Daily Afternoon Randomness (49 Photos)

124 5
124 5
  • Mark


    Great smile. Thanks for your service you badass Chivette you.

    • between3and20chrs


    • OhioChiver

      Well done Chivette and thank you as well! Well done Mark for posting a respectable top post too!

    • http://www.facebook.com/battlestarcomics Battlestarcomics

      #3 USA women kick fucking ass any size.

    • http://www.magnoliaplantation.com/events/wedding_giveaway.html IowaChiver

      Those two are both in my old unit in the 82nd! They're finalists in a $50K weddign giveaway at the Magnolia Plantation in Charleston, SC. Go vote for them!! http://www.magnoliaplantation.com/events/wedding_

    • http://www.magnoliaplantation.com/events/wedding_giveaway.html IowaChiver

      Those two are both in my old unit at the 82nd Airborne! They're finalists in a $50K wedding giveaway. Please go vote for them to win a dream wedding when they get back to America!! http://www.magnoliaplantation.com/events/wedding_

      • Guest_of_Honor

        Should post that link on the front page and get them their wedding.

  • Someguy

    Great DAR!

    • http://www.facebook.com/shannon.coverdale.3 Shannon Coverdale

      Now MOAR

  • Don't get married

    Someday I want to come home to my wife working out like this, only the #20 version, not the KFC snarfing piggy I come home to now.

    • Garret

      I will laugh at this until I go to sleep tonight, you sir are my favorite person today.

    • its_forge

      I had a Mrs. that looked more or less like this, without the possibly fake boobies though, but she was fucking crazy and thought the money to pay credit card bills just magically appeared out of my ass. I got rid of her and got an equally beautiful woman who *doesn't* have a teeny waist or a flat belly but who the hell cares, she's hot and she's not fucking crazy.

      • TheDarkKnight

        Cool story bro

        • http://twitter.com/JJrrake @JJrrake

          Hahahahhaha yea stu, that is cool

          • Leslie Chow

            Who thumbed this down? Great Hangover reference-

            • http://twitter.com/JJrrake @JJrrake

              They thumbsdown the j rake just to hate on my superiority

              • http://twitter.com/McBeastie666 @McBeastie666

                we thumb you down because we hate you. simple as that.

                • CaptMike

                  hate is a strong enough word for the j rake…

                  • CaptMike


    • Kevin

      I could not agree more DGM! Preach on brother! I will also laugh until I go to sleep tonight…

    • Might Get Married

      My girlfriend asked me the question the other day "Would you still be with me if I was fat?" My answer. "Did I meet you when you were fat?" Her response "Good fucking answer". I may have a keeper.

      • echodts

        I think your right

        • Guest

          No, I think your left

    • DontListentoACynic

      Get a divorce, bro and don't bitch about your wife like that. Chances are she eats that way because she's just as unhappy with you.

    • Cecil

      And what, you're such a damned prize? No doubt underemployed, small cocked, half limp and fat as shit.
      Why would she put forth the effort to look hot for someone who acts like you dude?

      • Don't Get Married

        Who ya callin' underemployed?

        • http://twitter.com/JJrrake @JJrrake

          Is cecil a guy commenting on dick size?


          • Todd

            Ya Cecil you twit!

      • Mr.M

        This here statement feels too personal to be about " dont get married " The vehement argument had to come from a deeper reality than someone moaning over the internet. I am venturing a guess that Cecil is suspecting her partner of secretly hating her over the few 10s of KGs ( or some other reasons for self doubt) that she gained and reacts accordingly … spiting hate back, act of which she is incapable in real life because standing up to people and facing real problems requires inner strength and will.

    • Harry

      Dude, maybe you need to be out of your marriage if thats what you think of your wife!

    • Guz

      I feel your pain mate! Didn't stop me laughing at 'KFC snarfing piggy' Though!

    • http://twitter.com/RndmThtz @RndmThtz

      So you're the "prize" in the relationship?

    • I's votes

      Man, I vote this comment of the day, pretty funny.

      • http://twitter.com/JJrrake @JJrrake

        Agreed yo thats funny as fuck. All u haters are a bunch of gentleman pussies

        • Gentleman

          Being a gentleman doesn't make you a pussy. Being a gentleman gets you pussy! Just sayin'…

          But the original comment was pretty funny nonetheless.

          • Zuke

            Meh, being assertive and confident generally gets you pussy.

