People with tans like these need an intervention (34 Photos)

Via Paleisthenewtan

  • Luke


    • Oltimey

      And as the first poster. You win….fuck all. congrats!

    • Eli

      Who the fuck cares ?

      • Luke 1st

        you do.. enough to come and comment on it.. thank you fellow chiver KEEP CALM is the main theme here SO CALM THE FUCK DOWN and go see more hump

    • andy021

      • Luke

        That's what I should have said.

        • Cecil

          No Ma'am, you should have announced your unquenchable urge to commit suicide.

    • LukeTheTerrible

      Hey, you're not terrible, so what are you doing here?

    • JohnD

      Good thing non of these douche-bags is wearing a CHIVE t-Shirt


    #9 Kill It!!! Kill IT!!!!!

  • EasternCanuck

    #3 these guys need to stop brown nosing bad!!!

    • mike

      this is the scariest post i've seen in quite some time

    • Marion Arter Campbell

      where these guys walking too close to their leader when he made a sudden stop? Damn!!!

    • Naggert

      Lol I know these two fags IRL.. They work out in the same gym as I. They smell like piss and vinegar

  • MarthaJeane

    #10 I don't even know where to begin with this one…


      at the barrel of a shotgun is a good starting point.

      • F3n1x187

        Then a little napalm!

    • sean

      I'll try, we need to get Bill f-ing Murray and the rest of the Ghostbusters to blast this monstrosity back into his painting.

      • MarthaJeane

        THAT'S what it reminds me of! I couldn't put my finger on it, but that's it!

      • F3n1x187

        They'll have to cross streams from the start

    • tapsnapornap

      Poses like, has long hair like, duckfaces like, wears low cut pink top, bracelets and white belt…all like a girl. That's where I'd start.

    • Johnny K.

      This looks like a profile picture for a dating service that caters to mentally challenged Umpa-Lumpas…

      Epic Fail all around…

      • Andy

        Gummo all grown up.

    • Matt

      What is this?

    • mattythegooch

      About 8 seconds away from the "Silence of the Lambs dance"…..I'd fuck me…

      • Muad-dib

        Exactly…"It rubs the lotion on."

    • Ray

      I thought this was just an ugly as woman….then i looked again, don't ask me why, and to my amazement it's just a girly looking douche.

    • Wesley Windsor

      Is that the South Beach version of Balon Greyjoy?

    • Humps4ever

      Zoolander wannabe must be sooo popular with the ladies;)

      • banananah

        Zoolander is the normal one here, come on! First of all he did not use nutella. And that settles it.

    • spaniard

      sidney lee, danish douche big big time….. had his own reality show, he is one character !

      • Marty

        "It puts the lotion on it's skin or it gets the hose again" – squeeeeeeeeeeeee

    • Peter Haag Vestergaard Johansen

      is so embarrassing to be Danish when I see this picture .. : (
      if i want to see more of the same person then search for sidney lee on google

    • Andreas!

      HA! He's a danish reality star called Sidney lee!

    • Bob

      I don't even know where to start with the whole bunch. The tanning beds must effect your vision. These people are fuckin blind.

    • Fuzzreal

      Is this a guy or girl!!! That tanning has this person all jacked up!!

    • Naggert

      Lol it's a female Klingon!

    • stacygturner



    #20 WTF?

    • sean

      when does dip-shit tanning transform into racist black-face?

    • Prune

      They told me I could become anything.. So I became an African.

    • mutant26

      dude…someone should have told you that the color of shit is not a tanning color. "chocolate" does not look right on a white dude.

    • francesco

      he is the hell did he become GREY???

    • pat

      fuck the tan. whats up with his girls leg?

    • Jr.

      HAHHAAHAHAHAHAHA… my soul died just a little bit more after this

  • upy3rz

    Need to start a bonfire with this pile of WTF.

    • noegod

      I would say "Kill it, kill it with fire!" except that they're all probably immune!

  • B!!!

    Fake tanning is a disease . Please donate a dollar to the "bullets for bad tans association" . It'll only take a minute of your time. Please… Save humanity

    • .30cal

      I'd like to volunteer for dispensing the bullets.

  • ryax44

    #21 sooooo sick!!! #24 straight out of willy wonka's factory!!!!

