Please, let me help you (30 Photos)

It's okay. He has you stored in his phone as "Booty call."

That has to mean something, right?

You can friend me on Facebook!

I'd let you have sex with me and be my facebook friend!

It probably means you're bat-shit crazy.

thats not good. you shouldntt be having sex with him then your far to pretty for something like that go out there and find someone amazing! you gots this!

Call me maybe?

No facebook, no problem.

Aaaaaaand… Facebook found

fyi, if you troll comments on porn sites instead of chive you'd probs get more attention

His loss.

I'd friend you… you'd have to talk to my wife about the other stuff though.

I might have some context for that one, actually. The patch on his arm is 1st Infantry Division; some of them just did training at Ft. Polk, LA to prepare for a deployment. This is either them busing there or back, impossible to tell which. And since the bus ride is 16-22 hrs long in seats not deisgned for sleeping…

I was there myself, roleplaying for their field exercises. Just did the bus ride back to my post.

God, I wish I had thought of what he's doing.

This should really be removed. Child abuse isn't funny. If someone put him in there on purpose, that's horrible. If he climbed in and was crying for help to get out, and the parent took a picture first, that parent is similarly an asshole.

Why is their bath tub being used as a storage space?

Which part? When you walk into the bathroom and you find there's a kid that's exploded out of your toilet? Or when you turn your bathtub on and an office from the 80's pours out?

It's a common rule for hospital employees. Not sure why it's funny. If it had read "herro", that would have been funny.

This needs to go on that new duck meme.

Yea, that will keep the shell from breaking because of squeezing.

This is definitely a kid having perk. Beats the hell out of the crab walk of shame.

Anyone else notice the different skin color between her hand and face?

Me too…so I think this one needs some explanation.

It's a sailboat!

So did I.

Just order one pizza with pepperoni's and one plain. Very dry humor. Yeah, the code is the joke.

hahahhaha, your stupid

I supposed it would be, just because you could have bought one whole pepperoni pie, and one whole cheese pie..? And the redemption code is w's and v's, which looks confusing? wwvwwvwvwvvwwv

Try figuring out that redemption code.

You solve it, you keep it, IMO.