A few great pointers to remember when looking for a new job (28 Photos)

Found via Acidcow

  • twavor

    I'm self-employed. Love it, and have for the last 9 years… Neat post, Chive, but in the end, when the shit hits the fan, I can't think of one company out there that wouldn't walk in one day when times get tough and say "Sorry, can't afford to keep paying you all….see ya'!" I don't care how much of a company man anyone is, it don't mean sh*t in the grand scheme of it all. I've never been fired/let go/whatever, but I've seen it happen to some really dedicated employees. I used to be a company man….never again.

    • Guile

      go be a family man, man… jkjk

    • IpointOutTheObvious

      Well, you are a company man. Just your own. As am I.

  • NHale

    The whole idea of asking someone for their weaknesses is an idiotic outdated practice. It's used by interviewers with too little intelligence to be original. It was used in the fifties to try to suss out liberal thinkers who might shake the status quo boat. Basically, it asks, what personal problems do you have at home that are wither going to cause me drama later, or that I can use against you in my bid to either get rid of you later or use you as a step stool to move up in the company.

    If you are an interviewer or HR guy and you honestly ask someone for their weaknesses, you're pathetic and droll.

    • nateb123

      HR people are pathetic by nature. Why the fuck would you want to be in HR? It's the department of lost souls.

  • Go Hoosiers

    Helpful. And some of you guys are assholes, The Chive put this up to help, don't be assholes and destroy the whole thing. WTF have you done for the Chive? Probably not near as much as it has done for you, ungrateful dicks!

  • Jdos776

    thanks chive I've got an interview today and will defiantly remember whats in this post and to KCCO

  • https://www.facebook.com/kmills.designservices Kevin Mills

    I'm wondering if you should put your facebook, and other soc. net. profile addresses on your resume, or is that akin to printing it out on colored paper? also, you should probably hide the fact that you have "liked" the chive or any other, um. let's call them work debilitating sites. AHH gotta go, boss is coming!

  • Samhedi

    Ahh, you silly people who worry about this crap, you make me laugh.Thank goodness you exist though, I need people out there to do all the trivial stuff I don't want to.

    • MrHat

      Trivial stuff as in real jobs, Mr. Minimum Wage?

      • Samhedi

        Nice try MrHAt, I'm sure it makes you feel better to think so, but I haven't made minimum wage since high school. Being a self-employed artist and musician, I set my own wage. If I work hard, I make more, if I slack, I make less. If I produce crap, people don't buy it, so it is good incentive to produce good work.

      • Samhedi

        I do, however, employ several people, and none of them make minimum wage.

        • MrHat

          So.. Considering I've never heard any of your music or seen any of your art, what you're saying is that thank goodness there are people who actually contribute to society?

          • Samhedi

            How would you know? Some of the highest earning songwriters are complete unknowns, and they like it that way. All you need to do is pen two or three hit songs and the royalties will put you into the six figures a year bracket for life. I'm not there yet, but I do alright for myself.

            Look man, I'm sorry you have to be a wage slave, but learn to follow your heart and take a few risks and you can get out of it. I worked retail management for years, admittedly in an industry I love (music), but still wage slavery. I took a risk, and now I make more than ever, and can employ my friends at a decent wage. Diversify, push through failure, never compromise, and you will make it.

            • BTI

              Damn hippies

  • TylerDurdenUMD

    I've already said on more than one instance that if I move up to management level and HR bitches about not getting a thank-you card/email, they'd be the ones needing this link.

    "Human Resources: Even God answers to us"

  • Banana_man

    Also, and maybe some HR people can help with this, apparently, when applying for a job, DON'T attach a picture of yourself to the resume. It's just a bad idea.

  • nitrox


  • Kyle

    Re: #26 Am I supposed to actually tell my potential boss I essentially want his/her job in a year or is that supposed to be an inner goal? I can't imagine if would go over too well.

  • jeff donuts

    nice try but im not on social networks my self esteem is just fine

  • Dude Imbibes

    "Where do you see yourself in 5 years Peter?"
    dontsaydoingyourwife dontsaydoingyourwife dontsaydoingyourwife
    "Doing your….son?"

    • nuccabay

      YES!!! you win the posts sir

  • nuccabay

    its pretty spot on…unless of course you get my boss who asks you the best place to get a beer afterwards in East Lansing is and talks MSU football the rest of the time haha

  • Wannabang

    I am a sophomore in college, and am starting to look for internships. I am a great student (in the honors program), interesting, and funny (and humble, too 😉 ), but I have always sucked at interviews. Thanks Chive for these tips. That's why I love this site – it's more than T & A and lolcats.

    • joe shabadoo

      "and humble, too"

      haha yea ok

      • Wannabang

        I hope you got the sarcasm

  • joe shabadoo

    this is a great post. It wouldn't hurt to have content like this more often.

  • PHARIS88

    #2 Hold on one second, *answers phone* "Hello?" … "I got the job? What are you willing to pay?" … "Ok, perfect! See you later!" *hangs up phone* "Sorry, I just got a job offer! 4th one today! So what can you offer me? What's the pay and the benefits?" haha

  • tino grad

    though some was tongue 'n cheek, much of it was still quite true!! Thanks

  • http://www.facebook.com/joeltodd Joel Todd

    First few were funny then eh, TLDR.

  • testing

    man all of these interview questions just make me want to kill myself. I remember doing interview after interview of the same shit and I had memorized answers (all completely made up) to those questions and I seriously just once wanted somebody to ask me a single question that allowed me to speak honestly about why I would be a good candidate.

  • Alan

    So-tell-me-about-yourself, Whats-your-greatest-strength, Whats-your-greatest-weakness all mean THEY don't give a shit, about you or the position. Chances are good the manager is going to hire a FOAF and is staging interviews to comply with EOE regulations.

    Knock Em Dead: good book on handling (weird) interview questions.

  • tfritzy08

    mostly common sense, but bookmarked it

  • http://thechive.com/ bkfrijoles

    this is some good shit

  • ExplodingHeadz

    I'll be honest, some of the items on this list never even crossed my mind to do. Which probably explained why I didn't get any call-backs.
    After following these points I got a job interview on Friday with a final decision on Monday at the latest.

  • AWBguy

    alright, now i'm ready to apply to the chive!

  • nateb123

    This is mostly true but you do have to realize this was written by someone in HR. If you have actually got a position in HR and don't want to shoot yourself, you're probably a bit of a mouth breather. All HR people want is for you to make their job as easy as possible. Fuck em. Go over their heads to the hiring manager or the head of the company if you're so good. And if you aren't sure if you're good enough to do that, you aren't and should pick another line of work.

    Also, regarding "thank you emails" cut that shit out, it makes you look like a desperate pussy. If you give all the right answers and look desperate, you aren't gonna get anywhere.

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