    • nice guy eddie

      #21 – i'd still hit it…

  • LucretiusCarus

    #6 Does she come in a handbag version?

    • Scotty C

      thing is without the black face she would actually be attractive

      • Marion Arter Campbell

        anyone know for sure that she wasn't caught in a bad fireworks accident or something?

  • Unfkngblvbl

    Every one of these photos actually made my stomach turn.

  • tv_paul


    So is he dating a Oompa Loompa, sex & chocolate.

    • Cali_Dude

      Like the Eddie Murphy performer from coming to America "Sexual Chocolate" 🙂

    • theging!

      missing the green hair sadly.

    • Jr.

      how fucked does your mind have to be to think "I look good!" looking like a medium-well steak?

  • mase

    wtf kill em allaa

  • mid13

    nuke them please!

    • rich

      i think they are doing a good job of nuking themselves.

    • Ripley

      I say we take off and nuke the entire site from orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.

  • ryax44

    #34 umpa lumpa

    • Marion Arter Campbell

      aaaaahhhh RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!!

  • Le Derp

    None of these people deserve to live. Kill it, kill it with fire!

    • Cat

      don't woory .. most of them will be dying of cancer pretty soon anyway .. HRHRHR

    • john

      killing with fire wouldnt work with their leathery burnt skin…….

  • @unicornsRnice

    #9 #10 and #11 Remind me that God abandoned us a long time ago

    • Catalystika

      The first thing that came to mind when I saw #11 was "Kill it! Kill it with fire!"

    • Marion Arter Campbell

      This is Gods way of sayin "repent you aragant bastards, or you will all look like this!"

  • Todd

    …think im gonna go throw myself off my balcony…

  • Ned_Plimpton

    A lot of these people's issues go beyond a hideous tan… #10 Yikes!

    • Optimus_prime

      Honestly couldn't tell if it was a really ugly man, or a really ugly woman

  • clenis

    An amazing amount of douchery in this one. #10

  • LucretiusCarus

    Some are clearly 'shopped. Like #28, for one.

    • Ovla

      You underestimate people.

      • Cali_Dude

        With all due respect, I think he is overestimating people.

    • Reeko

      Black Face! Thats Racist!

    • Indy Chivette

      Not shopped
      That's Amber from Mtv 16 & Pregnate…she was all over our local news because she beat the crap out of her boyfriend.

    • LEG

      I think it's shopped too, definitely Amber from Teen Mom. It makes me sad that I know that.

  • Gregory

    White folks are hilarious.

    • Johnny K.

      THAT'S RACIST!!!

      Wait a sec… Nope… He's right… White folks are hilarious… And from the looks of it, slightly retarded too…

    • John Bocanegra

      You said it.

    • Cali_Dude

      Indeed we are some funny funny people. However, I would never dip myself in carmel like these folks.

  • roly

    At first I was like, "Damn, that's a pretty good tan!"

    • Urethra Franklin

      His Girl's tan is pretty good too

    • Bill-Braskey

      JAY-Z? Maybe JAY-Z's brother

    • SMitty

      And then i was like… Nah, thats just jiggaman

    • Plurp

      Yikes. That broad tried to use a ruler to draw on her eyebrows.

    • Frank M

      That dude might actually be black…

  • Ovla

    #28 That's racist.

    • Blahblahblah

      Oompa loompa!!!! Yikes

    • Lesley J. Bruce

      I think the point is he black she aint but she so tan she looks it…or u is just casual racism…

  • Ruffieg

    Should have called this one "dark side of the Douche"

    • Spork

      Is there a light side to being a douche? I thought it was all just… dark. …so very dark…

      • MusicMan

        you idiot……his comment was in reference to 'The Who's' album "Dark side of the Sun".
        what a bloody wanker you are

        • Spork

          Whoa, chill out, dude. I understood the joke just fine. That was not said in criticism of what he said.

        • The_Hellequin

          I thought of Pink Floyd's song "Brain Damage" when I read that, myself. It fits, doesn't it?

  • Blame_anxiety

    In a few years, they are all going to look 20 years older than they actually are.

    • XOXO

      Maybe but not because of the tan, it's all fake (except the poor bastards with the sunburns).

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