91-year-old great grandmother Jean Oddi wasn’t afraid to tell it like it was. And her obituary, written as her in the first person by her granddaughter, captures her aesthetic perfectly.
You probably never knew the sassy “bitch” with a “kind heart” from Ohio who loved nothing more than drinking Jameson and playing cards, but after reading this, you’ll miss her like she was your own grandma.
“I hate to admit it, but evidently I died. I guess, after all these years, God finally figured out where to put me. I should have known the end was near after I had to be in room # 20 in the emergency room. I hate even numbers. I’m leaving behind a hell of a lot of stuff Casey and Melissa will have to get rid of. So, if you’re looking for random crap, you should wait the appropriate amount of time and get in touch with them.
But this is not the time to talk about what I may or may not have bought from the JC Penney Outlet or TJ Maxx, this is about me. I was born on September 7, 1925 in blah, blah, blah, the daughter of a wonderful and beautiful woman and an SOB man.
To Shirley, hell, what can I say? We saw it all, did it all and had a ball! Thank you for putting up with all my shit. You are my oldest friend and I loved every minute we had together. I will always remember when my mom and I tormented Casey’s suitors, crazy, fun times at Buckeye Lake, on Strawberry and Geers, gardening, modeling, being crafty and shopping, any time I spent dancing with the baby, listening to good music, playing blackjack and the crazy game, playing any card game with Guy, Shirley and Joe.
I loved the smell of lavender, drinking hot coffee, teaching my granddaughter dirty songs, telling jokes and stories from the bad old days, cooking and eating, hosting huge holiday meals, baking pizzelles, cookies and cakes, including one that takes 4 days!
I had hilarious and memorable adventures to Florida, Washington DC, Vegas, Alaska, Hawaii, Mexico, Australia, Europe, the Panama Canal and sorry Casey, Canada. Oh, dammit, I really wanted to go to Asia.
I’m proud to have been the president of my own corporation, #1 AH, and to have received my doctorate in Bitchology, please see my card. I enjoyed showing dogs and remember Missy, Princess, Ms. Tweetie and my sweet Caroline. I sure hope there is CNN wherever I’m going so I can check on my stocks
Please remember this: never let the facts get in the way of a good story, the middle finger is sign language; when someone gives, take; when someone takes, scream, and take care of yourself. Don’t get old. Oh, and don’t tell anyone what kind of day to have.”
The obituary was so relatable, people who had never known Jean felt like they had.
