A little inspiration goes a long way (30 Photos)

  • owyeah


    • DaddyD

      Please follow the advice in #7

      • quikson

        haha! i see what you did there

    • Blumpkin

      Success usually comes to those who are too busy to be looking for it.

      Henry David Thoreau

  • Hero_ofthe_Day

    #20 Noted, Hemingway.

    • Wanna B. Poe

      Seems about right from my experience.

      • Catalyst

        Instead of booze, use coke. It's quicker.

    • Underbaker

      But by the time I'm drunk I can no longer convince myself to write.

    • mihaisuzuki

      I wonder if hemingway was sober that day…Or everyday

  • hey guy

    not first!

  • Gaz

    I'm so so happy the Chive is back up and running, for a 25 year old dude without a girlfriend and haven't bought Skyrim yet my Christmas holidays off work are a very lonely time on the internet

    • Ian

      you should by skyrim then or get a girl, preferably a girl

      • CHIPBUTY


      • oliverklosov

        Skyrim is a great deal cheaper…though.

    • Just Sayin'

      If you're having chive problems I feel bad for you son,
      I dodged 99 arrows but the knee took one.

      • Ramrod

        You win!

    • you lose

      Your Average Chiver.

    • Paul from the gump

      A very ironic place to post this comment. Here is some advice:

      Go to your front door.

      Open it.

      Step out.

      See what happens.

      • Real American Ass

        I got beat up by the kids out of school for the holidays last time i did that… they are so small but they are like the little Compsognathus from Jurassic Park… in large groups they tear there prey apart

  • whyme1973

    #1 Great advice.
    #19 I know of a few bosses that need to read and understand this one.

  • chicago

    #2 agreed. A great little book: A Man Who Mistook His Wife for a Hat. Oliver Sacks.

    • blub_glub

      Another great book: The Alchemist, Paulo Coelho.

      • chicago

        "The Alchemist" interesting summary. Thank you. I suppose I'll buy it and give it a read come one cold winters day.

        I prefer psychology subjects for instance: The Mind of a Mnemonist. A. R. Luria [shorty book]

        • http://www.facebook.com/ross.kalmbach Ross Kalmbach

          The Alchemist is a pretty good book, I would suggest the library though due to its length, unless you want to gift it after the short time it will take you to finish.

          • chicago

            good idea: a good read, and a re-gift. Thx

  • brian!

    #11 i treat women as holes

    • frankus

      which is why your hand is your best friend

    • Doc Arkham

      I'm willing to bet women treat you as a-hole too.

  • Damian

    Jesus I hate these sayings, basically anyone can write something inspiring and it’s all crap. And Marilyn Monroe? I mean come on her quote should be I’m a big ole’ whore and will die of an OD if you can’t handle that you’re probably a better person.

    • Noegod

      Hey buddy, why don’t you put your money where your mouth is and see if you can’t churn out some real wisdom of your own? What’s that? You got nothing? Then shut the fuck up and stop judging others! Even a greeting card can keep a person from committing suicide so long as they open their heart to it! It doesn’t matter where it comes from, the truth is eternally beautiful, something a pessimist will never understand.

      • Jak

        You should have saved that gem for your tombstone epitaph

        • Redundant

          Just realized I didn't really need both those words at the end.

  • brian!

    haha i treat women as holes

  • misschris

    #26 You know… that's a good question.

    • Kak

      then I remember it's expensive as fuck and airports are full of assholes

  • maggiemay13

    #30 Ended it on such a lovely note.

    • chicago

      Love kindled by virtue always kindles another, provided that its flame appear outwardly.
      The Divine Comedy. Dante Alighieri

      [for those who read this book, Dante had sex with his perfect Angel [Beatrice] and she treats him like a one night stand in the morning. funny]

      • chris

        Fucking spoilers dude

        • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=163904325 Steven Barber

          You have literally had your entire life to read that book.

          "Wasn't that crazy when Goose dies int Top Gun?"
          "I haven't seen it yet asshole! Spoiler alert!"

          • Jack_LeMac

            January 3rd, 2012: the day Steven met sarcasm

    • deathscythe257

      Couldnt agree more.

    • Damien

      I find it weird that Dumbledore is credited for this. J.K. Rowling's maybe?

  • cantcme

    #17 Occupy Wall Street

    • Mason420

      tea party

      • Guile

        Yup… Tea party

        • It's420Somewhere

          Geez. You must be quite the mental powerhouse

    • Jim

      I mean, even though I agree with the underlying goal of the movement, I have to agree with you here.

