Daily Afternoon Randomness (49 Photos)

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  • davis

    #28

    Your tush deserves the Medal of Honor

    • truth

      wow… what a great ass. your man will literally kill to get back to you! I would.

    • Angry Kid

      I am sure your boyfriend is super excited about you posting your ass for millions of people to see. Now that's commitment to one another!

    • Content Young Adult

      All these girls posting pics of themselves half naked "for their boyfriend to see while he's away" must not have heard of email and/or text messaging.

      • its_forge

        I take it we're unfamiliar with the concept of "I've got a hot girlfriend, this is what she looks like and she's NOT YOURS" then?

        • Angry Kid

          I take it you're still creepy and still stalking the fuck out of my comments somehow even though I change my name every damn day.

          • Angry Kid

            why'd you steal my name dude? not cool

            • Angry Kid

              One cannot steal something which belonged to them to begin with. Angry since 2009.

              • lurker

                But I'm angry now and have been since 2008! Zing

          • its_forge

            You're here to respond to absolutely everything and anything I say, and you change your name regularly, but *I'm* the creep. I think you have it backward. No, I know you have it backward.

            • None

              You are a dirty old man, supposedly with kids, who creeps around a website looking at photos of young girls and makes the creepiest comments about them, which not only I, but many other people, have noticed. Be less creepy. I don't need a profile on here like some of you losers because I don't give a shit what people think about my comments, but clearly you do, which makes you even that much creepier.

              • its_forge

                No, these same comments come from the same person, namely you. No one else gives a fuck which is the way it should be, because really, who *should* give a fuck? I am not a "dirty old man." I am a grown man who appreciates feminine beauty. My comments aren't creepy they're complimentary. The *women* about whom I comment, who happen to read what I say, have all said "Aw, why thank you" and specifically *not* "OMG get away from me you creep." Somehow I still think the dozen or so teenage pricks that post the same "FAP FAP FAP FAP FAP" over and over again in every post are just a leeeeeeeeeettle bit creepier than my saying someone's got a cute bottom. I don't give a flying fuck about a profile, I just signed up when the comment system changed over to IntenseDebate because I thought that was the only way you could post. *You* only pick on me because you can recognize my name and you need something to do to fill the time in your miserable, wretched, empty existence. This is the last time I'm going to address your bullshit so you're going to have to find someone else to troll on, you pathetic little turd.

                • Velocifaptor

                  Thank you for choosing to no longer sully my witty banter with your subpar commentary, and I am truly glad to hear how popular you are with all the "ladies" on this site, who are surely flattered by your not-at-all-creepy commentary about their "cute bottoms." I don't pick on you, I pick on everyone, equally and I don't mind when I am picked on, it's called being guys, but someone as creepy and insecure as you wouldn't understand that.

                  • its_forge

                    I didn't grow up with brothers and the other dudes all thought I was weird because I was smarter than them. Lack of denial of your miserable empty existence noted.

                    • Velocifaptor

                      Said wasn't going to respond to my "bullshit." Still responded.

                      Trollface.

                • Brother Maynard

                  i know you're not a slutty looking chick in her early to mid 20s to early 30s(so the Chive probably won't do it) but you can ask the chive to verify whether the ip addresses are different or not. I GUARANTEE you they will be.

            • Brother Maynard

              no, he's got it perfectly foward. you're pretty damn creepy.

      • Nom

        Then you must not have heard that they're not allowed to use their phones in the army πŸ˜‰

    • its_forge

      2nded

    • WEe

      #38 since he's a Chiver, I bet he's tried to tap that…..

  • mark

    #14

    I love the gingers

    • stephanie

      redheads..gingers are soulless

    • the_junglist

      #14 WOW! A 1960 Yashica-D 120 TLR!!

      • TitoRigatoni

        Exactly what I was thinking.

      • Bill57

        #14 should be the winner of the playboy post

        • jdb

          I agree totally.

      • http://javelinphotos.com Javelin

        Pretty lame, first I felt in love with here.. and then with here camera.. thats a hell of a machine!

        Hottttdamnnn!

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=591747781 Erich Backhus

      My wife's a redhead and our daughter kept asking if this was her mommy.

    • Adam

      Good lord Jacie is beautiful.

      • Will13

        agreed

    • The_Marc

      Couldnt…..Agree……More…. ❀ ❀

  • Tyler

    #22 I wish m coworkers would lock me out on the beach for the day.

