Love is grand, divorce is a hundred grand (14 Photos)

  • benny

    #1 $425M isn't enough to make up for that mullet still!

    • KrazedKaptain

      Snake Plisken had a mullet… 'nough said

  • Honey boo boo

    Finally a male wins

    • Yogi Bear

      Hey hey hey honey boo boo! I wanna be your step pappy!

      • Jon G

        Male wins?…at the cost of dignity.

        • KeepinCalm

          $90 Million – my 'dignity' would be just fine.

          • Jay cutler


            • upset bears fan

              Get better for next Sunday brother

          • black27696

            I can BUY dignity.

          • Mars

            I'll give you my dignity for 90 million.. It's for sale

            • dcannon1

              I'll take half that for my dignity.

              • Eff it

                I'll settle for 10M for my dignity

    • truth

      Let's be honest. He did have to sleep with Madonna so he was kinda owed one by Karma.

  • Jebus

    #5 'misstep' – I see what you did there. Heather Mills is a dirty one legged pirate hooker! Garrr!

    • Jen

      "holla, we want prenup – WE WANT PRENUP!"

  • izismile


  • SmokeyTheBear


  • joeybastardo

    And they say monet doesn't buy happiness.Jeeesusss!!

    • joeybastardo


      • Eduardo the gardener

        No no – you were right the first time. Monets' work is frankly depressing

    • Big Joe

      Money may not buy happiness, but it will buy a jet ski. Have you ever seen an unhappy person on a jet ski?

    • Silverstone

      I have no idea why you mentioned him!
      First of all, Monet's first name was Claude, not Jesus.
      And he didn't get divorced- Camille Monet died of tuberculosis while they were still married.

  • psh

    Jordan shits that kind of money #11. He dealt with it cleanly

    • tv_paul

      Than he really does wipe with $100 bills.

  • WileEOne

    Like I always say: Cheaper to Keep her.

    • iheartboobiez

      But better to shed her

    • tommy2X4

      The old question is: Why is divorce so expensive? A: Because it's worth it!

      • Handjob Murphy

        Worth every penny.

  • Yerp

    #3 yeah, but look who he's with now…

    • Kyle

      That chick even looks like a cunt

    • Random

      Worth every penny.

  • Yeahhh

    #5 one legged C-rag.

    • 6655321

      Candy rag?

  • Sick350Z

    And for the win…. George Clooney.

    • Alorac

      Clooney is gay

    • theonetwo

      dont forget leo

    • The True Schrude


  • teslawasrobbed

    The moral of the story: Don't get rich.

    • MylesofStyles


    • AKchiver

      more like dont be rich and married!!

    • J Bone

      the moral of the story: Don't get married.

    • Maytrix

      The amounts that many of them paid isn't a big deal – 10-20% of their worth perhaps in most cases. Point is – even after these settlements, they are still rich 🙂

    • glenco


      • Dgaf

        Moral…fuck bitches get money!!!

    • T-Dawg

      Either get rich or get married, you have em both!!

  • Ethix_

    theChive already posted this entire gallery.

    • Yerp

      So? It's the first time I've seen it.

    • Simon

      And the Chive hosts pointless comments in every post.

      Not every idea is a lightbulb, not every invention is the wheel. You gotta keep trying though.

  • TotesAwesome

    #8. Bc she's a dumb, talentless bitch who has stole almost every song she's made. Hopefully he'll make more movies like Snatch.

    • Hulk Hgan

      I'm sure he's been pitching plenty of snatch since the divorce brother!!!

    • Silverstone

      Ahhh!- so YOU'RE the one who saw that flick!

    • BostonGeorge

      Snatch, what a fantastic movie.

  • Schnizz56

    #10 that's not his ex. That's wife no.2 Trisha Yearwood.

    • tom


    • lookma nohandz

      um, no, it's not… and Garth GAVE Sandy the money if I recall. He wasn't ordered to…

    • epic391

      look again champ

      • Schnizz56

        They changed the pic after my original post. Champ

        • Waste Treatment King


    • Schnizz56

      Thanks John for all the thumbs down on the switcheroo

  • Buckethead

    Avoid marriage lol

  • tv_paul

    #13 His new movie "The Expendable Income"

    • Verbal_Kint

      The Sperminator… He came from the future to knock up a maid…

      • tv_paul

        Maybe Raw Deal or True lies would be more appropriate.

    • The maidinator

      "Who is your daddy and what does he do?"
      "You are!"
      "You can't prove that!"

