Daily Morning Awesomeness (35 Photos)

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  • BrandieBear

    Screw sleep its DNA time!!!!

    • BrandieBear

      Damn auto correct its DMA time

      • Donkey

        Well it's also DNA time for me…..

        • Donkey


        • Ponderous

          I just sprayed all my DNA because of #3

      • notawittyname

        I dunno, DNA is pretty cool man.

      • Manic Insomniac

        Hell, yeah! (Thumbs up in general… and for not mentioning the F-word.)

    • non, a

      You were so close man, maybe next time.

      • Mikeg01sf

        Swing and a miss

  • g3nXsLack3r

    #32 Alright "life", you bitch, here's the deal. Enough with the kids already! Every child deserves a healthy, happy, pain-free childhood. I get it, life's not fair, but I'm sure for every kid you let slide, you could find a deserving adult to take their place. The cast of "Jersey Shore", any of the Kardashians, and Chris Brown would all be a great start. Hell, I've had a pretty good run, even if it's me, then it's me. Just leave the kids alone!

    • Brandon

      F***ing awesome post kcco

    • Mike

      The universe doesn't owe anyone anything

      • Pedro

        You're right. The above post is a nice sentiment but there would be far fewer genetic abnormalities if men and women had kids when their sperm and eggs were more viable. Men and women who wait until their 30's and 40's to have kids are only asking for trouble; downs syndrome, autism, increase in cancer rates, even issues as simple as learning disabilities would all be curbed if parents had kids at a younger age. I wish kids like this luck but if you want to reduce the likelihood of your kid being sick, start young.

        • Pedrosachump

          Yeah because life works like that! "I'm now in my 20's, the universe has just magically aligned for me so that I met the girl of my dreams, our financial situation is stable and both our bodies will do exactly as we want!" ……..Fucking douche, think before you type!

          • Pedro

            maybe learn a little bit about genetics and basic human reproduction before you freak out. My point was about biology, and how the extraneous circumstances you mentioned are not actually taken into account by your testicles and their production of sperm. Point mutations increase in men as we get older, and women's best eggs are released in the early years of fertility. Your balls won't wait until your bank account has more than 1 comma. If you want to reduce the probability of having sick kids, have them young. You're right about the universe, the increased entropy of human physiology only increases as we age.

            • pedrosfishing

              I read your first post again and agree that there would be fewer cases of the diseases you mentioned, I don't however understand why you posted the comment. Many people cannot control when they have kids, and they certainly don't think "Shit we're pregnant at 30 lets abort the baby as it may have Autism". It seems to me that you simply brought up this point to show off your vast knowledge of biology and genetics, or you were hoping someone would bite and start a debate on the links between Autism and the amount of immunizations babies are given these days. Which one is it?

              • pedrosachumpafterall

                Looks like I out-smarted the almighty Pedro!

            • JESSE (M.D.)


    • Mimoboy

      My thoughts exactly.
      Awesome post.

    • Hank Hill

      Awesome, dude. Take me, too. Just leave the kids be.

      • Justin Cider

        Way to go little guy you are fucking Superman!!!!

    • Hazel

      I told my dad that I would gladly take on any disease out there if only to spare my daughters from pain and suffering. A short while later as he was in the hospital passing from Kidney and Liver failure he said to me that he gladly took those diseases so I wouldn't have to suffer them. Thank you Daddy! Miss you – and my offer stands – I too would suffer so my children or any children wouldn't have to.

    • CosmoKramerTheAssMan

      you fuckin' right. couldn't say it better.


    • Jimbo Himself

      you're an idiot

      • techno_viking

        And you're a fucking asshole.

        • Jimbo Himself


          • Murph1908

            The voting says otherwise.

            • Jimbo Himself

              you guys are so sweet xoxoxo

              • Jimbo Himself

                im not the one wishing cancer on others, though the people mentioned are just, terrible, that's fucked up I stick by my comment so fuck the world, feed it beavers.

                • http://facebook.com/kccohockey kcco hockey

                  Take the kids, I have responsabilities! Better yet if you and your matr are predisposed for shitty diseases… just have sex for fun not conception.

                  • http://facebook.com/kccohockey T Basham

                    Lets be honest most children are here because of an accident or selfishness of adults needing something to need them

  • Greg


  • navydudenamedjoe

    #19 now I know…

    • 1032

      ….and knowing is half the battle.

      • heywood jablowme

        the other half is dodging that incoming missile

        • Jack Wagon

          Dont bother with the counter measures either, they never work in the movies. And we all know if its on tv, its gotta be true

  • Rusty Shackleford

    #7 Should have keyed that onto the hood instead

    • g3nXsLack3r

      Flat tires is a little less aggressive but still gets the point across.

      • Child Please

        Point being, if you want these spots so bad? Here's a flat. Enjoy your stay, bitch.

    • Big Joe

      I always park as close as I can to these assholes. When they're climbing in from the passenger side, maybe they'll use that time to think about what they've done.

