Daily Afternoon Randomness (52 Photos)

Alaina’s amazing COTW post right here.

  • Trollolol


    • DCMOFO
      • atreyufanchiver

        THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!! – MADE MY DAY xD

    • Giggity

      Fuck off

    • Beej

      ha! i gave you you your 201st thumbs down and it was at 203 before i finished typing

    • You stupid idiot

      God will be forsaking you now

    • Eder St. Cool

      Suck dick troll

  • sdawson22


  • John

    The goddam DAR is late

    Also, #50, #52

    • makr


      is it true you let chivers in the office if they have a 12 pack? friend of a friend says he got in, don't believe him

      • John

        If somebody offers me a beer I generally drink it

        • Swanick

          Good policy.

        • general wang

          Are you aware you have the coolest life ever?

          • John

            Very much so. I think the moment I start taking any of this for granted, the Chivers would probably notice and bury me in a bag full of assholes, I'd prolly deserve that too.

            Except if I got to date Oliva Munn out of this. Then I'd be forced to prioritize and move to an island with her so I can do things that would be illegal back in the states. The internet would have to wait.

            • Swanick

              Nah prolly throw you in a pit with first posters.

            • _me

              This man has his priorities straight!

            • Jayyy

              What's going on with the e-mails John?

        • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

          Ah! Care for a free beer?

          – still messing with your toothbrush at night

        • DrLeppiwinks

          witnessed this in Vegas, and he will also just hand you a beer if you happen to not have one in your hand, which is actually even cooler than the first part.

        • SweetAwesomeness

          #50 #52
          no apology needed…

        • _me

          #12 is called "The Motorboat Zone". John, that appears to be exactly where you are.

        • Heres_Johnny30

          I've offered once and I'll offer again. I've Couple of beers with your name on em. Don't be scared.

    • Heres_Johnny30

      Good for me b/c I'm still in the office in Atlanta!

    • Spencer_on_Fire

      Thank you for noticing John….haha.

      But hell of a way to make up for it

    • Muadieb

      It's okay. #52 forgives all!

    • Unfkngblvbl

      hope you sell NONE on ebay, dickweed.

    • Doug

      Yea the people who run this site really need to GET WITH IT

    • DrLeppiwinks

      Blame it on Vegas… and thank you for her

    • tommytwotime


    • Dr.Thinksalot

      Man, #50 is such a perfect 10 – please add her to the Chive Calendar for the 13th month (Dartemberary)

    • Hillbilly hank

      I propose a contest of how long I can motorboat #52 with one breath! I know there will be some personal suffering involved, but for the chivers I will do it. (said suffering being passing out from lack of oxygen)

    • miliano

      Idea for competition, I'm sure everyone has said this already but "Win a date with a Chivette". I'm sure that everyone would like that idea and as for other chivettes that would like to be a part of the contest but feel that this is only for the chivers, come on who wouldn't won't to date a chivette.

      • Rick Derris

        you have a pretty sad life huh???

  • akbrown006

    MOARRRR of this would be accepted.

  • Mikey G

    DAR makes up for BMF confusion. Thank you chive!

    • Dan

      *BFM. Chive on.

    • sheoncebelieved

      she needs to lose the bra and cover the nips with the suspenders

  • http://thechive.com/ GernBlansten

    #1 I'll say it. That baby is UGLY!

    • Dr.Thinksalot

      Apparently one can have no soul and still type!

  • KeepCalmDriveOn

    #35 Time to prove it

    • Csquaredapparel

      Looks like some sort of an intervention! shame.

      • Rahm Emanuel

        that my friend is a pic from a porn…she takes on both dudes…you are welcome…and yes she has daddy issues big time!

        • Zaed

          What's her name? For, uh… Purely academic reasons. Ahem.

          • danno29388

            Riley Brooks, before she was enhanced.

            • ProdigalSOB

              and now that she is enhanced and older you can find her at a local watering whole as a waitress in Amarillo.

              • travbo

                Where in Amarillo?

    • Luke

      yeah i know that movie. "you can cum on my face for free,' see mumbles at the end. quality!

  • Nick_FTW

    #8 she has a beautiful smile

    • dochandy

      she has a beautiful everything!

    • KeepCalmDriveOn

      Beautiful smile, bright blue eyes, and that confident look that would make a man crumble. I'd say she's an angel.