    • ZachBob


  • gem

    I know so many people who need to read this. Keep it up chive!

  • dfoggers

    I feel inspired already. Time to go get drunk.

  • http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=FL1ygFHhz8lZUjMBVsYHEVXA Lyrmat

    #9 reminds me how life can be fragile. Carpe Diem

    • JerkFace

      Not herpes!

  • MikeBedlam

    #7 Where's a Republican to be made fun of when you need one?

    I kid. I love you guys. Half of my laughs on a daily basis come from politicians.

  • etcrr

    #23 is very true

  • MacTheLad

    Great post. Needed this today.

  • xXbeermonkeyXx

    #7 for all the trolls in the audience

    • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

      But then, since you don't get the trolls, that means #7 does in fact… apply to you.

      – # 1 commenter of 2012

      • xXbeermonkeyXx

        who says i dont get the trolls? oh dear Paula_, that was bait and you bit down soooo hard…! thus proving my point 😀
        cheers, beers

  • ITR


    Not a truer word was spoken!!

    • Tyst Jak

      If you are anxious and depressed, does that mean you are also living in the present?

  • SolidusSnake420

    All thinking men are atheists – Hemingway

    • Underbaker

      All atheists think they are men – Me
      Laughter, Crying, and that feeling you get when you do good things for other people, explain that with your evolutionary theory's.

      • SolidusSnake420

        I could explain those things, but being as you won't listen to it at all I will not waste my time. What I will point out however is that, if indeed that is your tattoo in that picture, not to mention if you smoke herb as your name hints to me, being a pothead and all, is in a direct violation of the old testament, leviticus 19:28 if you were wondering. Good job!

        • Underbaker

          I actually listen well (or read as this is a written forum). The Tattoo is not mine, just liked the logo of Jack wearing a Chefs hat. The name is more of a play on wrestling and cooking (food not drugs). So now you will probably say I am a redneck who believes rassl'n is real, I really just enjoyed watching them play the crowd. Most of the laws from Leviticus were pertinent at the time (i.e. tattoos lead to deadly infections and spoiled food killed people), many of them still make great sense, but I look at the Old Testament as more of a history book and try to live more like Jesus taught. Simply Love God and Love others as yourself, it gets deeper then that but you need to find your center somewhere.

          • SolidusSnake420

            To love others included saying atheists just think they are men? Implying they are not? And isn't there something about not judging others? And by the way it wasn't about infection, it was about putting the Jews of the old testament higher than the savage tribe peoples, that's why in the same passage it says to not cut their slob in mourning of the dead.

            • SolidusSnake420

              Skin not slob

            • Underbaker

              And you implied that by not being an atheist that I don't think. Did you miss that word "try", I am a man who is also a sinner, if I was already like Jesus then I wouldn't need him. Lucky for me that God loves us despite our flaws. By the way I am still waiting on that explanation you said you can give. Think I proved I would listen to it by sticking with it.

              • SolidusSnake420

                The evolutionary cause for crying is simple, seeing someone crying makes you want to help that person and make them stop crying, reason being simply a chemical reaction that occurs in all humans that stems from babies crying, its instinct to make it stop. When you do good things for people, it helps the same species as you, advancing the species to evolve from nomadic small tribes to towns to cities and gor doing this our brains give us a reward. Laughter, while ill admit its mostly a mystery, follows the same line as the helping people, as we live in larger and larger communities the social aspects of our brain had to evolve as well, and its not just humans that laugh.

                • Underbaker

                  On crying it also cleans dirt from our eyes, but I was thinking more along the lines of the end of "Old Yeller" or more recently "Marley and Me", there is no child or adult you can fix here. On doing good for others it also works with helping animals so the species thing is out and I know it is a chemical reaction, but I am asking why we would have such a chemical reaction programed into us, seems to me a survival instinct would be purely selfish. Here is another thing to throw in the pot, I am approaching a light that just turned red in the right lane and people could turn right even if the light is red so I change lanes to the left lane to let some stranger have the possibility of turning right on the red light, I have no thought or possibility of reward from this, why would I do it?

                  • SolidusSnake420

                    We feel in this world we are superior to animals, so in helping animals we are helping something we feel is inferior and we think we did good for that animal so you get a reward. And how can you think survival instinct is selfish? I can't even put a number to the amount of animals that live in, schools, pods, troops, packs, prides and so on. And the red light thing, its called courtesy why wouldn't someone do that?