  • DDD

    Why does divorce cost so much? BECAUSE ITS WORTH IT!!!

    • Cudaman

      What's the shortest sentence? Yes. What's the longest sentence? I do.

  • matt b

    heard a new one recently. instead of getting married just find a girl you really hate and buy her a house, save yourself all the inbetween

  • Verbal_Kint

    A romantic evening drive into the desert is sooo much cheaper… and a shovel…

    • Steve carell

      Don't forget the bag of lime

  • Gallus

    Let's get this straight – you don't have to be rich to lose your @ss in a divorce settlement. I have an ex-wife who decided she didn't want to be married to a disabled veteran. In an act of complete hypocricy, she went after my disability pension. She didn't get it, but the settlement cost me plenty. I will be 12-years paying it off. I am now on year eight. I remain unmarried. Questions?

    • tronbot

      no question, just a statement: FUCK HER. semper fi brother.

      • Dave

        no no, that's what got him into this mess

    • Silverstone

      Dude….take a deep breath, relax the muscles, and chill. There ain't nowhere that anyone said only rich people lose their butts, okay?
      (FYI I'm divorced too!!!)


    why in the world are any of those women entitled to that much fucking money?!?!?!? I don't get it.. the guy goes and earns it and because something happens and they don't get along she get's half for what? You know she's not at home cooking or cleaning.. the bitch is out spending it so why get that much? This court system is FUCKED!

    • OK Chiver

      because the court sees it – he gave her a standard of living and should be continued especially if she does not work.

      • Iggy Catalpa

        Because when you marry, you're basically signing a contract that states that what you earn DURING THE MARRIAGE is both of yours. So, the wife is entitled to "her" half. Fair? Of course not. That's why they invented the Pre-Nup. Any rich man who weds and doesn't use one is a fool. It's that simple.

        • Daywalker

          What I don't get is Jerry Hall, Linda Hamilton & Mrs Ex'Expendable all have money of their own, why are they getting settlements?

        • Simon

          Nowhere near fair, as far as I see it. Sure, you and any children should be entitled to some kind of decent standard of living, but that shouldn't encompass anything above the basic life that our lack-of-something-or-other is destined to reward us with.

          That said, how many of these people actually deserve their fortunes? I have no idea.

    • socalmarti

      Because they all CHEATED!!!! Women commit and give a home, cook, clean, nurture… and all of these men decided that they wanted something else. That's fine. Now, they have to take the moral, ethical, and financial resposibility for their choices!!! I don't understand what's happened to men. 60 yrs. ago men where not such whiny cry babies about their choices and having to deal whith the reprecussions of them!!!!

      • Drew

        that's stupid… obviously cheating is a vile deed that shouldn't go unpunished, but cheating isn't the only thing that leads to divorce, and males aren't the only ones who do it. As far as your 60 years ago comment is concerned, stupid again. In the 1950's men cheated on their wives far more than women cheated on their husbands, whereas now those statistics are moving towards equal. Men aren't getting worse, we've always been idiots. Women are however catching up quickly, so go ahead and hop of that high horse of yours there chief.

        • socalmarti

          All of the men in this post cheated on their wives. I'm pretty sure more than once. 60 years ago when men cheated and left, you never EVER heard them crying about having to man up and be responsible for their poor choices financially, especially if they where wealthy. You can either stay on topic or we can discuss how women make less money than men do for the same jobs and are usually primary caretaker's of children therefore requiring men to step up to the plate, albeit begrudgingly. There's a huge difference between a high horse and the truth, chief! 😉

      • thrillhouse

        It amuses me that you believe maria shriver or any of those other useless hags would actually cook, clean, or do any other kind of manual labor. In reality, it is much more likely that they spent their husband's money on paying for servants to do that stuff for them.

        • socalmarti

          It amuses me that you think Maria Shriver, a Kennedy btw used him and not the other way around!

      • blanket

        I can guarantee you that none of these people pictured above has ever touched a toilet other than to leave a dump.

  • BeeGirl

    RICH people problems…awe…

    • Tim

      poor people jealous…awwwww

  • ted

    So Women are cunts after marrying for money? who knew

  • disgruntled

    unbelievable!! 90% of these women are trophy wives. Judges shouldn't have given them a dollar!!

    • hara

      It's called "trophy wife" because it's good for nothing but looking good in the home. All the male/female BS could be done away with if people would just stop fucking morons. Get you a chick that works and makes her own money. Then you just gotta make sure she gets off real hard and she'll never leave.

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