    • Mac

      She has a face?!

    • Dr. Spaceman

      Who is she, and where can we get MOAR?

    • travioso

      I bet she has a nice vertical smile too

  • etcrr

    #8 #17 Moar! Please!

    • etcrr

      But unfortunately we are just stuck with more of your stupid posts,

    • a$$man

      I bet both of these ladies taste absolutely divine…and I'm not talking about making out here people…

    • etcrr 126p

      i think i may have to put these two on lay-by…….

    • sheeeesh

      Dear god this asshole is STILL at it ? Get a life and some fukin self respect fucknut.

    • CaNaDaaa


  • Italy

    I would pee ALL over #50's butt to mark my territory.

    • cindy b


    • womp

      i chuckled

      • Pudge

        Same, I laughed then saw the 130 thumbs down and was all "awww poor little fella"

    • Rest of the World

      I would snap your territory marker off before you fouled her.

      • heussein obama

        that "rest of the world guy" is just looking for an excuse to grab a dick.

        • Rick Derris

          *hussein either way he sucks…

    • hellyeah

      This is what these sluts deserve.

    • Judsonian

      I think we may have found the winner for the "mail order bride contest"

  • Daniel R.

    Seriously…. I think I lost an hour of work just clicking refresh.

    • hark1985

      You and me both man. Thought my computer had an issue

      • tommytwotime

        I was staring at excel sheets and PDFs thinking "I can't fap to this!!!"

    • Ron Paul 2012

      Better luck being the 'first' douche tomorrow.

  • leon


    Suggestions to win a mail order minx:

    • Heres_Johnny30

      I almost want to say BRING ON THE THUNDER DOME!!!!

      • Heres_Johnny30

        Billy Madison type academic decathlon

        • Shinanigins

          I am now dumber for listening to that

    • HEAT

      scroll the hump dar without getting a half chub and you win!

      • Unfkngblvbl

        not sure that's a "win" buddy. Chive On though!

    • http://twitter.com/shawthomas25 @shawthomas25

      Beer pong till the last man standing

    • http://thechive.com/ Paula_

      Kill Paula.

      – the one you love to hate

      • Juan G

        won me with that idea

    • BigS

      Drinking. I always win at the game of drink. I would totally rock a contest for a mail order bride. Hey wanna hear How I met Your Mother?

    • Glitch247

      Forever alone contest, most pathetic wins, cause lets face it they'll need it

    • KennyL_3

      Get a 2 man team and go heavyweights on it (the movie) with The Blob. Each team will have a jumper (who jumps onto The Blob) and a launchee (Don't need to explain). Which ever team manages to launch their teammate the highest wins. Best of luck!

      • Anon

        Will the mail-order bride be shared, then?

        • KennyL_3

          I'm sure The Chive could work out a buy one get one free or buy one get one half off deal for the winning team. If not… let's face it anyone desperate enough for a mail order bride is prolly willing to share her.

    • Dennis.

      A drink off!
      or actually, maybe a smash off!
      no wait…
      maybe a drinking/smash- off..
      two part contest, who can drink the most, then who can smash the most amount of stuff in a time period, each out of 50. winner takes the soul-less empty eyed bride-to-be home.
      let the games begin.

      • that_ALBANIAN_guy

        I think you're already half-way there. Chive on though.

    • Amadeusrex

      I'd suggest something … but the wife might have a problem with that.

    • derekkleyne

      Suggest Best Picture Where You Could Where a KCCO Shirt (for those who don't have one) And The Top 25 Pic's Would Be Rewarded With One!

    • Underbaker

      Should be more then just one type of event, mix it up with some events like "Find Her" (put names to a picture(s) ), Caption This (come up with some decent captions to funny pics), Is it true (figure out if little known facts are true or not), and I'm sure other chivers will come up with some good ones…

      • Underbaker


    • Dr.Thinksalot

      Contest Idea – How many Chiver's can get folks in their office to wear any kind of chive shirt (bonus points if you get the hot/FLBP employees to show underboob)

      • HotashNerd

        no one owns chive shirts… to impossible to buy 😦

    • Slappy White

      I'm a 1% er upper middle class white guy who owns a Bill F'in Murray shirt. I've been stabbed by 3 different women. Hit with a baseball bat by another. Had another swing a machete at me. Had two try and run me over with their cars…. I was married for 17 years & I'm a normal guy according to my ex wife with whom I'm friends. I just invite crazy. Put me in a room with 499 other guys and 2 bi-polar women ad they would end up in a knife fight over me…. With that being said… I wonder if a Russian woman is crazier than an American? I'm not willing to find out. I'm out of this.

