• jenny

    #5 is the only one i agree with

    • Call You Out

      There's nothing wrong with Mariah. Don't be a hater.

    • BigHate

      That's pre-crazy Mariah back when she was hot.

      • Bob

        Dude must be a gay, she looks great in the unphotoshopped pic

        • db3300

          You don't really think the first one isn't 'shopped, do you?

  • tom

    "Hey, boss, which tool should I use to lengthen her dress?" #16

    "Permanent marker"

    • Matt

      Rofl! Hilarious

    • mrjimmyos


    • Dookes

      Funny thing is, everyone over here in the middle east says boss. (American stationed in the middle east)

  • Apollos

    fucking savages

    • DaddyD

      And yet … virtually no rape.

      • wickedjack

        lol yea, because they're not allowed to report it!

      • Haterade

        you know what the number one cause of pedophelia is?
        sexy babies.

      • Jack

        Unless your a little boy. Seriously.

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/Pol-Gas/100001029946145 Pol Gas

        You obviously know nothing about the Middle East.

        There is rape in there but women generally don't report it. In order to report a rape, a woman has to have 4 witnesses. Even if she succeeds, she suffers terrible stigma and discrimination. Otherwise, she gets thrown in jail and whipped for adultery, if she is lucky not to get stoned to death.

        BTW. Yes they also f*ck camels. Sodomy is also a widespread practice. Just goes to show, repressing sexual urges does bad things for you. Just look at some of those Catholic priests.

        They really should be allowed to check out The Chive.

      • Dirk Dickla

        No, they just like to marry little girls.

      • Pezski

        No rape statistics, not the same thing bro

    • Ironic

      It's ironic that Americans make fun of another culture for censoring the female body, considering you can't even see boobs on network TV in the US. After the Middle East, the US is probably the 2nd worst violator.

      • Boogie

        Couldn't agree more. You have an accidental nipple slip on television and the entire country goes nuts for a month. Someone needs to get laid…. I'm looking at you, the US.

        • The Spicy Italian

          Hey thats not my choice

      • nnnnnnn

        But Australia doesn't allow A cup porn because it promotes pedophilia, Japan blurs genitalia, and Germany has to have an approved doctor on set. Different parts of the world treat it differently. deal with it.

    • Nicnac

      Based on this thread? Any ultra-conservative religion would do the same. If you are referring to something else, remember, the US is directly responsible for the deaths of tens of thousands of Iraqis behind the guise of spreading freedom. Who are the savages?

      • http://www.facebook.com/acasinas Alfred Casinas Jr

        hmm you know, the post and Apollos' reply is about censorship in the mid east, and i think he's just kidding around.. chill out

    • test

      and yet the USA initiates wars all over the world and kills innocent civilians…… yeah I see who are the savages.

      • Libertariandude

        Dont tell me: you hail from Latin America. Hello from a paisano, and also… ERES UN RESENTIDO SOCIAL!!!!


    I take it Hustler isn't a huge seller over there.

    • F-U

      Only for the articles.

    • Clint

      actually it's illegal…..

    • seniorsplitwig

      just ask any US Soldier about butt fuck tuesday in afganistan. can have an un coverd women but the boys are ripe for the fuckin. goddamned savages. if they where in the jugles of south america or the deserts of africa we would be studying them for the unevolved cavemen that they are.

  • Mikey


    • DaddyD

      Mom in a bathing suit was covered up.

    • Blake

      It's just an advertisement for ninja floaties

      • Grim

        Nah, half naked little girls are okay with Muhammad.

        • JMikeH

          He did marry a nine year old.

          • commenter

            and what is wrong with that? he married her legally.

    • poe

      There's your kid smilling, having fun, when suddenly a fu*king ninja appears and kills you all,

  • http://www.facebook.com/paul.w.musselman Paul Musselman

    These are horrible crimes against humanity!!

  • Nazz1962

    I bet they'd have a field day with the Chivettes!

