6. I had a roommate my freshman year of college who never stayed in our dorm because a friend of his lived off campus. One day after getting out of class early I opened the door to find him standing butt naked humping a Sock Em Bopper (the inflatable boxing gloves). He paused, looked at me dead in the eye and said “close the door on your way out and sit in the hall or something. Ill be done in a minute.” True to his word about 2 minutes later he walked out fully dressed, winked at me, and told me to have a great semester. Only saw him around campus after that.
7. I thought nobody was home when I got home and remembered my sister borrowed my laptop to do her school work the night before. I go to her room to get it and she has it playing porn while she is pounding herself with a cucumber. I’ve never ran out of the house so fast. Went and hung out with a friend til later when everyone would be home. Never mentioned what I saw to anyone until now.
8. I was madly in love, I got off work a bit early, picked up fish and chips for my amazing fiancee, who just a month before had said yes to my proposal.
Unfortunately, I when I got home, earlier than she expected, I literally walked in on her fucking some dude. Both ass naked going at it like the end of the world. (And yet, we hadn’t had sex in months because she “hadn’t been feeling well”) Some guy I’d never seen before, in my fucking apartment, on my fucking bed, with my fucking woman. They didn’t even hear me come in the apartment lol.
In hindsight, I’m glad I found out before we got married. But it still really fucked me up. I wanna say I did something awesome like beat the guy up or whatever, but I just waited (took a good 30 seconds) for her to notice me and then walked out. It was that, or murder the fucking pair of them right then and there. Sometimes I wish I had done just that. But only sometimes.