            Being a gentleman is certainly a good thing to do, but there would be a whole lot less dudes depressingly stuck in the friend zone if being a gentleman got you pussy.

            I'm just sayin' as well…

    • Pr0n

      Wow. With an attitude like that I'm surprised you're even married at all. What a fucking ass hat. Do her a favor and stop wasting her time being married to someone who secretly hates her.

      And don't say "meh it's for the kids" or some stupid bullshit like that unless you want to teach your children that it's appropriate to live a terribly miserable existence as a god awful human being who hates the one he promised he'd love.

      //Your comment is a disgusting example of a miserable human being causing their own misery and blaming it on other.s

      • Heres_Johnny30

        I don't think he promised to marry a "KFC snarfing piggy", but I wasn't there nor have I seen it on youtube.

        • tralfaz

          I think that's the worse part of for better or for worse.

        • Chella

          I'm sure he's a real fuckin prize too. I'm sure he doesn't have a beer gut, or thinning hair, or a rug on his back. And you know what? I bet his shit smells like roses too! I'm actually pretty disappointed in the Chivers for all the thumbs up on this dick wad.

      • Don't Get Married

        Obviously, you're not married :)

        • Pr0n

          False, Happily Married and not wasting each others lives away being hated.

          • Cecil


          • Zuke

            An even better question would be if you're married, how long have you been married for? Because I know plenty of people who swear they're the happiest motherfuckers on earth for, eh, 2-6 years. Then the story starts changing. Next thing you know all they talk about is how much they hate the things their partners do.

            If you've been married for, say, 20+ years and can say you're you're both completely happy and satisfied, then I would give you mad props judging by the state of marriage dissatisfaction/divorce these days (I'd also wonder why you use the name "pron" as a person in their mid 30s or older, but regardless). Almost everyone is happy when they first get married, or most people (notice I said 'most') wouldn't be getting married in the first place. It usually takes a few years for it all to start breaking down.

            I completely disagree that you should just forget about the kids' though; it makes me wonder if you've even reached the point in marriage where you've considered having kids, because I think most people who have realize just going "Oh, I'm unhappy; forget about how the kids feel, time to split!" isn't a good way to go about things.

            Anyways, I get this feeling like there's no way in hell you've been married for more than a few years at absolute max. Like, I'd seriously legitimately be really, really, *REALLY* intensely shocked. Shit, I'm a kid (well, I'm legally an adult, but I sure don't feel like one) who hasn't ever even been close to getting married, ever, and I still recognize how easy and common it is for married couples to slip into the sort of situation the OP stated. Only someone in the initial, delusional throes of marriage would act like it's unheard of for someone to feel like he does, because his sentiment is by no means uncommon by any stretch of the imagination.

            You probably think you're special and that you and your partner will be together forever; almost everyone thinks that when they first get married. Why do you think people get tattoos of their partners name on them? Do you think they thought they'd look like a complete idiot when their marriage ended in bitter divorce a few years later? In a number of years when you hate your spouses guts and they've grown complacent, out of shape and unattractive, all of which stands a real good chance of happening, make sure to remember exactly what you said here. I know you probably won't, because usually people who throw stones like you appear to don't remember the hypocritical things they say or else they wouldn't be so judgmental about others' feelings to begin with, but try at least.

            • WhiteOrBlack

              now, who actually read all of this?

          • Dr_Fap

            I call bullshit. You are obviously a 12 year old that comes from a broken home.

      • http://www.facebook.com/brenton.platner Brenton TopGun Platner

        Shakeweight gif would be dope!

        • https://www.facebook.com/clinton.j.kelley Clinton James Kelley


    • Ferngully

      Classy!!! But I have to agree. I just told my wife that this is her new workout outfit going forward. She agreed once the kids school starts. I can't wait until August 27th to see those 32D's bounce!!!!

      Keeping Calm until then…

    • tankasshater

      "KFC Snarfing Piggy"…just found my new fantasy football team name, thanks

    • Axy

      How disrespectful to your wife. Do you also say such things to her face? I hope she reads this and leaves your ass.

    • the franchise

      hahaha this is just too funny. "KFC Snarfing Piggy" lol!

      ^ and whats even more funny is the strangers who feel its their responsibility to scold you and offer marriage counseling

    • Guest54

      You're an asshole.

  • HOOK

    #5 #20 Absolute perfection. Need MOAR!!

    • Col Sanders

      Aaaaaannnd you're what? The Soloflex guy?

    • Lululemon

      And may God bless 'Boy shorts'…..

