The life of a Tyrannosaurus Rex is one of constant struggle. Everyday, these beautiful creatures try and fail to do things most of us take for granted. Like clap hands. Or put an arm around a loved one. Or furiously masturbate to Jurassic Park.
Just watch as this T-Rex tries in vain to shovel his balcony during a fierce blizzard.
But T-Rexes like this one shouldn’t have to suffer. With your help, they won’t have to.
For just five cents a day, you could pay for a pair of arms for a T-Rex in need. For just five cents a day, a T-Rex could hug its child or wipe its asshole for the first time.
What are you waiting for? Right now, thousands of T-Rexes are forced to walk around with dirty, unwiped assholes. Help us put an end to dirty, unwiped T-rex assholes once and for all. Call 1-800-REX-ARMS to make your donation now. Please.