    • SteveySteveSteve

      The Chive should send some of those govt's a link to the Friday posts. No way anyone could even jokingly suggest they cover up, much less use photoshop to cover them up. Is it Friday yet?

      • Nazz1962

        Lol very true!

    • ROK247

      for a lot of them gals it would take several sharpies worth to cover everything up daaaaaang!

  • ReginaFilange

    #7 They came knocking on my door yesterday. I tried to shut the door but they kept trying to sell me something.

  • n1ghtstalker

    I thank the sun the moon and everything else that I do not live in these places.
    Life must be soo boring!

    • V4Vendetta14

      Oppressing women does fill out the day.

    • Trogdor

      It is, dude.. some of us are trying to get out but its too damn hard 🙂

    • fsdc

      bombs going off and fighting for rations of food would be dull

  • ROK247

    i can't see the jesus post WHAT GIVES?

    nvm it's gone. i guess the arabs aren't the only ones censoring shit out there.

    • Guppies

      I can't believe they took the Jesus post down for this crap! What gives, chive?

      • budmancometh

        Right, so what must one do to get the Chive to censor on their behalf? Is it like China and I just slip you some cash under the table? Or do I have to be a paying advertiser on your site and threaten to pull my funds? Or do I have to just sit back and insult a 2000 year old superstition?ahhh, wait that's what this post is….now I'm confused?!

        Frankly, I find your pimping of that shit site The Brigade much more appalling and insulting. really, we don't care how big your gun, (overcompensate much!)

    • Jesus

      you must believe

    • HappyCat

      Chive I am dissapoint …. You guys should have more balls…

    • Pedobear

      Most importantly, that is an accurate portrayal of deleted bibel stories: http://www.cracked.com/article_18948_5-real-delet

    • V4Vendetta14

      Personally, I think all religion deserves some humorous satirical analysis. But Christians don't seem to murder people after it is done…so I can't imagine why the Jesus cartoons would be taken down. We've seen most of them on this site before anyway…

    • reme

      I really don't think it was ONLY due to the fact that it was 'jesus'. If that post was 20 pictures of Conan OBrian, and every shot had the caption, "Conan's an Asshole"…. enough people would complain that they'd take it down too- even though Conan IS an asshole.

  • http://www.videocopilot.net andrew

    girls and women are not toys for men
    they r angels
    most of you enjoy when u see a girl without clothes…if she does't respect herself then we will make her(and thats applied on men as well)
    the reason is simple…..ethics and ethics…this will make us better people
    and this is not my opinion…this is a fact…

    • Orangey

      Where to begin…

      If "girls and women are not toys for men", why are you trying to impose your will on them?

      "if she doesn't respect herself" and you can tell that by how she dresses??

      "we will make her", not your life, not your mind, not your business.

      "ethics, ethics" is in the eyes and mind of the beholder and is not some universal rule.

      "and this is not my opinion…this is a fact…". No. This is your opinion. This is NOT fact.

    • JstevensF

      Didn't Hitler have a similar opinion about making us all 'better people'?

      • ROK247

        not all of us lol

        (i'm referring to the fact that i would NOT have been one of the ones included)

        • fsdc

          thats cos you are a cat lol

    • Honey Bone


      Honestly, Don`t you just love titties? C'mon…..Relax!

      They're titiies!

    • BaJezzus

      You know Andrew…it's the whole part where you say, "…then WE will MAKE her" that really doesn't sit well with most people. If you don't like it, then by all means, DON"T FUCKING BUY IT!! DON"T LOOK AT IT!!! DON"T TALK ABOUT IT!!! and then you can't be offended by it, because you wouldn't even know it was there. And who is the "WE" anyway? You're group of uptight oppressors? Fascists? General goody two-shoe conservatives that wouldn't know a good time if it slapped them in the face.

      Either way, you are obviously a chiver, so don't come on here with your high and mighty BS. Keep your ideological views to yourself please. kthanks.

      • cantkillcastro

        why do goody two shoes have to be conservatives? I'm conservative, and I absolutely adore titties! just because I don't believe in a liberal agenda doesn't mean I sit in my house, clinging to my bible and my gun.

