Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose (29 Photos)

  • lllll03lllll

    #3 If only I could be so lucky

    • theycallmedaddy

      pretty sure it's impossible

    • TheDoctor

      #3 The van has a wall light switch?

      • TheDoctor

        Meant #20. Forgive me, I'm an Obama supporter.

  • misschris

    #1 "Death, no, no, cake, cake! Sorry!" "Aaaahahaa! You said death first!" 

    • @Violaceousgirl

      the cake is a lie!

    • heywood jablowme

      death by cake.

    • Omegaman

      I wondered how many people would get this… Simply awesome.

      • Paul

        Idont get it.

        • misschris


          • Anon

            Nice post but I like the lego version 😀

    • sean

      'you're lucky we're C of E'

  • LIJay

    "Uh, death please.." "a-ha!" "I meant cake! I meant cake!" "Oh, alright, you're lucky I'm Church of England…" +100 cool points to those of you who get the reference. For those of you who don't, youtube it!

    • Clowd

      Love Eddie Izzard

    • Niitsitapi13

      I've got legs

      • LIJay

        Do you like….bread? BOOF. Love youuuuuuu

    • Gauge

      "Did I leave the gas on?….. No, I'm a fuckin' squirrel!"

    • Catalystika

      "Hoocha hoocha hoocha… a lobster come out. Wonderful." Man… this could go on all day… heh.

    • MjD

      That was the funniest stand up concert ever. "Dressed to Kill' Eddie Izzard.

    • dusty0601

      "Do you have a flag?"

    • Big Joe


  • non, a

    Nailed it! #21

    • Urethra Franklin

      Black guy landed it!

  • James

    #1 The cake is a lie.

    • Dr_StrangePants

      Fine, the sentence is Death …by Exile

  • bob_the_cook

    #26 ha!

  • non, a

    Please god, no… #11

    • David Johnson

      The words right out of my mouth!!!

  • yotapdat

    #29 whoops

  • TomTheCameraGuy

    #29 Who is this and where is it from?

    • Zoo

      Margaret Nolan… Meh.

      • A BiPolar Guy

        On Margaret Nolan
        Pretty hot once upon a time, in the style of an era when Playboy centerfolds and models of all sorts would be considered "fat" by today's insane standards. They may have been airbrushed, but it there was no photoshop, so those old pictures were more realistic in other ways too.

    • BMOC

      those look spectacular!

  • lovethechunk

    #5 Hey, fat chicks need love 2……they just gotta pay 4 it.

    • echogeo

      It's his bulging white eyes that scare me most.

    • jersey mike

      Fat chicks are like mopeds, fun to ride until your friends see you on one..

      • DrGarnicus

        Nice Archer reference!

    • Thanks Wingmen

      We need a Wingman Post!! It's high time theChive honored these brave heroes!

  • HumpDan

    #19, he's seen it before.

    Just stop cheating.

    • Macro

      Make him feel special by splashing your butt all over the Internet? Woman logic.

      • brucelee

        "he's so mad I cheated on him….I know, I'll post a slutty pic of myself on the internet to prove to him I'm no skank!!!!"

    • pennywise79

      She's a whore, he's a marine. It's a push. Morally bankrupt people deserve each other.

      • SOhioChiver

        eat shit

        • zaffa

          It's ok, the hate keeps me warm at night

      • Mike

        GTFO with your shit….

    • Anon

      Nice assumption here.

    • Greg

      and buy a bigger pair of panties….

    • @nickinwarcal

      I hope he breaks up with you after this

    • techno_viking

      So she submits a pic of her butt that some other guy just went balls deep in…

    • louistulley

      Whoa, whoa, whoa… let's not jump to conclusions… but seriously she probably did.

    • That Juan Guy

      that is one not good looking arse.. seriously -_- the marine should bail.

    • Kevrhutch

      Can you piss me off so I can see you say sorry to me 🙂

    • Bbb

      Never was his gf and never cheated on him, but way to be dbags…Chive is his favorite site, I knew he'd forgive seeig this up there

    • Nathaniel

      yep got to honestly say as a Marine not being cheated on seems like more of a minority in the Corps so hard to find a gal with a lil patience nowadays

  • dmczech

    #29 is like the hottest thing Ive ever sceen.

  • Muad dib

    I don't care who you are… #26 is funny as hell.

  • Macro

    #19 So … what did you do?

    • mrkerrdontplay

      a marine gf? prob rhymes with ducked all his friends' sicks

      • Hara

        That's not an apology, that's part of dating someone, you twat. You can't do what you're supposed to fucking do and call it a favor.

        • navy seal

          Fuck a navy seal….lol!

      • Sam

        Truth…on my tour, in my platoon, 3 people had wives that cheated….on a 6 month tour. Word to the wise my fellow soldiers…that hot chick from the bar into military guys….don't marry her and DO NOT get joining bank accounts.

    • Bbb

      Hey fucks, I was never his gf and I never cheated

  • theycallmedaddy

    #24 how i feel when i run out of beer

  • Sean Robert Hampshire

    #14 lucky bastard

    • SOhioChiver

      i know…markie mark is so hot!

    • sam

      she doesn't seem to be enjoying it, he must not be doing it right.

  • Brendan Byron

    #29 FOR THE WIN!!!

  • Ben

    Still hoping…

  • Niitsitapi13

    #1 Do you like bread?

    • Teea

      I've got french loaf!

  • AnyoneForCoffee


    The name of the journo was "Dot Comme"?….I smell a fish….

    • Flox

      A fake indeed. This was supposedly released in May 91, but the real WWW project wasn't revealed until August 91. Also, this looks much too clean & bright to be from 91.

    • Rick
  • Niitsitapi13

    #19 I hope to god it's not because of a jodie

    • SOhioChiver

      I have a feeling Mary Jane rotten-crotch (it's a Marine thing) will be forgiven

      • dawgbone98

        It's also in nearly every war movie made since Full Metal Jacket

        • Niitsitapi13

          HAHAHAHA, Shut up dip shit. This is real life. As was it then.

      • Niitsitapi13


  • Ryan Marie Pendarvis

    #3 Has never happened to me.
    A new goal has been set.

    • SOhioChiver

      wait until you're about to explode and then push real hard when you let it go!

  • tv_paul

    #14 Gets to do this, has lot o' money and is famous for "Dick in a Box' (Also refers to tapping Jessica Biel )

  • Jhonny5

    #28 is all i need, money and a hot women

    • sam

      after a hard day at work. where does the line form?

    • ImpressMe

      She doesn't like threesomes……. You, your money, and her…. guess whos not in that pic?

  • Chaosd

    #1 Eddie Izzard wins

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