                    • Underbaker

                      But the animals that live in packs, pods, troops care for their young but not for the lame or infirm or elderly, they are culled from the pack and left for the predators. Only humans have that save everyone attitude. Maybe it is me just getting old, but how come there is so much less courtesy today then lets say 20 years ago? My theory is less belief in a higher authority breeds less fear of any retaliation, thus you have people who also have less respect for others. I am interested in what your theory might be.

                    • Underbaker

                      will have to catch these answers later (maybe tomorrow) my workday is done (didn't want you waiting for an answer).

                    • SolidusSnake420

                      We have no predators, that's why. If there was a species of giant frog that ate people, you had better believe the old or sick would be their food. My theory for less courtesy is simple, people are detached, my guess is due to tv, internet, all that sort of shit. Authority and fear of retaliation is also my theory for why religion exists as we know it, something to control the people so they don't ask questions cause if they do god will punish them. There can be no argument that religious bodies have impeded so much good and helped so much wrong in history that there can be no other explanation in my mind.

                    • Underbaker

                      Ouch, pull out a nuke there and blame religion for all the worlds problems. I admit that religion has been misused by those in power, but those in power will use any resource available to achieve their objectives. You seem to forget all the good it does provide, feeding the hungry, sheltering the homeless, providing most of the relief efforts to those in need from natural disasters, wars, or just bad leadership. But this is all kind of running astray of the original topic. I look out a window or under a microscope and say how can there not be an intelligent design here? Especially emotions, they can be the most useless things that bring about the greatest gifts. I think if it was up to evolution then we would all be like ideal Vulcans or even the flip side and be warring Klingons.

                  • SolidusSnake420

                    I have something to throw in as well. You are at a bus stop alone at night, a group of ten men come walking towards you, would you be more or less afraid to know these men came from a prayer meeting?

                    • Underbaker

                      My initial thought would be less afraid, but then I thought you might be trying to trap me and wondered about it being a trick question, so what kind of prayer meeting was it?

                    • SolidusSnake420

                      Very good, it is a trick question, to me it is meant to show that people in general, belief in a god or no, can be good or bad largely based on their surroundings, which is adapting, which adaptations lead to evolving. Bottom line is, to me is evolution makes way more sense than the idea of a creator, also I feel its less fun in life to "know" answers that make no sense about the origin of the cosmos and life on this planet. It seems that you think quite the opposite, which by no means do I not respect your thoughts on the subject or necessarily want to change them.

                    • Jake

                      This is a really good debate, although you both used Ad hominem's to start off with it turned into something worth reading! Thank you, restored some of my faith in humanity.

                    • Underbaker

                      I like to "know" the answers too, after all in my way of thinking God created Science as well and gave us a great many mysteries to solve. Just because I believe there was an intelligent design to the universe doesn't mean I don't want to know how he did it. It has been fun having a chat with you, sorry for bailing out on it yesterday, had to go get my daughters from school and I try to stay away from the computer at home to have a life with my family.

    • Not the sharpest

      Just because a man is famous and thinks doesn't make him right. I am a thinking man and I am NOT an athiest.

      • fnaah

        think harder.

  • MrHappy

    A couple corrections:
    1. Life isn't art, life is life. Art is about life. Of course, if your life consists of thinking that everything you do is art, then your life, and the art that would be about your life would kind of be the same thing – you would be a navel-contemplating hipster creating a portrait of a navel-contemplating hipster.
    2. If you are at peace you live in the past, anxious you live in the future, and depressed, you live in the present.
    3. You may not actually have a mission here on earth to complete, other than scrolling theChive.

    • Brutal Deluxe

      There's nothing left but to remove your pants and address Congress directly.

  • SolidusSnake420

    The desires of the heart are as crooked as corkscrews, Not to be born is the best for man; The second-best is a formal order, The dance's pattern; dance while you can.

    Dance, dance for the figure is easy, The tune is catching and will not stop; Dance till the stars come down from the rafters; Dance, dance, dance till you drop.

    W.H. Auden

    • for real

      dumbest thing I have ever heard

  • SolidusSnake420

    We are going to die, and that makes us the lucky ones. Most people are never going to die becausethey are never going to be born. – Richard Dawkins

    • Stymied

      Thats retarded

  • MigraineBoy

    #12 #17 So true.

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