Daily Afternoon Randomness (49 Photos)

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  • diehardcard

    I just heard that there is going to be a massive bacon shortage in the near future! The apocalypse is upon us! The Mayans were right! Or the Christians. Or the Muslims. Or the Norse. Or maybe zombies.

    I don't know, but I'm going to go buy as much bacon as I can get my hands on RIGHT NOW.

  • diehardcard

    I just heard that there is going to be a massive bacon shortage in the near future! The apocalypse is upon us! The Mayans were right! Or the Christians. Or the Muslims. Or the Norse. Or maybe zombies.

  • Derp_Free_Zone

    #12 Get this girl a Chive shirt and get MOAR for me (and the other Chivers of course)

    • Big Poppa

      12 those are very small pants-Captain Obvious

    • caleb

      I'll give you some home ice advantage.

    • Nib

      I live in alberta too, I probably know her!

    • lowercase mcgee

      Really? Half naked girl and your first thought is to get her some clothes?

  • lostagain

    #3 now k…. oh, ok then

    • SmokeyTheBear

      Because German

    • Shadrock7

      Because sisters? (Please?)

    • Daniel Tosh

      now scissor

      • Rizzo

        You gotta be careful with scissors

    • Big Poppa

      their beers gonna be warm

    • BobJ

      Yeah, they are hot, but they do not look comfortable kissing each other.

  • Verbal_Kint

    #14 bet it's gonna be a short match…

    • VedHead77

      I would like to attend that match–but just a little, people!

    • clever

      ahA…ha…haaaa i see what you did there

    • Verbal_Kint

      It dwarfs any plans I had for the weekend.

    • Beev

      That's a tiny bit uncalled for

    • nick

      I'd like to go but I couldn't stand all the small talk

      • thom

        I would go but wrestling isn't that imp-ortant to me.

      • Patrick

        These jokes make me mad, I guess I have a short fuse

    • Ribsta

      I don't know… I think it's a wee bit short of standing up to my (admittedly diminutive) standards.

    • _DoC_

      Dude, thats just low…total below the belt comment.

      • Verbal_Kint

        Clearly, you need to lower your expectations.

        • _DoC_

          I guess so, with what the sport has been reduced to. Got to give these guys credit though, they've got some low hanging balls.

    • Boykin

      Come on guys. Don't be that small.

      • Charlie Sheen

        I don't think these jokes measure up.

    • taylor

      Watching something like that would make me feel like half a person

    • Will

      You just won the Internet

    • Underbaker

      Ahhh professional wrestling, the last safe bastion for being UN-politically correct. Well maybe the chive too.

  • diehardcard

    I just heard that there is going to be a massive bacon shortage in the near future! The apocalypse is upon us! The Mayans were right! Or maybe zombies.

    I don't know, but I'm going to go buy all the bacon I can find.

    • John

      I heard it on the radio-supposedly the cost of pig feed has risen dramatically-and will lead to a shortage of hogs next year.

      • mid13

        the cost of corn continues to rise and that is the main feed of choice for good hog farmers, so we are all taking a hit every year. There's no profit in it like there used to be. =/

        • Verbal_Kint

          Go look in a dumpster behind your local grocery store. We're burying literally tons of viable pig feed in the landfills daily. Corn is so heavily subsidized, it's disgusting. It's basically a worthless crop and yet, we keep paying farmers to grow it. The whole agribusiness and factory farming system is completely fucked up. Corporate welfare on a grand scale.

          • mid13

            you kiddin me bro?! you do NOT feed that to pigs. you might as well go eat that yourself. serve yourself a plate of slop for dinner tonight hun..it would be the same. maybe I'm the only person here who wants good meat, and slop doesn't cut it. I know, I've been raising them for over half of my life, along with black angus and chickens.

            • Verbal_Kint

              You should watch this….http://www.divethefilm.comIt's not slop, and would be perfectly suitable for human consumption, let alone hogs. Some of it get reclaimed and goes to shelters before the dumpster, but too much of it goes to waste.