    • MoistSnuff

      WOW! "We will make her." I agree with the rest of these replies your comment is bullshit! Nobody has the right to make someone do anything! And that my friend is what America is founded on FREEDOM! That includes freedom of choice. It's thinking like yours that ruins this country and brainwashes people into thinking we need people or government to tell us what to wear, drive, how to raise our kids etc…. It's choice!!!

    • DaddyD

      I attended a conference in the Middle East where a guy from Saudi Arabia was berating a guy from Bahrain for having booze and broads available to tempt the Saudis. The Bahraini listened patiently, then said, "No one makes them come to my country. No one makes them drink. No one ties them down, holds their eyelids open with toothpicks, and forces them to look at women in short skirts."

      You do your thing. I'll do mine. I can enjoy an attractive woman without considering her a toy. A woman can be proud of her body without being a slut.

    • Ryan

      Can we just agree that this guy is a douche tool and move on? I want to have a good day filled with scantily clad women on the Chive. It's hump day for christ's sake!

    • Haterade

      Best troll on the chive in years. well done andrew

      • DaddyD

        You could be right …

        • andrew

          what i mean by (we will make her) is in the picture
          no one has the right to force other people
          even in arabic countaries you can dress whatever you want no one will force you
          however, you have to respect these culture and their way of thinking
          and most of you are angry specially that Orangey coz they can't see xxx ….this makes no sense

          • Don Mambo


          • ANDREW IS HITLER


          • Orangey

            I'm sorry to be the one to tell you this Andrew, but you are the one making no sense here!

            I'm not angry about what I can or cannot see in a magazine, i'm concerned you know nothing about women and have decided that you need to force people to see what YOU deem to be appropriate. It's called censorship. These ideas are what limit the amount of freedom people have and encourage some weird, fucked up ideas about sex, relationships and women generally.

            And have you been to the U.A.E. recently? Forced to dress or act in a certain way? Saudi Arabia? Have a google, get some facts.

            One last thing that tells me you know nothing about women…

            "they r angels"…


            I love my GF but….Angel?? 😛

            Anyways, you're eating into my valuable DAR browsing time…CHIVE ON!

    • Klara-fi

      haha I has nothing to do with being toys for men. Im a girl and know other girls who like showing a little skin. And other peoples in ability to deal with skin is NOT OUR PROBLEM.!

  • Iran_Cyber_Army

    I remember being in Dubai and seeing a magazine with Emma Watson on the front cover. White sticker slabs. …White….Sticker….slabs….were blocking her groin and her legs. Why?

    • Gabriel Burgi

      …because Trannies are not allowed in Dubai.

    • rishabhpb

      I dunno if that was recent or where in Dubai you saw that, but you can go into any bookstore where they sell the women' mags and find that they are uncensored.

  • Call You Out

    Chive, I can't believe you caved to the self-righteous and took down the Jesus post. For shame. I guess advertising dollars are more important to you than anything else.

    Keep it safe with T & A boys.

    • Haterade

      what is this jesus post? I missed it. bullshit. total bullshit.

      • Haterade

        it was apparently just that "hey tell them about that time I fought a dragon" "that didn't happen jesus" "well tell them anyways lol." thing. it is old. probably took it down cause it has been seen by the entire internets

      • MattFoley

        Gonna post the same thing I posted above:

        It goes from 1 to 19. Just replace the number at the end to see all of them.

  • Iran_Cyber_Army

    #13 Looks like the ladies have a black hole on their chest. As if all things impure and too revealing would be sucked into that hole back to the western dimension.

  • houtini

    Are these actual pictures of magazines sold in the middle east? Do they employ people to flick through the pages and go at it with a black marker, or is this "manually shooped" before print? Makes a big difference, so I'd be interested to know.

    • Iran_Cyber_Army

      With these pictures, they are all printed like this and some of these pictures don't seem to be actual pictures, especially #2, which also says 'edit' which would never be in a magazine. Hope that helps.

  • Reme

    Shouldn't Scooby have photoshopped pants, too?