    • McChiver

      Definitely need to repost in the next "Fit Girls", so we can see them again! :D

    • Guest

      You could bounce quarters off 20's butt (and would enjoy doing so).

      Not sure about 5's age though (no doubting the body). Looks pretty close to the line,

    • Tomas

      #20 Yes YES!

  • BSmike

    Time for another Things That Bounce GIF post?? #31

    • Medieval

      Chloe Lamb?

      • Quailman


    • r2xj

      holy smokes! find find find find find!

      • Huy209

        Cailin Mendes. Your welcome.

    • PrimerGray

      Long overdue

  • Josh

    #44 I would be 100% supportive of theCHIVE crew posting a few more pics of you. You are beautiful!

    • smokey


    • Trav1121

      Canada grows em right! Just another great example!

      • Guest

        I don't think Canada grew those. Maybe Dr. Canada planted them, but they ain't home grown.

    • hi mom


    • Meh

      I prefer real ones…

      • Barry McKokkinner

        agreed but I bet they are really fun to play with.

    • mosby

      Absolutely gorgeous!!!!!

    • Perkins Maxwell

      more silicon in that pic than in my computer

  • kelowna chivette

    love the chive!!!!

    • http://thechive.com GordoZX

      Are you going to submit so we can see the Kelowna Chivette ??

      • Absolute Creep


  • gettinIT

    #49 wow. 10

    • http://www.facebook.com/james.keogh.733 James Keogh

      Saw that pic and just thought "fuck"

      • Puffy

        She can do a split on my dick if you know what I mean

        • JSF

          What do you mean?

          • H.R.T

            …….. That she could do the splits on his dick while she was fucking him I think.

            • Frank

              Go on…

    • jonb

      she is perfect!!!

    • Josh


  • Becky


    That moment when the chive is so big John has to address entire cities.

    • Guz

      Good timing! Which bars in Boston are chiveworthy? Planning a trip in a few weeks.

      • http://twitter.com/JJrrake @JJrrake

        Ill see ya again… This side or the othaaa

      • Shiftycap1

        Bell In Hand Tavern. A Must.

    • _LG

      Haha! So true!

      I'm just ecstatic that the Chive coming to Boston is an actual reality!!! So stoked!

      • Smudge

        No you're not Boston blows

        • KCO617

          Your mom blows. ZING.

      • http://twitter.com/JJrrake @JJrrake

        Who the fuck do you think you are? You're gonna let me or not let me do shit. Here's a little fucking cheat sheet for you. Its never gonna be me and you and your sister and Shyne playing house up there. You got it? Get that in your fucking head!

    • http://twitter.com/LosTorre @LosTorre


    • Guest

      Go to Boston when the Mayor remembers that the Bill of Rights protects Freedom of Speech; not until. Meanwhile, the owner of Chick Fil A has as much right to his opinion as every other person in this country Keep Calm and Chive on my brothers and sisters!

      • Taylor

        No one said he couldn't say what he wanted he can, but I think as Louis C.K. put it best " Two guys cant be happy because you can't sit your stupid kid down and explain to them about being gay? It's your fucking decision to have a stupid kid you deal with it." Bostonians stick together and if someone doesn't want to support one of us then we have no room for their franchise in our city.

      • http://twitter.com/JJrrake @JJrrake

        I waited nine years in Walpole for you Motherfucker, just nine years that's all.

    • http://twitter.com/JJrrake @JJrrake

      Im puttin this whole fuckin town in my rearview

      • http://twitter.com/JJrrake @JJrrake

        Anyone else think the town is hillarious

        • HOSSYMOTO

          That movie was FUCKING GREAT. Hey Furgie remember who clipped your nuts.

    • Ouch!

      Seattle would still be a better idea though.

      • http://twitter.com/DrDrai1122 @DrDrai1122

        THE PNW baby!!! TheChive would rock the 206!!

        • Ouch!

          Rock it like a goddamn high school kegger!

    • HatBomb

      Next up, Norway, we read all your emails for a meetup. I can't say when, but we are working on it.

    • Thunderhorse

      about time Boston had a meet up

      • http://twitter.com/JJrrake @JJrrake

        What r u a fuckin triggerman now?

    • OhioChiver

      Hmmm. If we sent a Chive t-shirt to every Congressman….hell, we could fix this whole country in a week!

      • Vote Shmote

        Congress: representing idiocy with idiocy.