    • Karl

      I know right? I'd be happy to be locked out of the server room all day!

    • Red

      Yeah, screw Patty. What happened to the weight loss deal you made with the Chivers?

      • its_forge

        I think Whitney told them she wasn't going to take off any more clothing. = \

      • They See Me Trolling

        After the way Whitney got played by the Chive I don't think she'll be coming back. That was a rough one, even by my trolling standards.

        • https://www.facebook.com/ryadical Ryan Williams

          What is the story on this? What happened to Whitney?

          • They See Me Trolling

            Not really worth repeating, but it wasn't pretty. I am sure if you dig back deep enough you can find it.

      • WJOew

        yeah. what happend to ol' butterface?

    • Ampleforth

      First world problems …

      • haterade

        seriously, they steal enough from reddit, don't give them this idea to steal as well…

    • Angry Kid

      Sweating in the sun all day, that's one way to lose weight.

      • beardpapa

        #23 Look at what the left out there with him! Patty must be gay.

        • Velocifaptor

          Touche! I didn't even realize they were on the balcony until you pointed it out. Good work, but where's my coffee?

  • Phillip J. Fry

    #10 Gonna get that bitch a planet………bitches love planets

    • http://www.youtube.com/user/ADHDavenger13?feature=mhsn Firefighter23

      I see what you did with your name there

    • Clancy

      Thumbs up just for the name!!!!!!!

    • $$$

      And in a matter of days, all of the worlds women mysteriously disappeared, leaving many a kitchen behind, derelict.

      • Angry Kid

        This was actually the beginning to the movie "Children of Men."

        • Kyle

          They found a star a while back measuring 10 billion trillion trillion carats. They named it Lucy. Get it? Lucy? Come on, people.

  • TheRealSnowman

    #5 Like we need directions….

    • Brother Maynard

      #8

      proves the Chivers have almost no experience with women.

      • Jen

        you been on the chive for years now, dude

        • Brother Maynard

          i know. and i've been to both the chive meet ups. we're the saddest bunch of net fapping virgins and neck-beards this side of the internet. i'm just not so delusional that i won't admit it.

  • THEONEDOOD

    #29 i'd play that

    • Underbaker

      Game on!

    • Mike Apathy

      ↑ ↑ ↓ ↓ ← → ← → B A select start

      -Mike Apathy
      http://theoctopushamstring.com

      • http://twitter.com/ABQLifer @ABQLifer

        Yup, that's the G spot code

      • Oblivious

        Running that code will give her kidney failure.

    • DrGarnicus

      Start or Select? I can never decide!

    • giggitygiggitygoo

      I'd keep poking the reset button

      • Angry Kid

        She still won't turn into a dude, bro.

    • TokyoJohn

      I used to play one of those. It was fun!

      • hMMMM

        hmmm….can't tell if troll or really nice asian guy

  • FlyingSpagMonst

    I have a new office chair. It SUCKS.

    • Angry Kid

      Stop whining like a little bitch and throw it through your boss's office window, because that's how you fucking do.

  • Kaiwatha

    #2 : goddamn trolls….

    • Angry Kid

      I'm sorry, who took the jam out of your donut?

      • Kaiwatha

        You took the jam out of my doughnut Tommy, you did!

        • Velocifaptor

          In the quiet words of the Virgin Mary… come again?

          • Robert Plant

            shut the fuck up, faggots. goddamn american white people and their guy ritchie fanboy bullshit….

            • Kaiwatha

              well then it's a good thing that i'm neither

  • jason

    #32

    It was bound to happen sooner or later

    • Angry Kid

      Well, you know, not everyone is as smart, handsome and cool as you dude.

    • haterade

      The next day she found reddit and felt like a complete and total toolbag for having tattooed an asshat website name on her foot…

      • https://www.facebook.com/ramosjudice Samantha Judice Ramos

        Yeah… because it's my goal in life to be able to blame everything in life on being drunk like losers such as yourself. How about.. I just fucking wanted it. Douche

        • Umadbro?

          Umadbro?

          • https://www.facebook.com/ramosjudice Samantha Judice Ramos

            Not at all. Got an email from John saying I rock, and 2 free keep calm shirts are on their way to my house, Homie.

            • Umadbro

              A permanently inked reminder of bad decisions is surely worth every thread of those two free t-shirts. Thanks for the free advertising of the Chive for the rest of your life. Btw, I wonder how much Chive charges for a banner ad, the size of your tattoo, per day? Not sure, but my guess is more than two t-shirts worth. Stay classy.