    • drew

      I put a note like this on a car that parked like this. I found out the car before him parked soo poorly that he had to park like an ass. Could be that it's not his fault

      • KBCool

        I once left a note on someone's car saying "sorry I scratched your car, but figured you were too busy to swap insurance giving you're parking job. I probably shouldn't have used a sandy towel to try and wipe my paint off. I think it actually made it worse." It was priceless watching him circle the car for 15 minutes trying to find the non-existent scratch

    • http://www.chunder.weebly.com Will

      #7 I think 12 1" roofing tacks distributed equally amongst the four tires would be a better warning. Can't get out of the parking lot when you have 4 flats! (although the scratch story was priceless!)

    • andulamb

      I would only retaliate if I witnessed the parking job. Because otherwise there's no way to know how other cars were parked when this person parked. Sometimes one person is off a little, and the next person is off more, and eventually no one can park between the lines. Then everyone leaves and the one person remaining looks like an asshole.

      • steveraimer

        You sir, have won the internets

  • moses

    #26, close the freezer door. What are you trying to do… refrigerate the whole house?

    • myself

      That's such a sad pic. That's not a look of jealousy, but sad resignation, or maybe the birth of an evil villain.

    • Bubba

      She's chillin'

    • Hank Hill

      I say make it a 3 way. Even if one is not as hot, it's still a 3 way.

    • FunKiller

      You're letting all the bought air out.

  • navydudenamedjoe

    #33 and I'll take a side of nope with that

    • Skrewed

      shoulda ordered that side of Nope a little earlier…

  • ToewsFTW

    #6 Why would you EVER need a "- Breasts" button?? Why don't you just slap God in the face while you're at it…

    • g3nXsLack3r

      Mute is still gonna get all the work.

    • Clucker

      Wait till she gives you a couple of kids. When they start looking like a tennis ball in a tube sock, you'll understand the -breasts button.

      • Agreed

        Haha ya, like a couple of fried eggs nailed to the wall.

  • Tiber_Septim

    #21 congrats on the Cancer remission

  • cnollz

    God Carrie Fisher was so attractive.

    • SOSteppenwolf

      I would like to do #17 to #3. If you catch my drift. Eh… wink, wink, nudge, nudge

    • Guz

      Exactly. People make a big thing of the metal bikini, but it was her that made it.

  • Canucks_Rule

    #28 – so much truth here. lol.

    • Anomanom

      Well you can't put magneto in a regular cage.

    • Underbaker

      Because the movie would have been so interesting if they never escaped.

  • Anonymous

    #28 my mind has just been blown.

    • tbag

      And they are all British :)

      • Anonymous

        Stop it, I'm in a different country and I have to work in the morning. I can't have you keeping me awake with life altering facts.

      • Catlover

        …I'm not sure Stitch is British.

    • Ghilo

      Who's the fifth one?

      • Will

        Rumored to be Khan in the new Star Trek film.

  • Anjin San

    Is it just me, or she does not look like Carrie Fisher?

    • Dr_StrangePants

      just shut up and fap

    • nathanzafar

      didn't notice until you said that. but yeah… doesn't look like carrie fisher.

    • DrGarnicus

      No one rocks it like she did in this bikini!

      • Lookee here

        Actually her stunt double did…cuz thats her stunt double in this pic.

  • Inquiring Minds

    #9 I don't quite get #9. Is it that she's not fully participating in the photo?

    #17 Awesome, but WTF?

    • halfsmoke00

      #9 Her hair is on fire from the candle.

    • Cory

      #17 is from Nitro Circus

  • http://twitter.com/brueapilsner @brueapilsner

    #29 Pssst! Green KCCO are already selling..

    • ...

      Only for women, and small or fat guys. Never any for a med or large guy. McDonalds tilted the "average" size to fatty so now its 10,000 XLs and 200 meduims and larges every order…. :(

      • Tanya

        Been trying to score a Medium men's for a friend of mine forever, just can't pull it off. Got his wife one though.

      • Jack Rabbit

        LOL. So everyone who wears a XL is fat?

      • Ha ha

        Must suck needing little boy sizes

    • Hank Hill

      I wouldn't wash my damn truck with a men's medium T-shirt.

    • Bhodi

      Alex should have a post, just sayin…

  • Jackie Treehorn

    #7 there is a special place in hell for that rotten son of a bitch

  • The Batman

    #19 I guess you were in he highway *puts on sunglasses* to the danger zone!!!

    • Fred Flintstone


  • buttsnstuff

    #7 Especially in a damn Mustang

  • MattKL

    #3 Always awesome. And will always be.

    • Candlejack

      I will again ask why there hasn't been a Chivettes in Princess Leia Bikinis gallery!

  • Nate

    In light of the last charity.. I have dedicated my term project for neuroscience to complex regional pain syndrome. It's going to be a proposal on a new treatment protocol. Including hypobaric therapy. Also, way to kick ass chive.

    • Anomanom

      Boss, sir!

  • Nate

    This was a whole lot of lame…I mean that in the nicest way possible.

  • p1ll

    #11 this is why we are F@cked

    • Dr_StrangePants

      Why would I smoke a cigar that wort'h a month of your groceries and gasoline?

    • Notknowing

      What a waste of gold! First they put it in alcohol, now cigars. WTF, MAN. WTF!?

  • Jawbone

    #11 it'll make it easier to identify assholes on sight at least.

  • Tommy

    Who is #29 ??? She's too cute

    • bones

      Alex, and she needs more attention!

  • Pvtdeth

    #11 that whole box contains maybe $10 worth of gold.

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