              • mid13

                Okay, okay, I can see that. Kind of astounding how much does go to waste. I still prefer corn/grain fed hogs, but I do see where you're coming from.

                • Verbal_Kint

                  If you let a pig be a pig, there's almost nothing they wont eat as they are natural omnivores of the highest order. I'm admittedly no expert, and haven't raised pigs, but I would think that giving it a varied diet of everything it WOULD eat if given a choice would yield better meat. Maybe not as fast, or as pink but better flavor, no? My grandparents had pigs in their backyard in Hungary and NOTHING, and I do literally mean nothing in that house went to waste. Those fuckers were delicious too…

                  • Isaac

                    You know what a 400+ lb pig does…whatever the hell it sets its mind to. I've had a few and a pig gets hungry enough, it'll eat you. They'll eat anything and be just fine doing it.

                    • Isaac

                      I'll respond to myself before some wise crack does. 400+lb pigs aren't underfed and no they never went without. I just never seen them not like anything edible.

              • 0331

                If it's on the internet, it has to be true.

    • diehardcard

      I feel like no one is taking this seriously enough. It's a real thing. No joke.

      For the Republicans: http://www.foxnews.com/leisure/2012/09/25/industr

      For the Democrats: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/09/25/porkocal

  • Jeff Lebowski

    #49 I Love You

    • Yeah...

      But we're gonna have to ask you to show the view from behind.

    • VaderWRX

      We're going to need way more than that. Make her Chivette of the week!!

    • Shifty

      We need way MOAR!

    • Dak

      SHE CLEANED THE MIRROR !!

  • elliott

    #39
    kill it with fire

    • http://twitter.com/pezatsea @pezatsea

      #39 Looks just like the spider(s) in Arachnophobia!!

      • OhioChiver

        I have just scratched buying banannas off the shopping list. 😐

    • http://twitter.com/metz730 @metz730

      It's even scarier when they're not dead.

      I took a small one home in a container once back in my youth working produce at a local grocery store. Don't know what kind of spider it was, but it was fascinating all the same.

      • TeslaRaptor

        Fascinating? You think this is a game!!??

    • Taco_Depot

      nothing to see here.

    • Meow

      FUCK FUCK FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

    • torontobackgroundgirl

      Just goes to show that all those insecticides are doing is making the bugs bigger and more horrific.

    • david

      that fucker is the brazilian wandering spider. you do not fuck with those things

    • Karichter

      Daaaayyyyyyyyyyoooooooooooooooooo…daaayyyyyyyyyyyooooooooooo. daylight come and me wanna go home…

      • Cody

        Work all night on a drink a rum, stack banana till the mornin' come…

        • yoav^^^

          Come, Mister Tally Man, tally me banana
          (Daylight come and me wan' go home)
          Come, Mister Tally Man, tally me banana
          (Daylight come and me wan' go home)

    • Cdub

      That is the Brazilian Wandering Spider, Deadliest Spider on planet earth…No Shit.

      • Davi

        I saw that too, but you beat me to it. Google it, people!!

      • Peter Parker

        Wandered all the way from Brazil to some poor bastard's kitchen.

      • Biggus Diccus

        Yep, a bite will kill you in a few hours

    • Underbaker
  • Juan

    #8 The trifecta! Very nice!

    • Grizzle64

      I wanna see a backflip

    • thom

      Oh, there is something in this picture other then great cleavage?!?!

      • IrishMan

        Exactly. MOAR of her.

    • Kyle C.

      clearly the girl is on the swim platform!

    • AnthonySyl

      but the guy in the back is not shotgunning his beer. he is DQed and therefore is has not been one upped

    • erick

      people need to stop calling this surfing. wake skating has a name, and it's not surfing

  • Gmoney

    #3 MOAR please!!

    • emailhobo

      I sure hope there will be more coming with Oktoberfest upon us!

  • It's a drunk life

    #23 anything inside the wallet is a bonus.

    • Changingnumbers

      #18 oops, but hey 23 is nice to I guess

    • moose_nutz

      I want in her ham wallet.