              • Brother Maynard

                "classy"? she's a white chick who uses the word "homie"…..

                • https://www.facebook.com/ramosjudice Samantha Judice Ramos

                  Jealous? πŸ™‚

                  • LuvH8fulChix

                    The girl got a tattoo of something she likes. For fuck's sake guys… what's with all the hate? I have a Rainbow Brite tattoo on my dick.

                    (Love me some Rainbow Brite)

                    • https://www.facebook.com/ramosjudice Samantha Judice Ramos

                      Touche! πŸ™‚

                    • iUYUI

                      i don't think that word means what you think it means……….

                    • J_Dub

                      inconceivable indeed…. +1

        • Pwithc

          welcome to the interwebs

          • https://www.facebook.com/ramosjudice Samantha Judice Ramos

            IDK

            • Guz

              Send me a picture of your tits and I'll send you a free Tshirt. Honest.

              • https://www.facebook.com/ramosjudice Samantha Judice Ramos

                You can't handle it! πŸ™‚

                • Guz

                  Wouldn't really want to looking at your facebook page, thank you.

      • marcus

        don't sweat haterade. he's on the chive more than he's on reddit. one of our beloved trolls who gets off on knocking the chive b/c he secretly loves it. otherwise he wouldn't spend so much time here. chive on, Chivette.

        • https://www.facebook.com/ramosjudice Samantha Judice Ramos

          Hahaha!!! Chive on!

          • marcus

            chive on indeed. now get your heffer lookin' ass over here and slob on my huge 2 inch knob(well, huge for a chiver, from what i've seen at all the gay orgies we've had AKA the chive get togethers).

      • haterade

        Look at the wonderful community the chive has. I hope this thread teaches you asshats to shut the fuck up about your goddamn "community." You're a bunch of haters, just like me. Unlike me, however, you somehow convinced yourselves that being jock fags and picking on fat chicks in your "community" equates to a grand old gathering of wonderful people.

        Basically, if it isn't a skanky hoe or stolen from reddit, chivers have no interest.

    • thedarksideofthesound

      Tattoos are dumb

  • Jeff

    #2 !

  • Shawn

    #49 Nice!

    • Angry Kid

      Not bad, but would be nice if that ass wasn't so huge. Hit the stairmaster, girl, time to tone that badonka into a fit sexy butt.

      • Angry Kid

        Psych!

        Just kidding.

        Get. Her. A. Sandwich!!!!

    • its_forge

      Ignores troll, agrees with Shawn

      • Angry Kid

        Your creepy-ness defies any and all common sense.

      • OWEi

        creppy fuck.

  • http://www.facebook.com/eric.staab Eric Staab

    #11 yes.

    • Angry Kid

      You must be #17.

  • FlyingSpagMonst

    #4
    I have the weirdest boner right now.

    • Angry Kid

      Always knew you were into weathermen.

    • hMMMM

      did NOT see this comment coming…

  • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

    #47 So glad you're back dear Lauren!! <3<3<3
    BTW Holy Redhead, #14 is seriously gorgeous…. She would look great in my basement…

    Hugs,
    Paula
    "Paula is to Chivettes as DAR man is to awesome…"
    — LG – twitpic.com/5q3g21

    • Shawn

      Paula, you are just boring. No longer interesting/funny/entertaining anymore. We have lost any and all reason to hate you anymore.
      You are like a joke that has been told for the 15th time.
      You are like a warm beer on a hot day.
      You are…. not worth the time it took to write this.

      • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

        You know what the problem is? Being around something frightning for a long time will get you used to its precense. You'll no longer be afraid. Also you try to stay original/new/refreshing over a long period of time… IMPOSSIBRU!!!

        Hugs,
        Paula
        – the one you love to hate

        • TurdFerguson

          I think it's time for the unvieling. Come on Paula……move that bus, move that bus!!!!!!!

          • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

            We need a bigger bus.

            Hugs,
            Paula
            "Paula is to Chivettes as DAR man is to awesome…"
            — LG – twitpic.com/5q3g21

        • TokyoJohn

          What are you taking for that cold?! You'd better lay off it whatever it is!

      • its_forge

        And here you are responding to her/him/it.

    • its so obvious

      Paula is LG ,LG is paula. Both are ugly and huge attention whores.

      • a friend

        LG is naturally stunning, you are smoking some strong shit there. Even fully clothed being silly.

