Brian, I have to hand it to you buddy – you dream big. You set out to write a story badass enough to rival The Odyssey by Homer and you fuckin’ nailed it. Bravo. It might be the crudely drawn photo of you standing on boobs wielding a sword, it might be the fact that you described a girl as wearing a “Star Wars shirt that is so small that her huge boobs looked huger”, but you did something special here little guy.
Your only mistake was writing ‘Mom Don’t Read’ on the cover. She clearly interpreted that as ‘Mom Please Upload This To The Internet So That The World Can See’. You live and you learn.