      • jjj

        If you've been stabbed by 3 different women then you should stop picking up gangster bitches.
        I seriously don't know 1 man that has been stabbed by 1 woman much less 3.

        • Monday Cecil

          Yes, because women are perfect and crap unicorn sprinkles. The 'prize' for this competition is a curse numbnuts. At some point in your life you will stop being a pathetic slave to yoru penis, your eyes will open up wide and will NOT continue to see women as these unblemishable little dolls.

          • FancyDan

            My penis told me that Cecil doesnt make sense.

          • 1gecko

            I fear the day men 'wake up' and stop being 'slaves' to their penises:
            a) because the human race would die the f***k out – no one would go through all the hassle to have sex if it wasn't for their penis' drive! Seriously – even for us older guys, sure we are not as insane NOW, but we also would never have gotten married or dated THEN to get this way!
            b) because penises have 90% of the drive and ambition of most men – they wouldn't do it or worry about it if it didn't affect their chance to get laid (and waaaaay too many studies have backed that up). We would still be living in the most primative and squalid condtions (assuming 'a' hadn't kicked in already and we were extinct).

      • Lisa

        All women are crazy Slappy. So are men. You just have to find a chick who'll put up with your brand of crazy as much as you can put up with hers. πŸ˜‰

      • guest


        • Monday Cecil

          No, that wasn't me, I am well toward the bottom of the 99% but it is creepy that you automatically went there. Who the hell is this?
          But no, that is someone else.

      • i'm me

        Cool story bro!

      • Monday Cecil

        good man.

      • Judsonian

        Easy to see who is < 30 and who is >30 Completely respect what you're saying!

    • Herro

      A twitter man hunt. Hide Mac somewhere (in the U.S.) and every hour Mac has to take a picture and post to twitter giving away a clue regarding his location.
      1) Don't talk about Chive twitter man hunt.
      2) Mac must be somewhere visible. (No pillow forts in IKEA)
      3) Due to patriot act, governmental employees with secret security clearances are disqualified.
      4) Must be a chivette-oriented prize too, in case a chivette wins.
      5) Mac may move around, but cannot move more than 1 block from his previous location. Every time he moves he must post another picture. Cannot move more than once per hour.
      6) 12 hour time limit.

      This might work best at a big event. (SXSW is still going on in Austin throughout the rest of this week hint hint)

      • Corey

        Really like this idea.

        Plus, Mac gets a vacation and you guys get to get rid of him. First to tweet a photo of you and Mac wins…

        • Monday Cecil

          I we hunting him with a crossbow? I don't have a crossbow right now. I have a regular little recurve, but I doubt it would take a blogger.

      • Stirke Eagle WSO

        agree with all but #3. Man up and do what it takes: rule 76-no excuses, play like a champion!

      • Jack_LeMac

        Woo! SXSW! This should happen, even if it's not for a mail-order bride; maybe some other, lesser prize

      • Smack76

        We don't all live in the US mate its a global community

    • Lisa

      Winner cannot ever, EVER have said "first" at any point in attempt to break a cherry on the DAR, or any other post.

      Winner must agree to send many pictures of said bride in various stages of undress, for at least one year so future purchasers can have a guesstimate as to what their brides will do.

      As for the contest itself, ALL contestants must exhibit truly chivish behavior. Help others when given the chance; drink copious amounts of alcohol safely; exhibit non-douchery when driving; admire the gaps; commiserate with those who have lower back problems; shoot various duck-faces faster than Duck Hunt; have true appreciation for those who lay their asses on the line for America; and the winner will be the one who is ABLE TO KEEP THE FUCKING KCCO SHIRTS IN STOCK ALL THE DAMN TIME.

      • Albus Q

        Great ideas. A lot of people could win if you hadn't added the last line.

        • Lisa

          In my best Highlander voice "There can be only one" Albus. πŸ˜‰

          • Mokuseitora

            just give it to Lisa… and lets see if she can do all she said!