    • MARK

      they engage in beastiality.

  • me I myself

    Thank you for having balls. This is hilarious. I wish more people had balls like you to call out this type of ridiculousness.
    Also, on the Scooby-Doo one, owning Scooby would be outlawed because Iran just made it illegal to own a dog.

    • bdiddley

      ironic to acclaim them for said had balls, when they're caving and pulling other posts that could upset some mentally challenged superstitious folk.

    • et phone home

      arabs=/= iranians. They fucking hate each other

    • Laughable

      Balls? LOL. This site only picks on cultures other than their own. With all this talk of censorship, you'd think Sexy Chivers would be a nude pix post, but it isn't… not even close. In fact, they wear more than a typical Brazilian beach on a Tuesday afternoon, and still this is thought as "pushing the limit." Give me a break, in most places in the world sex and nudity isn't nearly as taboo as it is in America.

      • R2-D2

        Have you never seen any of their "'Merica" posts?

  • http://al-3jeeb.blogspot.com/ الــعــجــيــب

    imagine how thechive will be different if it get censored

    • bdiddley

      looks like we're on the way now

  • krAm

    I hope this is a technical issue and it will reappear shortly, because taking it down in response to the blithering of idiots is more wrong than the post ever could be.
    If you can laugh at one group of people, you should be able to laugh at them all. And I do. Heartily

    • Iran_Cyber_Army

      Wow, I just noticed its gone and that's not fair. You guys joke about asians and their disability to name shops correctly and this as well. And I bet the list keeps going. Why? That post shouldn't have been taken seriously since it was an annoying trolling jesus. This is sofa king a bummer to me.

    • JstevensF

      Chive I'm upset you've now bottled it and took down the Jesus post. You're non discriminate picking on everyone and everything is part of what makes this site so brilliant. Bring it back.

    • That Guy

      i know. makes me feel like those extremist douches that kill people for drawing muhammad.

    • lidalida

      So… You can mock Arabs but not Christians? What the fuck, Chive. What the fuck.

    • Whatev

      The Chive is oftentimes racist and clearly has a pro-Christian and pro-American agenda.

      Making fun of everyone else but themselves.

    • mashplum

      It wasn't funny or even commentary on Christianity. It was just Jesus saying douchey stuff and a bunch of people saying "Fuck off, Jesus." I was clearly designed to offend Christians and has no other purpose. Chive doesn't need to post pure hate.

  • sirforsyth

    #20 She should get that mole checked out.

  • Mr_Rob

    That would had been a way funnier April fools day joke: "The Chive: now with a new arab administration"

  • Agronomyguy

    Thanks for posting. Got here to late to see what all the fuss was about. As a Christian, I found them funny. Some people can't take a joke.

    • Agronomyguy


    • MattFoley

      Same thing here. God gave us sense of humour, we should use it.

      Loved the one about the dragon.

      • God

        I don't exist.

        • busted

          ::yawn:: Been done.

          • Snoob

            As has your mom, but you don't see me complaining.

  • HollarPeenYo

    CHIVE you put that Jesus post back up! Don't you be a sell out!!! That shit was funny and you know it…

    • Iran_Cyber_Army

      Join the club HollarPeenYo. krAm thinks so too

  • Marc

    Hey Chive,
    you can not make fun of one group (Arabs) of people and not of the other (Jesus lovers).
    That would be called harassment!

    • Htisss

      I have seen plenty of pic poking fun at Christians, aka Jesus lovers. Now there hasn't been, to my knowledge, one post solely dedicated to that topic.

      As for the pics…I thought they were well done. Very subtle, difficult to see how the photos where changed.

      • lol

        Please reference at least 3 posts making fun of Christians, following your statement. Good luck finding them. Want me to reference posts making fun of other cultures? See the vast majority of Chive content.

  • davisrj

    #4 I respect peoples beliefs and I have no problem with them believing this is necessary. If thats how they want to live fine let them but why did they have to erase the I love NY on her shirt? Thats just being an ass!!!

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