        And 'Paula' is from the Netherlands and is a dude. Still woking on the name.

        • WillyP

          yes LG is a smokeshow. slammin'

        • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

          Why am I a guy meow?

          Hugs,
          Paula
          "Paula is to Chivettes as DAR man is to awesome…"
          — LG – twitpic.com/5q3g21

        • WIOE

          no, he's just high on something called "good taste", mixed with a little of "lack of low standards".

  • ydodonutshave2die

    #9 thumbsuckers unite!

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=510682091 Graham Upshaw

      I'll give her something to suck on…… Just bought a tasty grape blowpop

      • Spooky

        Good Guy Greg

    • fredfender

      Am I some kind of a perv because she sort of gave me a chub? At least I hope it was her and not her bag? Or maybe it was the defib machine?? I'm so CONFUSED BY THIS!!???!!

    • TokyoJohn

      Once saw a guy picking his nose and eating it in public. That was gross; this is cute.

    • wawawawa

      saw this doing a hipster once in the subway. guess it's a hipster-thing.

  • panda

    #34, #35

    clever, chive

    • shaka

      Obama still sucks!!!!

      • http://thechive.com/ Award_Giver

        You win award of the day

    • YEM

      Why are there 2 Red Boxes?

      • peet

        One is showing available movies.

    • BelowHeavens

      Double clever comment there panda must thumbs up

    • Jay

      #34 I'm a fan of the rear view. Call me weird, but that thing sticks out too far to go unnoticed.

      • shaka

        looks like 200 pounds of cottage cheese in those pants….

  • http://thechive.com/ GernBlansten

    #11 Yup, it was the shirt alright…..

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000349369337 Rick Van de Schepop

    Great DAR, not going to post a favorite since I pretty much like all of them πŸ™‚

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=510682091 Graham Upshaw

      You don't have to worry #15 I will take #14 off of your hands for you. Since I am so selfless and all.

    • Angry Kid

      FFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

      If I could take the words of your useless comment and load them into a gun, like bullets, and shoot off your fingers with it, so you can never type another comment, I fucking would.

      • Bluto

        Perhaps you should lay down in a field of poppies and ponder some of the clamer things in life.

        • Bruno

          perhaps you should stop being a faggot.

  • FlyingSpagMonst

    #13
    I'm guessing watermelon was involved.

    • elay1300

      fa'Q

    • FreakyBobo

      And people say it's a false stereo-type…

    • kiddo

      that's straight up racist yo

    • TokyoJohn

      Well, in the OT, Esau sold his birthright to Jacob for a bowl of lentils. To each his own.

      • LuvH8fulChix

        Naw, it was stew. Totally worth it.

  • RhodeIslandChiver

    #49 moving to Georgia

    • Backdrag

      That is one perfect ass!

    • HillBilly Bone

      I should have never left. One hell of a peach right there.

    • Chris

      Relax, it's not that great, you're more likely to see #34 here.

  • KalEl24

    #14 … amazing

  • davis

    #47

    glad you're feeling better, Lauren πŸ™‚

    • http://gravatar.com/lagentile LG_

      Thank you Davis. πŸ™‚

      • Angry Kid

        FAKE LG! Lame.

        soyLG is the real LG, you can't fucking trick us you heathen.

        • http://gravatar.com/lagentile LG_

          Nah, I'm the real gal. I have my google profile verified and my skype verified as well through my gravatar account. No more twitter or social media, but my skype and google account still remain.

          • Angry Kid

            Can you prove it by showing us your tits or something??

            • Angry Kid

              Ah yes, the old Agent Smith trick.

          • lurker

            why no twitter?

            • http://gravatar.com/lagentile LG_

              Keeping my life a bit more private from now on – good ol' fashion phone calls and emails are my preferred choice of social media. πŸ™‚

              • lie detector

                Yes ,you should keep ur life pvt ,coz posing in ur underwear for all the world to see is definitely a pvt thing to do for hoes. Keep it up !

                • the dude

                  What? She usually poses in a t-shirt or tank top or bikini. You are stupid as shit, it's official. She's probably the only chivette that DOESN'T send in pics of her ass/tits in underwear.

                • CHIVETTE #2

                  2nded.

          • Agent Smith

            If you are, in fact, the real LG. What is the photo of, in the pictureframe in your bedroom?

            • Angry Kid

              It's my penis…

              • Angry Kid

                No, it's my penis.