      • http://twitter.com/DrDrai1122 @DrDrai1122

        thanks for the totally unrelated and non sensical comment. We really wouldn't expect anything more from someone out of Ohio though…..

        • http://twitter.com/McBeastie666 @McBeastie666

          please don't use the word "we" as if you talk for the rest of us.

    • http://www.cupcakesbymartha.com MarthaJeane

      So damn excited!!

      • https://www.facebook.com/josh.arrington Josh 'Ua Arrington

        YES! It's happening!!

    • http://www.facebook.com/tony.dagostino2 Tony Dagostino

      Wicked fukin stoked, Got the pats playing tonight now i see that the Chive is Coming to BOSTON!!!!!! Great Fuckin day

  • CLTChiver

    #1 Merica baby!

    • rikooprate

      "These colors don't run!!!"

    • Mel_Gibson


      • Underbaker

        If you look closely you can spot an elf on the far left.

  • Roose1134

    #20 #49 yes, more please

  • Off Da Wall

    #5 #20 #34

    MOAR Please! Great shots!

    • SeriouslyWTF

      #34 didn't even write that shit on her picture. WTF Chive, knock that shit off.

  • Senior

    I hear my guys cheering upstairs. I'm sure it's regarding #18

    • http://www.youtube.com/user/ADHDavenger13?feature=mhsn Firefighter23

      Fuck. Are you serious?! I have Firefighter Fit Thursday at 3 Eastern! Fuck.

      • dagg nabbit

        great. nobody gives a shit, thank you

    • Phoneboy

      I just hope that some of us that are actual firefighters are able to order these, and not just people that want a chive shirt.

      Chive dudes: Can we order early if we provide some proof? :-)

      • RICEaRONI1024

        Seriously! Hook it up chive gods! I got my I.D. Ready, I'll be waiting to hear from y'all! Ha thanks!

      • Zchacon

        Definitely! Hook it up for anyone with a badge, John. I've been saying you should make these for a year now and these are gonna go QUICK.
        I NEED that shirt!

      • dagg nabbit

        i think you are feeling yourself too much, boy

      • dagg nabbit

        maybe your proof can be can be the video tape footage from the grocery store, cause that's all you guys do, go to the grocery store and pose. Shit, you guys couldn't do a cop's job for 1 day. Not enough down time….or not enough time with a grip of men like you have at the firehouse…

    • https://www.facebook.com/lyle.lance Lyle Lance

      #17 and #18 – I can't wait to get one of these! Alarm clock is set!

    • dagg nabbit

      firefighters are arrogant unless they are carrying that stupid boot around, asking for money

      • http://www.facebook.com/enginefive.truckthree EngineFive TruckThree

        Keep Calm and Chive on just chive on…………………………………………………..

        • dagg nabbit

          dude, your lame…can't u say anything original?

        • dag nabbit

          keep calm and blow me in your firetruck ;b

    • dagg nabbit

      is being white a requirement with these guys?

      • Derby

        No. Just ready to work yer ass off.
        What are you up to?

        • dag nabbit

          tagging your mom

          • dag nabbit


      • patov40

        dagg nabbit, Keeping Calm and Chiving On while waiting for the first "Shoe Shiners" KCCO shirt. B)

        • dag nabbit

          you been away a long time patov, maybe they didnt tell you up there, i dont shine shoes no more

          • patov40

            dag nabbit, in case you haven't realized, everyone here hates you. Trolls = lowest form of life. Keep Calm, Chive On, and go get your shine box! B-)

    • http://www.facebook.com/J.Casiano7 Jeramie Casiano

      Sitting and waiting for mine….

    • BigglesWorth

      Firefighters are a bunch of leaech fucks.

    • bangerang

      Chive On! from a fellow Wayne chiver

  • Yeah

    #12 Your face. I like that shit.

    • http://www.facebook.com/slosr20 Edgar Alexander Munguia

      Her eye's got me hypnotized, and them gauges OH I love them, y'all some haters…B)

    • http://twitter.com/DrDrai1122 @DrDrai1122

      What a panty dropper of a pick up line you got there,

      • Derby

        Yes….how eloquent.

    • Whoopi_G

      I like her face too, but those ears are fucking disgusting.

      • CaptMike

        She has a gauge in her vag too, gross

    • YOYO


      • http://www.facebook.com/shannon.coverdale.3 Shannon Coverdale

        Those eyes

    • Big_James

      That ring is totally steam punk and bad ass. Can we see you in your steam punk gear?

