Please, just let me help you (32 Photos)

  • Bob me

    Chive is reddit regurgitated

    • Idk

      And reddit is usually just consolidated material from other places on the Internet so whats your point and why do you keep coming here?

    • Craigery

      Your comment is a million other comments regurgitated. Your complaint is less original than anything the Chive has every posted.

    • sureman123

      yes.. but reddit sucks to navigate.. your point??

      • Steve

        Thank you, I can't stand the layout of reddit. I don't have time to filter all that shit.

    • 5280Blazin

      You know how many times we have heard that comment regurgitated. You are like asshole #1254

      Go back to Reddit, we will survive somehow without you.

      Heads up tho don't go to the Berry. Some say it is similar to the Chive as well.

    • Blad

      you're a regurgitation of your mom's vagina.

      • I like this stuff.


    • Eatshitanddie

      Bob me…bite me

  • 29er

    #22 I can't believe I wasted my time actually reading this.

    • ricardo

      i thought the joke was he doesn't know how to use punctuation..

    • Timer

      I dont know I thought it was pretty funny

    • dinker

      Says the person posting comments on an entertainment website…

    • testudo321

      WTF did I just read ?

  • bigyawns

    #2 Shore you can use my laptop

    • GatOner

      Just don't go surfing through my browser history…

    • JakePic

      Beach now you owe me a new laptop

    • Cosmo Kramer

      I sea what you did there.

    • Ihavenowittycomment

      When internet porn and sex on the beach collide…

    • peter

      we can all wave goodbye to that computer

    • Puntasmonmyface

      I'm urchin you all to stop this madness.

    • gclark

      Looks like shes getting wet with excitement.

    • SaxMan

      I love puns

    • Groggy

      I would sure bikini if she got a new laptop after that. Desktops just leave you tide down.

  • ski

    I usually judge whether a gallery ours good out not by the number of comments it has, hope that's just not me

    • duh

      i usually judge whether a comment is good or not by the grammar….

    • trotterman

      It would help if we could understand what in the hell you're talking about.

    • Fuman Zybar

      Go home ski, you're drunk

  • em3

    #32 just why?

    • Notknowing

      I laughed way too hard at this. The guy saw his sex life coming to an end and did NOTHING to stop it……..dummy….still laughing as I write this.

      • sureman123

        ha ha ha.. tru dat… oh.. wait.. maybe he was trying to see what happens to sex after being married 10 years…. could be…….

    • thatguy

      I think this is the guy they call "horse." He was on America's Got Talent this past year and as I recall, got pretty far on the show doing this exact crap. Said for some reason he doesn't have too much pain from it and actually DOES have a kid

      • toomanymarbles

        They should rename the show "Ow my balls!"

    • 5280Blazin

      Because natural selection works

    • Jeff

      what a dumbass Darwin awaits you

    • RogerThat

      Welcome to 'Merica!

  • CanadaChivette

    #6 hahaha I love this.

    • Jesus Christ

      At least he's not being overbearing

    • Craigery

      I don't get it.

    • Sme

      I don't get this one….

      • Blackstarrline

        Well, the bartender keep wishing these holidays upon this person (assuming it's a her) But yet, all three times she hasn't even responded back to the bartender. So chances are, she wants nothing to do with him & he's still not picking up the cue.

        • Sme

          Cool, thanks. I don't know iPhones – am an Android fan – so I just thought Joe the Bartender sent holiday greetings to everyone in his address book and doesn't really give a shit that this one isn't responding.

          • Urethra Franklin

            I would respond to Joe. He's courteous, thoughtful, and can get you free drinks on the clock

          • iJoe

            I know for a fact that you can do that on iPhones

    • Hunter

      you must get a lot of those, poor guys.

    • Joe Bartender


    • Busternut

      Ignorant bastard.

    • toomanymarbles

      I tend to think that he just includes this person in his mass texts and doesn't really care that they don't respond. There are certainly a few people in my phone that only get texted at times like this.

  • 29er

    #5 I don't get it, and I'm not really here to think. so…..

    • jojo

      lemon is yellow, that green drink has lime in it

    • jojo

      lemon is yellow, thats a lime

      • lemurfart

        lol, or that its lemon party, look it up

      • penguin slayer

        OH! 😦

      • lemonlime

        I don't think that's it. In other countries they call the green lemon and yellow lime.

    • Ed Venture

      I'll give you a hint.

      What color are lemons?

      • 29er

        That just shows how drained I am from teaching this week.

      • Idk

        That and lemon party was a video of a bunch of old men having gay sex.

    • Jesus Christ

      It's a lime…

      • Idk

        Well the original comment got deleted but another issue with that is that "lemon party" was something you would tell your friends to check out online like 2 girls 1 cup. It was a bunch of old dudes having sex with each other.

