I had a professor like this in college — physics; he was from Boston, had a bit of an accent, irish heritage, funny with a pretty good sense of humor.
He starts our first class with a stack of reviews like this, they’re ordered from good to bad. He reads the first few, pretty positive, several sentences each; he gets a bit bored of those, so he flips the stack over and reads the very last one. It only says:
“You s*ck, I hope you die.”
Everyone gets a good laugh, including him. This is in like 1998 or so, so after everyone settles down, he says:
“To whoever that is, if you’re in the class, I just want to assure you, that sometime in the middle of the next century, I will definitely die.”
Still one of my favorite in-class memories. -mattbillenstein