    • PhayzR

      Absolutely breathtaking! I doubt you (the girl in this pic) will ever read these comments, and im sure theres no need to mention it, but ignore the douchebags bashing your gauges. You know those guys are gonna end up with an infested slut they met at a club and banged in the bathroom, and probably end up being abusive drunken fathers (hopefully not though).

      You are beyond gorgeous, and your choice of jewelry does an exquisite job of framing such an incredible face. KCCO and dont let the stubborn, shallow, materialistic douchebags get to you. You are beautiful beyond words.

      • Batwing

        Materialistic would be the twat in the picture that needs to stretch out her ears to get noticed. Suck on that you emo bitch.

      • Liv


  • https://www.facebook.com/Meatboxx Ryan C Olson

    #1 GO SANTA!

    • Kayci

      Exactly what I said when I saw this!

      • manowarz

        Me too!

  • zoxymusic


    • phil

      looks so much like emily resig…

      • Agree

        That's what I thought too!

    • http://www.facebook.com/shannon.coverdale.3 Shannon Coverdale

      Need to be a shake weight

  • acupofjoe

    Is #37 even legal?

    • $am

      Olympic, USAV and the FIVB (the international rules) and women's college all allow the contact with any part of the body including intentionally kicking the ball. Chive On!

    • Ryan

      Fucking Brazilians.

      • acupofjoe

        The more you know! Chive on!

    • Guz

      Yep, any part of your body apparently.

    • Dr_StrangePants

      With all the effort it takes
      you'd be heartless to disqualify it

    • Gonasiphaherpalitis


      • Fact

        Thought it was "gonasyphaherpalaids"?

        • James

          It's Gonnaherpesyphilaids….get it right!

    • Rupert Pupkin

      Keep going and hope no one notices = totally legit.

    • Karl

      But, but HOW DID IT PLAY OUT?

      • Bazza

        The won the point. Pretty sure you can just google and find it

    • Ekim

      I don't know how many volleyball fans there are here but that is as sick a play as you will see in volleyball. She definitely KCCO. Plus, she's hot.

  • Tommy

    #44 #49 Wowzers! And #27 is staged…

    • Ian

      Or more likely shopped

    • WhiteOrBlack

      Yeah, he should be bouncing a basketball.

      • Eric

        On your chin, along with your dads balls…

    • Bavic

      why is it staged, becuase you dont like the guy?

      • BillSPreston

        Right, because it's much more likely that the president lets a random photographer into the oval office and allows him to take a candid picture of him when he just so happens to be answering the phone while holding a baseball bat that makes him appear in a positive light to the general public. Said photographer then subsequently is allowed to upload these photos to the internet without any screening by the white house because they trust that no breech of security occurred. You're right, seems legit to me.

        • bobsuruncle

          The president has a full-time photographer, and it's a pretty prestigious gig to get as a photographer. This guy is Pete Souza, who was also Reagan's photographer.


          • BillSPreston

            So you pretty much confirmed that the photo is staged then.

      • some-dude

        because he's probably never sitting at that desk ;)

        Seriously though. Who can sit on a chair with wheels in front of a desk with a floor like that? Wouldn't the chair just keep rolling away?

        • Guest

          You don't sit much, do you?

      • Willy T McRibb

        Yep, should have been a golf club, for accuracy sake.
        Baseball is Americas game and you know "homy don't play dat"

    • http://wilhelmscream.net Rex Hondo

      So is virtually every picture of every president ever. What's your point?

      • Eric

        Shop' my balls cunt

  • Kobie

    Staggering elegance #38.

  • Uncle Jesse

    #20 There's toned and then there's this girl. Shake my weight anytime darlin'

    PS That's me diving in the mud in #1 yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee haaaaaawwwwwww

    • http://twitter.com/JJrrake @JJrrake

      Its gonna be a long day for uncle jesse!

  • https://www.facebook.com/hustla.275 Michel Payette

    #12 Extreme beauty….but the cock-ring in ur ear has got to go.

    • its_forge

      I'm not sure that's a "gauge" ear thing, I think it's possibly a regular earring that's just a big dark disc with an ordinary teeny little post behind it.

    • Trav1121

      They aren't that bad but when our generation, with all the tats and stuff like stretched earlobes, gets to the old folk's home age… It is gonna look FUCKED UP! Haha It looks cool now but on droopy skin… *shivers*

    • WhiteOrBlack

      Small cock ya got there huh?

