blanks needed for scales put the blanks onto the jig heat them red hot and pound them to get the contour your gonna have alot of time spent being really bored making the scales but this is such a badass little project. And I was wondering the same thing it could very well be an ornamental blacksmiths forge.

  • notawittyname

    #4 Childhood = complete

    • it'sa me... craig

      WHO THE F*** WON?!
      you cant just leave us hanging like that

      • ckron247

        I can actually find out for you… That's my buddy's Mystery Machine out here in Cali!

        • bob_the_cook

          Get on it already! Inquiring minds want, no, NEED to know.

    • BType13X2

      I have a 5er on the Turtle van.

  • Mike Litoris

    #15 "How dare you make hand-party over Pamela!"

    • Bollyver

      Kitty, Y U no like T-bag?

    • Dr_Batman

      Balls nigga!

  • jeff donuts

    Does every one know this "daily morning awesomness"is done after midnight

    I know it's "the morning"but I always thought it was done like at 6am

    • xfudgenxmeowx

      East coast so its 3 am

    • Simon

      Depends where you are. I haven't quite correlated the UK launches yet.

    • captain obvious

      where i live 6am IS after midnight … kinda spooky, huh.

      • Underbaker

        So at noon does it become before midnight?

    • Child please

      Man, Chive is worldwide. Which, by the way, is fucking awesome! They do that so everyone can see on their own morning.

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