            • Lisa

              Moku…I love women. We are some of the most amazing creatures God ever put on the planet. From the hair on our heads to the tips of our toes, we are all sorts of awesome. Having said that…WHY WOULD I WANT A WIFE?!? Have you ever met a woman? We are batshit crazy with biscuits and gravy on top. I'm crazy enough all on my own!!! πŸ˜€

              But if they have a mail order groom thing going, I'd be in. πŸ™‚ πŸ˜‰ And the only thing that'd be a challenge for me is the shirts. But, I've got people…if John wants to holler at me, he can. Hopefully they'll get the kinks worked out.

      • JAFitC

        KCCO Shirt Shortage Solution (KCCOSSS):
        1. Announce a period during which orders will be taken, say 48 hours.
        2. Payment is due at the time each shirt is ordered.
        3. Shirts are produced knowing the number needed.
        4. Shirts are shipped to happy Chivers, who can Keep Calm and Chive On.
        Added benefits of KCCOSSS:
        1. Everyone around the world has an equal chance.
        2. Potentially screws douchenozzles who order shirts for resale.
        Lastly, repeat as needed.

    • Reber

      This has to be a contest about who has the most money. Otherwise, RMOB will freak out and start throwing shoes and screaming about sexual slavery.

      • Monday Cecil

        Sexual slavery is anytime a woman says she didn't profit enough.

    • Scotian

      A radio station in Halifax is doing a contest like this now, winner goes to the czech republic and dates various mail order brides and chooses his bride.

      • From_The_Hip

        Really?? I haven't hear it yet. Which one? And what if a woman wins?

    • AnnaMolly

      There's a contest already underway in Nova Scotia. However, I'm sure anything they have planned for the competition will be frou-frou compared to anything Chivers will agree to participate in. Good times. http://www.nationalpost.com/Halifax+radio+station

    • PFry

      scraper bike contest!

      Thank You Chive! Thank You Mail Order Bride Lady

    • http://twitter.com/tonytouch24kt @tonytouch24kt

      Bracket style caption contest for different photos every day. And I'll take the M.O.B. from the pic please and thanx.

    • Ruben

      beer pong!!!

    • illuminati

      Jousting…..full on jousting, horses and everything. 3 day tournament

    • Joey

      Ugliest wife or girlfriend contest…

      • HogFan22

        ok so i think we should make it something a bit more crazy and extreme like idk. Who can take the biggest Grenade for themselves just to specify they have to be not only overweight but unattractive as well. Pics must be provided along with signed proof that it happened by at least 2 other Chivers. just a thought but it sounds like it could be fun and well if you are so brave and lonely that u can take a grenade for yourself u deserve to win. Good luck and God speed KCCO

    • Thad Castle

      Dick Pics… clearly we want our Russian bride winner to represent America properly

      • RuffieG11


        The Bride goes to the first Chiver (or possibly Chivette) who can get a real picture with Bill Murray while HE (Bill Murray) is wearing BFM.

        First submission wins.

    • Fat_Chiver

      You should contact Bill Murray and arrange it so Chivers can meet up at a point to do this contest which would involve each Chiver coming up and giving a little comedy skit until one of them can make Bill Fucking Murray cry laughing.

    • Lisa

      A contest to see which chiver can ring the most doorbells, run away and not get caught.

    • Jacob

      who can give the chive the most money…am i on to something here? No? okay

    • Brandon B

      In following this time of year, a March Madness style tournament of Slap Shot.
      2 people take a shot
      As soon as the empty shot glass hits the table you slap your opponent
      Loser is the 1st to Pass out, Tap out, or get Knocked out.
      Winner take all

    • Jonestown

      Best KCCO tattoo.

      Tattoos and marriage are forever, sort of.

    • Roclawzi

      Easy rules for an easy to play but relatively difficult to win contest.

      All you need is a camera and a KCCO. Shirt is preferable, but making your own or using a print out or sign is fine.

      Go to a larger venue, a big crowded scene, and have someone take your picture in the midst of the big crowd with your KCCO displayed. Submit picture and a close picture of yourself (for verification!) and the person with the most "Where's Waldo"-esque submission wins. The bigger the crowd, the further the picture…you give the idea.