      • Jen

        haha, ham wallet!

    • emailhobo
    • Mr_Cellophane

      Oh, she can have the wallet, the car, the phone. Everything! Except, of course, half the house, half the bank account and my left nut. My (then-ex) wife will be taking those when she finds out!

  • crazyk85

    #11

    'Merica! Fuck Yea! Add a Doritos Locos Taco for desert!

    • crazyk85

      *Dessert

      Screw all of you, I was in a hurry

  • Rick_

    #45 I know the feeling…

    • The Guy

      How long until you lost the feeling in your legs?

  • http://www.facebook.com/emily.gosling Emily Celeste Gosling

    #3 so cute! Fuckin onions all over the place today.

    • http://www.facebook.com/emily.gosling Emily Celeste Gosling

      Oops! #34.
      #3 isn't bad either, tho.🙂

      • zaffa

        did you honestly cry over #34? This whole crying over everything on the chive is getting old.

        • http://www.facebook.com/emily.gosling Emily Celeste Gosling

          Well, teared up a bit, anyway.
          Sorry about that whole not having human emotions thing, that must suck for you.

        • Alicia

          If you've never been a Soldier coming home or known one who came home then i guess you probably wouldn't understand the whole crying thing.

  • Justin

    #39 Bananope!

    • ick

      worked in a produce dept in NJ, we once got a shipment of grapes that was infested with black widow spiders. thank god the refrigeration made them slow

  • http://cinemaplastique.tumblr.com MigraineBoy

    #23 A smile to end all smiles.

    • Dgb

      I'm sorry, what smile?

    • Hand of Fate

      #23 is Nathalia Ramos.

      • thewiz

        gracias

    • DaddyD

      Touchdown Seahawks.

  • Picard_

    #37

    Where's that smile? I just don't see it.

    • Shifty

      Beauty

    • What_Tha

      I had the same problem.

    • Matt Bloom

      Yeah, it seems that you couldn't see anything in the picture other than her tits. Even though, you managed to notice the less obvious comment that was left in the same picture and comment on it, but yeah, you couldn't notice anything outside of her cleavage. I mean, duuuuuuh….I cant see anything outside of her tits either, there was a smile somewhere??? There's something other than boobs? Where? I can't see. So dumb. So old.

      • Dave

        If you look closely, you'll see that she should of had braces when she was younger.

  • Chicago carpenter

    16th or something

  • KayMan

    I'd hit that #16

    • FunKiller

      I thought so to, then I noticed she had a face…..a scary one at that. Definitely a bagger.

    • The Guy

      With some sunshine..

    • Kodos

      Did she win one?

      No?

      Then fuck the Emmys.

    • DrGarnicus

      THE Marilyn Manson?

    • http://www.facebook.com/harry.sidhu.96 Harry Sidhu

      Disgustingly pale…

    • Dek

      From the back yeah. Her face is busted though.

    • http://twitter.com/jaczor @jaczor

      Ugly as sin, but man those are some lovely boobs.

      • vince

        fuck yall kat dennings is fine

    • LuvsHorror

      Looks like a corpse.

    • What_Tha

      With a shovel.

    • Erik D

      Way too pale and busted ass face. And what's up with all the white knight faggots on here? Can't say a girl looks bad without getting tons of down votes?

      • Dave

        I'd hit it too…with a baseball bat.

  • Aaron

    #9 made me laugh WAY too hard.

    • chiver

      toooo funny

    • abaffuto

      Hilarious!

    • Andrew

      LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL GO SEAHAWKS

    • PalpGutz

      I'm going to hell but that was way too funny.

    • AssHaterson

      Go Hawks!!!

  • r1rider

    #3 perfect

  • LACHIVER

    #23 I'd review that play a few times

    • Kodos

      and signal touchdown!

  • sjd

    #36
    That kids got potential.

  • remember?

    #48 because it's new and evocative and not the same old tired t&a crap

  • pimpninjaa

    #23 #33 moar!
    #47 yum to miss munn

    • Ribsta

      #33 = Polly Parsons

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