    • Whoopi_G

      Seriously. You fucked up your gorgeous face with those.

    • Lowercase McGee

      Missed that during my scroll… I am disappoint

    • keystone183

      Seriously. Every time i see some clown with one of those (or two) i think, "wow, here we have a complete loser." Why do you have to be so stupid.

      • kurtisg

        who the fuck are you to judge, you couldnt get with that girl in a million years, so whos the loser?

        • Guest

          you are, idiot….COMPLETE LOSER

      • PhayzR

        Wow, it says a lot about your character to have such a strong opinion based solely on someone's choice of appearance. Way to be a winner at life, bro. (You have no clue what it means to Keep Calm and Chive On)

    • https://www.facebook.com/david.s.whaley Seth Whaley

      she mine as well leave them in because there is no hope for her ears now short of plastic surgery…

    • arthur

      you know we can see you right michael… you're balding, and you have bitch tits, probably should just keep your judgements to yourself

  • I_am_golf_c0m

    #27 someone come help me kill this spider

    • Owen Smithers

      LOL…as he's working feverishly to dismantle our nuclear 'big stick'. Guess the bat will have to do….

      • its_forge

        ::snerk:: 'Cuz having 5,000 times more nuclear force than you need to crack the planet into crumbs instead of having 90,000 times more is really, really bad, see. You one 'a them "fiscal conservatives?" You know how much money we spend each year maintaining a nuclear arsenal we will absolutely never, ever use in a world where we don't have any real enemies to speak of? You know how many more sweetass tax breaks we could give to Paul Ryan and Mitt Romney if we didn't spend that money maintaining a bunch of stupid nuclear missiles? It'd be EPIC.

        • Owen Smithers

          Checking my copy of the Constitution, I see that the federal government is empowered with providing for the national defense, and so it is a legitimate, legal, use of tax revenues, but yes, we could certainly discuss the threats and the number of nukes required.
          Regarding tax breaks, that's what's known as people to keep more of the money they earn, rather than have it taken, under threat of prison by the government. People, including Romney and Ryan, and you and me, are under no obligation to pay more in taxes than is required by the law. Let's address the ridiculousness that is our HUGE tax code.

          • its_forge

            Let's address the fact that this stupid fucking "trickle-down" principle has *not ever worked* and that morons on the Right thinking that maybe, just maybe, if we give rich people just ONE MORE massive tax break to the point where the only next step is for US to pay THEM, maybe then, MAYBE !!!! THEN !!!! they'll start "trickling" some of the money on us instead of y'know, sticking it in offshore tax-free bank accounts and investments where it literally robs STILL MORE revenue from the Treasury. Shit, let's skip the middle man, let's just fucking sign the entire treasury over to those 400 billionaires and we'll just fucking DIE. How's that sound? Does that sound like a fucking plan??!!!

            • Owen Smithers

              People who earn a lot of money don't generally hoard it under their mattresses. They invest it in new businesses (hiring people – who get paid – trickle, trickle), or in equipment (which must be built by people who get paid – trickle, trickle), or in expanding their current businesses (by buying new equipment and buildings and/or hiring people – trickle, trickle), or they buy themselves houses and cars and boats and appliances and toys, all of which must be built by people who get paid (trickle, trickle), so I'm not so sure that "trickle-down" has not ever worked. It works every day in millions of big and small transactions by people FREELY choosing to decide how and when they want to spend the fruits of their labor.
              I would have you remember that the entire treasury consists of the profits of the labor of people. IT DOES NOT BELONG TO THE GOVERNMENT FIRST! It belongs to the people who created the value by their labor and earned it first!
              You don't exist by the grace and mercy of the government, it exists by the will of the people. How about we skip the middle man of gov't and we all just keep more of what we earn and then spend it as we freely choose to?