    • Chris

      How about the first person who can fix the web store so it doesn't go down. lol

    • Monday Cecil

      Since this is still a competition for who can be the most pathetic, and least masculine, in the pursuit of a damned vagina, I stand by the red hot pennies theory. At least show us you REALLY want it.
      I mean, if there is one thing that history has taught us, it's that a whole bunch of 'men' will physically cut their kid brothers throat for a little snatch.

      I feel that men are truly represented well in this endeavor.

    • 8008315

      Run a marathon for charity. The ones where you collect donations. Chiver, or Chivette even, who collects the most money after finishing the run wins. Chive matches the amount collected and that's the limit to pay for the M.O.B. Everyone wins. Charities make money. Knowing there's a limit inspires people to collect more. People get in shape (More fit Chivettes and/or Guys for theBERRY). Help out a good cause. Chive contributes to that by motivating people to help out. Participants who don't win the M.O.B get some sort of Chive merch gift as thank you. Special prizes for 2nd and 3rd place, perhaps. Tee shirts for everyone else.

      Even if the M.O.B contest doesn't happen, got to admit, it'd work for any other themed contest. πŸ˜€

  • etcrr

    #50 #51 #52 Holy shit she's hot

    • Matt

      Amen, I love every single photo she sends in… AMAZING

    • Matt

      I seriously cannot stop scrolling back up and down to see these photos. Just amazing !

    • average chiver

      Fap fap fap fap fap fap fap fap fap fap fap fap

    • Rick Derris

      FUCK OFF STAN!!! thanks,

  • Fart

    #46 Dirk Nowitzki's Family traveled pretty far for his last home opener

    • herro

      Definately no inbreeding here.

    • Lt. Dan

      I thought this was a family portrait of the Gaffigans.

      • tralfaz

        hot pocketsss

    • L/A Bob

      More like Terry Bradshaw's family!

    • El Jefe de Jefes

      You sir, owe me a Heineken. I spit all over my laptop. Well played.

    • Matt

      Its the Targaryans. The Dragons will rule Westeros again!

  • Arktik_Arkitekt

    #46 Meanwhile in Utah …

    • Patrick

      Oddly enough, I think they're Indian…

      • EnragedGonad

        ….Meanwhile in Indiana.

      • Walter

        Also, Indian is not the preferred nomenclature … Native-American, please.

        • Duderino

          Fucking Walter … we're not talking about World War II codetalkers, Eastern Indians … and they peed on my fucking rug!

          • guest

            they did? when?

          • The J

            Arktik, you're out of your element here, Dude, the indian is not the issue here.

  • Unfkngblvbl

    #18 We were promised fucking yoga pants…weak DAR BTW

    • guest

      Blame Reddit

      • Unfkngblvbl

        …really? and LOLbrary and every other photo blog site, sharing photos? Forget it, must not feed troll.

    • GrainofDust

      The wall had an erection???????

    • Lotus

      The girls were so slutty in this one, a typical weak DAR on a Tuesday

  • asb


  • daaaaaaaaayum.

    Briggity boom bap! Quality far with a perfect ending

  • Mr E

    #22 Class dismissed!

    • Nick


      • Kodos

        fuck it, I'll take my chances with fake ID

        • Jesus

          It's called lie about everything, get the bitch so biltzed she doesn't remember the past 3 weeks, and do her somewhere discrete in a different city. But I would only say that if I encouraged potentially illegal activities, which, of course, I don't…

          • Matt

            Rape jokes, huh? Not Chive-worthy, douchebag.

      • Cantaloupe

        Good point Nick. Guys who fuck 14-year-olds do go to jail, right before they go to prison. By the looks of it, you'd get the maximum sentence for fucking a mentally handicapped 14-year-old.

        • Rick Derris

          Where is that douche etcrr… his old ass would be all about this jailbait…

    • B.J.

      Yeah class dismissed so you can head straight to jail. She is Jailbait!

    • guest


    • Dick Salad

      It's legal somewhere

    • ApacheSquad

      please be 18……

    • Admiral A.

      It's a trap!