        • Jesus Christ

          Oh I remember that site. I still get people with it today.

    • Dangles

      It's a lime.

    • Salas

      me neither please help!!

    • Jonathan

      I think this is a failed fail. It looks like a lemon in green liquid, or the glass is green, actually. The tiny part over the rim of the glass doesn't look green.

    • bmorejbd

      google lemon party

    • Orukal

      The joke is in the word, "Lemon Party." If you were to google it, you'd understand, but do so at your own risk. Sexually explicit old gay men.

  • blue_bronco


    Well played.

  • nic

    "Wait a sec, coma people can't text"

    Hahaha laughed way harder than Ii should have

    • @Exile714

      Then he gets a message saying it's Kelly's mom texting on her behalf, then the doctor says she doesn't think Kelly's going to make it…

  • MeanSt

    #6 there's a few of these in my phone!

    • Hunter

      you must be so cool

      • Ben Dardundat

        As if you're batting a thousand…

    • Kyle

      then you're a cunt, stop ignoring people people who are nothing but nice to you

  • RooFeeOOO

    I really wish I could get paid as a "free lance internet meme specialist" so companies like #5 can run it by me just to make sure things like this and SusAnaluBumParty didn't go out. Dream job

    • Craigery

      Or maybe someone should have just pointed out that lemons are yellow, not green.

      • 5280Blazin

        Lemons can be painted green idiot

    • P3king

      I wish I could upvote you again for the reference to SusAnaluBumParty. That one still makes me crack up every time I see it.

  • sfb101

    #5 If they only knew…
    #10 Reminds me of some of the engineers I work with.
    #13 YEA!
    #23 No shit.

    • 5280Blazin

      #10 You work at Boeing?

  • jojo

    #20 i dont get it

    • Dangles

      It's a clear bottle. You don't need the "actual size" image when you can clearly see the size of the pills.

    • CanadaChivette


    • Garrett

      why show an "actual size" picture, when the bottle is see through.

      • Dr Cooper

        It's so you can't fill it with E or oxy or whatever and pass it for the bottled pill

        • 5280Blazin

          Well it was funny before you arrived…… thanks

          With your legitimate explanations and shit

    • Garrett

      why show an "actual size" picture, when the bottle is see through.

    • IrishInNJ

      There is nothing to "get". It shouldn't be in the post. The picture of the pill is so people can confirm what is in the bottle SHOULD be in the bottle. There's nothing here folks…move on.

    • Forasyoudounto...

      I didn't even notice the actual size/clear bottle bit. I thought it was about the "Do not give to children" and then directions on how to give to children, etc.

      • Forasyoudounto...

        Correction: "Keep out of reach of children", etc.

    • spodac

      It says "Inactive ingredients".

  • anonymous

    #30 =wow

    • HUH?

      dont tell him /her how the movie "lincoln" ends, let it be a surprise.

    • 5280Blazin

      Typical Bieber fan. Essentially a monkey without hair and brain damage.

  • Jesus Christ

    #20 Am I missing something? #1 Just look it up on the Google box.

    • 29er

      I'm assuming the pill size when it's a clear bottle.

      • Jesus Christ

        I suppose

    • demtittes

      Inactive ingredients

      • Jesus Christ

        There's nothing harmful about those ingredients. I'm gonna stick with 29er.

      • BryanT

        inactive ingredients just means they are non-medical (ie just filler)

  • tralfaz

    I think the guy in the front of #15 might be an actual zombie.

  • JBalI17

    #30 7 billion…

    • Jesus Christ

      Thanks Captain Planet

  • boob_cuddler

    I want humps!!!!!!

    • CPO Inyerface

      Wrong thread, moron.

      • boob_cuddler

        What a troll. There was no hump day thread at the time of my posting. Moron.

        • CPO Inyerface

          Then why don't you wait for a fucking hump thread, idiot, instead of posting your dribble on this one. Troll, indeed. Your input was more troll-like than my getting on your ass about it…

  • echogeo



    #30 Wow There's over 7 billion people in the world a simple google search would have told her that. I'm assuming its a girl because of the name 2013justinbieberfan.

  • Everclear

    #23 Every. Time.

    Never learn.

  • goldengekko1


  • LCR915

    #30 give her a break, she's a justin bieber fan.

  • GatOner

    #22 Was awesome… because I do know that feeling.

    • It Does Mine

      So, underage sex affects your real estate purchases?

  • Craigery

    #29 Doesn't need help. He's not stuck. That's how they catch prey in snow: the locate it by hearing its movement under the snow, then they jump up and dive headfirst into the snow to catch the critter.

    • adMANistrator

      This is why you couldn't get along with Elliot.

    • Madcat151

      foxes rule

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