              • its_forge

                **It doesn't trickle down, that's a MYTH that they've been feeding you since Saint Ronnie first spewed that load of bullshit over 30 years ago.** It's completely and one hundred percent provably utter crap and nonsense. Billionaires and corporations are sitting on more money, especially as I said in tax-free offshore accounts. *This is not a matter of opinion, this is an indisputable fact." It's very, very clear that "let people keep their money" doesn't work for SHIT. People. Are. Greedy. As. FUCK. Saying "taxes should be voluntary" or whatever it is you're trying to suggest is fucking INSANE. You want to do business, you want infrastructure, you want interstate highways, roads, rails, shipping ports, canals, harbors, a Coast Guard to keep pirates from raiding your ships? You want cops, firemen, highway patrol to keep the assholes off the roads so your trucks will get there on time? You want to do business in the United States without having to pay for all this shit out of your own pocket? Then PAY YOUR FUCKING TAXES. Because since everybody else is also doing their civic duty as Americans and paying their fucking taxes too, all that shit doesn't cost YOU hardly any money at all. But pay your fair share, shit! Me paying 1/4 of what I get and you Mr. Industrialist not only paying *nothing* but getting 4, 5, 10 billion in government subsidies ***and then you boast to Wall Street that you made 40 billion in profits last quarter and your CEO is going to make another 100 million in bonuses. Meanwhile I'm lookin' at my $800 a week, the most I've ever earned in my life, and saying FUCK. YOU.

                • Owen Smithers

                  You saying it's a myth doesn't make it one. I see people every day buying and selling things and working and creating wealth. And they spend that wealth, and yes, they are greedy and spend it on things that they want. And that's the difference – they are making the choice. Not government. Their money trickles to other people in exchange for things of value, and both sides of the deal are willing and participants.
                  I'm not opposed to taxes, but I am concerned that they be spent on Constitutional things.
                  Regarding these tax free off-shore accounts, so what if those who earn it choose to take that money out of the system so they can legally avoid having it taken by government? That money wasn't stolen from you or me. It wasn't confiscated at the point of a gun. It belongs to that person. It is theirs to do with what they please and what is legal.
                  Did you know that half of the wage earners in this country already pay NO federal income taxes and/or actually are paid by the federal government? How long do you expect people to keep working their ass off (including yourself) to pay for all the things that government does AND pay people?
                  Look, do you really just want to be a looter and take what is not yours, or do you want to have the dignity of working and earning what is yours while living in an environment where you can succeed or fail based on your own merits? Or is it better and more sustainable to just vote for corrupt politicians punishing the successful and taking what they've created and earned by force?

                  • its_forge


                    That's Alan Greenspan — notably, not some Commie Socialist hippie collectivist nutball, but **Ayn Rand's boyfriend** talking — saying your "trickle" theory **failed.** If you give me $1000 and tell me I have the option of sharing some of it with people and that will make their lives better but I don't have to do it if I don't want to, you know what? I'm gonna keep that money. And that is exactly what all those rich a-holes have been doing since this bullshit "theory" began.

                    Y'know what works? Is a republic telling people yo, if you want to set up shop and do business in our republic, you're going to have to pay your fair share. And then charging those businesses *a fair share.* Certainly not anywhere near enough that it's just not worth it to DO business in that republic, but enough that the republic benefits from the company's presence and here's the kicker, **is able to provide services as recompense for the taxes paid.** You know, like bus and train services and public roads so employees will be able to get to work. Cops and firemen and emergency medical so you and your employees won't have to worry if something happens. You know, stuff civilized people like to have, instead of "oh you can't afford that? well tough fucking shit, I got mine." That ain't no way to do business and if that's your attitude you can certainly skip right the fuck outta MY republic Buster.

                    Looting, merits, those are dogwhistle words for people who don't want to pay taxes and want others to suck it up and deal with it or starve and die. Fuck that, that's not a world I want to live in. Why. Do. You.

                    • Owen Smithers

                      Really? So, if I put a gun to the head of your rich neighbor and took $1000 from him and gave it to you, you would put that money in your sock drawer and never spend it on anything? And you think that's a better use of that money, that wasn't yours in the first place?
                      You need to realize that the rich guy who invests in a business isn't doing it because he has "the option of sharing some of it with people", he does it to make a profit for himself. The wonderful off-shoot of that, if it's a successful venture, is that that investment creates new things and new wealth and the people he hires add value and receive compensation for that. They EARN what they get. It isn't stolen from someone else.
                      You need to understand the basic principles involved in that first before we can go into this 'fair share' stuff with roads and firemen and all that. I've already pointed out that about half of the wage earners in this country pay no federal income taxes. Are they paying their 'fair share'? And how much, exactly would be fair to take from the rich. Of course they should contribute, and you might even could argue they should pay a higher percentage, but how much do you think you can take before they say, 'Fuck it! I'm not killing myself to keep 50 or 30 or 10%. I'm going on the dole and let some other poor sucker pay for everything and do everything!" It's not sustainable. And it's just wrong.
                      I pay the fuck out of taxes. At every level. And I pay for health insurance. I pay for my own groceries, and my own kid's lunch, and my own electric bill, and my own house payment. And, that's not enough that I take care of myself and pay taxes to pay for roads and bridges and all that other stuff, but now I'm expected to pay for everyone elses' stuff through higher taxes so the gov't can skim even more value off of every dollar I work my ass off to EARN?!? Yeah, I think looting and merits are pretty relevant to this discussion. And you know what else, I'm damn glad there was a ballsy fuck who decided to take the risk to start a small business way back when that grew enough to hire me so I could earn my own living. Thank you, (now) rich owner guy! Good job! I'm not gonna vote for gov't to take more and more from you so you just decide to bug out and shut the doors. I'm gonna work to learn and grow so that someday, if gov't will get the fuck out of the way, I can buy the business from you and continue the American Dream!

