I wish they weren’t, but these things are all just too true (33 Photos)

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  • Chris

    Still better than someone posting "first".

  • bkibbs

    #33 Sometimes I don't even do that and let the defogger do its magic.

    • Geno

      They make a spray that melts it instantly and all you do is put your wipers on. Pays working in an auto parts warehouse.

      • PianoFingers

        If you take a pitcher of warm water from the faucet and pour over, it has the same results. + it's cheaper than a spray gadget. + there's no chemicals (hopefully) in the water.

  • Just sayin'

    #14 Definitely!

  • Lyrex

    #28 – Love me some TPB!

    • gabe

      they're coming to chicago in Dec. Can't wait!

      • CanadianChivette

        They're great! Met them in my hometown bar a couple years ago!!

  • given time

    #10 we say that now.

    I bet that actually retiring rich to the younger generations will not only involve cigars and a beach house, but a LANing yacht as well.

  • tom

    I thought your mama made u get a job

    • Josh

      welcome back!

  • Murph

    #32… We still have them in Canada!

    • CanadianChivette

      Not for long now that you told all the Americans!! jk jk we have our share up here, too!!

  • Alex

    #33 HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHA

  • Coop

    WELLL DONE BOYS…im howling…people at work are now certain that im not working.

  • Gene

    #7 – Newton didn't say that, it was misattributed to him in 1958. The walls built by Israel are to protect them from nonstop attacks…the "bridge" approach didn't work.

    • gma

      It certainly doesn't sound like Newton. He hated people, ridiculed them, spent a lot of time apologizing to people he offended and later found he had need of.

  • chucklesclown

    #9 If he'd just put his knees down, he'd be fine.

  • stuckatwork

    #28. Smokey! Fuck you Lahey.

    • Murph

      The sh*t winds are coming Randy.

      • Steve_French

        We're sailing into a shit typhoon Randy, we'd better haul in the jib before it gets covered in shit

        • Chivette

          Baaaarb, those were my personal burgers!

  • Not gay

    DUDE YOUR BACK!!! YOU MAKE MY DAY. FUCK YA ILL SUCK YOU ALL THE WAY OFF. AND DON'T TELL ME WHEN YOUR GOING TO CUM. I LIKE THE SUSPENSE.

    • GramNaz

      You're yelling with incorrect grammar again.

  • Upgrayedd

    #18, Wakes up @ 3pm, gets to work instantly @ 3pm, Doesnt make it home until 3am. at least he is getting 12 hours of sleep.

    • Upgrayedd

      It is apparently always 3 o'clock in Employee Man land. That way even when you're sleeping you feel guilty about not being at work.

  • FuckUSA

    Fuck yea 28 go Canada

    • CanadianChivette

      Best!

  • BPRugger

    #26 made me choke on my lunch

  • jun

    #13 = nearly every person I know. I ran 29 miles this morning in 25 degree temps to help a friend on her Birthday Challenge. I haven't been in a gym in 2 years.

    • gma

      So who held a fucking gun to your head and made you do that. Get over your fucking self.

  • gimletmike

    #8
    Language is an evolving thing. If enough people call a group of squids a squad of squids eventually it will become accepted and part of the language.

  • squosh

    #15 I guess it was the one without the awesome Doctor Who poster.

  • Penal_Colony

    #1 That song is totally about date rape.

  • Cortez

    #25 – Awesome words, spoken by an awesome man – May he R.I.P..

    • De Soto

      Amen, Cortez. Humor in subjective, but in my opinion Bill Hicks was comedic genius who was taken from us far, far too soon, and as a result, the world is a poorer place. R.I.P. Bill.

  • Bcbigbuds

    rip dave on wheels

    • Under my bridge

      Poor dave on wheels… what a tragic story that was.

  • Brian

    #12

    I'm going with 2012 as you were not spending all your money on your girlfriend so you had enough left over to get the tree.

  • JTW

    #18 And he did it all in under a minute!

  • Hiro

    #20 -said the radio

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