    • Pedro Bear

      oh hai

    • thatguy

      "Since people don't like duckface, I'll just do retard face"

    • Ty-Ty

      15 will get you 20

    • unknown-chiver

      "Trust me, I won´t upload this on facebook…"

    • nuccabay

      never had these girls in HS…seriously though chive isnt there a way to check age? oh wait its a classroom full of girls that are wearing the exact same outfit, she MUST be in college

    • aw253

      pedo alert

    • Kyle

      15 will get you 20.

    • THAT_GUY

      There is nothing illegal about the picture… relax

      • Matt

        This is a COLLEGE class. Notice the girl in the background with a laptop on her desk–they don't allow that in HS, but it's standard in a college. So it's all good.

    • Mike

      Every male teacher that day considered the consequences.

    • Gallus

      I guess I've gotten old. I love the Chivettes, but this one doesn't appeal to me at all.

    • smokin

      back to school

    • dominantone

      Only benefit to school uniforms.

    • MichaelC

      Replying to this: moralfags

  • a grunt


    you know it's going to be big when professor is letting us out of class early for a shirt

    • a grunt

      and now he just realized the presale was for an entire day and won't let us out. thanks a lot, chive

      • Lisa

        Thank you for your service though. And here's hoping you'll get a shirt or 3. πŸ˜‰

    • Jeff (US Navy)

      I was under the impression this is only for the military.

      • Geoff

        Yeah is the pre-sale for active duty military?

    • matt

      may have to buy one and cut the sleeves off–im canadian

      • Geoffedup

        haha have some broad sew a pair of jean jacket sleeves on that bad boy and you will be styling

        • morebeer

          I'm Canadian, its not true, but it made me laugh eh

    • KennyL_3

      Half my squadron is trying to get one of these. I have tried for the last 3 times to get a KCCO shirt (British internet sucks). We finally have a chance πŸ™‚

      • Lisa

        Good luck with your shirt search, and thank you. Come home safe when your mission allows. πŸ˜‰

        • KennyL_3

          Thanks on both accounts. It's people like you that not only help us get through doing what we do but, also help remind us why we are proud to defend out country. So, on behalf of the military community, thank you for your support.

          • Lisa

            I've lived that life Kenny. My ex and his spotter followed orders in Bosnia during the early/mid 90's. That life is not easy. But it's worth it.

            A link to my facebook is in my Intense Debate profile. Any service member ever wants to holler at me, feel free. Y'all have my truest gratitude. Seriously.

            • KennyL_3

              Thanks and happy to say I got myself and a few friends that were working during the release some T-shirts πŸ™‚ I can finally KCCO in style.

    • light infantry

      for all that is righteous, can i please get a damn shirt. 0 for 4 right now!! wheres the supply and demand when you need it?

    • Overseas

      hmmm…it will be 20:00 hrs my time and I will have access to the internet and I have a military e-mail and mailing address…hopefully I will get one πŸ™‚

    • LtSlapyamama

      How are people going to prove they're military? ID?

  • http://twitter.com/economistnick @economistnick

    #50 #51 #52 your a goddess

    • Lucas


      • truth

        nice tittie

        • truth

          both of them actually

          • I heart chivettes

            Holy mother of god. This girl is the perfect ten. Chivette, hot ass fuck, incredible rack, amazing tush, and eyes that pierce straight through a man's heart. #50 #51 #52

            • Matt

              Absolutely AMAZING #50 #51 #52

              • i can't spell

                yesssss…i do certainly love sluts =D

    • @economistnick

      You`re a Slut.

    • Gallus

      I love the way this girl says, "Thank you."

  • daaaaaaaaayum.

    Briggity boom bap! Quality dar with a perfect ending

  • dochandy

    #33 #46 WITH FIRE!!!

  • JohnD

    #17 Wow, this girl is beautiful. I scroll down and scroll right back up

    • Falthor

      the black and white makes this picture just the right amount of classy too, although I am wondering what color her bra is…

  • coinbank

    #33 oh dear god for all the is holy for fucks sake

    • synthetictruism


      • coinbank

        anti-wood too….auto deflater

    • Oli

      Hey at least she is wearing Cankel Pants!

      • Etalicus

        I do believe she trying to escape from them

    • Amadeusrex

      Chive .. I think you have misunderstood. There are those of use who want more girls with curves … not lumps.

      • Lotus

        Those boneheads can't tell the difference, a shame really.

      • Maynard B.

        Lumps!? Like cottage cheese cellulite lumps? EWWWWW!!!

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