                    • its_forge

                      Ugh, I give up. I'm gonna drop a few heavy beats here and just go, because clearly you're trying to "win" this conversation by flooding it with ridiculous meaningless bullshit.

                      1. Who the fuck said anything about taking my theoretical $1000 from someone by force? What I said *and evidence backs me up* is that giving tax breaks to rich people does not cause the "surplus" to "trickle down." Because rich people, you see, already have more money than they can spend. So they're just gonna take that extra cash you're giving them by not charging them taxes, and they're gonna stick it in an account that the IRS can't get at, and it's just gonna sit there doing NOTHING. Not helping anything. NOTHING.

                      2. Half the people getting paid to do work don't pay taxes on their income because they don't make enough money to pay taxes, but as you yourself pointed out, thank you very much, income tax isn't the only tax. And people below the poverty level have to give a much, much higher percentage of their pay to things like property tax, municipal taxes, sales tax, so on.

                      3. No one ever, ever said "Fuck it I'm sick of paying taxes I'm going to quit my job making hundreds of thousands a year and live on welfare." That's fucking insane. If you'd ever lived on welfare for even a month you'd realize how much it fucking sucks and that no one in the world would fucking do that.

                      4. What the hell do you mean "higher taxes?" Nobody's raising your taxes. Obama has *lowered* taxes for *everybody.* He wants to end the Bush tax cuts for people making over $250K, which means those people will pay a **crippling** THREE PERCENT MORE on any income over that $250K. OMG three percent OMGOMG. I'm makin' a quarter mil a year I ain't givin' a FUCK about $7000.

                      5. Upward mobility in America is a myth. In the United States since about the end of the 1960s, clock punchers have stayed clock punchers and their wages have remained flat, and the rich have stayed rich and become richer exponentially and they don't want to share their goodies with any more people. Yeah you hear success stories but those are one or two people out of hundreds of millions. You and I both will keep doing our best and earning our wage and patriotically paying our taxes but neither one of us is ever going to own much more than we've got right now. http://www.nationofchange.org/republicans-and-myt

                    • its_forge

                      Also noted: you not acknowledging that's the current Godfather of Austrian Economics in America there in that video saying quote "Austrian economics doesn't work."

                    • cels0_o


    • -0-bummer

      Worthless sack of shit, just like always

    • eddy

      fondling the end of the bat for exercise

    • dutch

      better watch what you say about the president. can't make death threats like that.

      • andfukyamoms

        you kind sir, are a retard

      • was that a joke?

        wow. that was truly awful.

    • Dr_Batman

      I swear, if Biden says one more stupid thing on camera I am going to take this bat and beat his ass to death with it.

      • its_forge

        LOL most of us leftie types LOVE Biden's out of the blue remarks. I mean face it, it WAS a Big Fucking Deal.

  • KcCo

    # 20


    • http://twitter.com/DrDrai1122 @DrDrai1122

      #20 there lemme help you out a little

    • https://www.facebook.com/hope.blakely.7 Hope Blakely

      Well I thought the spider joke was pretty funny..

  • whyme1973

    #20 FUCK!!!

  • DB Conor

    #20 I will give you all my money for the video.

    • zoxymusic

      Heck, I'd settle for a GIF

      • http://www.facebook.com/J.Casiano7 Jeramie Casiano

        I second…

        • thebeefinjector

          I third…

          • Guest

            I quattro

            • McSmizzle

              I cinco?

              • Drake

                I 6th, Chive, Make contact with this Woman, and make this happen. Please.

                • Wiley


                  • Loser

                    Would she still post pictures up like that if she was raped? I hear most women tend to become very introverted after the experience.

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