            • http://gravatar.com/lagentile LG_

              It's a picture of me and my bf taken in Paris at Notre Dame. Paula shopped it and put her troll pic in it though.

              • Angry Kid

                does that mean no picture of you nude shall be forthcoming??

                • http://gravatar.com/lagentile LG_

                  I turned down Playboy because I am opposed to posing nude, so there's your answer.

                  • More Possibly . .. ?

                    How about some of the not nude but lightly clothed and totally hot ones you are so well known for? You still have many who like and appreciate you , so glad you are well no matter your answer.

              • They See Me Trolling

                Password accepted.

          • http://twitter.com/sterlingsylvir @sterlingsylvir

            I remember that day you deleted your twitter. So depressing. Was having a fantastic day too. Got a picture posted on the chive, got to talk on my favorite lunch time radio talk show, got my dog back from the vet, got a promotion, and then even got a congrats from you on twitter. Then… it happened. Felt like I should make an FDR style speech.

            • Guesty

              Fucking Christ man. Relax with this stuff just a little bit.

            • Angry Kid

              might I suggest a hooker?

              • Angry Kid

                That actually is something I might have said. High five.

                • Angry Kid

                  then I salute you sir

            • Agent Smith

              Is this fur real?

              • Angry Kid

                no its faux fur

                • Angry Kid

                  some people might call it a merkin

                  • Gangly Kid

                    Some people might paint it in a rainbow of colours.

            • Brother Maynard

              chirst, you're a pathetic, internet lounging bitch…….

              • you need help

                Because she comments a few times after being offline and bed-bound for 2 weeks? And because she doesn't have any social media? …Makes sense. /end sarcasm

                You are fucking retarded 'Brother'.

                • Brother Maynard

                  wasn't talking to her. retard.

          • Dylan

            Glad your doing better girl!
            Take it easy and don't rush yourself!

            And for petes sake stay away from any and all birds!

            • http://gravatar.com/lagentile LG_

              Thank you, gorgeous! Hope you're doing well also. πŸ™‚

              And feathers are far more dangerous than they look. Innocent looking little buggers.

              • omega

                Oh dear ol mighty the most annoying slut on the planet is back wth all her yapping !
                Please go away.

                • Samuel Jackson

                  All her yapping? She commented 3 times. It's sad how fucked up some of you people are. Every chiver knows how obsessed you are with her. You are the annoying, attention seeking slut. Move on with your life, the girl is a gem and isn't even showing skin. Do yourself a favor and leave this site – it may be hard since you love it so much, but it'll be for the best for everyone.

                • Owiq

                  agreed.

      • sac 916

        THANK YOU, if this is the real you! xoxoxo

        • http://facebook.com/daaneskjold Chazz_B

          hey Lauren, what happened to you? I didn't hear about it =( my chivery level is going down… anyway i am glad that you are ok =)

          • a friend

            She had a nasty case of bacterial pneumonia because she picked up an infected feather at her work. Sick as hell for a while there.

            • Guesty

              *STD

              • The boyfriend

                Not even close. She's been with two guys her whole life and is as clean as a whistle. A bacterial lung disease isn't an STD, idiot. Grow some balls, get an education, and keep your bullshit 5 year old thoughts to yourself. You're not funny, no matter how hard you try.

                • Jen

                  coast guard?

                • Guesty

                  Stalk much, as I am positive you are not the boyfriend. Scary how much random strangers know about this broad. No wonder she got rid of social media access. Now all her chive "friends" won't be able to call her a friend anymore, as I am sure none of you loser fanboys have her # and e-mail…. HA!

                  • Brother Maynard

                    ThatGuy is secretly crying in his mom's basement while jerking off to her profile pic.

          • awesome sauce

            She blew a seagull and got chlamydia. True Story.

    • patov40

      GENTILE!!! Glad you're feeling better. Be well! B)

  • http://www.facebook.com/gregisgreg Greg Lee

    FIND #44 Video

    • Kaiwatha

      it's originally a super slow mo video made by photography-ractory.co.uk, or you can just see it here: http://vimeo.com/25262556

      • Kaiwatha

        oops *factory not ractory

    • Jethro

      "Hey can you help with my costume for my act? Make sure it stays in place!" Her (cirque du soleil artist)
      'Ummmm…. (fap fap fap fap..Fap fap) Ok ready!" Him (assistant)

  • Backdrag

    Finally some tits that aren't fake!! #25

  • Henrik

    #20 ''You want to taste my cock soup? It's very spicy.''

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